Her insides twisted. She hated that he was right and that she should have known better. She should have questioned Oswy’s excuses more closely, and seen if he really had no fine flour or not. ‘He was always very loyal to my father and even to my husband. Before now, he always delivered the flour early. It was only when I wanted to make a treat for Merri’s birthday that I discovered he had not bothered to hold any back for me. I was supposed to make do with the ordinary sort.’
‘Then it is well you have me.’
A tiny piece of her died. For one wild heartbeat, she’d hoped that he was indeed the answer to her problems. But it was far too good to be true.
Her luck didn’t run to handsome warriors appearing suddenly and rescuing her. She wasn’t even certain she wanted rescuing. And there was that nagging doubt in the back of her mind. What had Valdar called out in his fever? Perhaps in his language they had different names for the saints, and he had been praying? That must be what it was. He didn’t behave like an uncouth barbarian. But where precisely was Raumerike?
‘You must know that I don’t have the gold to pay you.’
All the warmth drained from his eyes. ‘Did I ask for any payment? My life is payment enough. I will stay until the harvest. My new role will give me ample time to return to health and get my full strength back. The sea nearly claimed me. I can never repay the debt I owe you.’
‘Merri talked about you. Oswy gave me a garbled version.’ Alwynn put a hand to her head. Valdar would stay without asking for gold. A large part of her wanted to shout for joy. Miracles could happen. But she’d learnt to distrust miracles.
‘It matters for nought.’
‘I’ve no idea how far the tale has gone. Or even the precise nature of the tale. I can’t believe she did this to me.’
He waved a hand. ‘She is young and had an adventure. It is to be expected. This way is better than hiding and jumping at every little noise, yes? There is a reason for me to be here.’
She narrowed her gaze. Was he speaking about her? She didn’t hide. She simply found reasons to be in the garden, where things were peaceful. ‘What way?’
‘Me being your steward until the autumn. It solves your problem and mine.’ He held out his hand. ‘Is it a bargain? I will get you your due without fear or favour. You can trust me.’
Alwynn regarded his long fingers. There were so many reasons why she should refuse. She had gone against Edwin’s direct orders. She had no idea who Valdar truly was, but she had little choice but to trust him. And it wasn’t as if she was inviting him into her life for ever.
Her heart gave a little protest, but she silenced it. She was being practical. She could keep him at arm’s length. There would be no repeat of last night’s kiss, as much as her body might desire it.
Her hand reached towards his. ‘Until the autumn, then.’
Valdar held Alwynn’s hand in his for a few heartbeats longer than he needed to. Silently he apologised for the slight deception about his origins, but it was necessary. He couldn’t risk being branded a raider when he had no intentions of raiding. He hated that her hand felt right in his. There was no good hoping for a future when there was none for him here in this place. And he could make the meeting with Ash Hringson, particularly if he travelled by sea rather than going overland.
She withdrew her hand and her cheeks glowed pink. He wondered about his strange dream of kissing her in the sea. He dismissed it as being fanciful. She was his employer now and even more off limits.
‘There, it didn’t hurt too much, did it?’
She gave a half-smile. ‘It didn’t hurt at all.’
‘I will stay at the cottage with your nurse,’ he said before she had the chance to dictate terms. When not at work, he had to be prudent and guard his privacy. ‘When I take up my duties, I will come to your hall. For now the rumour of me should send the goods flowing in. A way to find out who has been honest and who has not.’
A faint crease appeared between her brows. ‘I fear you might be right.’
‘Fear?’
‘I used to think the best of everyone, but I learnt that was impossible. That innocence has gone.’ She gestured with her hand. ‘Long gone. Today is one more lesson in a long line of lessons. When will I start to learn? I want to trust, but every time I’m betrayed.’
His fingers itched to reach out and smooth the worry lines from her forehead. He kept them resolutely at his side. He was not going to become involved with her. He had given Kara his heart and she had only wanted to use him. He had no idea what Alwynn wanted from him. All he knew was that he wanted to protect her and pay back his debt. Then he would leave. This time, his heart would play no part. He was behaving no differently than if she was a man.
A tiny voice in the back of his brain called him a liar, but he chose to ignore it.
‘A healthy scepticism can be a good thing.’
‘I wanted to believe that everyone was honest and no one would seek to take advantage of a widow.’ She screwed up her nose. ‘I feel naive.’
‘Not everyone is a cheat.’
‘Oswy swore to me only last week that he had no fine flour left. And when he thinks I will marry a warrior, suddenly there is fine flour.’
‘And he will do the right thing.’ He gave in to temptation and touched her shoulder. Her flesh trembled under the thin cloth. He let her go. ‘More than the right thing.’
‘I wish I felt that way.’
‘Remember, in the end he didn’t cheat. He decided his interests were better served in standing with you than standing with someone else. Do you know who might have enticed him? It is not easy for a miller to travel.’
Her jaw jutted forward. ‘I have a good idea who might have induced him. Lord Edwin.’
‘Then your quarrel is with him rather than Oswy.’ He stared over her shoulder. ‘My father used to say that if you were going to fight, make sure you fight the right person.’
He gave an inward smile. Even now, years later, he could hear the exact intonation of his father’s voice as his mother patched up his knuckles from a fight. Valdar had questioned why his father had attacked a farmer rather than the sell-sword who had taunted him. Oswy was like the sell-sword. Alwynn’s problem was with his master.
She blinked up at him. The dark lashes were the perfect foil to her green-grey storm-tossed eyes. ‘You think I shouldn’t punish Oswy?’
‘What good will it do? He has paid you what he owes with only a slight delay and I know not to be taken by his excuses in the future. The fine flour might have been genuinely mislaid. And rumours of betrothals always swirl when there is a beautiful widow involved.’
The faintest pink coloured her cheeks. ‘I suppose you are right...about giving him the benefit of the doubt, I mean. I must assure you, though, that I am no beauty.’
‘How might this Lord Edwin seek to destroy you?’ he asked instead, trying to focus on why he was here and not on the shape of her mouth. ‘What will he do next?’
With Kara, it had been relatively straightforward about who the rival for her estate was. Was it so simple with Alwynn? Could he do this one thing for her before he left? He hated to think that she might be alone without any male support. He had seen what could happen.
She shook her head. ‘Your fight is not with him. You are merely here to make sure all my rent is collected on time. If that is done, he won’t be able to touch me.’
‘And next year? Or the year after that?’
‘Let me worry about that. One harvest at a time.’
The sunlight caught her hair. It wasn’t just black but many different shades of brown and black intermingled. He itched to reach out and capture it. He wanted to pull her into his arms and whisper that she should trust him to do the right thing. And yet if she knew the truth about his origins, she would flee.
‘And if it comes to a fight?’ he asked instead.
‘You will need your sword back if you are to be my steward.’
‘I have no plans to put anyone
to the sword.’ He clenched a fist and thought of how his father had acted—the men he’d put to death for less. He and his brother both had vowed not to be like that. And they had both succeeded. Their farms prospered. His sister-in-law proved more than equal to the task of looking after the farms when he was away. But everyone knew when he returned that he would insist on a full accounting. ‘The threat of violence is often more powerful than actual violence.’
‘But it is a symbol.’ Without waiting for an answer, she hurried away. ‘Wait here.’
Before he could protest, she had gone.
When she returned, she carried his sword. She held it out to him, balanced on outstretched arms. He tilted his head to one side. Horik had been with him when he purchased the sword. They had laughed about the many battles they would fight together. Someone needed to avenge his shade. Valdar could not start afresh until he’d laid his past to rest. The gods had spared him for a reason. If he forgot that, he would be in trouble. He had a second chance to make things right. He would not be granted a third one.
‘What is this for?’ he asked.
‘A steward needs to command respect. You should wear your own sword.’
Its hilt gleamed in the bright sunshine. Something deep within him twisted. She trusted him with a weapon and it meant more than he thought it would.
He took it and fastened it around his middle. Its familiar weight gave him comfort, but it also reminded him of his duty towards Horik and the others. He would avenge their deaths.
‘Thank you.’
Her lips turned up into a heart-stopping smile. Alwynn was the loveliest woman he had ever seen. Had he truly kissed them? Had she kissed him back or was it a drug-induced fantasy like his dream about Horik rising from the grave had been?
He fought against the urge to pull her into his arms and sample them, just to see if it had been a dream or not. He wanted it to have been real. And he did not want to think about how she’d look when she discovered his true identity. It made no difference now. Girmir and the rest were long gone. They would not have time to return and raid. Alwynn was safe.
‘I trust you will only use it when necessary. The people around here are simple folk and they have good hearts.’
‘For defensive purposes only,’ he promised.
Her mouth parted as if she wanted to say more. ‘How long before you are fit enough to take up your duties?’
‘A day or two.’ He tested his sides. His ribs pained him, but he’d suffered worse. He tried a practised swipe with his sword and nearly dropped it. Hopefully he wouldn’t encounter this Lord Edwin any time soon. ‘Now, shall we go and introduce me properly to your old nurse? Or do you wish her to think ill of me?’
‘Gode is a law unto herself.’
‘She reminds me of her previous charge.’
Her green eyes met his. It would be possible to drown in them. ‘She has a far sharper tongue than me. And her outlook on life is unconventional. It becomes worse the older she gets.’
He nodded. ‘I will bear that in mind.’
Alwynn held out her hands and her eyes became huge pools. ‘Valdar...she doesn’t need to know how I found you. Keep it from her.’
‘And my bruises? I suspect the only reason Oswy didn’t comment was because I remained in the shadows.’
‘She won’t ask. She is like that. Gode is precious to me. I won’t have anyone else lying for me...and risking their lives for me.’
‘Why don’t you believe you are worth it?’
‘What I believe is that Lord Edwin is a dangerous enemy.’
Giving in to an impulse, Valdar reached out and straightened her head covering. She didn’t flinch or recoil from his touch. And he knew he wanted to do more than his duty to his dead comrades. He wanted to make everything right for the woman who had saved him. ‘That is your responsibility, but I’ve no intention of lying. If she asks a direct question, I will answer, but if she doesn’t, there is no need to trouble her. Do you understand?’
Chapter Five
When Alwynn arrived back at the hall, everywhere she went, the servants forgot their tasks, fell silent and stared at her. Then they started to work harder than she had seen them work for many a month.
Her stomach knotted. How far had the rumour about her impending marriage reached? Merri had played her last trick. A man’s life was at stake.
She looked neither left nor right, but continued on until she reached the stables, where she discovered Merri grooming Purebright.
‘Why did you tell Oswald such a wicked lie?’ Alwynn asked Merri before the young girl had the chance to open her mouth.
‘About what?’ Her cheeks coloured as Alwynn continued to stare at her. ‘What have I done this time? I swear, Al, I’ve only been here with Purebright.’ She laid a hand on Purebright’s now-gleaming white flank. ‘He takes for ever to get clean.’
‘About Valdar. Why have you spread such gossip? We had agreed to keep his presence a secret until...until I decided what to do with him.’ Alwynn winced. ‘Anyway, it is not a subject for idle chit-chat and telling your friends.’
‘Is that my warrior’s name?’ Merri’s eyes gleamed. ‘It sounds lovely. Is he about to leave? Is there any way we can get him to stay? This estate needs a warrior. Everyone says so.’
‘Merri! You promised to keep silent!’
‘I never said anything to anyone,’ Merri protested. Her cheeks turned bright pink, the way they always did when Alwynn caught her doing something that she wasn’t supposed to. ‘Not about how we found him or anything!’
‘Then why did Oswy think I was about to marry a warrior? How did he know where to find me? Why did all the servants stare at me when I arrived back? I swear...’
Merri went white and then red. ‘Don’t take Purebright away from me.’
‘I want the truth, Merri, and then I will decide. Any young lady who is able to look after a pony should be able to keep her word.’
‘Oswald was teasing me three days ago. He said that we were going to have to leave this hall by the autumn because you would never be able to pay the render on time. Lord Edwin had seen to it. So I said you were going to marry an atheling!’ Merri put a hand on her hip. ‘And to think I swore him to secrecy on the bones of St Oswald. Do you think he knows what can happen to oath-breakers?’
‘Three days ago, you told a tall tale.’ Alwynn pinched the bridge of her nose. Sometimes getting to the bottom of Merri’s tales made her feel as if she had stepped into a bard’s tale. ‘But did you also tell him about Valdar? How did Oswy know where to find me?’
‘Oswald called me a liar about the marriage. And I said he’d know the truth when you gave me Purebright.’ Merri patted the pony. ‘Only I never expected you to give me Purebright. So some of it is your fault, really.’
Alwynn put her hand to her head, trying to puzzle things out. Sometimes, with Merri, she could never understand the true course of events. ‘I wish you had warned me.’
‘But then you might not have given me Purebright. And I bet Oswy had gone to check with Gode. Gode always knows what is happening at the hall, particularly with you.’
Alwynn pinched the bridge of her nose. Merri consistently figured out ways to twist everything to her advantage. But it did make sense why Oswy had appeared when he did. Gode often seemed to know what was happening up at the hall before it became public knowledge.
‘Will you be marrying him, then?’
‘Who?’
Merri rolled her eyes. ‘My warrior, of course. Who else? I think I shall call him Valdar the Valiant.’
‘I’m not marrying anyone,’ Alwynn said, attempting to regain control of the conversation. ‘But Valdar will be acting as my steward for the summer.’
‘Hooray! That means he isn’t leaving right away and I can show him all sorts of things.’ Merri sobered. ‘Oswald says that there are Northmen here. A ship with a broken mast.’
All the air seemed to leave Alwynn’s lungs. Northmen here? They could have already
started burning and looting. She struggled to keep her composure as her heart began to beat far too fast. ‘Another of Oswald’s tales?’
Merri shrugged. ‘I asked him to show me, but he wouldn’t. He said it was not a sight for little girls.’ She stuck her nose in the air. ‘So I followed him.’
‘Merri!’ Alwynn’s stomach clenched. She wanted to draw the precious girl to her as her mind raced with the possibility of what could have happened to her. Merri had been the only bright part of her marriage. And once they were married Theodbald had basically abandoned the girl, leaving Alwynn to bring her up.
Drawing on all her will-power, she forced her arms to stay at her sides. Merri hated being fussed over. But in her mind’s eye she could see the girl’s broken body. She had heard the tales. She knew the ferocity all Northmen were capable of. ‘Anything could have happened to you!’
Inwardly she winced. The words sounded so weak.
Merri’s eyes blazed with a fire that Alwynn had seldom witnessed. ‘That braggart Oswald was lying. There wasn’t anything at that old inlet. Not one single solitary soul. He just wanted to frighten me. You remember how he cried wolf when he was guarding his father’s sheep. No one ever saw a wolf.’
Alwynn absently rubbed her temple to get rid of the beginnings of a painful head. She should have guessed. Oswald was notorious for seeing Northmen and the like. Three times last summer he had sent Lord Edwin out on wild goose chases. He preferred things lively, was his father’s indulgent explanation.
‘Thank heavens for that! The last thing we need is the Northmen destroying everything we hold dear. I have enough problems getting in the harvest without the added threat.’
‘But if they were here, do you think Valdar would defend us?’ Merri persisted.
‘Why do you think he would do a good job?’
‘His has the best sword I have ever seen. Even better than Lord Edwin’s. Even better than my grandfather’s before my father broke it.’ Merri paused and her eyes took on an excited gleam. ‘Purebright and I could go on a mission with him. We could be highly useful. I know we could. You’ll see. He could draw the sword of Dyrnwyn and it would burst into flames like it is supposed to when the right person draws it...’
Summer of the Viking Page 7
