“That’s what she said.”
“Hilarious.” Erika rolled her eyes.
“Yeah, I’m full of ’em.”
“Full of it, more like. What are you doing tonight?”
Jenna sighed. “I have a class, so I’ll do that, and then probably just go home. I’m tired. I haven’t been sleeping the best.”
“Me neither, but at least I have someone when I wake up. Why don’t you give in and let Josh stay with you?”
“We’ve been over this.”
“I know, but sometimes if I just keep hitting your head, someone inside finally hears and opens the door.”
“Your metaphors need work.”
Jenna hit her office, and saw Josh sitting calmly in the corner. “Why don’t you go out for a beer or something? I’m going to be a while.”
“I don’t trust you to stay put. Yet.”
Jenna opened her mouth to argue, but Josh gave her a “you can move a mountain easier than you can change my mind” kind of look, so Jenna just shrugged and got to it. The other two were pulling more weight than she was, and she needed to make up for the hours lost in shopping, eating, and fraternizing.
She shivered at the nature of the fraternizing. At the memory of Josh’s tongue in her ear and his hot breath on her neck. She also wondered if she could keep everything organized in their separate compartments in her head if she started sleeping with him. Surely a little sex wouldn’t spill out into her work life…
Chapter Seven
It was nearing eight o’clock and Jenna was just shutting everything down. Josh had come and gone all afternoon, talking with Jax, talking with other people in the office, probably women, and finally going to get a beer. Before he left, Josh told her that if she left the building without him, he would do something awful. Clear?
Always with the “clear?”
She texted him as she was shutting down then headed to the elevator in the darkened hallway. Almost everyone else on the floor had long since gone home, leaving the place quiet and serene. She sighed and rolled her shoulders, impatient for the elevator. Her mind wandered, wondering if Josh could sense danger, too. He could feel when something was coming, but would he sense her presence if he didn’t know she was there.
Wanting to test the theory, she backtracked before tucking herself into a dark office with the door still open. A moment later the elevator dinged. Metal doors shivered as they opened.
Jenna flattened herself against the wall and out of sight.
His light but rhythmic footsteps sounded down the hall, coming closer. Nearing her, he didn’t slow at all. Not even a little.
Smiling, she waited until he passed before stepping out quickly and jokingly saying, “Boo!”
“B—” came out before he whirled, his arms and feet moving so fast she lost sight of them. Everything blurred before she bent over backward, her back arched uncomfortably, and her head was cradled between his heavy arms.
Her heart started thumping when she realized she wasn’t being cradled like a lover—unless he was a female praying mantis.
His smooth, liquid grace went rigid as he realized what had happened. Very slowly and carefully, his breathing ragged, as though he had just run a mile at a full sprint, he straightened her up and felt her pulse.
She came to one of the most horrifying realizations of her life—he wasn’t sure if he had actually gone through with it. He was unsure of how close he had come to snapping the neck of the woman he loved.
Her blood turned into ice. Her limbs felt heavy. It meant he could have. Without thinking about it, he had the power and know-how to end her life in a split second without meaning to. Without even trying.
She wondered if this was how he had felt when she had pointed the gun at him just after just killing someone. It was terrifying.
When Josh’s fingers found the sweet spot on her neck, and felt how fast her heart was beating, which was pretty damned fast, he sank to the ground, bringing her onto his lap.
“Oh God, Jenna, please, please don’t ever do that again,” he moaned hoarsely, rocking slowly back and forth. He held her like a precious treasure, his body huddled over her, his breath thick with fear.
“I’m okay, Josh. I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault. Jenna, it’s not your fault. I’m the monster. I’m not safe.”
She shifted and his embrace tightened, trying to keep her there, not wanting her to leave him. With effort he loosened up, uncurling so she could get up. Instead, she shifted, turning her body so her legs wrapped around him and her head rested against his shoulder. His arms lost no time in hugging her close, crushing her to him in an effort to erase what he’d done. She felt his member stiffen, and she moved against it, wanting it inside of her, wanting to ease his pain any way she could. But he held her tighter, not letting her body move over him.
“No, Jenna. Not like this. I don’t want that memory erased or softened. I need to hold on to it to keep me from doing something like that again.”
She understood. She let him hold on to her a while longer, and then she climbed off. It was at that moment she noticed someone in the hallway staring.
“Hi, Don. How long you been standing there?” She smoothed the front of her suit.
“Long enough to know you are fraternizing with the bodyguard. Jenna”—Don shook his head disapprovingly—“that is horrifyingly clichéd.”
She laughed; she couldn’t help it. “It is, isn’t it? Well, if it makes you feel better, I first fraternized with him when I thought he was just a woods guide.”
Josh stood up slowly, wariness in his eyes. He wouldn’t look at her or Don.
Don groaned as he walked with them toward the elevator. “Even worse. You fraternized with your hero.”
“So. You knew.”
“Of course I did. What must you think of me to ask a question like that? I also know…” Don did a quick glance around. “Three men went in, and no one has heard from them since.”
“That’s dangerous information, Don. Good thing proof of that is a bitch to come by.”
“I have that information from sources who went in after those three men. I didn’t forsake you, kid. Although I should have known you’d find a way to take care of yourself, even if you had to find someone to do it for you.”
They all stepped into the elevator. Jenna stood close to Josh, knowing he needed her supportive presence. “Don, men have got themselves punched for saying less.”
“Don’t I know it.”
“You seem to have a large payroll that is…less than reputable.”
“You would be absolutely surprised what you can get away with in the white-collar world. Absolutely surprised. Shocked, really.
“I’ll say goodnight to you here,” Don said as they passed the front desk at the building entrance. “Dress smart and sophisticated tomorrow, but in a dress. It’s the groundbreaking and I want you to get in plenty of pictures with a hard hat and shovel.”
“In a dress?”
“I want you to look good, too.”
Jenna let him walk through the door and into the night. She turned back to Josh. “I’m late for my class, and I don’t really feel like working out anyway. I was thinking of being alone with a glass of wine, but I have a feeling you won’t let me be alone, so…want to join me?”
Josh shrugged. Jenna took that as a yes.
Chapter Eight
Jenna went to her favorite wine bar, sat in her usual corner, and was greeted by name by the waitress.
“Hey, Erin,” Jenna said. “I’ll have the usual.” One look at Josh, and Jenna figured he didn’t care what went into his mouth. “Make it two.”
Erin gave her a wink and went on her way.
“Look, Josh, I know you feel really bad about what happened, and in hindsight, I’m a bit of an idiot for not realizing that would happen, but I have no hard feelings. I pointed a gun at you, after all.”
“You’ve dealt with an awful lot from me. I was so desperate to make y
ou see that you’re the best thing for me despite your objections, I didn’t think what might be best for you. And that probably isn’t me. That’s what you’ve been trying to drill into me for so long, isn’t it?”
“Well, first—” Erin showed up with two glasses of Chianti and a generous cheese plate with bread, nuts, and chocolate.
When she had gone, Jenna continued. “‘So long’ is really only about a week and a half, so you should get a grip on the time frame, even though it does seem like a few months. Second, what is best for me is no one. But if I have to have someone, I would rather not care about that person. I tend to hurt people, as you’ve seen. I drain people with all my problems and…interesting behavioral idiosyncrasies. It’s just too hard to bare my soul, and then try to act like a hard-ass, you know? I’m not that talented.”
“It’s hard to believe you’d be too much for me when I nearly broke your neck in response to your trying to be cute.”
“Uh, yeah, I guess that’s true. But still, I can’t afford to go soft in the life I’m living. Everything would unravel.”
“I don’t know what to tell you. I’m lost without you. You put the color back in my life. Against my better judgment for what’s best for you, I want you.”
“Sooo, the test of wills has begun.”
Josh snorted derisively and looked around. “Nice place. You’re not really dressed for it, though.”
“I know. But I always get this corner so I’m hidden.”
“What happens when this corner is taken?”
“Uh, it’s not, generally. Even when it’s busy. I’m a regular. Everyone knows me by name here. It’s my little corner of the world.” And now I am sharing it with you. Her plan to ignore him and keep him at a distance was tough getting going.
“Why didn’t you take more money today?” Josh asked, analyzing her.
“When?”
“When you were haggling with Don. You got less because you wanted the same for Erika.”
“And you think I should have sold Erika out to get more?”
“She is capable of haggling for herself.”
“No, she’s not. She’s not good at it. She’s too soft—she lets people walk all over her.”
“Isn’t that her problem?”
“Are you being serious?” Jenna asked. “She is my best friend in the world. My only true friend. She deals with all my problems. Smooths them all out. When I have a bad memory day, shaking and crying, she is always there for me. She has thrown men out of her bed more than once for me. I owe her so much more than a good bonus. Never ask that question again. Clear?”
He grunted something that sounded like “hooyah.”
“I respect what you did for Erika,” he said eventually.
Jenna was momentarily distracted by an email on her phone. It was the project manager she’d hired for Jax’s house. She made a scoffing noise and put it away for later.
“What’s up?” Josh asked.
“Jax apparently bought a lemon. His plumbing is all shot to hell, his baseboards are nearly rotting out of the floor, and there could be termites…”
“What are you doing with his house? Does he know?” Josh’s voice sharpened.
Jenna felt a sudden stab of worry that the raggedy shack was an heirloom or something. “Erika said it was the pits, and as his reward it should be fixed up.”
“A reward?”
“He got her through that week alive. I promised a handsome reward.”
Josh’s mask melted into a look of disbelief.
“What?” Jenna asked. “You were there; you heard it. When I give my word, I stick to it.”
“So you’re doing what with his house?”
“Remodeling. Well, hell, with the structural problems I am basically going to have to rebuild from the ground up. Why? Has it been passed down through eight generations or something? I’m not supposed to change its integrity?”
“No, not at all. You could demolish the whole thing and start over for all he cares. But he didn’t come from much. All his savings went into that house. He’s proud. Too proud to accept a loan from me to get it fixed like it should be.”
“Well, didn’t he get lucky.”
“You spend your money easily.”
“I have enough put away for retirement and I earn a bunch, so why not? Why not use it while I’ve got it? I’m not saving it for kids or anything.”
“You don’t want kids?”
Jenna shrugged. “Not without being married—call me old-fashioned—and I don’t see that happening.”
Josh looked at her for a long moment. “I want kids.”
“Good for you.”
“I want you to bear them.”
Jenna choked into her glass and came up sputtering. “I need a lot more of this”—she held up her glass—“before you start talking like that. And please let me remind you, we don’t really talk like that to women where I’m from.”
Josh shrugged with a smile, which bubbled over into a laugh. “It’s true. Just sayin’ it like I feel it.”
“Well, for both our sakes, please stop.”
Josh kept laughing. Several heads turned his way. The women’s gazes stuck like glue, their eyes then roving over his face and dipping down to his body. Jenna was one of them. Dressed up like he was, his good humor made him one of the most handsome men she had ever seen. He should be on the big screen, delighting the world.
They drank another glass of wine without saying much. What happened earlier was weighing on Josh, judging by how often he looked at his hands with a frown. When Jenna could stall no longer, she got the bill.
Josh reached for his wallet.
“It’s paid,” Jenna said, filling in the tip and pushing it away. “I have a card on file.”
Confusion registered on Josh’s face, but he didn’t comment. Outside on the sidewalk, he looked up at her from under his lashes. An uncomfortable pang hit Jenna. She didn’t really want Josh coming home with her. The lines between them were blurred enough as it was; she didn’t want to let him into that last line of defense, that last secret place.
She cleared her throat. “Um, where are you staying while you’re here?”
“Hotel.”
Damn. After all the hospitality he’d showed her in Colorado, without really knowing her, she was sending him back to a hotel. After he’d saved her life. More than once.
It didn’t take a letter to Miss Manners to know she was being an ass.
“I’m sure Erika would let you stay with her…” Jenna offered, hating how she sounded.
“I’m sure she would, but I didn’t want to intrude.”
“She wouldn’t think of it as intruding. As my opposite, she doesn’t have those kinds of issues.”
“Then there’s Jax.” Josh put a hand in his pocket, a dangerous GQ model pose.
She fidgeted, remembering what was under those expensive clothes. Remembering how it felt against her bare skin. “He would mind if you stayed?”
“He tends to walk around naked an awful lot.”
“And he wouldn’t rein himself in for you?”
“He wouldn’t see the need.”
“Ah. Yes, I can see how that would…deter you.” She blew out a breath. “Well…”
“I’ll see you home, and then I’ll bid you goodnight.”
She bit her lip several times on the short, silent walk to her apartment. As they grew nearer, she paused suddenly and swore. She’d left all the bags at work.
“What is it?” Josh asked quietly, his voice deep and soothing.
She glanced back in the direction of the office. It was too late, and too far away, to walk. Cabs would take too long, too. She was starting to unravel in Josh’s presence—she needed distance.
“Nothing,” she said, finishing the walk to her home. She’d just change in the bathroom at work tomorrow.
In front of her steps, she hesitated.
Josh didn’t. He hugged her, wrapping her in his warmth and kissing her on the
forehead, before wishing her goodnight.
Guilt ate through her middle.
“You see,” she said, “the thing is, I don’t usually invite people back to my house, you know? It’s private. It’s my own little sanctuary.”
“No problem, Jenna. I’ll see you tomorrow. Stay inside and I’ll meet you back here in the morning.”
Josh gave her a little smile of understanding and headed away down the empty sidewalk.
Jenna turned to the steps. Her legs felt like they weighed a thousand pounds. Guilt chewed its way out of her middle and consumed her whole body.
“Josh,” she called, and watched him stop and turn. “Stay with me. You can stay in the spare bedroom. But no funny business.”
He didn’t move for a moment. Part of her didn’t think he would, relieving and hurting her at the same time. Eventually he started back toward her, his slow steps bringing him closer. Her heart sped up.
“Jenna, I don’t need a place to stay,” he said quietly. Intimately.
This is a really bad idea. “I know, but you’d have to take a cab there and back, or walk. And if you walk you might get lost…”
“I’m not a child. I can find my way in a city.”
“Still.”
After another pause, he said, “I’d love to stay with you. But I don’t have any of my things.”
“You can bring ’em tomorrow.” She put her finger in the air. “No funny business.”
“Shoe’s on the other foot, huh?” His voice was soft, like his eyes.
Jenna didn’t want to deal with the feelings that were welling up, so she turned.
As she opened the door to her apartment, a moment of worry stilled her movements. It was rare for someone to come back to her place. Even Lewis had only been there once, for a drunken night of sex and sleep, and then she’d tossed him out early. She didn’t let anyone hang around besides Erika.
She stepped across the threshold and nearly caught her breath as he followed. Her inner world, the physical walls that paralleled her mental ones, had all been breached by this man. His smell tickled her nose as he stepped inside. His size and manliness imposing upon her.
Unexpected Guardian (Skyline Trilogy Book 3) Page 6
