by B. B. Hamel
“So,” Reid says, and I know it’s time to have the conversation I really want to avoid. “What did you want to talk about?”
I look back at him with a sigh. “It’s important, but you’re not going to like it.”
“I figured. Why else drag me to this shithole if it was good news?”
I fidget with my glass. “I found something out recently. Something that sort of… changes things for me.”
“What is it?”
“I have a son.”
He pauses, clearly surprised. “Are you serious?”
“I’m serious,” I say. “I met her three years ago, had a one-night stand, and now…”
“It’s that lawyer girl, isn’t it?” He stares at me, eyes wide. “She’s pregnant?”
“She was pregnant,” I say. “But she didn’t tell me about him until recently.”
“Oh shit.” He shakes his head. “That’s really heavy, man. What are you going to do?”
“I’m going to step up and get to know him,” I say. “And maybe even raise him, if she’ll let me.”
“Wow.” He takes a long drink. “The lifelong bachelor Declan Jones is finally settling down.”
I grin at him. “All it took was one baby out of wedlock.”
“That you know of,” he points out.
“Let’s hope Felix is the only one.”
“That’s his name, Felix?”
“Yeah. He’s a cute kid.”
“Got a picture?”
I shake my head. “I don’t. But I’ll introduce you sometime.”
“Good.” He laughs a little bit, still clearly taken aback. “You have a fucking son.”
“I have a fucking son.”
We sit in silence together for a second, sipping our drinks in silence. I suddenly realize how perfect this venue is for this conversation. In a lot of ways, this bar is an emblem of my old life, back when I was young and just starting out. It’s fitting that this place should be the spot where I put that life behind me.
Because it’s time to grow up. Oh sure, I’m a fucking grown ass man, but my responsibilities have only ever been for myself. I’ve never had to worry about other people, worry about taking care of a child, anything like that. I’ve never had to be a family man before, and now that’s going to change.
It’s time to let go of childish things.
“How are things with the mom?” he asks me.
“Things are good with her.”
“She’s the cute lawyer, right?”
“Right.” I finish my drink and put the glass back down on the bar. “Actually, that’s what I want to talk to you about.”
He frowns a little bit. “What, the case?”
I turn toward him, summoning all of my nerve. I keep a straight face, meeting his gaze. “I want you to drop it.”
He smiles a little. “Seriously?”
“Really,” I say. “I mean it. Teagan’s boss found out about our relationship and he’s threatening to fire her over this. I can’t be responsible for that, but I can’t risk losing her. This is the only solution that makes sense to me.”
Reid’s quiet for a second, staring at his beer. He runs his fingers along the condensation, drawing little circles on the glass before sighing.
“You really care about her, don’t you?”
“I do,” I say softly.
“Enough to make me give something up?”
“Yes,” I say seriously. “But not without giving you something in return.”
He looks at me, eyes narrows. “What?”
“Ten percent of my owner’s stake.”
He stares me down without saying a word. The whole room feels like it goes still and quiet, like everyone’s listening to what we’re saying.
“Do you know what that would mean?” he asks me.
“I know,” I say.
“I’d be the majority owner,” he continues. “I’d have all the power. The company would essentially be mine.”
“That’s right,” I say. “I’ll give it to you. If you give this to me.”
He leans forward over the bar and sips his beer, not saying anything.
I know he understands how hard this is for me. We built this together and he cares about this company as much as I do.
“I’m not saying I want to quit,” I say softly. “I want to be involved.”
“Of course,” he says.
“You give up this project, and I’ll give up my equal partnership. One project for a future of unlimited projects, all based on what you want.”
I can see the wheels working in his mind. I hate this, I hate giving this up, but I don’t see any other choice.
I need him to say yes, and I can’t ask that of him without giving him something in return. This is more than fair. I’ll still be a large share holder, one of the largest owners, but he’ll have the majority. His word will matter more than mine. I can still do my job, but it won’t ever be the same.
And that’s for the best. I made my decision when I walked into this bar. I’m putting my old life behind me. I’m not going to travel all the time, work long hours, put my heart and soul into this company. I’m going to have a family.
“Are you sure about this?” he says finally.
“I’m sure,” I answer. “Reid, you’ll do a great job. I have total faith in you. But for me, it’s time to step aside. I want this family, and I want to do it for real. So I’m giving it all to you.”
He turns to me, his face serious. “I have to ask again. Are you sure?”
I meet his gaze. “I’m sure.”
He extends his hand. I grasp it and we shake.
“Just like the old days,” he says, grinning. “Another deal struck in this bar.”
We release our hands and I order another round for the both of us.
“Congrats, Reid,” I say to him. “You deserve it. You’re going to be great.”
“Thanks. And listen, you have a place for as long as you want it.”
“Good. I don’t plan on going anywhere. But I might be working fewer hours.”
He laughs. “We’ll see. You’ll have to clear it with your boss first.”
I laugh and we get our drinks, toasting one more time. After that, we start talking about the old days, reminiscing and reliving our glory days.
Though for me, my glory days are ahead of me. When I leave the bar a few hours later, a little drunk, I’m glowing with joy. Reid’s going to drop this case, and I can be with Teagan without any issues. We’re going to be free and clear. She’s going to be mine, for real.
As for Felix, well, I’m going to have to work on that. He’s my son and I have a lot of time to make up for. I’m going to get started as soon as I can.
I get into my car, and as it pulls out into traffic, I don’t look back. I’m leaving behind my old life. And I’m embracing the new.
26
Teagan
I feel like everyone’s staring at me as soon as I walk into the office.
I don’t know if word’s out about my relationship with Declan. Maybe it’s just all in my head. But I feel like there are eyes on me at al times, judging stares, mocking me for my choices.
And I hate it. I hate feeling like I don’t belong here anymore. I hate Sara for what she did and I hate Jerry for making me choose. This whole thing is a fucking mess, and I despise every second of it.
I get into my office and shut the door. The feeling gets better, but it doesn’t go away. I still feel like a pariah, like an outsider.
All because my friend betrayed me.
I’m glad I went to Declan last night. I needed what he gave me, that intense release and pleasure. I’m slowly learning more about his world, I’m submitting to him the best I can. He’s my Daddy and I don’t plan on changing that, not for anyone.
Because he’s also Felix’s father. If I can make it work with my son’s dad then that would be the best case scenario. I have a chance at a real family, and I don’t want to mess that up. I can’t sacr
ifice it, not even for a job that I truly love.
Still, I’m not entirely sure this is what Declan wants. I mean, he clearly wants me, but I don’t know if he wants Felix. He needs to want to be a father if this is really going to work out. He has to want to be in a family, but we haven’t really discussed it. I don’t know what his long-term plans are for any of this.
I sit at my desk, feeling both numb and angry at the same time. It’s an odd, swirling feeling, and I just want to flip my desk over and scream.
Just as I open up my email to start working, there’s a knock at my door. Sara steps inside before I can respond.
“What are you doing here?” I ask her.
“Hold on, before you say anything Teagan, just listen.” She holds up her hands placatingly.
“Why would I listen to you, Sara? You fucking betrayed me.”
“I had to do it. You were jeopardizing this case. You know we’re losing, right?”
I stare at her and I wish I could spit venom in her eyes. “I know,” I say. “But that’s not because of me. That’s because Declan’s partner is dumping tons of money into lawyers.”
“Maybe,” she says. “But you could be doing more. You could make this all go away, and you’re just not.”
“That’s not how this works,” I hiss. “You don’t just sleep with someone and then get them to drop a case. That’s not the kind of person I am.”
“I guess not,” she says. “But it’s unethical of you to be with him. I had to tell Jerry.”
“You’re a fucking bitch,” I say to her.
She looks a little hurt. “Yeah, I guess I expected that.”
“No, listen. We’re done, you and me. We’re not friends anymore. How could I ever trust you again? Jerry might fire me over this. He’s making me choose between the father of my son and this place.”
She sighs. “I didn’t know he’d go that far.”
“Well, he did, and it’s your fault. I could have had a job I love and the man I want. I need to make it work with him if I can, you know? For Felix’s sake, at least, but also for my own.”
Sara sighs, looking deflated. “You really care about him, don’t you? It’s not just some fun fling?”
“No, it’s not just a fling for me. I really care about him.”
“I’m sorry, Teagan,” she says. “I didn’t know it was so serious.”
“It doesn’t matter. You made your choice.” I cross my arms and lean back in my chair. “Now kindly go fuck yourself somewhere else, please.”
She nods. “Okay. Fine. But there’s a meeting in the conference room. Your man just stormed in here with his lawyer team and demanded a meeting with Jerry.”
That takes me off guard. “Declan’s here?”
She nods. “He’s in the conference room right now, talking with Jerry.”
I stand up, heart pounding. “I didn’t know about this.”
“Yeah, well, we should go.”
“Fine.” I hesitate. “But you’re still dead to me.”
“Fine.”
We walk out of the office. I don’t even want to walk next to her, so I hurry ahead. I don’t know what’s going on, why Declan would come here like this. I’m terrified he’s going after Jerry. I should never have told him that Jerry threatened to fire me, and now he might be making it worse.
I burst into the conference room, practically out of breath. Declan looks up and smiles at me. The lawyers that have been a pain in my ass all look particularly dour and angry, and Jerry just looks completely bemused.
“Hi, Teagan,” Declan says. “Glad you could join us.”
I step into the room with Sara on my heels. “What’s going on?”
Jerry looks back at me. “Mr. Jones here was just telling me that he has an alternative solution to our lawsuit issue.”
I blink, surprised. “He does?”
“I do,” Declan says. “Sit down.”
I walk over to the table and sit across from him. Sara takes a seat next to Jerry.
“Is that Sara?” Declan asks me.
I nod. “Yeah, that’s her.”
He looks at Jerry. “Before we continue, I want her taken off this case.”
Jerry’s eyes narrow. “You don’t have authority to tell me who I get to keep on my staff.”
“True, but you know what I’m offering.”
Jerry hesitates then turns to Sara. “Sorry, Sara, you need to go.”
She looks surprised. “Wait, what?”
“Please,” he says. “You’re off this case.”
“After all the work I put in?” I can see the anger rising, and I love it. “You’re throwing me out?”
“Don’t make a scene,” Jerry warns.
“That’s right, he might fire you,” Declan adds, clearly enjoying himself.
Sara glares at the room before standing and leaving. She moves stiffly, trying to control herself, but I can see the rage in her eyes as she glances at me one last time before the door shuts behind her.
“There,” Jerry says. “Done.”
Declan nods at him. “Thank you.”
“Can I ask what’s going on?”
Declan’s lawyers are all staring at the table, looking uncomfortable and angry. I don’t know what Declan’s doing or why they’d be acting like this, but I have a strange feeling it’s about me.
“I’m ending this nonsense,” Declan says. “My proposal is simple. Your firm drops the suit, and we develop the land into a public park.”
I stare at him before bursting out with laughter. “Are you kidding me, Declan?”
“Nope,” he says, grinning at me. “Not at all. I mean, there are details to be worked out, which is why I brought these clowns.” He gestures at the lawyers. “But that’s the gist of it. Public park, land gets preserved, no more suit.”
“This is very unusual,” Jerry says, looking uncomfortable.
“Well, Jerry, you put me in a bad position. You see, I’m in love with this woman, and you threatened to fire her.” Jerry tries to speak up but Declan talks over him. “So you forced my hand, and now here we are. I’m giving you what you want, and I’m getting what I want.”
“Our internal conversations are none of your—“ Jerry says but Declan cuts him off.
“Save it,” he says. “Just promise Teagan can keep her job and you can count this whole thing as a victory. Imagine how it’s going to play out for your donors. You guys are going to make a killing off this for a long, long time.”
Jerry leans back in his chair, silently considering it.
“Teagan can keep her job,” he promises. “She’s a wonderful lawyer, to be honest.”
“I know that.” Declan says.
“Thanks,” I say, still trying to process what Declan said a minute ago. “But uhm, Declan. Did you just say… that you love me?”
He nods. “I do, very much. I want to be in your life. And Felix’s life.”
“Oh,” I say, not sure what else.
He looks at Jerry. “Do we have a deal?”
Jerry nods. “Deal.”
“Good.” Declan looks at his lawyers. “You guys discuss this and make it official. Show me and Teagan here whatever paperwork you guys end up with. Understood?”
The head lawyer nods. Declan stands up.
“Teagan, a word?”
He walks around the table and toward the door. I get up stiffly and follow him out toward my office. We step inside and he shuts the door behind him.
“Did you really mean—“ I say, but he stops me with a kiss.
It’s long and slow and hungry and I kiss him back, surprised at my own starvation for him. I love the taste of his tongue against mine, his hard body pulling me against him, the warmth of him radiating down me. I don’t understand what happened back there, or how any of this is happening, or what any of it means, but I don’t care.
I have his kiss. That’s what I need.
We slowly break apart. “I mean it,” he says softly.
“I l
ove you too.” The words come spilling out. “I don’t know why you did that back there, and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, you know, with Felix.” I’m rambling and I feel so flushed and excited and strange.
“Stop,” he says softly. “It’s okay. I want to know Felix. I want to be his father.”
“You do?”
He smiles. “I do. I want to do it with you.”
“You do?”
He grins and kisses me again, slower and softer.
“I do.”
I pull him against me and let him hug me close. “How did you make this happen?” I ask him softly.
He tells me about his deal with Reid. It horrifies me, but he quickly calms me down. “It’s what I want,” he says. “I didn’t know it, but I’ve been wanting this for a long time. A family sounds so much better than my company. I’ve had that life. I want this one now.”
“I can’t ask you to do that for me.”
“You didn’t. It’s already done.”
“Declan. I don’t know. I’m afraid…”
“Don’t be.” He takes my hands between his. “This is what I want. If you’ll have me.”
“Of course I will.”
He kisses me again, and I know it’s going to be okay.
27
Teagan
Two Years Later
“Yeah, there you go!” Declan laughs as Felix jumps into his arms. “Good job, bud.”
I watch from the bench as Declan and Felix climb back up to the top of the slide. Felix says something, insistently pointing at the slide. Declan shakes his head, but Felix won’t let up.
With a bashful look in my direction, Declan gets to the top of the slide and takes his turn. Felix cheers for Declan and then rides down after him, the two of them laughing, Declan clearly a little embarrassed to ride the slide in public.
Marta comes up to him and says something before taking Felix’s hand. She takes him to the swings and a grateful-looking Declan comes over and sits beside me.
“Feeling tired, Dad?”
He grins at me. “I guess I’m getting old.” He leans over and kisses my cheek. “Plus, it’s Daddy to you.”
