Rafe watched them cross the porch, go down the steps and continued to watch as Jory carried the child down the path to the dock that was built out onto the lake.
Mesa dreaded his attention returning to her, but it finally did.
“So, we need to talk?” The huskiness was gone from his voice and instead it held an icy chill. “This is a conversation that took a hell of a long time to start, don’t you think?”
She nibbled the inside of her bottom lip, a sure sign that she was nervous. “I didn’t mean it to happen…like this. I wanted to tell you.”
Rafe turned his back on her, his eyes drawn to the two figures sharing the bench built onto the end of the dock. “When were you gonna tell me, Mesa? If Rance hadn’t got hurt, you wouldn’t ever have come home, and you wouldn’t ever have told me, would you?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. What would have been the point?”
“I’m her father, dammit!” Rafe never shouted, but his voice was louder and came out dripping with anger. “You’d have just gone on pretendin’ that I had nothin’ to do with her conception?”
“I figured when she got older, I’d let Jenny tell you and arrange for the two of you to meet.” Her answer sounded defeated and that was pretty much how she was feeling.
“Jenny knows?” His deep voice almost trembled with his tightly restrained anger.
Mesa nodded. “I made her promise not to tell you.”
He swore. He wanted to hit something. His own sister was just as guilty as Mesa! His eyes found the window again and as silence filled the room, he managed to regain control of his temper. That little girl was his child. Accepting that as fact was like a ribbon slowly unfurling and filling him with wonder.
“She knows who I am?” He was still looking toward the dock.
“Yes. She’s seen pictures of you, from when you were in Branson.”
He turned and looked at Mesa finally, and she couldn’t believe that warm brown eyes could look so cold. “I don’t even know her name.”
“Raale, Raale Storm Horse,” she answered weakly.
He stood there awkwardly for a minute before he turned and walked out the back door and followed the path that led to the dock.
Raale and Jory heard the echo of his boots as he strode along the wooden planks of the dock, drawing closer to them with each step. When she couldn’t stand it any longer, the little girl got up on her knees and turned around on the bench to watch him approach, turning her body again to keep her watery eyes on him as his steps carried him around the end of the bench until he stopped in front of her.
He squatted down facing her. “Hey, Raale.” A warm smile tilted the sides of his lips and his eyes sparkled with intense emotion even a child could see.
She smiled back at him shyly. “Hi.”
His eyes roamed over her face in total wonder. Then, when he realized his in-depth scrutiny might be making her nervous, his smile widened into a grin. “You’re the best surprise I’ve ever had.” He reached out and tenderly wiped away the tears that remained on her golden cheeks.
She seemed amazed. “Really?”
“Cross my heart,” Rafe replied. He cut his eyes over to Jory’s face. “I’d like some time with…my daughter, if that’s alright.”
Jory looked down at Raale. “Will you be okay if I go up and sit at the picnic table?”
She nodded and watched as he stood up and walked away. For a long minute, Rafe remained squatting in front of her, but finally he moved into the spot Jory had vacated. He wanted to scoop the child up into his arms, but was afraid he’d scare her, so he forced himself to sit beside her, calmly. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees. “I’m sorry I didn’t know about you, Raale. I’d have…If I’d known, I’d have been to see you before now. A bunch of times.”
“You’re not mad at me ‘cuz I’m your kid?” She’d been so afraid that he wouldn’t want anything to do with her.
He stayed leaned forward, but looked back at her. “I’m definitely not mad at you.”
“How ‘bouts my mom? Are you mad at her?”
Rafe never considered lying to her. He nodded his head. “Yeah, I’m pretty mad at her. She should have told me about you, a long, long time ago.”
Raale nodded her head, her long black braids bobbing over her shoulders, almost as dark as Rafe’s hair. “You don’t like secrets neither?”
He sat up straight, resting his broad shoulders against the back of the bench. “Nope,” he replied, allowing one hand to gently touch the top of her head. “Some secrets are alright, I suppose, but not if keepin’ the secret hurts someone.”
“I’m glad I’m not a secret anymore and I ditn’t wants you sad to be my dad.” She looked down at her fingers clasped into a small fist in her lap.
Rafe rubbed her back gently. “I’m gonna have so much fun bein’ your dad, you’re probably gonna get sick of me.” He stroked one finger across her tight fist.
Raale hands turned and grasped his large hand in her small ones causing Rafe’s throat to tighten with emotion. “I neber had a dad before. It’s….kinda weird. My mom says it’s rude to ask strangers questions, but you’re not a stranger, are you?”
He shook his head negatively as he chuckled. “No, and you can ask me anything you wanna know.”
She gave serious thought to her first query. “Habe you gots any more kids?”
“Nope, you’re the only one. My sister has a couple of children. I’ll take you to meet them one day soon. They’re your cousins.” He wasn’t sure exactly when that would happen, because right now, his sister was right up there with Mesa, at the top of the list of people he was angry at.
“Where do you libe?” She couldn’t stop the questions. It seemed they just bubbled out.
“I live on a ranch not far from here, with Uci. She’s my grandmother, but she’s the one who raised me and my sister after our mom died.”
Her coffee bean eyes darted to the badge clipped to his belt. “My mom said you’re a cop?”
He nodded. “I’m the sheriff. What that means, is instead of workin’ just in town, me and my deputies work all over the whole county.”
“Where’s your sheriff suit?”
“At home. I wasn’t workin’ today, until I got a call to come out here.”
Just for a minute, the shock of suddenly being flung into parenthood hit Rafe like a fist to the gut and he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees again. He looked back at the little girl sitting beside him on the bench. “You and I’ve missed out on a lot, not bein’ together before. We have a lot of catchin’ up to do, don’t we.”
Raale nodded. “I bets it’ll be fun, habing a dad.”
He leaned toward her and bumped her little shoulder gently with his arm. “I’m gonna make sure of that. Can you ride?”
“Ride what?” she asked, her brows arching with interest.
“Horses. Do you know how to ride a horse?”
She shook her head negatively. “Mr. Bob said he’d teach me, but the horses I saw at that barn was huge. I…don’t think I…wants to ride one of dem. Do you habe little horses?”
Rafe chuckled again. “Nope, mine’s huge, too, but how about if I ride my horse and you ride with me? Could you do that?”
She nodded. “I guess. ‘Cause you know how to tell ‘em what to do. I don’t and they might not like habing a kid trying to boss them around.”
“I know we just met, Raale, but I’d like to take you to meet Uci and your cousins, right now. Would you be afraid to go off with me if I promise to bring you back before dark?” He suddenly wanted Uci to meet his child more than anything.
“But Mom wouldn’t go ‘cause you’re mad at her?” she reasoned.
He shrugged. “You wouldn’t like goin’ if she doesn’t go?”
Raale tightened her grip on his hand. “She maybe won’t let me go ‘less she goes, too.”
He nodded. “You might need to let me talk to her alone for a few minutes, but I’m sure she will, if you want to
go with me.”
She nodded a timid smile spreading her small mouth. “You’re my dad. I’m not a’scared to go with you.”
He stood up and keeping her little hand, securely closed in his, they walked up the dock to where Jory sat at the picnic table.
Mesa had watched the whole time from the cabin, her heart racing like crazy, her mind swirling with fears and guilt as Rafe sat and talked with her…their little girl. She knew Rafe was furious with her, but she knew him well enough to know that his heart was already captivated by his child. He had always loved children and he was good with them, so she wasn’t worried about Raale. But she had kept his daughter from him for over five years and that would be hard for him to forgive. She understood his anger.
Then they were walking along the dock, hand in hand, and her heart staggered at the sight. She’d made such a terrible mistake in not letting Rafe know that he was a father! She couldn’t change the past but, for maybe the first time, she wished she had done things differently. Raale turned Rafe’s hand loose and squatted down to look at something in the grass that Jory was showing her as they reached the picnic table where he sat waiting.
Rafe walked on toward the back door alone. His anger at Mesa was almost overpowering. Almost. His excitement and need to be with his little girl helped him rein it in until he could talk to Mesa without losing control. For Raale, he could do this.
Her stomach tightened into knots as he opened the door and walked in. It took him a full minute to gather his thoughts, but when he looked at her, her heart sank. The coldness in his eyes made her feel like she’d been suddenly dunked in a barrel of ice water. He’d never forgive her for what she had done. He must hate her!
“I want to take Raale to meet Uci.” It was a simple enough statement to make and if she wanted to fight about it, he was cocked and ready.
“I’m not sure she’s ready for that. The two of you have just met. She might be…uncomfortable.” She really didn’t want to refuse him, but she had to consider Raale first.
He swore softly. “We talked about it, Mesa. I wouldn’t try to take her anywhere if I thought she’d be afraid but if it’ll make you feel better, you can come, too.”
She looked around. “We’ve just arrived. We haven’t even unpacked.”
He shrugged. That didn’t concern him. Then he had an inspiration. “You can work on that while I have her with me. You won’t need to worry about entertainin’ her. I’ll do it.”
“Rafe, she’s…,” she started hedging.
“She’s my child, Mesa!” he growled. “Don’t make me fight you for her because I’ve already lost the first years of her life! I won’t lose anymore.” He glared at her, his eyes smoldering with anger and challenge.
She sensed a warning in his words. “Is that a threat?”
“You take it however the hell you wanna take it. I don’t give a damn. But I intend to be her father from this day forward. If you thought you’d have a problem with that, then you should have stayed the hell in Branson, Missouri and continued to keep her a secret from me!” Rafe struggled to keep his voice on an even keel. He knew a shouting match would upset Raale and he didn’t want that.
Mesa turned and walked over to the door and called Raale.
Looking up expectantly, the child ran to the door. She looked past her mother at her father’s face and easily recognized the trace of anger she saw there. She looked back at her mom, her dark brows drawing down into a frown. “Did you say no?”
Mesa shook her head. “I just want to make sure you’re alright with this. Do you want to go?”
Raale nodded. “He’s gonna takes me to meet Uci and my cousins and to ride a horsy with me. Isn’t that alright?”
Mesa turned to look at Rafe. “Ride a horse?”
“With me,” he clarified. “There’s a ropin’ at Jenny and Russ’s place. I was over there when I got the call to come here.” When he sensed her beginning objections, he lifted his hands to stop it and managed to keep his voice civil. “I won’t rope anymore today. I’ll keep Raale with me the whole time and I’ll bring her home before dark.”
Mesa looked back at her child whose small face was beaming with hope. “Please, Mom. I’ll be extry special good. I won’t ask too many questions or talk to strangers and I’ll use my bestest, bestest manners. I promise.”
Mesa sighed in defeat. “Let’s go find you some jeans to put on. These slacks you’re wearing would get ruined.” She refused to look at Rafe, but if she had, she’d have recognized the excitement in his eyes.
They had to move the car-seat from the back of Mesa’s SUV in to the passenger side of Rafe’s pick-up. Mesa closely supervised to make sure it was properly positioned, even after Rafe assured her that the entire Sheriff’s Department Staff had received special training to make sure they knew when a child’s safety seat was properly secured.
Jory stood silently beside Mesa as they watched the truck travel down the dirt driveway away from them. “She’ll be fine. You know he’d die before he let anything happen to her. She’s already got him wrapped around her little finger.”
She nodded. “Yeah, I know. It’s just going to be hard having to share her all of a sudden.”
“He’s pretty angry about it, huh?” He lifted one hand and rubbed her shoulders affectionately.
Again she nodded. “He’s furious. It was a mistake not to tell him before she was born. I don’t think he’ll ever forgive me for this. I should have listened to you.”
Jory patted her shoulder. “Oh, I wouldn’t worry about his forgiveness if I were you and Raale isn’t likely to allow him to stay angry long. She likes peace and harmony.”
“I never dreamed I’d come back here to live, but now that I have, I don’t see much chance of peace and harmony in my life in the near future.” She was envisioning fights with her mother on a daily bases and now, having to maintain a relationship with Rafe that looked difficult, to say the least. All she could see in her future was chaos.
“Mesa, everyone makes mistakes in their lives. The most helpful thing one can do is recognize the mistake for what it is and then try to learn from it,” Jory counseled softly. He of all people understood that.
She sighed. “I’m tired of conflict already. Maybe it would have been better to have hired a couple of nurses and a manager for this place and stayed in Branson.”
“And let your mother spend this place into bankruptcy? This is Raale’s heritage. Keep reminding yourself what you’re fighting for.” Jory wrapped his big arms around her for a quick hug before he turned and went into the house.
Chapter 5
Jory knew most people found his and Mesa’s relationship incomprehensible. There were times when he did, too, but he loved her in a way that he’d never loved another human being. He loved her as he would have loved the daughter he’d never had.
During a time in his life when all he looked forward to was his next bottle of booze, he’d heard her voice floating through the falling snow like the voice of an angel. It gripped his heart and drew him and he followed it through the trees until he saw her. It was so cold snowflakes were starting to fall and she sat there in jeans and a light jacket, holding a guitar, singing her heart out, completely unaware of the frigid temperature or anything else around her. The sweet sound of her singing anchored him and all he could do was stand there in the cold and watch and listen. The wind was whipping her long brown hair around, her eyes were closed, her fingers danced over the strings of the musical instrument in her hands, giving life to a simple melody, and the voice floating up from deep inside her melted his heart.
Jory Madison was overwhelmed and as he watched and listened, icy tears escaped his eyes. The song she was singing was about a young man who’d had a fight with his wife and wandered into a bar. He’d ordered a drink of ‘the good stuff,’ and the bartender was telling him what he’d asked for didn’t come in a bottle. It was found in a loving home and wasn’t promised to be there forever, therefore, it should be treasured
and carefully nurtured. In the sweet words she sang, Jory saw his past life. The wife he’d loved, the son they’d been expecting, the fiery car crash that had taken both of them from him, and the overwhelming grief that had led him downhill and into this foggy, numb world of unending drunkenness.
When she stopped singing, Mesa was surprised to discover that she wasn’t alone. She put the guitar aside and walked over to the man kneeling in the brown grass that was quickly disappearing beneath the falling snow. “Hey mister, are you alright?”
Jory shook his head negatively and wiped his tears away. He struggled to his feet again and swayed slightly, his mind still hazy but he didn’t know if it was grief or liquor.
Mesa could smell the alcohol on his breath, but the grief she recognized in his pale blue eyes touched her heart. She took his hand. “Come on, it’s freezing out here. I’ve got a place just across the street from the park where we can get out of the cold. I’ll open a can of soup.”
Jory wasn’t very steady on his feet, but Mesa took him back to the small, two room apartment she’d been lucky enough to find. It wasn’t far from the club that had agreed to let her sing for tips and she knew how lucky she was to have the small apartment and the opportunity to earn money with her singing.
After eating the soup, the warmth from inside and from outside was like a sedative for Jory and he’d gone to sleep on her small couch. Mesa had slipped a pillow beneath his head, removed his shoes, and covered him with the blanket off her bed.
Over the next weeks, she’d helped him through alcohol withdrawal and into an AA meeting and then slowly, one day at a time, into a new life. In return, Jory introduced her to an old business associate who arranged for Mesa’s first recording session.
They celebrated hearing her song on the radio for the first time by treating themselves to hot dogs from a street vender and as she became better known, a now sober Jory, easily stepped into the role of being her manager. Somehow, they each saw the other as the catalyst for the positive changes in their lives and it became a bond stronger than blood. The trust between them had been born when neither had any reason to trust the other, or had anyone else they could trust and because of that, the unlikely friendship was sealed in their hearts. Mesa became the family Jory had needed and he became the family her own had ceased to be.
Sweet Talking Lawman Page 8
