In fact, it took almost an hour for the trainee wizard to learn of the train’s arrival. He was finally alerted by a centaur. The centaur had originally been a horse riding instructor. He had made the error of shouting a curse at the trainee wizard when that individuals speeding bike had narrowly missed running into a party of student horse riders. The horses had been spooked and took some time to calm down. The instructor had shouted: “Stupid Halwit!” Taking offence at the rebuke, the trainee wizard had muttered something about cheeky horse types blocking roads. He then hypnotized the riding instructor and put him into a centaur costume. The botJake half of the instructor’s body now appeared to be a horse.
The horses head had vanished. It and was replaced by a human head and torso .
The torso was dressed in a white polo shirt bearing the initials EFA on the chest.
Unfortunately, the centaur was now only able to communicate by neighing. Yet, like many enchanted beings in the PEA,the centaur was intensely loyal to the trainee wizard. To alert the trainee wizard in respect to the train’s arrival, the centaur/instructor ran backwards at full pelt across 40 km of woods and fields. He traveled backwards to avoid losing sight of the train since he had been ordered to watch closely! He was, of course, unable to see the train after covering ½ km but this fact did not register on his hypnotized brain.
On arrival, he charged into the castle courtyard and neighed 3 times.
This was a prearranged signal indicating that the train was in his area of watch.
His immediate reward was a pile of raw carrots from the castle cJakechen.
The trainee wizard was exceedingly pleased when he heard that the train had returned. After some thought, he reached the conclusion that one of his spells had affected robot FIDO. The trainee wizard reasoned that FIDO must have acted as the train driver because the other occupants of the train were all entranced. One of the spells must have forced the robot to reverse the train and return!
“It was almost certainly the old Reverse and Return spell 27!” the trainee wizard, chuckling to himself. chortled. “I must have uttered it while chasing that metal man! I may have fallen into the river, had to swim and then climb out. But this new event actually proves that everything was actually under my power! The robot has been forced to drive the train back here! Even when I seem to lose I actually win!!! How incredibly potent and wonderful I am! Now the metal man has returned and I can deal with him at my leisure. I will also collect the two valuable elves lost by incompetent trolls! And those dwarves who will be good for working in the mine.”
HeThe megalomaniac rubbed his hands together.
He was sitting in a well appointed lounge inside his castle. He had dried off after his unplanned immersion in the river and he was now fully dressed in ceremonial robes, black pants, black boots and a somewhat grey shirt which had not been well laundered. His outfit was completed by a high conical hat emblazoned with stars and moons.
His staff stood nearby, waiting for action.
“I must prepare fully for this encounter!” said the trainee wizard. “This time I will be ready for anything. I will take a full crew of troops!! And finally I will have massive naval might! I will alert ten crocodiles from the lower pool! They may be only half tamed. I have only had one session with Volcano and the crocs but that will do! In any case, Volcano could probably do this job without assistance. But I love to win! I will grind the damned elves and those blue dwarves into dust!”
He stood up and inspected himself in the mirror. “Most impressive!” he said, picking up his staff. He felt inside a pocket and pulled out the glowing stone Volcano He had already used it to hypnotize the elves and dwarves when he made his first visit to the railway train, disguised as a railway ticket inspector.
But now he would not be disguised. He would be resplendent in his full majesty! He moved to his wall safe and removed a box like object covered in knobs and dials. It was a Dopplegang Convertor, a machine he had acquired from the train! The trainee wizard leaned out of the window and pointed the box at five trolls lounging in the courtyard. He pressed a switch. Immediately the five trolls popped out of sight, to be replaced by ten trolls. He repeated the process, generating twenty trolls.
“Should I carry on until I have forty trolls?” said the trainee wizard, speaking to himself. He thought for a moment. “No! I can create more trolls on the battlefield if needed. Twenty trolls is plenty trolls!”
The trainee wizard picked up a megaphone and leaned out of the window.
He bellowed: “Trolls! Draw battle clubs! Report to the helivan!”
He now looked into a polished crystal globe which he used as a communication device. The globe immediately focused on a group of crocodiles in a river. Crocs! It is time for war!” cried the .trainee wizard. “Proceed upstream to where the chuff chuff is standing. Wait there for action!”
Because crocs are not very erudite the trainee wizard used the term “chuff chuff” to describe the steam engine standing at Homewood station.
Carrying the dopplegang converter, the trainee wizard strode to the helivan. It was parked on the castle forecourt. A leprechaun in a pair of filthy overalls stood by the helivan, holding a spanner. The leprechaun pushed to dopplegang comverter into place under the helivan. The crystal comm device went into a recess above the converter. The leprechaun had originally been a garage owner in Coldstream. Unfortunately, as the garage operator he had made a major mistake. He had attempted to charge the trainee wizard for a tire repair on a motorbike.
His attempt had failed.
He had not been paid but he had been enchanted.
He was now a leprechaun. Or to be accurate, he believed at a molecular level that he was a leprechaun. Now he spoke: “May I ask a small favor? Boss, if you let me go home to my missus I will give you anything in my shop plus ten years profits.”
The trainee wizard glowered. He spoke haughtily. “There is nothing that I want from your dingy little shop! You are my slave forever as a result of your cheek in demanding payment for a simple service! You are now aware that you should have asked me to graciously receive your gift offering of a lube! Well, you did not make a gift offering! You demanded money! Appalling! Get back to work!”
The trainee wizard brushed past the leprechaun and clambered up into the drivers seat.
The trolls, each carrying a heavy club studded with nails, had already clambered into the back of the machine and settled on the seats. The dopplegang canverter was now in place, powering the strange machine.
The overhead rotor and the propeller spun into life together.
Alone in the cockpit the trainee wizard reviewed his plans.
He would first shoot a paralyzing spell at the metal man while he was himself still safely in the air. The trainee wizard sJugg himself mentally
He should never worry because he was invincible!
He added: I am a Master Genius!
This invincible master genius then reviewed his plans. He would use a special spell. The metal man would be frozen solid and unable to move. He would stand like a horrible metal statue! He would be under the total command of an invincible master genius trainee wizard! With the mechanical rubbish out of the way the trainee wizard would land his helivan. The dwarves and elves would definitely still be entranced with the deep spell he had used previously. His trolls could then drag out the whole bunch and load them into the helivan, ready for transit to the dungeons! The train had returned to Homewood probably driven by the robot. The train itself could be left for future investigation.
The Master Genius would fly back home with his trophies.
It was a fine plan! Now, the invincible genius was ready! He switched on his intercom. His amplified voice blared out into the compartment behind. “Trolls! This is the moment you have been eagerly awaiting! You will be glorious in battle! Triumph awaits! You are under the command of a Master Genius!!!!”
The trolls roared approval.
The trainee wizard pushed back his rotor control and adjus
ted the throttle. The helivan began to rise. The machine leveled out at about five hundred feet and began to race north towards the waiting train. After a few minutes flying, the trainee wizard spotted a thin plume of smoke from the stationary engine. The helivan stopped its forward passage and hovered. The trainee wizard switched his intercom back on.
“Trolls! Enemy in Sight! Commence battle song!”
The excited trolls thumped the helivan floor and sang:
“Onward trollish army,
Trolls are off to war!
Into blood and battle,
That’s what trolls adore!”
Inside the waiting train the doctor and the dwarves could hear the deep voices of the airborne corps de troll, along with the clatter of the helivan as it prepared to land. “It seems there is now much more than a mere rumor of war!” said the doctor cheerfully. “We may expect him and his cohorts to land outside quite soon. Once I have finished my excellent cup of tea I will greet him!”
CLEO suddenly spoke. “Our Central Power emergency equipment must be retrieved! I have a full inventory list. This renegade has filched many items.Lord Alaric has retrieved two hetero magnets and a long range fogger. But the criminal still has possession of a
crystal comm device, a weather control rod, a Dopplegang Converter and one primary weather control unit . We still have the master button for the weather control rod. The master button will focus the rain whoever uses the weather control rod!”
Dr Tung, “We must get all the Central Power gear back. I already have the button.”
He gestured to the three dwarves. “You three blue boys! When the learner trainee wizard arrives you will have to creep up to his van. It looks vaguely like a helicopter. Get underneath the vehicle and you will find a dopplegang converter, a Central Power anti grav machine that looks like a flat box with flashing lights. It will take two of you to carry it back to this train. The other thing we want is a crystal comm device. It will be near the dopplegang converter. It looks like a round vase made of crystal. It also has flashing lights. One of you can carry that. Bring both objects back to the station and put them in the train. OK?”
The dwarves indicated assent.
Jake X (1) Multiverse Fugitive Page 7
