She would be heartsick if that ever happened to Kalino, and part of her was silently rejoicing at the evidence in front of her to the contrary. Kalino was barely nineteen, and other than growing in stature and the deepening of his voice, he seemed much the same as before. Before he’d lost his best friend and her world had come crashing down about her ears. Kevin would have been the same. If only…
It was as if Kalino had picked up her train of thought. He searched her eyes for a moment before turning to Kaillar and shaking his head. “No. A close second. Kevin was the best,” he murmured to her softly.
Becca looked at him sadly and shook her head, “Please. Don’t go there. This is hard enough.”
Kalino sighed in frustration, “You leaving was hard.” Becca merely shrugged, as if her agreement mattered not. “Look, why don’t you all grab your luggage and meet me at the charter desk in half an hour? I’ll go file a new flight plan, and we’ll head out right after that.”
“Thank you.”
“Don’t mention it.” He looked at her companion, and Becca realized she’d yet to make any introductions.
“Sorry,” she mumbled to both men. “Kalino, this is Kaillar Donnelly. Kai, this is Kalino. He was a friend of my brother’s.”
Kalino gave her a strange look, which she ignored. He’d been more like a brother to her growing up, and something told her he could be again, if she could just get past her own guilt.
“Nice to meet you.” Kaillar shook his hand, and then placed a gentle hand on her lower back, “We really appreciate your offer of a ride. This has been hard on her, and anything you can do to make things easier is welcome and appreciated.”
“A`ole pilikia. See you both soon.” Kalino strode off, and Becca released a breath she hadn’t even known she was holding. She’d known that she would see people from her past, but seeing he brother’s best friend right off the bat had been more than merely hard. Guess you no longer have to wonder if seeing people you once knew was going to send you running off.
Becca glanced at Kaillar, and then interpreted for him, “He just told us not to worry, and that’s all.”
Kaillar nodded his head, and then directed her with light pressure on her back towards the sign indicating the baggage claim was still ahead of them. They had to navigate several large groups of people who seemed to be enthralled with the airport, wanting to document their arrival in Hawaii with photos from every angle.
Becca wished that she could tell them they needed to step outside if they truly wanted to experience their first moment in Hawaii, but then again, that would require interacting with strangers. Something she rarely did unless forced to.
“So, I didn’t know you have a brother,” Kaillar offered once they were moving toward the baggage claim again.
Becca nodded once, “Yeah. I did have a brother.”
“Had? What happened?” he wondered aloud.
“He died. Can we change the subject?” she asked through tightly clenched lips.
“Sure.” Kaillar watched her for a moment, knowing that whatever she was hiding more than likely wasn’t going to stay hidden while she was here. How could it? The past always had a way of catching up with you and forcing you to deal with it. The only question that remained was whether you would choose the how and when, or find yourself being thrown into the chaos, struggling to find an anchor to hold on to.
Kaillar hoped for Becca’s sake that she took control of the situation and dealt with her past on her terms when she was ready and strong enough to deal with them. When she was strong enough to handle whatever the past might entail. Whatever the case may be, Kaillar mentally promised her to stay by her side and provide whatever support she needed in the coming days. It was what he wanted to do. Help her.
Chapter 5
He was prevented from thinking more about the subject as the baggage carousel starting moving and their bags appeared a few moments later. “Now where do we go?”
Becca relaxed a bit, acknowledging that he was willing to stop his questioning for the moment. “This way.”
“So, how long of a flight is it over to the Big Island?”
“Not long. Kalino and his family operate a charter service, so their planes aren’t commercial grade nor do they carry many passengers. When I left, their largest plane could only carry up to ten passengers.”
“Must have been nice to know someone growing up who could shuttle you around to the various islands. Did you do that often?”
Becca nodded her head, “All the time. Kalino’s dad was always offering to let us kids tag along.”
“So which of the islands is your favorite?” Kaillar asked.
Becca smiled, “That’s easy. Molokai.” She smiled as she remembered the island’s many valleys and waterfalls. It was a beautiful island, the hillsides brilliant green as they rose up from the ocean’s floor.
“Maybe we’ll have time for you to show it to me before we go home?” Kai suggested, liking the smile that had flitted over her face for just a moment.
Becca nodded her head, “Maybe. That might be fun.” Molokai only held good memories for her, so a trip there would be most welcome.
They took the escalator back up, and she led them through the various shops hawking their souvenirs to the unsuspecting tourists who had waited too long to pick up that last memento of their time on the islands. They would pay almost double the cost for t-shirts, sweatshirts, and postcards, but they would smile while doing it, and everyone would be happy.
“Tourism is big here,” Kaillar commented, having noticed the plethora of shops himself.
Becca nodded, “Yeah, it doesn’t seem to have improved any while I was away. The Big Island is slightly better, unless you are in the larger areas of the city or the commercial beaches.”
“Commercial beaches?” Kaillar asked. He’d been to California a time or two, but the beaches there mostly belonged to the State of California and were managed like State Parks.
“There are quite a number of private beaches in Hawaii. It’s possible to not only purchase the dry land, but a large portion of the ocean front. In addition, you have different types of beaches here. There are the traditional white sand beaches, but also some gorgeous black sand ones as well.”
“Black sand beaches? Never heard of such a thing.” He directed them towards a small coffee shop, continuing their conversation while they waited in line. “What makes the sand black?”
Becca smiled, “It’s not really sand, not like you would typically define it. Rather, its cooled lava that has been weathered by the waves until it has been broken down into small particles that cover up the beach. There are good things and bad things about those beaches.”
“What’s the good?”
“The black sand particles are larger, and don’t tend to stick to everything quite as readily.”
“That sounds like a good thing, although I don’t imagine building sand castles works well.”
Becca laughed softly, “Not at all, as a matter of fact.”
“What’s the bad?”
“The bad comes when you go into the water. The icy cold water. It tends to numb one’s feet up, so they don’t immediately realize their treading upon very sharp, very ragged cooled lava. The farther out one goes, the less weathered the ocean floor becomes. It’s like walking around on shards of broken glass.
“Most people don’t realize what’s happening to their bare feet until they return to the beach and as their body temperature returns to normal, so does their blood flow. They find themselves on the beach with stinging, hurting feet that are bloody and covered in small cuts and punctures.”
“Ouch! Why don’t they warn people?”
“Oh, they do. Most of those beaches have signs advising people to not enter the water without water shoes on their feet or dive socks in place. But tourists tend to think they know best and many of them don’t come prepared. The worst part is after they go back home to wherever they’re from.
”
“How’s that?” Kaillar asked, giving the barista their orders and then paying for them before Becca could protest.
“The cooled lava provides a great breeding ground for coral and other microorganisms to hang out. If they don’t properly clean their cuts, they get back to the mainland with injuries that continue to get infected and won’t heal. Most of the bigger resorts and hotels have onsite medical stations to help educate and treat people who have injured themselves by not reading the warning signs.”
“Sounds like it would behoove people to have someone knowledgeable about the island with them.”
“It does help. Hawaii is a beautiful place, but also very dangerous. Even deadly.”
Kaillar handed her the cup of coffee, and then led her over to a railing that looked down upon the terminal below. “You know firsthand about that.” It was a statement, not a question.
Becca sipped her coffee and nodded sadly, “Yeah. I do.”
“Will you tell me about it? Not right this minute,” he told her when she started to deny him with a shake of her head. “Just…sometime while we’re here, will you talk to me about what happened? Something tells me you haven’t done that with many people.”
Becca looked down and murmured, “No one actually.” She looked up at him, her eyes growing slightly watery and she cleared her throat, “People think they know what happened that day, but no one truly does. Not that’s still alive to talk about it. They all just assumed…,” she cleared her throat again. “I haven’t talked to anyone about that day.”
“Why not?” Kaillar asked softly, amazement in his voice.
“What difference would it have truly made? The only people that mattered thought I was guilty, and I am. Just not for the reasons they believe. But the reasons don’t change the fact that because of me, and my actions, my brother is dead.”
“You might be surprised at how ….”
“No. Nothing will ever make this better.” She glanced up, and saw Kalino standing by the charter desk, waving to them. “Looks like he’s ready to go.”
Kai watched her carefully for a moment and then nodded, as if he’d agreed to her silent request to change the subject. He stepped up close to her, searching her eyes for some hidden answer, “You don’t sound all that thrilled about going home.”
“No.”
When she didn’t elaborate, he touched her shoulder, “Becca, if there’s anything I can do…”
“There’s not. I mean, having you here is helping already.” When he continued to look at her in grave concern, she attempted a smile, “I’m fine. Tired. Hungry. And in need of a shower, but I’ll be fine. Stop looking so worried.”
“I wish there was something I could do to make this easier for you,” he murmured. “Gracie would probably…”
“Gracie would be too emotional and trust me, that’s not what I need right now.” I thought I wanted Gracie with me, but she would force me to deal with the emotions, and I’d be a bawling mess by now, and probably for the rest of my stay. I need to be strong, get through the funeral, and then get back to Colorado where I can bury all of these useless emotions once again.
Chapter 6
She finished walking across the tiled terminal floor to meet Kalino, offering him up a forced smile. She could see the worry and questions in his eyes, but after dealing with Kaillar’s questions, she didn’t have anything left in her defenses. She sent a silent plea up that he would leave things alone.
“You all ready to fly?” Kalino asked with a big smile, seeing the worry on Becca’s face, and knowing she was afraid he was going to force her to talk about the past. He wasn’t sure what she’d been doing for the last four years, but dealing with the past didn’t seem to be one of them.
He owed it to Kevin to help his sister while she was here, but not right now. She looked exhausted and he could see she was teetering on the edge of losing control. He’d be patient and when the time was right, he’d do what he could to help her heal. But he couldn’t let her think that he didn’t care. That he hadn’t thought about her and wondered how she was doing. He had to at least let her know that much before they flew home.
Becca nodded her head, “Ready as I’ve ever been.”
Kalino’s eyes clouded at the trepidation he heard in her voice. He met her just before she went through the doorway, lowering his voice, “Becca, I never got a chance to say how sorry I was about Kevin. Things were so crazy, and I…”
Becca shook her head at him, “You were in a coma. I waited to leave until I knew you were going to be all right, but I couldn’t stay any longer. It was just too hard.”
Kalino nodded, “It took me a long time before I could go back out on a board. I still think about him every time I do.”
Becca felt tears sting her eyes, and she wiped them away with a hand, “Thanks for being his friend. He was happiest when he was with you out on the water.” She took a deep breath, and then stood up a little taller, “I’m ready to go home.”
“Then let’s do this thing.” Kalino gave Kaillar a nod of his head, and then he led the way out to his twin engine, fixed prop, Cessna plane with the bright hibiscus flower painted on the side.
“Nice ride,” Kaillar commented, ducking his head as he climbed into the seating area behind Becca. With her diminutive figure, she’d had no trouble entering the small aircraft, but his height wasn’t nearly as kind. At 6’6” tall, he was always having to watch bumping his head in places others didn’t. The plane presented a new problem, in that he couldn’t stand up completely even once he cleared the doors.
He quickly chose a seat directly across from Becca, glad for the opportunity to sit, rather than stoop.
“Not much head room back there, sorry,” Kalino called from where he sat in the pilot’s seat.
“No worries,” Kaillar assured him. His phone buzzed, and he quickly turned it off.
“One of your brothers?” Becca asked.
“Yeah. Justin’s called twice now, wanting to make sure we arrived safely and to see how you’re doing.” He looked at her, and then lowered his voice, “What do I answer?”
“About how I’m doing?” she asked, waiting for his nod before she thought for a moment. “Well, I’m sure he’s only asking because the girls are. Tell him I’m fine and that we should be back in a couple of days.”
A couple of days? “Really? You don’t want to stick around and help your mom?”
Becca turned her head to the window and shrugged, “I doubt she would want my help. Things between us weren’t good when I left.”
Kaillar was quiet for a moment and then asked, “Is this about your brother?”
“Partially. So many things happened at the same time, and my mother was grieving. We all were, but I think my brother’s death hit her harder than the rest of us.” She shook her head, “I’d rather not dredge all that up again.”
Kaillar nodded his head, “I’m here if you need to talk. Why don’t you tell me about this resort you grew up on?”
Becca nodded; taking the opportunity he was giving her to change the subject. “Well, it started out as a large beach house and over the years, my grandparents built additional bungalow style living units on the property. At one point in time, it was a pineapple farm, but they discovered there was much more money to be made catering to tourists than there was in growing pineapples.”
“Are your grandparents still alive?”
“No. They both died when I was little. My grandmother passed first, when I was in the fifth grade. It was the first funeral I’d ever gone to, and I was a little mystified that everyone seemed so happy. I remember sitting up in the trees watching everyone eat and laugh, wondering why no one was crying. I felt like crying.”
“Funerals are tough on kids,” Kaillar commented.
“Yeah. Anyway, my mom found me and explained to me that sadness served no purpose. It wouldn’t bring them back, and it only made getting on with living harder. I believ
ed her, and when my grandfather passed away a few years later, I joined in the festivities and tried not to feel sad.”
“But you were?”
“I was. My dad was too. He hid it well, but I would find him sometimes late at night, standing in the backyard with tears streaming down his face. He never knew I saw him, and he always composed himself before he came back inside.”
“Crying wasn’t acceptable to your father?” Kaillar asked, wondering if she’d learned to hide her emotions from him.
“Not to a man. I think that’s why my brother and he fought so often. My father spent his entire adult life hiding his emotions away from the world, while my brother wore his heart on his sleeve for all to see.”
Kalino had been listening to the conversation and interjected, “Kevin was the coolest kid in school. Smart. Athletic. Good looking. All of the guys were jealous of him.”
Kaillar asked, “He was younger than you?” When she nodded, he asked, “By how much?”
“Five years. Mom had a couple of miscarriages, and she always said Kevin was her miracle baby.”
“What did she say about you?” Kaillar wanted to know.
Becca looked at him and then away, mumbling, “I’m the one who broke her heart.”
Kalino heard her, turned his head, and shook it, “You know that’s not entirely true. Your mom doted on you. Whatever you think you know, remember you left before anyone had time to heal. Your mom was grieving and continued to do so, not only for Kevin, but because you’d left.”
Becca stared at him, “That’s not true. They were glad when I left. They didn’t have the constant reminder of how much I’d cost them.”
Three Brothers Lodge - The Complete Series Box Set Page 22
