“Oh, what have you come to Arizona for?” he asked.
Clara looked at him, disbelief in her face. “I’ve come because you wrote to me. I’m a mail-order bride.”
“What?” Todd asked. His face growing red, he turned towards his mother. “Mother, do you have something to tell me?”
“Well, I have kept telling you that you need to settle down. But you’ve never done anything about it. You’re 29 years old, soon you’ll be too old to have children. I only did it for you, for your own good,” Sally stated. Her conviction growing stronger, she added, “If I hadn’t written to her, you would’ve grown old alone and I’d never have any grandchildren to spoil.”
“That’s not your place, Mother. It is my choice only,” Todd shouted. He turned to Clara and said, “I’m really sorry, but there has been a mistake here. My mother has overstepped her boundaries and lied to you. I will gladly pay for your way back home,” he said.
All Clara could think of was the life she had left behind. She had no money, no possession, and no home, nothing back in her old town. If she went back what would she do? Her life seemed to spiral in front of her. She felt her heart speed up, and her breathing increased.
“Are you okay?” Todd asked.
She had turned a deathly pale, and he was afraid that she might faint. He ran out of the room and brought back a glass of water.
“Here, drink this.”
Clara grabbed the glass, her hands shaking so much she could barely hold it. As she brought it up to her mouth, she spilled a bit on her dress. She swallowed the water and it stuck in her throat. Her life was crumbling in front of her and she didn’t know what to do. “I can’t go back,” she said softly.
He had heard her words, but could see that his mother hadn’t. Todd looked at her and wondered why she had said it, but didn’t know if he should ask. She looked too fragile to handle any questions at the moment. He sat down and thought, looking at the woman his mother had ordered.
He looked at his mother and shook his head. “Why did you do this?” Then he held up his hand. He already knew her answer. “I know why, because you feel I need to settle down.”
“Dear, would you like to lay down for a while?” Sally finally asked Clara. Her color was still very pale.
“If you wouldn’t mind, maybe it is the long trip that has caused me to feel so bad,” Clara muttered, though she knew the real reason.
Sally showed her to the room and helped her settle in. When Sally went back into the living room, Todd was waiting for her.
“Mother, you really shouldn’t have done this. Did you see the look on that poor woman’s face when she found out I didn’t send for her?”
“I saw it; she just might be tired from the trip, though.” Sally tried to think of a good excuse. “I don’t feel bad for what I did. God gave me a sign that she would be a good woman for you, so I did what you wouldn’t do and sent for her.”
“Mother, don’t you think it would have been a good idea to talk to me about it first?” Todd asked.
“You would have only told me no. She could be a really good mate for you. She’s older and more mature, but can still have some children. She goes to church every week, and she wants to be a wife like God wants her to be,” Sally explained.
“She may be a nice enough woman, but that doesn’t mean I’m ready to settle down,” Todd commented.
“Todd, have you ever thought that maybe you would never decide to settle down? Perhaps you work too hard, and you only focus on that. You would grow old and be alone. Before you knew it one day you would wake up and find yourself all alone, especially after I’ve passed away and gone away to Heaven. I don’t want that for you. Being alone would be horrible,” Sally explained.
Though he wanted to be angry at his mother, he tried to look at it from her point of view. She was only trying to take care of him, make sure he was happy. He sighed heavily. “Mother, I just don’t know.”
“She’s a pretty girl as well,” Sally pushed.
“She’s nice looking, I will give you that,” Todd admitted. In the back of his mind he wondered about Clara’s reaction to his comment. She had looked fearful, like she was hiding something in her past. He wondered what that might be, and it nagged at his mind.
“You should at least let her stay and get to know her a little better. Maybe you’ll like her,” Sally finally said.
Todd shook his head. He didn’t like the idea, but something about Clara interested and intrigued him.
“Fine, I’ll not promise that I will marry her, or even like her. As far as spending time with her, I’ll fit it in when I can. But I am not going to give her all of my time.” Todd put his foot down.
His mother shook her head in agreement. “Well that’s better than nothing.”
Chapter 6
Clara sat up from her nap; she was disorientated and not sure exactly where she was. Then the memories hit her. She was in Arizona. Not only that, but the man she thought wanted to marry her hadn’t even known about her. It had been some sort of lie his mother had told. Clara wasn’t altogether sure what was going on. The last thing she had remembered was Todd offering to buy her a ticket back home.
Her body started to shake again as she thought about South Carolina, Mr. Jones, her late husband, and all the bad times. She had been so happy to escape a past that seemed to be closing in around her each day.
Clara wondered why she had been put through so much when she was younger. “Well, not that much younger. I had to go through it up until the time that Gerald died,” she muttered.
That life seemed so long ago; finally the bruises had almost completely healed. At least the visible ones. The ones scarring her insides were still there. She didn’t know if those would ever fully heal, but with God’s help she thought they would. She lowered her head in prayer and asked for God to help her through yet another difficult situation.
Please, Father, help me through this situation. It seems like I was lied to and brought out here without this man’s knowledge. I am not angry at his mother for this, only disappointed that I was not wanted. I feel like I should give the money back, but I don’t have it any more. I really don’t want to go back to South Carolina and face those demons of the past again. Put it in his heart to have mercy and maybe some compassion. Even if we will not be husband and wife, perhaps he can locate someone in town willing to buy me from him. A nice man, though, someone who loves You. Or You could put it in his heart to find me compatible. I pray for Your Will in this, God. Please also calm my nerves and fears that are continually coming up. I know that I can count on You for anything. Nothing is impossible with God. Amen.
She was too worried to go find Mrs. Cody or her son. But she felt God’s warm embrace holding her, so she took the steps even though she was scared.
Clara poked her head out of the door and listened for noises. She heard them coming from her left, so she headed towards them. She walked into the room and saw the older woman and the young man that was supposed to be her future husband.
Neither of the two had seen her yet, so she stood and studied the man a bit. He was tall, quite a bit taller than her, and it intimidated her. He had a light blonde hair color and his hair hung down over his eyes, though you could still see the blue dots when he was looking at you. He seemed like a nice enough man, but she really didn’t know much about him.
She could tell he wasn’t too happy about what his mother had done. Clara didn’t know how to feel about that yet. She understood the woman’s side somewhat. The older woman simply wanted to have grandchildren and for her son to be happy. Clara had overheard the comments from the old woman. Sally was her name, she reminded herself.
Clara heard them talking about her and what should be done. When she heard him say that she could stay, her heart was happy. The fear that had been creeping in from the edges was washed away.
God had answered her prayers at least in some way. She would wait to see what would happen between her and Todd, but at least
she didn’t have to go back there.
She cleared her throat finally, feeling guilty for eavesdropping on their conversation for so long.
“Oh, you look much better, my dear.” Sally came towards her. “How do you feel?” she asked.
“I feel much better now, thank you.” Clara smiled at her.
“You don’t look near as pale as you did earlier,” Todd commented. “Is everything alright?” he asked, his eyes prying into hers.
“I’m fine, I think I was just exhausted from the trip. I didn’t sleep very well in the coach,” she admitted.
“Well, I’m glad you are feeling better,” Todd answered.
“Yes, me too,” Sally said. “Todd, maybe you should show her around the ranch, so she can see everything.”
Todd looked over at his mother, glaring. He knew what she was up too. But the truth was he wanted to have time alone with her and find out why she had whispered those words earlier. He wanted to know why she couldn’t go back.
He turned towards Clara and asked, “Sure. Would you like to see it?”
She stuttered and said, “Yes, sure, that sounds nice.”
He smirked at her and led the way. Clara followed behind him, trying to keep up with his long strides. Her legs moved faster than they had in a quite a few years.
“Can you please slow down?” she finally cried out when she saw him putting even more distance in between them.
Todd turned around and laughed. “I’m sorry; I’m not used to having anyone with me.” He came back to her and walked at a much slower pace.
“So how long has your family lived here?” she asked.
“For 35 years now.” He smiled. “My father, God rest his soul, moved the two of them out here a long while ago. He made a great go of it. I only wish he was still alive to see it thriving today,” Todd explained.
“I’m so sorry to hear about your father. When did he pass?”
“He’s been gone for 4 years now. I still miss him every day. If he was still alive my mother would never contacted you, either.” Todd saw the injured look on her face. “Nothing against you, please don’t take that the wrong way.”
“I know you didn’t mean it against me. But I think your mother was only trying to help you out.”
“That’s what she said, too. I can’t believe you’re not more upset at her about it,” Todd said.
“Why would I be? She was only trying to make sure her son would be happy. I mean, I’m not saying that I am the only person who can offer that to you. But she wanted to at least try,” Clara said.
Todd shook his head. “I know she was doing what she felt was best. But I don’t think it’s fair that she made the choice for me. I know nothing about you. How am I supposed to know if I want to even consider marrying you?”
Clara wasn’t sure how to answer that question. As far as she knew he wasn’t interested in that at all. So why would he ask the question? She shrugged her shoulders in response. “I’m honestly not sure.”
“Tell me about yourself,” Todd said.
She hadn’t expected him to say that, so she hesitated a minute and thought. “There isn’t a lot to tell, really. I’m 28 years old, I’m widowed and I’ve spent my whole life in South Carolina.”
He studied her closely. “I’m sorry to hear about your husband. How long were you married?” he asked.
“We were married for 6 years when he passed, and thank you.”
“There must be more about you I should know. That can’t be all. You seem much more complicated than that.”
“I’m really a simple woman. I love God, and I try to live a good life,” Clara stated.
He looked at her again and studied her. “So if you’re a simple woman, why did you say you can’t go back?” he asked her point blank.
She looked shocked. “You heard that?” She didn’t know what else to say.
“Yes I did, and I would like to know why you said it.”
Clara felt like she was backed into a corner. She would have to tell him all her secrets, and she wasn’t sure if she could trust him to keep them. Not that she would get in trouble for them, but she was embarrassed by the things she held inside.
She sighed and shook her head. “I just don’t like South Carolina; there are far too many bad memories there for me. I feel that it would be taking a step backwards.” She tried to keep from saying much.
“What kind of bad memories?” he asked.
Clara knew he was going to continue to push her until she spilled at least a little bit more. He had barely shown her any of the ranch while they had been walking around and talking. He was far more interested in learning more about her.
“Can we maybe talk about this another time? It’s late and you’ve barely showed me much of the ranch.”
“We’ll talk about it tomorrow, but I want to know all your secrets. I can tell you have them, I see them in your eyes, especially when South Carolina is mentioned.” He studied her once more then turned away.
Todd showed her the rest of the ranch in near silence, only saying a few things.
When they got back to the house his mother had dinner on the table, and she sat down with them.
“It smells lovely,” sClara complimented.
“Can you cook, dear?” Sally asked.
“Yes, I can cook.”
“Maybe you should cook tomorrow’s breakfast then,” Sally said.
“Mother, she only just got here today,” Todd said.
“But you should see if you like her cooking,” Sally answered.
“You don’t have to cook tomorrow,” Todd said, turning to her.
“It’s okay, really I don’t mind. I enjoy cooking. It helps me to relax,” Clara admitted.
“See? She likes it!” Sally said to Todd, and then turned to Clara. “You can cook tomorrow then, sweetie, if it helps you relax!”
Clara smiled at the older woman. Even though she had tricked her to come out here, the truth was that Clara really liked Sally Cody. She didn’t know what it was about her. Maybe it was because she reminded her of her own mother.
The rest of the conversation centered around questions from Sally to Clara about South Carolina.
“You’ll find that it stays pretty nice here year round. Though once your blood thins out you’ll get chilly. We don’t have snow; at least we never have in the 35 years I’ve been here. I think you will enjoy it,” Sally said.
Meanwhile Todd was looking at her and shaking his head. Clara had noticed it; she knew he was wishing his mother had never written to her.
She wasn’t looking forward to having this talk with Todd tomorrow about her secrets. Clara wondered how he had heard her? He hadn’t been that close to her when she’d whispered those words about going back home. She’d been so shocked at his words about sending her back; it had been one heck of a blow to her.
“I think I’ll retire for the night, if you don’t mind. I think the trip took more out of me than I thought,” Clara said, standing up from her chair.
“Are you okay, honey?” Sally turned and looked at her, the concern obvious in the old lady’s eyes.
“I’ll be fine, thank you again, Mrs. Cody. I really appreciate your hospitality. Yours as well, Mr. Cody,” Clara said and left the room.
Chapter 7
That night she had nightmares as the past came tumbling back into her unconscious mind. She knew she would have to tell Todd that she was damaged goods. She would have to tell him everything. There would be no half-telling of this story.
It was sad, and it wasn’t something she wanted to relive right now. But when she closed her eyes the images and memories of the past floated by. Some were swift, while others took the slow and painful slide into her mind. Clara didn’t have a choice but to confront the memories today.
When she woke up she didn’t feel any better. Trying to take the worry off of her own shoulders, she turned her head to the sky and asked for God’s assistance. After her prayer she made her way to the kitchen.
Clara really did love cooking. It had helped her many times in the past to forget things that had happened. Today though, she knew the memories would have to be told. However, the cooking could still help her feel better about herself!
She got into the kitchen and her mind went into another world. She sliced up some potatoes, cooked some bacon, and made some homemade buckwheat pancakes. She had looked and found all the ingredients she needed when Samuel had shown her the pantry.
Clara smiled and hummed as she cooked. Amazing Grace was the hymn that she was humming when Sally walked in a little later.
“Oh wow it smells absolutely amazing!” Sally smiled.
“I love to cook; it’s always been something I’ve thrived at!” Clara stated.
“I think Todd will love this food. I know I will. You cooked a ton of it!” Sally laughed at the pile of pancakes stacked high on a plate.
“Well I just hope everyone enjoys it.”
Sally helped Clara take the meal to the table. Todd was just coming in and sat down.
“It looks amazing and smells simply delicious,” he said, smiling. Todd said grace and they all dug in.
“How did you get it to taste this delicious?” Sally turned to her and asked.
“I just added some ingredients that you had in the pantry.”
Todd was eating, no words coming from his mouth. He sat back after devouring half the stack of pancakes. “I didn’t mean to make a pig out of myself, but that was so good! I’m glad Mother asked you to cook. Nothing against your cooking, Mother!” He laughed.
“Thank you very much,” Clara said.
Todd went to stand up and leave. “Clara why don’t you let my mother and Samuel handle the dishes and come with me. We have a few things to talk about.”
Clara stood up and followed him out the door. She almost balked and didn’t go, but she knew she had to do it.
He didn’t ask her about it right away. Instead, he walked out to the field and began working on the fence. Clara wondered if he expected her to just tell him.
Romance: Western Mail Order Bride Bethany's Love -Clean Christian Historical Romance (Western Mail Order Bride Short Shorties Series) Page 140
