by Elle Casey
"We're with you, babe!" Spike yelled. "Woop! Woop!" I could swear I felt his ring on my finger grow warm in response.
"We stand with our Mother!" said a familiar, proud voice.
I spun around and found Robin standing in the aisle, his fist over his heart. He executed a perfect bow a moment after he made eye contact with me.
I had to put my hand over my mouth to stop my lips from trembling.
Slowly, everyone in the auditorium stood and followed his lead. Pretty soon the only thing I could see were the tops of fae's heads. They were pledging themselves to me once again, and as always, I felt totally unworthy of their faith and belief in my abilities. But no way in hell was I going to let them down by running out of there like I wanted to. I closed my eyes and imagined Tony in my mind. Tony…what should I do?
And then, suddenly, he was there. The light was already on in my mind, and he was with me. I'd somehow compelled him in there, even though I was wide awake and standing in front of hundreds of fae. And, daaaamn, Tony had some seriously righteous wings.
"Hi, Jayne," he said, smiling serenely. "Nice to see you."
"Oh my god…Tony?!" I threw myself at him, hugging him hard enough to hurt myself. "Are you fucking kidding me?!"
"Miss me?" he asked.
I let him go just long enough to look him in the eye and then hugged him again. "Like you wouldn't believe." I inhaled, hoping to catch a scent of my best friend, but there was nothing there. Nothing, nothing, nothing. Not even laundry soap from his fancy and impossibly white outfit.
He patted me on the back. "You can't keep me here long. I'm very busy right now, and you have fae waiting for you to let them know you're ready to wear the mantel of leadership."
I let him go and stepped back. "Are you friggin kidding me? The mantel of…" I shook my head. "Jesus…you're like fifty years old now or something."
He chuckled. "It's been an illuminating experience ascending to the Overworld, I'll give you that, but I'm still me." His face softened and so did his tone. "A lot of things are going to happen to you Jayne, very soon, that will be difficult for you. Stay strong. Chase is working overtime to keep you safe, and I'm doing what I can to…do my job." He looked over his shoulder.
"Which is…?"
He sighed. "Above your pay grade." He reached his hands out and placed them on my shoulders. "Don't get caught up in the details. Focus on what's important. Your family needs you."
"Do you mean my kids need me, Uncle Tony?" I looked down at my belly, forcing him to look with me.
He leaned down and kissed me on the forehead. "Yes. Your children. Spike. Your fae family. The humans. Be your best self. Let go of your grievances. Let go of your need to understand everything. Focus on the big picture."
I sighed, rolling my eyes. "I know. Love, love, love. All you need is love. Yada yada yada. Ben the golden dragon already told me."
Tony smiled. "I have seen him. He's doing very well."
"That's great. I'll tell the girl he left behind with a broken heart, Theresa. She'll be happy for him."
"Theresa is going to be just fine. Believe me."
"And what about Felicia?" I asked. "I haven't talked to her yet, but when she finds out you're gone forever, she's going to be devastated. She thought for sure you were going to come back."
He nodded. "Yes. She will be sad. But she will learn to move on and she will find love elsewhere."
"But what about you? Don't you miss her? Don't you miss me? Or your dragon, at least?" I looked down at my feet so he wouldn't see the tears gathering in my eyes.
He reached out and lifted my chin with his finger. "I know this will be hard for you to understand, but to miss a person makes no sense. You are all still with me. I am still with you. We are not merely the shell that you call a body. We are what is inside, and what is inside never dies. It may move from one place to another, but it doesn't ever extinguish."
"Yeah, well, your Tony soul is hanging out somewhere else, and I don't get to see him anymore, and I miss him. Sorry if that's too primitive for you to understand, but that's how it is for us mere fae and humans."
He laughed. He actually had the nerve to laugh. "Oh, Jayne. I do miss your sense of humor. Thank you for reminding me of that pleasure."
I rolled my eyes. "I liked you way better when you were seventeen and not seventy thousand years old," I said bitterly.
He walked back two steps. "Send me away. You have things to accomplish before we can meet again."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know the drill. I have a destiny, and I have to go fulfill it or play it out or whatever. Fine. I'll see you in a few thousand years." I rushed up to him and pushed him hard on the chest. "Love ya, Baloney Head Ass!" He went flying out into the ether and disappeared from my mind. And then I opened my eyes and found the entire fae community staring at me.
Was I angry at the angel Tony had become? No. Not really. It made sense that our more ascended selves would be more confident, more serious, more…pure. I wondered for a brief moment if I would ever want to be part of an existence that didn't include the F-word, though…
"Back with us?" Tim asked from my shoulder. "Ready to take on the world?"
"Yeah. As ready as I'm ever going to be, anyway." I took a moment to straighten my cloak.
"That's the spirit!" Tim trilled. "Come on, Lellemental! Let's go be mediocre together!"
I lifted my finger for a high-one and Tim didn't disappoint. I turned my hand to give a wave to my fellow fae. "All right, everyone. Thanks for your support. Let's go do this."
A loud cheer went up and everyone quickly made their way to the doors.
"Where's everyone going?" I asked, mystified at their obvious and well coordinated enthusiasm. Each fae race was gathering into its own group as they headed out the door into the hallway.
"To the meadow," Aidan explained.
"What for?"
He looked at me strangely. "For the first stage of Tim's plan, of course."
"Oh. Yeah. The Big Pixie Plan. Of course." I waited until the other Council members were well ahead of us before I whispered to my roomie. "So… what's that plan again?"
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
I STOOD IN the meadow with Becky on my right and Sam on my left. Naida the siren was next to Becky and Red was next to Sam. We stood in a line, facing Dardennes and Céline. Dardennes was coaching us with Robin at his other side.
"We have eyes on the first target." He looked to Robin for confirmation. Robin was communicating via the green elf network.
Robin nodded his head. "Affirmative, Anton," said the leader of the green elves. "The Prime Minister of the United Kingdom is in the bathroom alone."
"How can they possibly know this?" I asked Tim, who was sitting on my shoulder.
"We have spies everywhere," Tim said. "Where we don't have live fae in place, we have pixie electronics and witch listening spells. Nothing escapes us. Nothing." His voice had taken on a deep timbre. It was almost a little bit scary. Or it would have been, if the fae using it had been bigger than three centimeters tall and not dressed like a metrosexual.
"Are you ready?" Becky asked Naida.
Naida dipped her head once. They took each other's hands…and disappeared.
I nodded sagely at the blank space where they'd been standing. "Looks like things are going well." I figured if I was going to be the leader of all this nonsense, I should probably act like I was paying attention and knew what was going on. I didn't really, but I was going to follow the advice someone had given me once: fake it until you make it. Yeah, buddy.
Fae of every size, race, and tunic color rimmed the edge of the forest where it met the meadow. We'd agreed that having all of them hanging around the meadow might be a bit too intimidating for these world leaders who were used to calling all the shots and commanding armies and such, so they were holding back, staying mostly hidden. It would be just this simple welcoming committee here to greet them once they were delivered.
There was a pop, a
nd then Naida and Becky appeared, holding a man between them. He was wearing a suit and looked really sweaty. They let go of him, and he dropped to the ground in a heap.
Becky took a step away and almost fell too. But then she caught herself and stood straight. "We are ready for the next one," she said to Dardennes, her chin lifted so high it looked like she was trying to get a whiff of his cologne or something.
"Are you sure you're okay?" I asked, noticing her trembling fingers.
Her hands clenched into fists. "Yes. I'm fine." She didn't look at me.
I shrugged. If she wanted to play the badass while all the fae in the entire compound watched, it was fine with me. I understood where she was coming from. We were playing in the big leagues now.
"We will manage our visitor," Dardennes said, gesturing at the man on the ground in the rumpled, three-piece suit. "Go get the next one."
Becky and Naida disappeared once more, and I bent over to help the human get to his feet. His tie was askew and his hair all over the place. He'd probably looked awesome back in London where they'd taken him from, but after traveling through the liquid droplets that make up the humidity in the air with my favorite water sprite and the siren, he was looking preeeettty rough.
"Where am I?" he asked in an accent that reminded me of Garrett, the vampire who'd once drunk my blood and left a black mark on my soul in the process. The human was looking around, mystified, as he finger-combed his heavily gelled or greased hair.
When I responded, he jumped, as if not expecting me to be the one answering. "Welcome to the Green Forest in the land of Ardennes, located in France."
He narrowed his eyes first at me and then at Dardennes. "Did Macron put you up to this?"
Dardennes shook his head slowly. "You have been brought here by the command of the Mother of the fae." He gestured to me and said nothing else.
I was kind of surprised that I was being given all the credit for this awesome plan, but I did my best to keep my expression neutral.
The British guy turned to look at me. His eyes scanned me from head to toe. Then he pointed at me. "Who? Her? This one?" He couldn't have sounded more incredulous if he tried. It kind of chapped my ass, actually.
I stretched myself up to my full five foot four height. "Yes. Me. I am the Mother of the Fae. And you are the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom. You have been brought here by the fae community to participate in a coordinated defensive and offensive maneuver that requires your country's armed forces to effectuate." I had practiced my lines over and over after Tim had fed them to me earlier. This was my official welcoming line. I was pretty sure it was working too, because he looked impressed.
"I do not think so," he said in a haughty tone. "No, madam, I do not think so at all." He flipped his hair back and started walking. Away.
"Where do you think you're going?" I asked, grabbing the edges of my cloak to go after him. "You can't leave."
"I most certainly can, and I most certainly am." He tromped through the meadow grasses like he knew where he was going. Was he planning to walk all the way back to England? Silly Brit.
I stopped and sighed, knowing the entire fae community was watching my every move. They weren't the super judgey type, but still…I couldn't very well run after him like a little kid chasing a parent. That wouldn't look commander-in-chief-like at all.
"Stop!" I said in my most bossy, awesomely scary voice.
"Not stopping!" he yelled back.
I raised my hand. "You won't like what happens if you continue!" This was the only warning this high and mighty turd was going to get from me. I was almost out of patience already, and we still had seven more world leaders to go. This is not good.
"Not afraid," he shouted over his shoulder.
I pulled Fire into me without a second thought. Fire wall, now.
A wall of flames shot up in front of him, forcing him to stop immediately or risk being burned to a crisp. He stumbled back away from it, turning quickly and jogging in our direction, glancing over his shoulder several times in fear on the way. When he realized where he was headed, he veered left.
Fire wall, again. I flicked my hand in the direction he was running, and flames shot up to block him once more.
I walked toward him as he turned to face me.
"What is this? Holograms? Pyrotechnics? You don't frighten me, young lady. I'll have you know that I served ten years in the British Armed Forces, as a member of the British Army. I have faced enemies ten times more dangerous than you could ever hope to be. I rose to the rank of lieutenant in record time and commanded my own platoon of thirty men. I passed two tours in Afghanistan, and I am a proud member of the Labor Party.” He squared his shoulders, lifting his chin, his military bearing on full display. "You. Do. Not. Intimidate. Me…with your silly little tricks and illusions."
I drew both arms up as I stared him down and made my way closer. I busted out my rhyme as I maneuvered to stand in front of him. "Come on fire, let's have some fun…give us a really hot bubble shun." I clapped my hands over my head when I stopped in front of him, and we were immediately encased in a ball of fire. Everything around us disappeared, completely blocked out by the flames crackling and roaring.
"This isn't real," he said, his nostrils flaring with frustration and anger.
I laughed at his bravado. "Oh, it's real, dude. Trust me."
"Dude? Dude? You are an American?"
I shrugged. "I'm fae. Where I came from before that doesn't matter. What matters is that we need your help." I folded my hands at my waist like I'd seen Céline do a million times. It always made her look so serene and in control.
"We? You mean you and the other members of your silly hippy cult?" He snorted. "I hardly think that is going to happen. Return me at once to my residence and face the consequences of your actions in a court of law. This is a criminal offense." He gestured at the fire surrounding him. "Even if it is just an illusion."
I gestured at the flames. "Dude, you're looking at a wall of fire. And don't act like you can't feel that heat, because I can see you sweating. You are locked in a genuine, one hundred percent pure, elemental fire bubble, and you aren't leaving it until you agree to my terms."
The sound of Tim's voice came faintly to my ears. "Jayne! We have more visitors here now! You should probably come out!"
The Prime Minister started to talk, but I cut him off. "Sorry. Can't chat anymore. I have to go." I took a step back, the flames not bothering me a bit.
He tried to do the same, but yelped and jumped back to the center when he felt the flames sizzling his ass.
"Yeah. Better stay put until I come and get you," I said, removing myself completely from the bubble. I turned around to see that Naida and Becky had returned. Finn was leading Becky away from the meadow, and she was leaning heavily on him. Naida was doing her typical float-an-inch-off-the-ground glide maneuver behind them.
A woman lay on the ground staring up at the sky. "Where am I?" she asked in a Boston accent.
"Hey, Madam President!" I said, rushing over to give her a hand. "Nice to meet you. I'm Jayne." I couldn't believe I was actually meeting the President of the United States. She was much smaller in person than she ever looked on the television.
She took my hand and used it to get to her feet, brushing off her skirt and adjusting her hair before she looked me up and down and then took in the crowd standing around her. "I'm not sure I understand."
"Quick version? Okay, here goes…you've been temporarily kidnapped so we can have a mini UN meeting here in our meadow. We are fae, and we have magical powers and shi… stuff…so it would be a lot easier if you would just go along with this and not try to fight me like that Prime Minister guy did." I gestured over at the ball of flames, allowing them to fade just a bit so she could see him stuck inside with his arms wrapped around his waist. Once he realized he could see me again, he lifted a hand as if he wanted to get my attention, but I put the wall back up to full force before turning back to her. "Do you feel me?"
>
She nodded. "Oh, I feel you all right." She slowly grinned. "I always wondered if the fae were real. Fantasy is my favorite genre to read, you know."
"Cool. Me too. Turns out fae are real, and being fae is waaay better than what you've ever read about in a book." I smiled big at her. "Can I trust you to hang out here peacefully and quietly while we wait for the others to arrive?"
She nodded, folding her arms loosely across her chest. "Oh, yes, definitely. I'm looking forward to this. Wouldn't miss it for the world."
I gave Dardennes and Céline a thumbs-up. "Batter up, silver elves. It's your turn. Ride that wind like nobody's business and go get us some world leaders!" I was actually starting to have some fun.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
EIGHT WORLD LEADERS. We actually had eight of the most powerful people in the entire world, with armies of millions at their beck and call, standing in our meadow. It was kind of surreal, actually. What was blowing my mind, though, was the fact that they were acting like a bunch of assholes…except the German one and the American one. They were pretty decent. It might have helped that they were women, a species used to having to go with the flow and pretend not to be scared when people were throwing surprises at them left and right. A woman didn't get into the top position in government without learning how to be a serious badass along the way.
I had a feeling that the British guy would come around eventually too, but he kept getting so freaked out over what I was saying, I had to put him in another fireball time out. It was so annoying when grown adults acted like babies.
"So, are we ready to try this again?" I asked, gesturing at the fireball. It faded to almost nothing before I spoke again. "Mister Prime Minister, have you calmed down enough to come out here and speak with us in a civil tone of voice?" I let the fire wall drop completely.
"Quite right. Quite right. Absolutely. Ready, willing, and able," he said, sweat pouring down his bright red face as he walked over to the group. At that point, he probably would have said anything to get out of the sauna he'd created. It was totally his fault he was still in there. He'd tried to escape three separate times and had the balls to say that I was as mad as a bag of ferrets—an insult I planned to keep for my own repertoire because it was so awesomely descriptive. But he'd also called me an ankle-biting wazzock, and although I wasn't exactly sure what that meant, his tone told me it was nothing good. The whole ankle-biting thing reminded me of gnomes, and who wants to be called one of those dirt-eaters? Definitely not me.
