by Jodi Bella
Karen turned a few minutes later, pausing at the doorway. "Do you love him, ‘Lice?"
"Yes, I do. Very much."
"Do you trust him?"
That was a tougher question. "I want to trust him," she hedged. "He's never given me any reason not to trust him. It's just very hard to forget what happened the last time I put my complete trust in a guy."
Karen nodded. "Try to get some sleep. By this time tomorrow you'll see that all these worries are for nothing. And you'll be Mrs. Alicia Stephens."
Alicia smiled. "You're right. Good night."
After Karen left, Alicia crawled back out of bed and crept quietly over to the telephone on the dresser. She dialed Luke's number, biting her bottom lip as she did it, and feeling foolish. She knew she wouldn't wake Missy, who slept like a rock, but she hoped Luke hadn't already fallen asleep. She just wanted to hear his voice before she went to sleep, one last reassurance that everything would work out all right in the morning.
There was no answer, and she waited through fifteen agonizing rings. Even if Luke had fallen asleep, Alicia thought he surely would have heard the phone and answered. He was a fairly light sleeper and she'd woken him with a phone call or two in the past. The fact that he hadn't answered told her he must not be home.
Praying she didn't misdial, Alicia tried the line one more time, and sat through twenty rings this time. There was still no answer and she finally hung up with a sigh. Where could he be? He'd told her he wasn't going out with any of the guys, had just wanted to spent a quiet evening at home after supper with Missy. She supposed some of his buddies could have stopped by and persuaded him to go out, and he could have left Missy at his mom's, but she wouldn't have expected him to be out this late. She wished she could call Emily to check out that possibility, but she knew she would wake Luke's mom if she did that and she wouldn't do that for anything, not even her own piece of mind.
She settled herself under the covers, telling herself she was being paranoid, and that there was a perfectly good reason why Luke hadn't answered the phone. Maybe he'd been as nervous as she was, had also taken a sleeping pill to get some rest, and it had put him in a deeper sleep than usual. That would explain why the phone hadn't woken him as it normally would have.
She could feel the effects of the sleeping tablet she had taken now as she willed her eyes closed and her negative thoughts away. She loved Luke, she trusted him, and she was going to marry him at eleven in the morning tomorrow. She wouldn't allow herself to think of anything else.
But that night, she dreamed of the last night she'd spent before she was to marry, and how that night she'd found her husband-to-be in bed with her best friend. Except in the dream, the husband-to-be was not Damon, but Luke instead, and the woman he was in bed with was a faceless, shapely beauty.
In the morning, Alicia woke and looked about her, wondering for a moment where she was. When her eyes fell on the wedding dress hanging on the closet door, she groaned and pulled the covers back up over her head.
A knock at the door made her come out of her hiding place. "Come in," she called wearily.
Her mother and father came through the door, followed by Karen who carried a tray of lightly buttered toast and a mug of sweetened tea.
"Good morning, dear," Alicia's mother sang, pecking her cheek merrily. Her father tousled her already disheveled hair and kissed her forehead. Karen gave her a brief, apologetic smile as she settled the tray over her lap.
"I figured you'd be too nervous for much more than toast, but you should eat something," her sister said. "And the tea is herbal, so it should help settle your stomach."
Alicia smiled. "Thanks, sis."
"Are you nervous, dear?" Alicia's mother asked, looking worriedly at her youngest daughter.
Alicia shook her head, forcing a smile. "Nope."
"Good," her father boomed. "You have no reason to be. I had me a good talk with that groom of yours last night and you can rest easy that he's gonna take real good care of you. I told him he'd have me to answer to if he didn't."
Alicia winced inwardly, sharing a glance of irritation with Karen, but smiled her thanks to their father. So that's what happened to Luke last night, she thought wryly. He ran for the hills after the talk he had with good old dad.
After a few more minutes of encouraging words, her family left her to eat in peace. The toast tasted like sawdust to her and the tea was too sweet, but she forced herself to eat, then to get out of bed. Ignoring the guilt and listening instead to the suspicious voice in her heart, Alicia tiptoed over to the phone again and rang Luke's house. Emily's voice answered, equally as musical and merry as Alicia's mother's. Feeling incredibly childish and silly, Alicia quietly hung the handset back on the cradle, then stared at the phone for a full five minutes, expecting it to ring back.
She pushed herself into the bathroom and showered, admonishing herself in silence the entire time. If Emily was at Luke's, then she was there getting Missy ready for the wedding, which meant that Luke was there too, getting ready. Didn't it?
When she came out of the bathroom, the phone was ringing and it was Luke.
She answered hesitantly, not sure what to expect.
"Good morning, Alicia Marie," he rumbled, and she could hear the smile in his voice. It made her feel even guiltier for her suspicions about where he'd been the night before. "How did you sleep?"
"Okay," she answered, trying to sound natural. "How ‘bout you?"
"All right." He paused and Alicia held her breath, waiting for him to say something about how he'd been out with the guys till almost midnight, or anything like that to explain why he hadn't answered her call. But he said nothing like that. Instead he said, "Only two hours to go and you'll officially be mine. What do you think of that?"
"I think it's too long to wait."
He chuckled. "We'll have to work on your patience once we're married." There was a sound in the background and she heard him speaking to Missy. "Missy says hello and she can't wait to see you."
Alicia smiled. "Tell her I love her and can't wait to see her either."
She listened as Luke relayed the message. Then he said, "Did you call earlier? The phone rang while I was in the shower and Mom answered, but the caller hung up."
"N-no, I didn't call. Why would I call and hang up?"
"Oh, I didn't really think it was you. It just seemed odd. Guess it was a wrong number."
"Probably."
"Well, I just wanted to call and tell you I love you. I'll see you at the church, right?"
"You bet."
"Okay, sweetheart. Bye."
"Bye, Luke."
Alicia hung up the phone, blinking back tears of frustration and sentiment. What was wrong with her? How could she be suspicious of a man like that, who called to tell her he loved her? It shouldn't matter what had happened in her past to make it hard to trust him; she should trust him no matter what.
A few minutes later, Karen came in to help her do her hair and make up, then her mother came in to help her into the simple, white lace dress. When the collaborative work was complete, Alicia looked at herself in the full-length mirror and wondered just who it was staring back at her.
The dress was plain, but elegant, with a sweetheart neckline, full floor length skirt, and lace overlay. The sleeves were cut wide and had small bows on the outside. Small white ballerina style shoes peeked out from beneath the hem of the skirt. Karen had done Alicia's hair into a bouncing chignon at the back of her head, allowing a few curls to frame her face in soft ringlets. And her make up was done in soft peaches and cream, just enough to accent her own natural coloring. She wore no blush though—as Luke had teased her on more than one occasion, she certainly didn't need to use the stuff!
Somewhere along the line, Alicia's father had changed into his tuxedo, her mother had donned the ivory and jade suit she'd agonized over choosing to wear, and Karen had put on her baby pink bridesmaid's dress. Everyone was ready to go, and when Alicia looked at the clock, she was ho
rrified to realize they had to leave in less than ten minutes in order to get to the church on time.
Before she knew it, they were all piling into her parents' rented van and driving to the little church. The place was packed, at least judging by all the cars in the parking lot and on the street. Alicia saw Brian McDogal and his wife standing in an empty parking space, waving wildly at them and she directed her father towards that space. As she got out of the van, Brian's wife Beth came over to help her with her skirt and praise her on how beautiful she looked.
"Luke asked us to come out and save you a parking spot," Brian said to explain why they'd been standing outside in the middle of the empty spot. "He didn't want you to have to walk too far in your dress and all."
How very like Luke, Alicia thought. And a fresh pang of guilt hit her, even as her heart raced and her stomach knotted when she looked towards the church.
The little party started towards the church, and Karen came up to give Alicia a squeeze around her shoulders. When they got inside the doorway of the church and Alicia peeked in to see all the guests filling the pews, she felt so lightheaded she feared she might faint.
The McDogals wished her well and then went on in to reclaim their baby and find seats. Alicia saw Luke turn and grin when he saw them returning, knowing that meant his bride was now in the building.
Alicia's father turned to her and offered his arm. She linked her arm through his and took a deep steadying breath. Her bridesmaids were lining up in front of her, giggling and jostling one another, throwing her smiles and blowing kisses. Her mother gave her a brief hug and kiss before going inside to be seated in the front pew. Karen gave her a reassuring smile over her shoulder. And the music began to play.
Alicia watched the line of women walk off before her, one by one. Her father patted her hand where it rested in the crook of his elbow. He was saying something, but she wasn't getting it all. Something about how Luke was a good man and she was going to be happy. Then it was their turn to appear.
The first step was jarring and Alicia nearly stumbled to take the second. Everyone was standing and turned to watch their approach. There were so many people she couldn't even see Luke at the end of the aisle at first. And when she did see him, standing there beside Brian, Missy nearby in her flower girl dress, her breath caught in her throat. He was beaming, his face expectant and happy and carefree. He looked more handsome than she had ever imagined a man could look, dressed in a western cut black tuxedo with an old fashioned string tie. His eyes glimmered at her, and his smile broadened.
And all Alicia could think of was, where had he been last night when she'd phoned?
Her steps faltered and eventually stopped all together. Her father tugged at her arm once, then he turned quizzically towards her. The people standing on both sides of her began to fidget and look at one another, a few whispering behind their hands. Luke's face fell and Alicia saw Karen muttering something under her breath.
And then she saw nothing but rapidly passing faces as she turned on her heel and fled.
Chapter 10
"Alicia!"
The sound of her name followed Alicia as she fled out the church, past all her guests, and onto the sidewalk outside. The bright, May sunshine made her squint as she looked over her shoulder to see her groom in hot pursuit.
"Leave me alone, Luke!" she called out to him. Now that she was outside, she was at a loss for where to go. She had driven in with her parents, and had no car to hop into for her getaway. She had a ludicrous memory of the movie, Runaway Bride, and thought, where's a horse when you need one?
"Alicia, come on. Don't run from me. Let's talk about this."
She had slowed her pace, but was still jogging away from him down the sidewalk. In a few feet the sidewalk was going to end. She glanced back over her shoulder at him once more, saw how close he was already, and darted between two parked cars out into the street.
"Alicia!"
She never even saw the car that nearly hit her She couldn't have described even the blur of color that flew past her. All she was aware of was Luke's terrorized shout, then a vise like arm that grasped her around the waist and hauled her back out of the street just in time.
He'd grabbed her so hard that they both feel backwards onto the sidewalk, Alicia cushioned somewhat by the fact that she fell into Luke's lap. She scrambled to her feet, but he grabbed hold of her arm before she had another chance to escape.
"All right, young lady," he growled as he turned her back to the church and marched her in that direction. "Now that you've scared half my life away, let's get to the bottom of this nonsense."
She felt her face flame from the tips of her ears down to her neck, both from the curious looks they were receiving from some of the more nosy guests that were standing on the church steps, as well as from the comment Luke had just made. He ushered her up the stairs, past everyone including her family and the minister, and went straight into that good man's small office. He let go of her arm once they were inside, closed the door behind them, and said, "Sit."
She didn't even think of arguing with him. She sat timidly on the edge of one of the chairs that faced the minister's desk, staring at the carpet beneath her feet.
"What is going on with you, Alicia?" Luke wanted to know, and he sounded honestly confounded. She glanced up at him and saw that despite the hard facial features and stern stance he held with his arms crossed over his chest, his eyes were weary and hurt. "Why would you run out on me like that?"
She didn't answer, found that she couldn't answer.
"This can't just be your difficulty trusting men because of your ex. You know me better than that."
"Do I?"
She'd spoken so softly, he hadn't heard her. "What?"
Alicia made herself look up and meet his eyes. "Do I really know you better than that?"
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Last night, Luke. I called you last night at almost midnight. And you weren't home."
He closed his eyes briefly, then a smile flashed over his face. "Is that what this is all about?" he asked.
"Yes! It is!"
Now he was laughing, actually laughing, and her blood really started to boil.
"What's so funny?"
He shook his head. "Nothing. It's just that when you find out where I was you're really going to feel like a little idiot, accusing me of cheating on you."
"Oh really? Well, let's call me an idiot then. Tell me where you were, Luke."
His expression sobered. He studied her quietly a moment. Finally he said, "No, I don't think so. I could tell you, but my plan was to surprise you with it tonight. And I'm not willing to change my plan just because you got your back up instead of trusting me like you should have."
"How can you expect me to trust you when you refuse to tell me where you were?" she cried.
"I expect you to trust me. Period. I've never given you any reason not to. Your ex gave you reason not to trust him, not all of the male race. And I'm damn sick of paying for his sins. It's going to stop here, today. You want to marry me today, you do it trusting me. And tonight, after the ceremony, then I will tell you where I was last night and you'll be glad you did."
She sighed. "I don't know if I can do that, Luke."
His shoulders sagged. "Well, I hope that you can, because I would hate to lose you over nothing." She looked down at her hands, but he knelt in front of her and tipped her face up. "You think about it for a bit in here," he suggested quietly. "I'll go back into the church and try to calm our families down. You make up your mind."
She nodded, blinking back tears. "Thank you."
He gave a curt jerk of his head and stood. At the door, he paused and turned back to her. "Alicia?"
"Yes?"
"Remember that I love you. Think about all the wonderful things that have happened since we've been together. And think about what it would be like if we weren't together anymore."
The sound of the door closing behind him made her
start. She wiped at a few escaped tears and tried to calm her pulse.
His words rang in her ears and she couldn't help but follow his advice. If they weren't together anymore, her life would be so lonely and colorless. She couldn't even imagine trying to find another person to share her life with—she didn't want another person. She only wanted Luke.
Why did he have to be so damn stubborn? Why couldn't he just tell her where he was last night? If what he said was true, she could be embarrassed and apologize, but then they could get married without any doubts in her heart. And tonight she would willingly submit to whatever punishment he saw fit to give her.
She shivered, a delayed reaction to nearly getting hit by that car. She'd half expected him to spank her the minute they were alone, but was so grateful he hadn't. But she was sure to really be in for it tonight.
She must have sat in the minister's office for twenty minutes, going back and forth in her head. She was amazed that Luke was able to keep her family at bay. She was also grateful to him for giving her the time alone that she needed to make up her mind.
Finally, after a few cleansing breaths, she stood and peeked her head out of the office door. It didn't take long to catch Karen's eye and her sister joined her in the office in a second.
"Oh, honey, are you all right?" Karen asked, hugging Alicia hard.
Alicia nodded. "I'm fine. And I'm going to get married today. Can you help me repair my face?"
Karen smiled. "Sure."
A few minutes later, all traces of tears gone from her face except a bit of redness in her eyes, Alicia stepped out of the office. She didn't see Luke anywhere in the throngs of people milling about. But her parents spotted her and immediately joined her to make sure she was okay.
While Alicia tried to reassure her parents, Karen went to find Luke and the minister. Pretty soon the best man and bridesmaids reappeared to direct the guests back to their seats. Alicia's face was constantly enflamed as guests passed by and shot her curious glances.
It seemed to take forever, but finally everyone was seated once again. The line of bridesmaids formed in front of Alicia and her father and she felt the same butterflies stirring in her stomach. The first step this time wasn't so jarring, though. And when she saw Luke standing at the end of the aisle, looking down at her with such pride and love, her heart thumped hard and she knew she had made the right decision.