I ran a hand from her waist down the curve of her hip and along her thigh, my kisses growing more demanding. The thick clouds surrounding us made me feel as though we were in our own little bubble. Though I could sense the others flying nearby, we couldn’t see them, and Jeriad’s head was set forward, many feet away from us. It almost felt as though we were alone, drifting through these clouds. Just the two of us.
We spent the next few hours of the journey wrapped in each other’s arms, enjoying every moment of this opportunity to be with each other completely uninterrupted by the rest of the world.
Chapter 6: Ben
The oracle had told me in no uncertain terms that it wasn’t possible to exorcise this Elder in the way that others had been exorcised. For one thing, his influence had been ingrained in my system for too long. That meant there was only one option:
Somehow, he had to decide to abandon me.
I had to make things so difficult and uncomfortable for this spirit that he chose to do so of his own accord.
I racked my brain as to what I could possibly do to bring this about. Each time, the idea I came back to was… Starvation. It was the only logical thing I could think of. The reason he had bonded with me to begin with was to use me for blood. If I didn’t give him what he wanted, what reason would he have to stay within me? I had no idea whether it would work, but at this point, I’d crossed the brink of desperation. There was nothing else on the table, and no hope of any other idea coming soon, so I had no choice but to attempt it.
Brushing the golden snake band around my wrist, I summoned Nuriya to me once again. There was a look of relief and trepidation on her face.
“What have you decided?” she asked.
“I need you to take me far away from any humans, preferably still somewhere underground, and lock me up. You will leave me, and if I summon you and ask you to give me human blood, you’re not to give it to me.”
She hesitated. “For how long will you stay away?”
I gritted my teeth. As long as it takes. “I don’t know,” I replied.
“Have you thought about the effect starving yourself might have on you?”
I nodded, even though I hadn’t been able to think about it. I wasn’t sure what effect starvation had on vampires… But now it seemed I had no choice but to find out.
“Well, I’m not comfortable about my child going hungry,” Nuriya said, “but if you really want to try this… I know somewhere I can take you. It’s in the desert, many miles away from here. A little hideout I created underground for myself—I still go there every now and then when I want time alone.”
“Perfect,” I said.
“Do you want to leave now?”
“Yes. Now.”
A few moments later, I found myself standing with Nuriya in a spacious room tiled with black marble. There was a deep red rug in the center, a bed in one corner, and a sitting area with shelves filled with books of some kind. There was also a desk and chair, and even a small dining table for two.
“The bathroom is through there,” she said, pointing to a door behind me.
I breathed in, pleased by what I sensed. It seemed that we were very far away from any humans—I couldn’t detect even the slightest trace of human blood, unlike in the jinn’s atrium where the prison was situated just above it.
“This will do fine,” I said.
“There are some books over there, some of them in English,” she said. “But I’m not sure what else you’ll do to entertain yourself all day.”
As the hunger pangs in my stomach intensified, the very last thing on my mind was entertaining myself. I just needed to survive.
Nuriya kissed the top of my head. “Goodbye, Benjamin.”
“Remember,” I said, looking at her sternly, “no blood—no matter how much I beg.”
She appeared reluctant, and something told me that she might even disobey my request and come to spy on me to check that I was still holding up. That I didn’t mind so much, as long as she didn’t do anything to jeopardize my fast.
Humans could survive for weeks without food; I was about to find out how long a vampire could live without blood. But one thing I did know was that I had to push myself to the very edge—perhaps even past it—if I stood any chance of getting rid of this Elder. That was why I couldn’t afford to be interrupted. I had to try to weaken him again after all the blood I’d fed him since I’d turned into a vampire. I had to try to make him feel a sense of hopelessness—that I might never drink blood again, and would prefer to starve myself to death rather than keep nourishing him.
Nuriya disappeared, and I found myself standing alone in the center of that large room. It felt like I was in possession of a deadly virus. I just had to contain myself. Keep myself away from everyone. And try to stamp it out before I could infect the rest of the world with it.
I walked over to the bookshelf and pulled down an armful of the English titles that I saw stacked there before taking a seat in an armchair. They were novels mostly—old classics. I wasn’t sure where Nuriya had gotten these from—I was surprised that she even read human literature. But whatever the case, I was glad to have books for company.
I looked over the books, wondering which to start with. My eyes fell on Heart of Darkness, by Joseph Conrad. A fitting title. I ended up choosing something else and spent the next few hours reading—or at least, what felt like the next few hours. There was no clock in this place, which I was thankful for. Keeping track of time would only make the experience more agonizing.
If this ended up being successful, and the Elder did decide to leave me, I didn’t know how I would be certain of it without a glass of animal blood to try… I’d never experienced what it was like to be a normal, non-possessed vampire. But I suspected that I would feel the difference in my bones.
But I couldn’t allow myself to get my hopes up too much. So I tried to shut down my mind and immerse myself in the book in my lap.
As time drew on, however, my concentration dimmed, the hunger in my stomach beginning to roar too loudly for me to keep ignoring. It had been less than two days since I’d last tasted blood. I hadn’t even been fasting long. I’d never had reason to starve myself before, but I was sure that humans didn’t feel this much discomfort when fasting from food. It seemed that vampires abstaining from blood was far more painful.
I set my book down on the table beside me and leaned back in the chair. I was about to close my eyes and see if sleep might take me when my vision became oddly shrouded. Looking down at the book, I could barely read the letters in the title. And then, as if I had just closed my eyes, a blackness flooded my brain.
Chapter 7: Ben
Low-hanging branches whipped against my face as I raced through a dark wood. Hunger clawed at my stomach. My mouth was parched. Every muscle in my body felt tired and strained. I didn’t know how much longer I could keep running without sustenance. And yet I couldn’t slow my feet down. It was as though they belonged to someone else and, if anything, my speed only seemed to be increasing.
I need to drink, or I’m going to pass out.
I held my breath as the gushing of a river met my ears. It was close. Very close. A scent pervaded the atmosphere as I neared. A sweet, unearthly scent. My mouth salivated as I raced harder. A clearing came into view, beyond which ran a river. A crimson river. I could barely contain myself as I knelt down on the edge of the bank. I cupped my hands and dipped them into the red liquid. I swallowed a mouthful. It tasted even more divine than it smelt. It glided down my throat like nectar. As I downed gulp after gulp, it felt like it was invigorating every cell in my body. By the time I stood up again, my hunger fully satiated, I felt like a new person. Strong. Invincible. Like I could do anything with these refreshed limbs. Take on a thousand armed hunters, run the circumference of the globe…
A stabbing sensation in my arms brought me to consciousness. There was a disgusting taste in my mouth, nothing like the succulent taste in my dream. My vision came back to me. Frown
ing, I looked down.
My heart skipped a beat.
My arms were pierced with deep, oozing puncture marks. The blood had dripped onto my lap and stained the seat. I reached a hand to my mouth. It felt moist. When I withdrew my fingers, they too were covered with the red substance.
I went to the bathroom and stared at myself in the mirror, my face, body and clothes a bloody mess.
I’ve just been cannibalizing myself.
I bent over the sink and rinsed my mouth out, horrified at the taste of my own blood. Then I stripped off my soiled clothes and turned on the shower. Stepping inside, I washed away the stains from my face, chest, and arms. Now that the blood was rinsed off, I could see exactly what damage I’d done to myself. The scattering of puncture wounds were in the process of healing, though they were taking longer than they should.
I stepped out of the shower and dried myself off. Wrapping a robe around my body, I looked at myself again in the mirror. Now that I was no longer distracted by the blood coating my mouth, I noticed the difference in my eyes. They had become darker. Much darker. There was hardly a tint of green left in them.
Tearing my gaze away, I walked back into the main room. My body felt weaker than ever. The dream that I’d had—imagining myself consuming endless amounts of exquisite blood—only made the reality more unbearable.
My knees unsteady, I stared at the red-stained fabric of the armchair I’d been sitting in.
How can I stop myself from doing that again?
I cast my gaze around the room, looking for anything that I might be able to use to restrain myself. But I couldn’t see anything suitable.
I had no choice but to summon the jinni again.
Nuriya looked strained as she appeared after five minutes, her eyes fixing on the blood.
“I fell into some kind of… daze just now,” I began, before she could utter a word. I was sure that it hadn’t been sleep, because my eyes hadn’t been closed—just fogged over. “I started drinking my own blood. I need you to make sure that doesn’t happen again. Restrain me somehow…”
“Restrain you,” she murmured.
“Maybe even fix me to the wall if you have to,” I said.
“No, no,” she said, shaking her head. “That won’t be necessary. And besides, it would be far too uncomfortable.”
She moved closer to me and cupped my face in her hands. At first I thought this was just her usual irritating, overly-affectionate behavior, and I was about to brush her aside, but from her expression of concentration I realized that she was doing something else. When she let go of me, I raised a hand to my face but found that, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t bring it closer than five inches from my mouth. I tried to raise my forearm and bring it closer, but again, it was impossible. It was as though she had placed an invisible barrier around my head.
This should do the job.
I looked toward her and nodded, grateful for the solution. “Thank you,” I said. “You can leave again now.”
She glanced at the blood and as she did, the stains vanished from the seat, as if they had never been there to begin with. Then, after saying goodbye, she left.
Alone again, I heaved a sigh. Now it was time to wait again. I didn’t attempt to pick up another book—my hunger was far too blinding for me to be able to concentrate. Instead I walked over to the bed and lay down. Maybe, if I could just drift back into unconsciousness, I would be able to pass more time like this. Now that I was no longer able to harm myself with my fangs, this would be the least painful state of existence.
Chapter 8: Ben
By some mercy, I did manage to sleep. I didn’t remember the last time I’d rested properly, and my body was exhausted.
When I woke up, it was with a strange lightness in my head. As I sat up and looked around the room, my vision was sharp and crisp. I stood up, and when I felt a sense of strength in my body, I wondered whether I was just imagining it. I stretched out my arms, examining them. They had healed by now. I wondered how long I’d been asleep.
I walked around the room, allowing the last traces of sleep to leave me. As they did, I became suddenly aware of the absence of the acute hunger that had been plaguing me before. I still felt thirst—but it wasn’t even half as uncomfortable.
I entered the bathroom and splashed my face with cold water. When I glanced up at the mirror, my eyes had returned to their normal vivid green color.
Perhaps more time has passed than it feels like?
I held my breath, unsure of what to think. I wondered whether this was just my wishful thinking carrying me away—making me read signs. I didn’t want to get my hopes up even in the slightest that something might’ve changed.
I left the bathroom and walked back into the main room. I continued pacing up and down, paying close attention to the level of hunger in my stomach and my general state of being. Perhaps this was just the effect of having rested for a long time—my body was rejuvenated, but soon the effect would wear off and the pangs would grow strong and loud again.
I kept pacing the room, waiting for the agony to strike again. But it didn’t. All I felt was the type of hunger that a human might experience—uncomfortable, but not unbearable. Not anywhere near the level I had gotten used to experiencing as a vampire—the type that could make me lose my mind. Or make me start biting into my own flesh…
I still didn’t dare voice my hope inside my head, because reading the signs wrong would only make the disappointment all the more crushing.
But after several hours of monitoring my level of hunger, and paying close attention to the way I was feeling in general, there was a test that I wanted to carry out.
I brushed a hand against the snake’s head on my wrist band and waited for Nuriya to appear. She arrived after a few minutes.
Her eyes widened as she looked me over. “You’re looking better,” she said.
I winced internally at her words, still so tentative about letting myself entertain the idea. I just wanted to focus on the test—which would give us a hard result either way without speculation or false hope.
“I want you to feed me some animal blood,” I said.
Nuriya moved toward the dining area in one corner of the spacious room and turned her back on me. She pulled down a glass and a jug from one of the shelves. When she turned around, the jug that she was holding was filled with red liquid.
She handed me the glass, and then filled it to the top.
“What kind of blood is this?” I asked, raising the glass to my nose so I could sniff it.
“Snake blood,” she replied.
I remembered the last time I’d tried to drink snake blood. I’d gone into the snake room in the upper atrium. I had ended up throwing up all over the floor.
Gingerly, I raised the glass to my lips and took my first sip.
I felt like gagging the moment the liquid entered my mouth. It was so repugnant, so eye-wateringly bitter to my palate after the rich, luxuriant human blood The Oasis had afforded me. I wouldn’t have been surprised if I vomited from the taste alone.
But I managed to hold it down. I downed another gulp, larger this time, holding my nose as I swallowed. And then I took a third gulp. A fourth. A fifth. Until I had finished one and a half glasses of the blood.
I hurried to the bathroom and rinsed my mouth out in an attempt to get rid of the disgusting aftertaste before returning to the main room and sitting down on the edge of the bed.
The jinni was watching me closely. “How are you feeling?” she asked.
I held up a hand, breathing deeply. It was too early for me to say. When I’d last tried to drink blood, it had taken a while for my body to expel it—at least a few minutes. During those minutes I had allowed myself to hope, falsely. I wasn’t about to do that again.
“Ask me again in fifteen minutes,” I said, eyeing her diamond-encrusted wrist watch.
She took a seat on the sofa, opposite from me, and the two of us sat in intense silence. I leaned forward, resting my el
bows against my knees, and closed my eyes, trying to feel what this animal blood was doing to me. I hadn’t vomited by the time Nuriya told me that fifteen minutes had gone by.
I tried to remember how many minutes it had taken for me to throw up before. If I remembered right, it was certainly less than five.
I moved over to the dining table and tipped the blood remaining in the jug into the glass. Slowly, I knocked down the rest of it. Every last drop. And then I waited again for another fifteen minutes.
Despite the taste, I was still showing no signs of expelling the blood.
“I’d like to drink some more,” I said. I wanted to fill myself up with as much blood as I possibly could, so that there could be absolutely no doubt in my mind as to the conclusion of the test.
“Why don’t we return to our kitchen then?” she asked. “You can sit there and drink as much blood as you need, my child.”
I agreed. She made smoke surround us and the next thing I knew, I was standing in the middle of the jinn’s huge kitchen. It was empty now, the fragrance of a recently cooked meal flavoring the air.
She pointed to a table and chair in one of the corners, upon which stood a large round, steel container of blood, a label hanging from its edge. Nuriya reached up to one of the shelves and took down a tall glass. As I took a seat at the table, she set it down in front of me. She squeezed my shoulder. “Drink to your heart’s content, Benjamin.”
“But stay with me,” I said. I wasn’t ready for her to leave just yet.
I began making my way through the vat of liquid—but I only managed three more full glasses. I’d consumed a lot more human blood than that in one go before. I hoped that this was just something normal for vampires in general—they couldn’t hold in as much animal blood as they could human blood—and not specifically a problem with me.
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