by Mia Ford
“Okay…Okay, fine. Just…Sit down, will you?” As he spoke, he guided me back to the bed. “Let me get some light in here and I’ll help you.”
“Thank you,” I answered, relieved that he was going to do something about it instead of just telling me to go back to sleep.
Obviously still waking up, I watched his shadow slunk over to the large oven and prime the embers of the fire and add firewood so that the flames returned, giving some light to the room.
I waited patiently, even though it was difficult.
When he returned, though, Johnathan helped me over to the sink. He unbandaged my head and got me a chair to sit down on. Afterwards, he eased me back, so that he could carefully clean my hair.
“Thank you,” I replied again, as I watched his large hands methodically and carefully remove the crimson from my hair.
I wasn’t sure if he didn’t hear me, or simply didn’t feel like responding, but either way, he said nothing. Instead, he used some kind of soap on my hair, before washing it out, paying particular care not to touch the spot where the blood had originated.
“I can’t touch that yet,” he announced, pointing to the back of my hair. “I don’t want it to start bleeding all over again.”
“That’s okay,” I replied, but he was already back to work. I wondered if he had done that purposefully, to let me know that he wasn’t asking for my permission.
Still, I didn’t care. He could be a jerk all he wanted, so long as he helped me feel like myself and not like the Carrie in the movie who got covered in pig’s blood.
At least this was my own blood, I tried to tell myself as the sickening thought passed through my mind, but it ended up doing little to console me.
Blood was blood and it was gross.
After Johnathan had finished, he told me that if I wanted, I could take a shower to wash off my body.
Pointing me toward the bathroom, he warned, “Don’t get water in your cut. It’s starting to scab, and I don’t want anything to fuck it up. It’s actually looking good.”
The thought made me weak in the knees but instead of dwelling on that, I managed to shake my head. “Okay. Thanks.”
I hobbled over to the bathroom, with Johnathan guiding me. He made sure I was alright before quickly leaving the room.
The shower was simple and seemed to be more of an outdoor setup than indoor plumbing, but I supposed I should be grateful for at least this advancement.
I took the hose off the rung and pointed it down while I turned the nozzle. Water immediately shot out of the sprayer. It was freezing but thankfully, I didn’t have it pointed toward me.
The water seemed to take forever to warm up, even marginally, but when it did, I was thankful. I used the strange soap that had the scent of pine and washed myself off, careful to keep my injured ankle out of the water as well. Even though it wasn’t open, it still had a splint on it and I didn’t feel like going through the effort to take it off.
I was simply happy to not feel crusty anymore.
When I got out of the shower, I saw there was a towel hanging on the hook that I could’ve sworn wasn’t there before. I dried myself off as best as I could before putting the towel around my body and walking back out, into the main portion of the cabin.
I noticed that the bed was changed, with new sheets and I had comfortable clothes on the bed, laid out for me.
I looked around and saw Johnathan in his normal spot, sitting in his chair, rocking slowly back and forth, watching the fire.
He didn’t seem to notice that I was there, or made no attempt to enlighten me, so I cleared my throat.
“Thanks for putting my clothes out…and changing my sheets,” I called, but Johnathan didn’t turn around.
I looked over at the bed and a previously displaced Jake was now rolling around on the covers playfully, as though he was trying to get his scent back on the sheets.
Swinging out a little bit, to look around the chair, I saw that Johnathan’s head was cocked to the side and his eyes were closed.
I didn’t think he was sleeping for some reason, but I figured if he didn’t want to speak to me, he didn’t have to and so, I shrugged and walked back over to the bed.
After putting the clean pajamas on, I crawled back into the bed and was finally able to get a good night’s sleep.
The next morning, my senses woke me with the sounds and smells of breakfast.
At first, I was confused, wondering why there was a big hairy thing in my bed, and who was making breakfast.
Yet, when a shot of pain reverberated up my leg, I remembered what had happened and where I was, before opening my eyes. I moved slightly, and the massive dog inched closer to me, almost like a child, grumbling in his sleep.
I stifled a chuckle and hugged him, hoping that today was going to be better than the past few days. I couldn’t take much more arguing and craziness. I wasn’t used to all of this and while I no longer had a fear of Johnathan, I wanted to like him. I wanted to learn more about him.
I had no idea why I wanted him to let me in, but I was willing to believe that I had met him for a reason.
Obviously, this could’ve been the fact that he saved me, coupled with the dream that made me think this way, but knowing that didn’t dampen my resolve.
I wanted to get to know Johnathan and I wanted to figure out why he was up here, all alone.
While he was intensely guarded, I had no doubt in his sanity.
I didn’t think he was dangerous, because there was nothing that he had done that even hinted he wasn’t in control of himself. So, that ruled out that he was hiding from the law, but what else would make a man take up such a solitary life?
It wasn’t the fact that it was off the grid and in the mountains that made me so curious. There were plenty of people who enjoyed their privacy and would love to have such a place to get away.
What intrigued me, was that this wasn’t a getaway for Johnathan. This was a permanent residence and he didn’t share it with another living soul.
It must be such a lonely existence and to want that, something awful must have happened to him.
I wanted to know what that was, because for some reason, I believed that whatever happened, I could help him.
However, when I opened my eyes, my thoughts seemed silly, and overthought, as a far more jovial Johnathan greeted me.
“Good morning!” Johnathan exclaimed, placing a plate of eggs and bacon on the table next to her.
“Oh…Thank you!” I exclaimed, feeling my stomach rumble at the sight of the food.
“You’re welcome. You’re going to need your strength today, because I want you to try to walk around.”
I grinned, taking the plate onto my lap, “Are you trying to get rid of me?”
Instead of getting defensive, as I feared he might, he grinned, knowing that I was teasing him.
“Well, as much as I would like to sleep in my own bed at some point soon, no. I’m giving you a little tough love because I don’t want your muscles to get complacent. Trust me, you don’t want that either. If you’re ever going to make it down that mountain, you are going to have to start somewhere. Besides, I’m sure you don’t want to stay here a second more than you have to.”
“Actually, it’s not too bad,” I mused, hoping I didn’t sound as desperate as I felt I came across. I was only trying to be friendly, but it came out sounding kind of seductive, which wasn’t my intent. Immediately, I felt my cheeks redden with embarrassment. “I mean, I told you, I find it relaxing…The cabin and all that.”
Johnathan nodded, “Yeah, I get that. I feel the same way myself. I love it up here…Usually, there’s hardly anyone else around. It’s great.” Staring at me for a long moment, I was sure he was going to ask me a question, but it took him a while, I supposed, to figure out how he wanted to ask the question. “So, what is it that makes you want to be relaxed in a cabin, with no way to contact the outside world?”
“I could ask you the same thing? I’m not ex
actly here by choice.”
“So, you’re making the best out of a bad situation?” He asked, though not with any hint of being insulted. He genuinely seemed interested in my thought process.
“I guess. I mean, considering what happened…But I came up to the mountains in the first place to get away. I thought hiking would be the answer, but this is much better.” I grinned.
“Well, I can’t really take that as a compliment. I mean, the cabin is the better of two genuinely shitty options.”
I chuckled, “The mountain wasn’t supposed to be a shitty option. However, I still think this is nicer.”
“Wow. Maybe you hit your head a little harder than I thought,” he joked.
“No, seriously, Johnathan. I’ve always been a simple girl. I don’t need a lot and lately, there has been a lot to deal with.”
“What do you mean? What do you do, when you’re not…attempting to return to nature?”
“I am in college. I’m studying to be a paralegal,” I answered. “I go to NC state.”
“Damn,” Johnathan answered, “I guess you’re right. You do have an excuse to want to get away.”
“It’s not that I want to get away from anything. I can’t wait to get on with my life. I love helping people and I can’t wait to start doing what I’m going to school for…Schools not that bad. It’s just…a lot.” I simpered, “I needed a break from it all, just to recharge my batteries. While I really didn’t have anyone, who wanted to go with me, I wasn’t exactly begging anyone to come with me either. I was happy to go alone, because I thought it would help me relax.”
“What kind of high maintenance friends do you have?” He teased.
“One of the most high-maintenance…and she knows it too. She would tell you. She’s crazy, but we’ve been friends for years. If I took her along, I would have to hear her bitching about bugs, the sun, the grass, the stones, the sky and the mountain itself for a week. She isn’t an outdoors person.”
“And…no one else would go with you?”
“I wouldn’t want anyone else to go with me. My parents wouldn’t climb a mountain and my other friends, they’re school friends, you know? Not, go brave the wilderness friends.”
“There’s a difference?”
“Of course, there’s a difference,” I answered with a slight insinuation to my voice that he immediately picked up on.
“You realize, you’re talking to the guy who prefers the company of a dog, to any human beings, right?”
“Fair enough. So, you just hate everybody, huh?”
“Yeah, pretty much,” he retorted playfully, “People are stupid.”
I rolled my eyes, “So, do you think you’re better than everyone else, or what?”
“Oh, God no. I’m a dick. I wouldn’t want to be my friend either. I’m surprised poor Jake has stuck it out this long,” he insisted playfully.
“Jake loves you,” I insisted, glancing at the dog, who was now looking between us, hoping that someone would sacrifice a piece of bacon for him.
“He just loves me because I feed him,” Johnathan insisted.
“Sometimes, that’s all you need.”
“Yup, this pup is all I need,” Johnathan, insisted, giving up a piece of his bacon to an extremely happy Jake, as he pet the dogs massive head.
Jake swallowed the bacon in one bite and immediately started to scour both of our plates for another.
“That’s all you get,” Johnathan insisted, “Don’t look at her plate. She needs her strength. You’re fine.”
As though Jake understood what his owner was saying, he huffed in protest before flopping onto the floor and laying down, away from us.
“He’s never happy, that dog,” Johnathan laughed.
“But he’s so cute!” I exclaimed, wishing I had given up some of my bacon while I still had the chance.
“Ugh…He’s two-hundred pounds of pure muscle and fur… He’s not cute.”
“And that is why, I think he might like me better,” I retorted.
“Eh, he definitely likes you better,” he replied hastily, in a way that slightly lessened the effect of my joke. “But he’s stuck with me…Speaking of which, if you’re able to move around on it today, we’ll work on it a little more for the next few days, but I’m hoping you’ll be well enough to get back down the mountain in a little while. From what I can see of it right now, the sprain seems to be healing nicely. I’m more worried about re-injury than I am about you not being able to make it. I just want to make sure you don’t overdo it too soon.”
“Thanks,” I answered, feeling the spark of a connection starting to take shape again. I grinned at him.
However, this time, he didn’t respond in a positive manner. He swallowed hard and put his plate to the side. His expression wasn’t angry, but it scared me.
“What?” I asked, my face falling to match his morose expression. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah…I just…I feel like I have to tell you something,” Johnathan replied, putting his plate down on the ground and settling in to have a serious conversation.
Suddenly, the remainder of my breakfast was no longer appealing. I felt my stomach churn as I wondered what could possibly be so important, or so grave, that he would feel the need to be so serious about.
Since, the one thing I had learned about Johnathan was that unless he was angry, he didn’t take things overly serious. He would rather insult a problem or tell it to go to hell wit his dry sense of humor than actually address it, which I was starting to get used to. Instead, though, right now, he seemed almost too serious.
“Johnathan, you’re scaring me…” I offered, pulling back from him.
“Good. You should be scared,” he scowled, “Cause it scared the shit out of me and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it.”
“What?” I asked, inching back toward him, although I felt my body shaking. I wasn’t sure what he was going to tell me and I feared that something would snap in him and I would be thrown back into a terrible situation, like I was at the campsite.
It wasn’t that I didn’t trust Johnathan, it was more that I was having a hard time trusting anyone presently. It seemed like every time I moved, since the incident, I was afraid something was going to attack me.
I didn’t want to live this way and my only hope was that it would get better with time, but I doubted it and Johnathan’s expression wasn’t helping this idea.
“So,” he started skeptically, as though he still wasn’t sure if he wanted to tell me what he felt he needed to. Yet, after a pause, he continued, “You know when I told you I found your tent and your bag? I told you that I didn’t find anything else?”
“Yeah?” I prodded as my heart started to thump loud and hastily in my chest. Instantly, I felt sick and the words spilled out of me before I could stop them, “Did you find the guy? Did you kill him?”
“What?” Johnathan seemed to be removed from the seriousness of the situation for a moment, as he shook his head. “No! Why would you think…” His voice willingly cut off there and his head bobbed in a motion as though he had answered his own question and no longer needed further explanation. “Uh…No. I didn’t kill him, but that’s partially only because I didn’t find him. I did find his bag…”
“His hiking pack?”
“No. Probably a bag that he had in his hiking pack. It looked like a medical bag? Kind of…Anyway, I found a knife, rope, duct tape and the damn drug he used to knock you out with in the bag.” He spoke quickly now, as though he was trying to get it all out before he changed his mind about saying any of it. “The good news is, the drug he used won’t have any lasting effects. It’s basically generic Valium, so it won’t have any lasting effects, but the other stuff I found suggests that…”
“He was going to kill me,” I replied, saying the words aloud made my stomach curdle. Again, I felt sick.
“Jesus, I’m sorry, Carrie. I wasn’t going to tell you, but I felt that you had a right to know…” He insi
sted, gingerly grasping my shoulder in an attempt to be supportive.
However, I wasn’t listening to him. Even though I had known that was a possibility, even as the assault was happening, the pre-meditation that had gone into the attack and the obvious, ultimate intention made my head spin.
Those eyes returned, burning into my soul and now that I was certain of their true intention, I was certain that I would likely never be able to rest comfortably and securely again.
If the guide had intended to kill me after he had gotten what he wanted, he would definitely want to kill me now that he was interrupted.
Thoughts of how my life was in danger, as well as Johnathan’s life flooded my conscious, making me feel guilty as well as terrified.
I wasn’t sure what I had thought happened to him before but the thought of him coming back for me wasn’t high on the realm of my possibilities. However, now, I feared that it was the only logical conclusion.
I supposed I had hoped this was a random act and that he was never going to try it again, because it had failed. I knew that was a dumb idea, especially now, but it was hard for my brain to contemplate anything else. Now, those ideas seemed like fantasies, wishful thinking, though I knew the reality was far darker.
As all of this weighed down on me, I felt increasingly lightheaded as the black curtain started to close from the corners of my eyes. I heaved a breath, which was useless, as though I was punched in the stomach and was certain that I was about to pass out.
