I loved Veiko but I didn't think he loved me as much as I loved him. One thing my mother had told me was always be the one who loves less. It’s better than being the one who loves more. Loving more isn't worth the pain.
While thinking of my mother, I knew we had this in common. We both loved men who loved us less than we loved them. At least it sure as hell seemed that way.
Jo was expecting a baby and I was jealous but life wasn't fair. I’d still be her friend. At some point, just not right now. I was free of everyone and would go on living my life. In time, I’d go back to dancing and even riding horses.
I shut my eyes and for the first time in weeks, there were no dreams.
~☠ ☠ ☠ CHAPTER 40 ☠ ☠ ☠~
Veiko stood there and let Hunter verbally assault him. He knew the older man was speaking the truth in every word he said. He had let his mother run his life because he’d been sick and weak. He should have told her about Kima long before all of this happened.
Thrash had married China and took her on a dream honeymoon to France. Their mother was a bully who'd lost two of her sons now.
He jerked his head up when Hunter shoved him.
"Did you fucking hear me, Veiko? Kima shot Rabid! She killed that fucking bastard by herself because you and your club were too pussy to go in there and get her out!”
Veiko was stunned. Kima shot Rabid? He was finally dead? Fuck! He demanded, “Where's Kima?”
Hunter angrily stared at him. "Kima doesn't want to see you. Leave her alone. She's done with you.”
Veiko stared back at Hunter. "Like hell I will! She's my old lady!”
He took off running to their cabin. Hunter, Thorn, Bullet, and Marco just watched.
Elena was on the deck above and called down, "Thorn, that gun she had still in the cabin?”
Thorn looked up at Elena. "I didn't take any gun out of there.”
"Serves him right if she shoots his ass," Hunter muttered.
Bullet replied, "Nah, she won't. That girl’s in love with him.”
"I don't think Kima loves anything anymore,” Marco declared seriously, looking at everyone.
They were all standing there waiting to hear if Kima had shot V but there were just the usual sounds of the woods.
Finally Hunter told Bullet to get ready to follow him to the junkyard.
Bullet pulled Thorn aside, "We need to clear the trunk of the car out. There's guns and drugs in there. You got a place to stash em?"
Thorn looked around for his father and didn't see him. "Yeah, go up the road and dump it all behind some bushes. I'll take it to a deer stand I have out there. I'll follow you; we gotta be quick. It can't be left here for long though, or Hunter will flip.”
"It won't be. There's gonna be a huge search to find out where all of Rabid's hiding spots are for drugs and money. I know of a few. We've got a lotta of work ahead of us to get this club back on track."
~☠ ☠ ☠~
Veiko walked into the cabin and saw Kima sleeping on the bed. His heart ached. She looked at peace and still like his girl. His wild child, his beautiful fallen angel, the love of his life.
This woman had been through so much and he'd fucked up. But that was going to change, beginning right now. Rabid had needed to die but Kima shouldn't have had to kill him! Kima had the balls to actually do it, when no one else had. He ached inside for all his woman had been through.
He didn't deserve her, but he'd sure as hell spend a lifetime proving to her how much he loved her.
He sat down beside her and stroked her hair. He'd let his angel rest for now. He removed his colors and leather and laid down beside her. She was sleeping so soundly she never moved as he cuddled up to her.
~☠ ☠ ☠ CHAPTER 41 ☠ ☠ ☠~
I knew Veiko was in my bed. I felt his warm body and I smelled all his familiar scents. Damn the man! Why didn't he leave me alone when I asked him too? My head ached and I was not in the mood to see Veiko! I felt him put his arm around me. It felt like old times.
“Babe, wake the fuck up. I've been missing you for too damn long. You belong to me!"
“Veiko, I can't do this! You want to go back to where we were and I am a fucking mess!”
Veiko leaned over me looking into my eyes. “Babe - just give me a chance and I'll balance out the club and our life I swear to you! Just give it a chance. You promised me, we'd love each other forever!”
I sighed, “I do love you forever V - I just don't love me! Look at what I did! How am I going to live with myself?"
He grabbed my face gently. “You did what you had to do, that is how! Kima, together we'll get through this. Just give yourself some time to recover. You're strong and together we can get through anything. We already have babe, why can't you see it?”
I sighed again. “We're done! I can't do this! Why can't you understand that? My head is fucked up! I don't know if I will ever be normal! I can't even think straight! I just blew holes into a crazy scumbag president of your club! You need to go away! Why would you even want to be with me?"
He stroked my cheek. “Nah, Babe. We've just begun...again. I'm sorry for everything. I was working on getting you away from that fucker. It killed me each day he had you. I'm gonna spend the rest of my life making it up to you. Kima, you have to understand; this life, you chose to come into it with me. You knew. I told you all about it. Just as you chose to dance. You chose to enter this life of mine with me. Life sometimes sucks, but we were both lucky. We made it through a lot of shit and we're meant to be together!”
V was staring at me intently. I didn't know what to say to that. I knew he wasn't capable of doing much lying in a hospital bed. But what about the rest of his club? Where were they? It hurt they'd left me to deal with Rabid while they were trying to get a plan together. What the hell had they waited for? I knew I'd never get answers to those questions! I watched him get up and grab his leather jacket. Seeing Veiko dressed and in bed was a shocker, I'd never saw that before!
“I've had something in my leather since the night of the accident.”
Veiko stroked my arm. I pulled away fast. Oh no, he wasn't touching me again.
V handed his leather jacket to me. He looked at me with a hopeful smile. “Inside pocket.”
I sat up. "Why do I care what's in your pocket, Veiko? Is the baby I lost in there?” If the words hurt V, I didn't care. Maybe he'd finally go away.
There was a flash of pain in Veiko's eyes. "Just gimme a chance, babe. We'll have more babies. You want a baby, we'll start making one right away.”
I looked at V, dumbfounded. "I shot the president of your fucking club. Aren't you supposed to kill me or something?”
V laughed. "We needed him dead. Your plan worked better than ours. I heard Rabid left you, Bullet, and Marco down here to go find some drugs or a hooker. Rabid hasn't been seen yet. Isn't that the story? Babe? I need to ask you something though. Do you want to be with Darko?”
My eyes widened. “Darko? We're just friends. He was my friend when nobody else was, but I never slept with him. How dare you ask me that? He's more of a friend to me than my so called friends! I'll always be friends with Darko. Don't even go there, Veiko!"
Veiko had a slight smile. "Open that pocket, Trouble. I'm not telling you not to be friends with Darko. I just needed to know if it was more then that. Truly Kima, I don't care if you were with him. But I never cheated on you, babe!"
I unzipped the pocket. A small square box fell into my hand. "I told you, V. I didn't sleep with anyone! What Rabid did to me isn't my fault! See, this won't work! Now you think I slept with Darko! Screw you, V! Yeah, we dated and maybe it would have been something but it didn't happen! Darko knew I was still in love with you even when I hated you!"
I was shocked as Veiko knelt beside the bed and took the box out of my hand. “Kima, will you marry me and be inside my heart and soul for the rest of our lives?”
I loved this man. I didn't want to go on living my life without him. But I wasn't going to mak
e this easy for him. He had to make some promises first.
“I want to live on my grandparent’s farm. I want to have babies, dogs and horses. You need to figure out how we can live our life and the club fits into it. You need to believe me when I say I didn't sleep with another man. I won't be last all the time, Veiko. If you can promise me all of that, and stick to it, I'll marry you. If I'm always last I'll kick you to the curb! I swear you'll be out of my life forever. If we have a child, you won't be involved. Hopefully, I won't have to kill anybody else either but I will if I have to! You need to understand I am not the same Kima as I was before! Do you really think you can do all of that?"
V groaned and leaned in to kiss me, murmuring, “I promise you that and more, Babe.”
We kissed each other hungrily. V broke off the kiss and I felt him slip the ring on. I looked down at it. My family must have told him - it was the princess cut diamond ring I always swore I'd get someday from Sea Jewels.
I looked at Veiko with a hard glare. "I never want your mother near me again. I thought my parents were bad but that bitch is worse than both my parents, put together, drunk. She blamed me for the accident and Thrash marrying China! She kept calling me a whore and keeping us apart really hurt me.”
Veiko looked ashamed. "I know, babe. I was stupid for letting her run my life while I was injured. Thrash and me, we're done with her. But I do have a sister I'm close with. I'd like to see her if I can."
That I could understand because no one would keep me away from my siblings. "We're going to see my parents. I have a ring to show off and my daddy better have money for a wedding. I don't know when we'll have time to see your sister, though.”
“A wedding? As in a big one?” V didn't sound thrilled.
“I just want a small wedding. I don't like too many of my friends right now!”
V was looking intently at me, "Kima?"
I looked at him. This man I’d sworn to keep safe and loved far too much. "What now, V?"
He smiled that sexy smile. "I'll marry you babe and you'll have too many kids, horses, dogs, and whatever else you want. Just promise me one thing?”
I glared at him. "What?"
I saw his smile deepen. "Promise you won't ever shoot me."
I started to smile but stopped, I wasn't making that promise. Oh hell no! If V needed shooting, I'd shoot him in his ass, no doubt about it. "No can do. If you cheat on me, I'll shoot you!"
"Babe, I’m not a cheater. Get over here and let me hold you.”
"V, you said this wasn't a fairy tale and there wouldn't be a happy ending. Guess you were wrong, huh?”
He just kissed me again softly. "Yeah, I was wrong about that shit. Now you got me believing in fairy tales.”
Feeling V's body next to mine again was heavenly. He was right; our lives together had just begun again.
I swore we’d have lots of children. Twins! I hoped we have a few daughters to drive V crazy. And, I damn sure hoped my parents were ready for their wild child to get married. I wasn't going to stop being wild. Nor would I ever let any man control me or hurt me like Rabid had. But I had a good feeling about Veiko and me. I knew that we'd make it in this crazy thing called life!
~☠ ☠ ☠ EPILOGUE ☠ ☠ ☠~
I sat back and reread what I had written.
Veiko would have a fit if he knew what I'd been writing. He had opened the door for me to finally rid myself of some demons I had. But was it enough? I'd write more tomorrow. Now I had to get myself dressed and go downstairs.
I didn't want to worry my friends. I wish I could tell them the whole damn story but Veiko wouldn't ever forgive me. He was trying to protect me from ever going to jail, I knew that. The police had never contacted me about Rabid and whatever the club had said I didn't know. I loved Veiko more than I ever had but I wish he would let me talk to him about Rabid.
I copied what I wrote and sent it to the new email account I just had created. It would be my secret and nobody would ever see it. I trashed my first copy and cleaned the computer. Enough of this stressing out! I had a new thought for Veiko to think about. I was going to tell him I planned to start Bound to Hell MC for us old ladies! That ought to keep his bossy self out of my business for a while!
I thought of AJ flirting with Trace. We'd have to talk soon before she jumped into this lifestyle! I wanted so much more for her. My children needed me, my friends needed me and of course Veiko Finn needed me! As for my issues, I'd over come everything life tossed my way so far.
I'd fix myself.
I was Kima Regan Finn after all!
The End
~☠ ☠ ☠~
Want more from Bound For Hell MC Series?
Nailed
The story of Nailz and Jo will be coming soon!
Sneak Peek from Ride To Temptation
The first novel from the Rough Riders MC Series
By Selene Chardou
Cillian knew how odd Gisela found it for him to be in her condo but he needed to get this shit off his chest. If everything went down the way he thought it would, he would need a good attorney. He’d have to convince her beforehand to represent him and that, in turn, made her an accessory to his future crime.
He hadn’t gone to law school like she had but he knew enough to know what he was doing was dangerous for the both of them. This was a seductive game of cat and mouse and he wanted her so badly, he would have her anyway he could get her, even if it was under the worst circumstances.
If he told her what was going on, he’d be in direct violation of Saints’ rules pertaining to club business. However, if he didn’t tell her and expected her to defend him after the fact, what if she refused?
He’d been to prison already—a small stint but he kept his head down, mouth shut and served his time all the same—and he had no desire to ever return. If everything went pear-shaped and he was left without an advocate, he’d be looking at a life sentence, one he knew for a fact he wouldn’t be able to do.
Cillian looked around her condo and noticed hardwood floors with liberally spread Persian carpets, understated, yet elegant, furniture, and a view to die for. There wasn’t much to see at the moment, except the twinkling of lights that barely illuminated the McMansions on this side of the lake, but in the daylight it would be amazing.
Beyond the lake were trees and the wind outside was blowing bitter and cold. Soon, there would be snow and he wasn’t looking forward to that. It was a bitch to ride on snowy roads and he’d have to rely on his truck to get him around unless it was official Club business. Even then it wasn’t safe to drive their motorcycles and better to load his in his Ford F-150.
He didn’t even have to turn around to know she’d walked back into the living room, but he did anyway. She was barefoot and wore silk pajamas. Her breasts were free; he could see her nipples harden as she avoided his gaze and grabbed an ashtray from the kitchen counter.
“Take your shoes off and sit down. Judging by your expression, it’s serious and this is gonna take a while.”
He took off his shitkickers and left them at the front door before he strolled to the wrap-around sofa. He sat beside her but made sure he kept his distance - the last thing he needed to do was spook her.
Her amber eyes looked into his as she grabbed a joint from her cigarette case and lit it. She took a drag before she handing it to him.
“When did you start smoking bud?” Cillian knew he didn’t have any room to judge her—he wasn’t known as “The Killer” for nothing—but something about her was different and it was the first time he’d noticed it up close and personal.
It wasn’t like they never saw one another. There were various functions each year that brought them into the same vicinity but, at the same time, neither went out of their way to talk. Gisela wasn’t the angry and loud type. She’d always been quiet, innocent, and so fucking beautiful. He felt like by touching her, he’d tarnished her somehow, because he wasn’t fit to breathe the same air as her. She was, without a doubt, an infinitely be
tter person than he could ever hope to be.
It never stopped him from fucking her every chance he’d gotten when they were teenagers and he had to have every inch of her. He needed them to be connected in every way and they were, whether they wanted to admit it or not. They shared a child and, at one time, they’d been inseparable but that was like a lifetime ago.
“Don’t worry about my Chronic habit.” Her voice was feminine yet strong. “I don’t do anything harder and I’m not going about flashin’ my pussy to every available man, so mind your own fuckin’ business. I already have a father—I don’t need another.”
Cillian couldn’t help but smile as he dragged from the joint, holding the smoke in his lungs as long as possible before exhaling.
“I didn’t mean to raise your hackles, darlin’. You were another person when we were together—”
“Yeah that was long fuckin’ time ago, Cillian.” She smiled wryly as she purposely mispronounced his name. The first time they’d met, she stared at him as if he were the devil himself and wondered out loud, “You’re Cillian Cox? My dad would kill me if he knew you were offering me a ride into Pine Bluff.”
“My name’s pronounced Kill-e-an,” he’d told her. “It’s an old Irish name. I get shit from the teachers all day pronouncing it with a ‘C’ sound instead of a ‘K.’”
Those were fun times, innocent times, but certainly not the present. He handed her back the joint.
“Listen, I know you didn’t come here for sex because obviously you and Chiara did more than talk…what’s goin’ on?”
Cillian needed to do something with his hands. He reached into his pocket and grabbed his pack of Camels. After freeing one, he lit it with his Zippo and dragged hungrily. “Are you sure you want to know? I mean…I don’t even know why I’m tellin’ you …you could be disbarred.”
Wild Child Page 31
