by Leela Ash
Now, though, it was clear that having a family with a man like Stu would have been a huge mistake. She was becoming very grateful that she had grown the courage to leave rather than nurturing more false ideals that would never come to be.
She sighed and headed into the bathroom to shower, her mind wandering from her incompetent former lover to Gavin. She wondered what might happen if the two of them might ever cross paths and let out a sudden chuckle of amusement. That would be the day. Gavin wouldn’t tolerate Stu for a second. Somehow, she knew that as well as she knew her own middle name.
For some reason, the thought sent a surge of heat pulsing through her body. She knew Gavin was incredibly handsome, pretty smart, and deeply considerate. But there was also something reserved there. Hidden. And yet, she felt as if she could overpass some of those boundaries if she was given half a chance. Why did she feel like they would so easily yield to each other?
The heat grew stronger and she let out a frustrated groan. She had been spending so much of her time trying to cut herself off from thinking about Gavin that now that she finally was, all of the forbidden and unwanted feelings were coming out at once. She finished undressing and stepped into the shower, frustrated. Maybe the warmth of the water would distract her from these irritating urges.
But, somehow, being naked under the water with nothing between herself and her thoughts only made matters worse, and she thought back to the man’s strong hands, and the way they might feel should they somehow find their way against her skin. She wanted him, she was sure of it now. But she was also sure that now was not a good time to want any man, especially after getting out of a relationship with someone like Stu. So, why were these urges so strong?
She swallowed hard, trying to force the thoughts away. But a sudden, involuntary image popped into her head. A thought of what Gavin might look like standing before her in all his masculine glory, nothing between their bodies but electricity. Her heart thudded wildly as she imagined how his manhood might feel pressed against her thighs, and how easily he would just be able to make himself at home within her body…
Naomi let out a strangled growl as her hands wandered her body, lost in fantasy. She wanted this man. There was no point in pretending. And there was no way to get rid of these intense feelings but one … and since she refused to involve Gavin, she would just have to take care of things herself.
***
When she was through with her shower, Naomi dressed quickly, mildly embarrassed about what she had done. She had surrendered to her intense desire for Gavin. But now that it had been done and over with, maybe now she would be able to forget about it. It was out of her system now, and she could focus on the future.
It was time to embrace the reality of a life on her own and become the most capable and happy version of herself she could manage. And that version of herself included being able to take care of the cat issue on her own. If the community wouldn’t help her, she would find people who could. Or do it herself. As much as she was capable of.
She was heartened once she got the idea into her head to grab the supplies from the hardware store to work on building kennels for the strays where she could keep them safe through the winter. The local shelters didn’t have the room for them, she had already asked. But she was already looking into ways to legalize creating her own cat sanctuary. It was incredibly exciting to have a project in mind that would help her utilize her specialty with animals and incorporate it into building a new life for herself.
“Naomi?”
Naomi froze at the familiar woman’s voice speaking from behind her. It was Sandra, one of her closest friends from childhood. Involuntary tears sprang to her eyes and she tried to clear them away before turning around to meet her friend’s eyes. It had been so long. She had been so ashamed of herself.
“Sandy, hi,” Naomi said once she finally felt halfway composed. “How have you been?”
“Great,” Sandra said, her blue eyes bright. “I really didn’t expect to see you!”
“I didn’t expect to see you either,” Naomi admitted. In fact, it had been quite a shock to hear her friend’s voice and now, she was having a hard time remaining in a steady emotional place. Everything had been leaving her feeling so fragile lately.
“So, how have you been? Are you just in the area to visit?”
Naomi gritted her teeth. “No, actually. I left Stu. I am here to stay. Hopefully.”
Sandra’s eyes lit up jubilantly. “Oh my gosh, Naomi, that is such great news! I have been hoping that this would happen.” Her friend’s face fell and then she asked seriously, “Are you okay? I know how invested you were. Was it a difficult breakup? What happened?”
Naomi’s voice wavered as she attempted to summon an answer, her eyes scanning the rows of tools on the shelves of the hardware store. She finally chuckled, swallowing hard.
“It’s a really long story. Maybe we can talk about it over lunch.”
“That’s a great idea!” Sandra said. “I was just here to buy lightbulbs for Hank. You know how particular he is. Especially when it comes to his fish tank.”
Naomi smiled slightly. She did know. She hated that she had been away so long from Sandy, Hank, and their fish tank. But, somehow, that guilt she had been holding onto was beginning to dissipate. Nothing had changed between them. Sandra was just glad that she was home and all right. She hadn’t taken it personally. She hadn’t been abandoned by her friend, even though she had turned her back on her well-meaning advice. Everything was going to be okay. She really could start over.
“Let me just put in an order for the lumber I need. If you’re free, we could go now. If not, how does your week look?”
“Oh, now is fine. There is no rush here. Despite what Hank might say,” Sandra said with a chuckle. It was sweet how much she and Hank adored each other. They had been going steady since high school and their love was still just as strong as ever. It was inspirational, and sort of discouraging. Would Naomi ever find a love like that? It was unlikely. It was probably far too late for her.
The women chattered more as they finished completing their purchases and then made their way out to the parking lot. “Do you want to follow me out to Aster’s?”
Naomi perked up at the familiar name of the diner where she had spent many wonderful afternoons during her high school days, surrounded by good friends and delicious food. She had nearly forgotten about it. “Yes! I haven’t had a patty melt in years!”
“Well, it’s about time to treat yourself, I’d say!” Sandra beamed and climbed into her car. Naomi’s chest surged with warmth as they proceeded toward the diner. The only thing that would make this moment better was being able to share it with someone she loved. A companion.
Her mind immediately wandered to Gavin and a warm flush crept across her cheeks. Why did it seem that he would make a great companion during times like this? She barely knew him. And yet, there was something so warm and welcoming about him. And god, he was hot. He wasn’t even normal guy attractive. He looked like he came from a different world or had just walked straight out of a magazine spread. It was almost irritating.
Naomi tried to focus her attention back to the bumper of Sandra’s car and push all thoughts of Gavin out of her head. But for some reason, his face kept creeping back. Why was he so darned handsome? It wasn’t fair how some people were blessed with all the looks. He probably had women throwing themselves at him left and right.
The thought made her prickle a bit, but she also felt a strange sense of peace. From what she knew of him, he wasn’t the kind of guy to take advantage of that sort of attention. In fact, she would be surprised if he even noticed he was receiving it. He seemed so down to earth compared to many of the handsome men she had known throughout her life. Maybe he genuinely had no idea how much his looks could factor in. Or maybe he was already taken.
This thought seemed highly likely and Naomi found herself feeling immediately crestfallen. Of course, Gavin would be taken. Why was she even wasting a
thought on all of this? She was getting out of a bad relationship anyway. She didn’t need to be worrying about jumping into a new one, especially with a guy who was probably already taken and who she barely knew.
Why did she think about him this way? Was it a crush? Or maybe she simply appreciated that he had shown her kindness and tolerance during a time when she had been vulnerable and in very real danger of losing everything she cared about. If she’d had to walk to the gas station, her car and everything in it could potentially be taken. That was the last thing she needed. And he had shown up and helped her feel less hopeless. And in doing so, had taught her a trick. She was positive that channeling that energy and releasing her resistance to believing that anything good could happen was the reason she had been able to get the help she needed in the manner she had. That trucker had come by right when she had needed him most and he had known exactly what to do, even when Gavin hadn’t.
And yet, it was Gavin who stood out the most. Gavin who felt like the conduit to this miraculous occurrence being able to happen. The man who had reassured her and made her feel like everything was going to be all right. And then it was. And she couldn’t have been more content with the way things had played out.
She shouldn’t keep beating herself up for the way Gavin made her feel. It was probably natural for her to react this way. He was an attractive man. He had been caring and compassionate when she had needed it most. She was probably just responding to him for being a knight in shining armor when she had felt like a damsel in distress. She was tricking herself into making more of it than there could ever possibly be. She would have to relax and stop thinking so deeply into it.
Naomi was startled out of her thoughts by the sudden slamming of Sandra’s brakes. “What in the world…,” she murmured, squinting out the window in concern and confusion.
A tall, dark man was crossing the street, smiling eerily as he stared at Sandra, who was clearly shaken up from the whole ordeal. She had nearly hit the man, and rather than being upset, angry, or even scared, he seemed to think it was funny. How twisted could he be?
A familiar chill crept up her spine, the same feeling she had gotten when standing outside of the house she was renting when she had first stopped by.
When the man finally made it safely to the sidewalk, he stopped there and turned to face the two cars. Sandra sped away quickly, probably eager to forget all that had happened and get to the diner, but for some reason, Naomi paused there a moment, frozen in place by the strange, nearly translucent eyes of the stranger as he stared at her. There was something really off about him. Like, really off. More than just the average run of the mill off. He gave her a strange feeling. One unlike any she had ever felt. Except for once, when she had been a small girl, and an elderly man passed by her and froze, then turned around and stared at her as if she were something he was about to snatch up and whisk away.
If her mother hadn’t been right there shopping and grabbed her hand to walk to the next aisle, she was certain the man would have taken her right then and there. It had been a terrifying feeling, and there had been something off about him too, whether he had wanted to snatch her up or not. Something strange about him. Otherworldly, really. And his eyes had this same murky quality to them. Almost inhuman.
Sandra honked at the stop sign a few yards down the road and Naomi snapped out of it. She tore her eyes away from the strange man, who smirked knowingly at her and then took a step forward, as if he, too, were about to try and snatch her away. But she was an adult now, and she was in her own car. He couldn’t get her even if he wanted to. And she stepped on the gas to prove it to both herself and the strange man who was watching her.
By the time they made it to the diner, what should have been an exciting chance to reconnect with a friend had them both shaken up. They parked side by side and walked into the diner silently, each of them clearly still attempting to process the strange occurrence. Naomi didn’t even realize just how tight her chest was as she held her breath in an effort to brace herself against the bizarre encounter until they were sitting down across from each other and the waitress sat a menu down in front of them. She let the breath out, surprised by her tension.
It was just a strange man, after all. He had been crossing the street and must have been high on drugs or something like that to be acting in such a way. She shouldn’t let it get to her so much.
Sandra, who had been the one to nearly hit the man, was still pale and keeping her eyes downcast at the table. Naomi decided to try and lighten the mood a little bit. “You should have given that guy the finger,” she said with a laugh, trying to push away her own uneasiness and make her friend feel a little bit better about the odd situation they had found themselves in.
“I doubt it would have done any good,” Sandra said gloomily. “He was strange looking, wasn’t he? Or was that just me?”
Naomi prickled for a moment, for some reason, feeling nervous about agreeing with Sandra. If she did, maybe that would make her own deepest fears all the more disconcerting. That there were inhuman men out there, men who wanted to hurt her. She couldn’t let that become a reality in her mind. She was just being paranoid, and they were both just shaken up from the incident. That was all there was to it. There was no reason anybody out there would want to harm her.
Even if they did, she had a strange feeling that maybe, somehow, Gavin would be there to make sure that things didn’t get out of hand.
But that was silly. Was she getting some sort of hero complex about him because he had helped her when she was vulnerable and having car trouble? Why could she not keep him out of her head? It was ridiculous. She wanted him in a way she was almost ashamed of. She couldn’t allow it. It couldn’t be sincere. Not when she was so vulnerable.
“He looked like he might have been a little out there. Drugs, probably. I’m sure he had no idea what year it is, let alone that he was wandering around in the street that way. It wouldn’t make a difference even if he did look strange. Like I said, he was probably just in an altered state of mind.”
“Someone should call the cops on him.”
“It wouldn’t do much good,” Naomi replied, for some reason, knowing beyond the shadow of a doubt that even if the man were apprehended, his strange behaviors wouldn’t be altered. The police wouldn’t do a whole lot of good. That was the sad fact of the matter.
“Anyway, they changed the interior in here a little bit since you were here last, but it is still basically the same place,” Sandra said, clearly tiring of speaking about the strange incident. She had never been the type to want to dwell on anything like this, and Naomi found herself very glad of it. “What do you think of the changes?”
“I had barely noticed them,” Naomi admitted, though that had more to do with being preoccupied with the strange man than the fact that the interior had changed. Now that she gave the establishment a quick look around, she did see a few new things. Some booths had been added to the far left, and the coverings over the lights were more colorful. They were good changes.
“Well, the food is still just as good now as it was then. You should try some and tell me what you think!”
Sandra was smiling now, looking through her menu eagerly and pointing out new specials. Naomi decided to follow her friend’s lead and let herself relax a little and enjoy the new experience of being in an old, favored diner, with a good friend.
They set to work enjoying their meals and catching up, but all the while, a strange feeling of foreboding lingered in Naomi’s chest. Something strange was happening. She couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but she had always known there was something big coming her way. Something that could change things forever. And for some reason, seeing the man crossing the street like that and stopping to walk toward her, felt like an indication that whatever that event was, it wasn’t too far off. She would have to be careful. They all would.
11.
Gavin let out a low sigh and let his bow fall into the bed of his truck. It had begun t
o lose its charm, this life of ignoring his responsibilities so that he could relax and focus on himself. So he could attract his fated mate. The whole thing seemed to feel off ever since meeting Naomi. Sure, he wanted to find the woman he was meant to be with, but how was he going to do that when he kept having intrusive and unwelcome thoughts about someone else? Thoughts that made his body respond in ways that he found almost shameful.
Or maybe it just wasn’t meant to be. He had been considering that possibility quite a bit as well. How could he presume that he was meant to have a good life with a mate when he had been such a fool in the past? Especially with a woman as amazing as Naomi, no matter how much he wanted to be with her. No matter whether or not he was able to believe that they might be able to be happy together. In fact, being happy together might be the worst thing because that meant it would easily be taken away.
He grimaced as the unwanted memories began to surface in his mind. He had taken a girl for granted. He had been cruel, despite his best intentions. And he was tortured over it. Most of the time he could forget it. He threw himself so heavily into his work and in making sure that he and the others were taken care of and that nothing was missed, that he didn’t allow himself the time or the energy to spend on remembering his sordid past.
He sighed and got into the truck, gritting his teeth as he attempted to thwart the memories away. But they were there in full force today, whether he liked it or not. He would just have to deal with them. At least for now. No matter how difficult it might be for him to do.
Trina had been a sweet young thing, and he had been in her class in the academy when they were growing up. Both had big plans about making their planet a better place, and they had become close very quickly throughout their time in school together.
