by Quil Carter
And Julian’s.
“Oh fuck… ELISH!”
I looked over to the entrance and saw Nero and Garrett running towards me, Ellis behind them and the sengils terrified in the hallway.
I’m better off dead.
Suddenly I was tackled to the ground, my body slamming face first onto the carpet, knocking all of the air out of my lungs. There was a commotion behind me; they were grabbing my arms, wrenching them back. I felt cuffs slip onto my wrists and click shut.
Then I heard Ellis. I heard Nero. Garrett. All of them shouting their confusion and horror onto the world, arguing and yelling as they pinned me to the ground. The children were crying their fearful bellows, adding further chaos and discord that was drowning the room.
And what of me? What went through my head as they held me down?
Nothing.
There was nothing left inside of me, no spirit left for them to take. Each man had come into my life, had used me, abused me, manipulated me… then finally their crescendo, they had broken me so badly, my mind had shattered into a thousand pieces.
“Put him into the hallway closet,” I heard Silas say. “Close the door and lock it. Garrett, bring me one of my green pills. Ellis, try and retrieve my eyes.”
And I felt myself get yanked to my feet.
I stayed in darkness for many days, in a room that was always called the hallway closet, yet I could tell from the lack of noise outside this room that it was designed to hold a prisoner if needed be. It was soundproof, and not even the usual split of light underneath the door was gifted to me. I saw nothing but the silvers and blues of my night vision, a stacked tower of towels on the wire racks to my left, and some forgotten electronics. There weren’t even any household cleaners so I could kill myself.
As soon as they let me out of here, I’m just going to walk to the balcony and jump off of it. I think I wish to fly far away from here… and if the gods will not grant me flight… they will at least grant me death.
Death is silence, it is quiet, it is final. In death, I won’t feel this dark hole where my heart had been, this physical pain that is making my body shake. In death, they cannot find me, and if I can stay hidden forever, they never will.
There’s no coming back from this… not this one. What bridges weren’t burned in front of me, were ones I myself torched. The family was safer without me, and I would be happier without them.
Eventually a blinding light filled the room. How long had it been? I didn’t know, I just knew the day had long past where I cared.
My eyes squinted as I tried to look up. I saw in the doorway a silhouette, one that walked up to me and grabbed underneath my arm.
I recognized those arms. Nero. Nero was lifting me up. “Come on, bro,” he whispered. I was surprised to hear no hostility in his voice, only sadness. “Can you walk?”
My eyes squinted as they tried to adjust to the light. I was still being walked, led out into the living room.
I closed my eyes tight and opened them, then I saw, his body distorted by the painful light, Silas staring back at me. His immortality had healed him completely, and the king now stood with a sneer on his face like he was smelling something awful.
“Take him to Liam’s,” Silas said quietly. “Pick him up.”
“Liam’s?” Nero stammered. Around me I heard Finn call my name. I began looking for him. I wanted to talk to him. I had to apologize.
I was supposed to be there for him. A terrible thing had happened to him and it was my job to protect him. Everything else might be unsure and my life may be a ruin… but that had never changed.
“Elish!” Finn was suddenly there. He grabbed my shoulder and shook it. “Snap out of it. Please… please, Master.”
His eyes shot to Silas and he visibly shrunk back, Nero continued walking and Finn was soon out of sight. I felt his hand slip from my shoulder.
I’m sorry, Finn. I’ll make it up to you.
Nero took me in the elevator to Liam’s floor. Silas was right beside him, glaring down at me with a hate I knew all too well. I had no reaction to that. I’d been feeling his hatred towards me for quite a while now; the feeling had been mutual too.
Now I just didn’t care.
“Will you kill me this time?” I said to him dully.
The king’s new eyes seared me like I’d laid my hand upon a stove. Something he’d also done to me before, almost a year ago.
But it was Nero that spoke. He sniffed, and tightened his arms around me. “Don’t say that, bro bro,” he choked. “I know it’s bad now… but every day will be a bit better.”
“There is no daybreak where I am, brother,” I whispered. “Just perpetual darkness to which I cannot escape.”
Nero sniffed again, and when he spoke his voice was breaking to pieces. “It won’t be like that forever… we… we’ll all help you find a new boyfriend. I got… I got some friends you might… you might…” I felt a tear drop land on my bare chest. I watched it slide down my skin, leaving a glassy trail behind.
The elevator halted and the doors opened. Silas swept past me, his flowing black robes swaying as he marched down the hallway. I realized as I watched him, that he was dressed in black. From head to toe, Silas was wearing something…
… more suited for a funeral.
Was I to get my wish then? Would I be laid on a table and given the injection of pink liquid like some pet who’d refused to be trained? Or was there a hidden sympathetic bone in that stone-cold body?
“I love you,” Nero whispered. And I realized something else too.
Nero’s heart was wildly thrashing. My brother was scared.
“What’s he going to do?” I asked, my tone still dull and listless.
“I don’t know…” Nero sniffed. “But I’ve never seen him like this before.”
He stepped out of the elevator and walked with me down the hallway. But he didn’t lead me through the double doors to the main clinic, instead he turned to a single door on the left, this one always closed and locked.
Now the door was open, and as Nero approached, I heard Silas inside talking in subdued, yet still cold, tones, to an unnamed man.
And when Nero turned into the room, I saw that the man was not Liam.
It was Perish.
And this was… a surgery room.
The first flickers of apprehension sparked inside of my body as I looked around the room. It was painted white, with a surgical table in the middle that smelled new and unused. There were whirring machines surrounding this table, some I recognized some I didn’t. And even the ones that looked familiar to me seemed to have been altered in some way or another.
There were surgical trays full of tools as well… scalpels, needles, scrapers, sutures…
And a bone saw.
“What are you going to do…?” I whispered, the sparked apprehension now breeding full blown panic. My breath began to catch in my throat. “Silas… what are you going to do?”
“Nero, you may leave,” Silas said placidly. He was turning the dial on a small device set on a metal table with wheels. “Place him on the table. I believe you still need to prepare the plane for our dear Julian’s permanent departure.”
Julian’s departure?
He was going to kill him. Nero was going to kill Julian.
Nero squeezed me tighter. I looked up at my brother and saw his indigo eyes wide with fear, and his usually menacing look gone and replaced with consternation. “Master…” he said in a small voice. “What are you gonna do to him?” He held me tightly to his chest, and I was ashamed to admit to myself that I felt guarded in his arms. I felt, even if fleeting, valued and protected.
My world may be ending, but my chimera siblings will survive even the harshest of apocalypses.
“I gave you an order, Nero,” Silas said flatly. He turned from the machine and glared at my brother as he walked past us, towards Perish who was washing his hands in the surgical room’s sink. “You can either disobey me, and you can join him. Or
you can place Elish on that table.”
Nero protects me when he can. And I will protect him as well.
“Listen to him,” I said to my brother. His face crumpled at my words. “You know he’ll get his way no matter how much you resist him. Knowing I got you hurt will only make it worse on me.”
Nero made a whimpering noise in this throat, but that was followed by a nod. Obediently, and to my relief, Nero walked me to the surgery table and set me down.
“I love you,” Nero croaked.
“I said leave him, Nero!” Silas snapped. “Turn and leave.”
“I love you too,” I said back. The bravery on my face only for show. I was terrified, purely terrified, but I didn’t want my little brother to see me scared. I knew he’d seen me scared many times, but there was something about today… I wanted to make this as easy on him as I could.
Nero left the room, his shoulders slumped and his head hung low. I saw more tears fall from his face, these ones landing on the linoleum floor, and then he was gone.
And Perish closed the door. I watched the scientist turn around, his eyes showing the crazed glint that was now a part of him, and he walked to a flat panel computer monitor and began clicking around and typing in information.
I remember when Perish was strong. I remember when his eyes showed strength and will. Perish had once been an incredible man, taking a private jet all around the world and returning with rarities that would’ve been destroyed by time if it wasn’t for him. Now that I was older, I admired that man. I wished I could’ve helped him, instead of having to wait like Joel had said. It killed me inside that Silas had broken him, had broken his mind for being…
My insides turned cold, before freezing completely to ice.
I know why I’m here.
He’s going to do the same surgery on me that he’d done on Perish.
He was going to force me to be obedient towards him. Silas was going to alter my fucking mind.
Panic flooded me. I jumped off of the table, and with my heart thrashing from terror, I made a break for the door.
But Silas was waiting for me. Whether it was the spike in my heartbeat, or perhaps he’d been waiting for me to put the pieces together, I didn’t know. All I knew was that my limbs suddenly froze in their places, my arm outstretched towards the door and my legs mid-run, and with a scream of despair, I fell to the ground.
“Don’t do this!” I screamed, the terror tainting every brave bone I had remaining. I didn’t want to become like Perish. I didn’t want to become a robot with no life of my own. “Don’t do this to me!” I began to sob, struggling to make my arms and legs work so I could get off of the floor. “You’ve done enough. Haven’t you done enough?”
“Haven’t I done enough?” he repeated behind me, his voice the coldest I had ever heard it. “Why yes, Elias. I have done enough.” He grabbed me by my hair and wrenched me backwards. I sobbed, struggled to rise to my feet, but ended up falling to my knees.
Silas shoved my head forward, and I saw his lower half walk to the front of me.
Then he tsked, and a cold cadaverous hand stroked my cheek. “You know, little love…” I pulled my head away, my face tight, and shut my eyes as he wiped the tears from my eyes. “All these years of trying to make you love me… all these nights I cried in my bed because I knew you hated me… You see, love, I always thought that it was me who was the problem. I blamed my own faults for pushing you away.” He shoved something into my arms. I looked down and saw that it was Tangerine, my stuffed cat from my youth.
The one I’d thrown away last year in a fit of frustration and rage towards Silas.
“But when I was screaming at you to stop raping me in front of your infant brothers… I realized something.” He grasped my chin and wrenched it up, forcing me to look at those pitch black eyes. “It’s you… not me. The problem lies with you.”
He looked over at Perish and smiled. “Are we almost ready, my love?”
“I have the code all written out…” Perish said.
The code?
“I just need him on the table…”
“NO!” I screamed. I jumped to my feet and tried to push Silas aside. But the king only grabbed me, and a second later, Perish grabbed me as well. They dragged me towards the table, my legs thrashing and kicking, my arms trying to wrench my body free. When I realized they were overpowering me, I screamed for the only man I knew may be listening: Nero.
But he didn’t come. I was slammed onto the surgical table, and even though I fought them, eventually, one by one, they secured my arms and legs into Velcro straps.
“Silas… don’t do this to me!” I screamed. The table was anchored into the floor, no matter how much I thrashed myself back and forth, I couldn’t move it. “Just kill me. JUST KILL ME!” Silas appeared above me, the demon king looking falsely angelic in the bright lights. He was holding a buzzing device, hair clippers. He brought them to my head and began shaving off my hair. “If you kill me… you can make another one of me. You can do it right this time. You can raise him right and he’ll be what you want!” I begged. Perish appeared as Silas shaved off strips of my blond hair; he was holding a needle in his hand.
“Please… Silas… kill me. Please, just fucking kill me!” I screamed. I’d never felt this much terror, and it was pure terror, with nothing else to taint its toxic feeling.
“Master…” I cried, my lungs now hyperventilating and my brain launching me headfirst into what I knew would be the worst panic attack I’d ever experienced. “I’m sorry. Master, I’m sorry. I’M SORRY!” My breathing became ragged and wheezing gasps, and I soon found myself unable to even beg for my own mind.
As soon as Perish stuck the heart monitor onto my chest, the machine began to immediately beep loudly and quickly. He silenced it moments later, but I could see out of the corner of my eye, my own heart go insane with anxiety.
This is it.
This is it.
My last conscious thought as Elish Dekker.
What do I say? What can I say?
The light around me began to dim, my breathing was fading like the last moments before a movie ended. And while I inhaled shallow rasps, Perish put a mask over my face.
And as the doctor, Silas’s first victim of this surgery, stared down at me, the mask pressed firmly against my mouth, I saw something in his eyes.
It was him…
Uncle Perish.
“I’m sorry,” he mouthed to me.
There was nothing after that but darkness.
End of Garden of Spiders Volume 1 of 2.
