The moment he first met Victoria the word lonely took on a whole new meaning. Living without company never really bothered him until he met her. The deep attraction he initially felt for her was growing at a rapid pace and quickly turning into something else, which completely forced his brain into a spin. Being around her was both fortifying and torturous. And to make matters worse, he wanted more than just a few kisses exchanged and a few hot caresses. He wanted all of her, not just her body but her heart as well.
Whoa! Where did that come from?
The realization hit him like a ton of bricks. Could he possibly be that into Victoria? He was falling apart, he realized. Not knowing what he truly wanted but knowing what he desired. How could he have so many contradicting thoughts and sentiments? He wasn’t used to that. Normally he started every day knowing exactly what he wanted. When it came to Victoria he really didn’t know. He was used to living alone and not caring about anything or anyone else but he quickly realized how much he would miss by continuing such a lifestyle.
After all, he had existed for over a thousand years and what did he have to show for it? Nothing. Just a memory box overflowing with painful reminders from the past and the physical scars he carried on his body to prove them.
Tristan shook his head angrily.
If he could just make Victoria his, perhaps it would take her out of his system once and for all. But, would it really work? What if he took her and he wanted more of her afterwards? What if he claimed her body and then came to realize that he wanted her heart, too? That was a serious complication.
There were so many things he refused to think about, but eventually, they kept drifting back, reminding him that Victoria, the girl wolf he’d met by accident that had bewitched him in a short amount of time, was meant for someone else. Sure, the thought that perhaps she was meant to be mated to her own kind had occurred to him before, but to hear her say it had done something to him that he cared not to mention. Was it possible he was jealous? But of what, exactly? She wasn’t his, so why would he be jealous?
Not that the thought of her, lying in someone else’s arms, helped much either. Whenever he closed his eyes and pictured her in her intended mate’s arms he had the strong urge to actually murder someone. He refused to dwell on that ugly thought, but neither did he want to think about her leaving him or vice versa. He wanted to be with her for as long as he could.
For many years he’d drifted from woman to woman, not really taking any of them seriously. The brief relationships just weren’t right for him because he had no connection with any of them other than a physical attraction. But with Victoria, he had both a deep connection and a physical attraction. He hadn’t known her for long but he understood how his body reacted to hers, he knew that he enjoyed her company, and he silently agreed that he felt something for her that he hadn’t for anyone else, ever.
Would it be so bad if he gave in to his feelings for Victoria and risked losing himself to her? It wasn’t like he had something better going. He had lived in isolation for eighty years, keeping to himself in his lonely dwelling out in the woods, researching a reason for his prolonged existence without success. Maybe, just maybe, the reason for his existence had finally arrived.
Sighing heavily, Tristan decided that it was as good a time as any to go back and face Victoria. He couldn’t avoid her forever. Well, he could, but what would be the fun in that?
Chapter Nineteen
Victoria silently waited for Tristan to finally show himself. It had been at least an hour since he dumped her and fled to an unknown destination. After bathing, she had accompanied Emelina down to the first floor dining room, where they ate a very delicious meal prepared by an Rodolfo, Tristan’s on call chef.
Once she had finished stuffing herself to bursting, Victoria followed Emelina on a tour of the grand house, then retired to the bedroom she had been assigned. On the way up to the room, she grabbed one of the few English books lying around the enormous library on the first floor so that she could read it and occupy her mind. Once back in the bedroom she sat on the bed and began to browse the contents of the book.
Half an hour of reading without paying attention to the actual text and she was bored out of her mind, and angry enough to break someone’s neck, preferably Tristan’s. Having no choice but to wait for her unorthodox companion to return, Victoria laid the book aside and opted for staring at the ceiling instead.
“You are the most distracted supernatural creature I have ever met.”
Startled by the unexpectedness of the deep male voice emanating from somewhere in the bedroom, Victoria jerked into a sitting position while simultaneously scanning the room for the owner of the voice.
“Tristan!” she hissed, once she spotted him standing near the closet door. “Where the hell have you been? Why did you bring me here? What kind of game are you playing with me?”
“There we go again with the questions.” He actually rolled his eyes. “Has anyone ever told you that you ask too many questions?” he said with a smug grin. His words did manage to shut her up, if only for a few seconds. “I know I owe you an explanation—”
“Yes, you do!” She didn’t even know what to say to him. She was so angry she could hardly concentrate on anything.
“If you would just allow me to speak, I can explain.”
Victoria settled back in bed and zipped her lips. Though it was hard to beat down her anger, she managed to control herself long enough for him to speak.
“You told me you are to be mated soon. However, it is obvious to me you don’t plan to go through with it.”
He was right about that, but damned if she’d tell him that.
“There really is no need for you to tell me anything.”
Her eyes widened as she realized he was scanning through her thoughts again. “Don’t read my mind!”
“I didn’t.”
“Then how—”
“I can see it in your eyes, Victoria.” “You don’t want this mating to take place, but if you are forced to do it, you will.”
Victoria was downright surprised he could read her so easily. He’d managed to figure her out within a few minutes and she knew that if he set himself up with the task to figure out all there was to learn about her, he would accomplish that without a hitch.
“Whatever you decide to do I will respect,” he said. “But I would love it if you decided to stay here with me for a while.”
She wanted to smile, laugh, cry, but she held back before she embarrassed herself. Spending a few days with Tristan would make her happier than she cared to admit, even to herself.
“And if you happen to change your mind along the way…then that’s just fine with me,” he added, his voice lowering as his eyes assessed her.
Victoria could only stare back in shock. Was he insinuating something or did she just think he was? “What if I do change my mind? What will happen then?”
“Damned if I know.” His chest expanded as he inhaled, his posture going from self-assured to tired looking in moments.
She averted her eyes before he could read the disappointment in them. What was he really asking? What did he really want? He wanted her to stay in his house with him, for an indefinite amount of time, but what was he hoping to accomplish during this time? Did she even want to stay?
“But we’ll take things as they come,” Tristan said with a shrug of his shoulder.
Victoria shook her head. “Take what, exactly? Do we even have an it to consider? We don’t even know each other that well,” she argued, although, what point she tried to get across was a mystery to her.
Tristan took on a determined look. “You’re old enough to know what you want, right?”
“Yes. But what does that—”
“And I am certainly old enough to know that I want…what I want.”
Victoria noticed his hesitation but she kept her peace about it. She had enough with the doubts plaguing her to add more to it all.
“If I had had my way at all,
I would have never agreed to that mating. And I fled because the idea of being with someone not of my choosing scares me more than anything else,” she admitted. “If that somehow makes me immature, then so be it, but I couldn’t go along with it, even if my kind is in danger of becoming extinct.”
Tristan’s eyes narrowed. “I don’t think your decision was childish at all. Why would you think that your decision to flee is immature? Marriage, mating, or however you guys put it, is a serious commitment.”
“One I don’t want with someone I’ve never even met,” she hurried to say. “I’m afraid that my life with my intended would just be a repeat of the life I led under my father’s reign. I know it’s hard for you to fully understand, but I want my freedom. I want to be free to make my own decisions, to go where I please, to do what I want when I want.”
Even from a distance she could see Tristan’s eyes gleam with an emotion she couldn’t quite read.
“I can’t ask much of you. I realize this, but all I’m asking for is a few days of your time. If you can’t stand me after that amount of time has passed, I’ll gladly take you wherever you please,” he said. “If you choose to go the moon, I will find a way to take you there.”
Victoria’s heart swelled with excitement and happiness. She would gladly escape to the moon, if only he found it within his heart to stay with her.
“So, if I decide to leave, you’ll let me?” she asked, cautiously scanning his profile for the truth. “You won’t resent me for just picking up and leaving?”
“If that turns out to be what you really want, no one will stop you from leaving,” he assured her.
“Because you didn’t ask me if I wanted to come here. You made the decision for me and that makes me wonder if when the time comes for me to leave you’ll really allow for that to happen.” She voiced out her concerns, hoping to discover his deepest thoughts on the subject.
“Okay, I think that’s fair.” He nodded slightly. “I didn’t ask you. But I’ll ask you now—”
“Tristan, I—”
“Don’t.” He stopped her before she could say more. “I’m not asking anything of you other than you agree to spend some time with me. If you decide to go back, I will take you home myself. If you opt for going somewhere else, I’ll accept that, too.”
“Why would you want me to stay?” she pried, uncertain of what to do. She wanted to stay, but she wasn’t sure what he wanted.
“For once.” He smiled at her. “Don’t ask anything and just let things flow.” He turned to the closet door and retrieved several shopping bags.
With bags in hand, he strolled toward the bed and it was then that she noticed how well dressed and groomed he looked, wearing clothing that made him look like the aristocrat vampire he truly was underneath. His long white hair was neatly combed and tied at the nape of his neck. He wore a dark suit that outlined his broad shoulders perfectly and somehow, made him look even taller.
“Let’s pretend that you’re just mine. That you belong to me and no one else,” he started, his deeply masculine voice forcing all the blood in her body to rush straight to her crotch. Good lord, the man could turn her on with just the sound of his voice. It perpetuated her body with heat in the space of a heartbeat.
Victoria would have protested, arguing she belonged to no one, but a good look at his face and she realized she didn’t want to argue. She could live with pretending she belonged to him. Besides, would it be so bad to pretend he was hers, too?
“And I intend to have you here with me, but not by force.” His lips curved into the most seductive smile she had ever seen.
Damn him for being so goddamn sexy. It wasn’t fair. She had no chance of fighting him off—even if she wanted to, which wasn’t her case at all.
She decided right then and there to toss caution to the wind and stay with him, if only for a few short days. She didn’t want to think about the consequences of what would happen. She only wanted to enjoy his company. The rest didn’t matter.
“I will stay, willingly.”
“That’s all I wanted to hear.” They both smiled. “Now, get dressed,” he ordered softly. “Tonight is your night and I want you to enjoy yourself. I’ll be downstairs, waiting.”
Tristan walked over to the door and disappeared. Within minutes, Emelina rapped on the door twice before letting herself in.
“I’m here to help style that beautiful red hair of yours.” She ambled over to the bed and started pulling items out of the bags Tristan brought, and gently placing them on the bed. “Now come on, get up, your man is waiting.”
Hearing someone refer to Tristan as ‘her man’ was unbelievably pleasant and she was secretly pleased by it.
***
By the time Emelina finished with her, Victoria resembled a high class celebrity walking down the red carpet as she waited to be photographed and asked what famous designer’s dress she wore. She didn’t know how Tristan accomplished the task, but the man had managed to buy the right size for every piece of clothing, lingerie, and even the shoes, which surprised her.
“How could he possibly have known?” she asked Emelina as she sprayed her neck, wrist, and cleavage with perfume.
“You got me there. That man is a complete enigma,” Emelina mumbled as she inspected Victoria’s hair to make sure every lock was pinned in place by the pair of diamond encrusted silver combs Tristan had brought along with the other items.
“Either that or he’s very observant,” Victoria remarked, forcing a laugh out of the older woman.
“Maybe he’s just a pervert.” The older woman cackled at her own joke.
“Shh, Emelina, he can hear us you know.”
Emelina laughed again. “So what if he does? What is he going to do? End my short life?”
Now it was Victoria’s turn to laugh. “Can I ask you something?”
Emelina nodded her consent.
“How is it that you are so comfortable working here if you know that Tristan is a…vampire?”
“He’s not the first vampire I have ever come across in my life. Some don’t care that much if we know as long as we don’t expose them to those who don’t. The reason Tristan hired me in the first place was because I am discreet and mind my own business. I never ask any questions about what I see and don’t make a big fuss over anything he orders me to do.” When Victoria’s eyes widened, the woman quickly added, “And no, he has never asked me to do anything immoral.”
Victoria turned away from the vanity table and stood to face Emelina.
“Besides, I owe that man a lot. He helped my family and me out of some very difficult situations a long time ago and that is something I will never forget.”
The fact that a vampire could be a compassionate creature never occurred to Victoria. All her life she had been raised to believe that all creatures, even those from her own kind, were dangerous and blood lusting animals with nothing on their minds but destruction. But Tristan had challenged that theory from the very first moment she met him.
Victoria had no reason to believe he would harm her in any way. So far he had been nothing but civil to her. Tristan had aided her, tolerated her, and even forgiven her for hunting in his territory. Those were actions no other vampire would have done had she encountered them. But Tristan was different, from the very first moment she saw him she knew that. So, taking all of that into consideration, why was she still so uncertain of him? Of them? Of his reasons for whisking her off to Paris? Why was she so afraid of what could happen between them?
The answer was simple; he had the uncanny ability to wreak havoc on her emotions. She was utterly, undeniably, and completely drawn to him and she feared that perhaps he only felt physical attraction toward her and nothing more. Her feelings for him were already changing and there was nothing she could do to stop that, but she didn’t want to get hurt. He was a vampire, she a werewolf, two completely different species that could not and perhaps would never get along, and maybe this would contribute to any rejection that came from
him.
At any moment he could decide that she just wasn’t right for him and what would happen to her then? How could she find peace if he humiliated her?
However, if she was going to be honest with herself, she had to admit that he had been the best thing that had happened to her in a long time. He had brought some sort of relief and challenge to her life.
Not only had he ignored the fact that she had trespassed in his territory, a very big no-no in the supernatural world, but he proved that strong attractions didn’t just occur with members of the same species, for he established that he was as attracted to her as she was to him, another huge no-no. If they were caught, there was no saying what would happen. He was a vampire and she a werewolf, in other words, a relationship between them was outlawed.
“What do you think I am?” Victoria asked.
The question startled Emelina slightly but she quickly recovered. “What do you mean?”
“Do you think I’m a vampire, too?”
“No. From the very first time I laid eyes on you I knew you were not a vampire.” Emelina shrugged then reached out to grab Victoria’s hands in hers. “And neither are you human, at least not completely.” The older woman paused for a second or two before adding, “What you are is no concern of mine, but I will tell you this… Tristan doesn’t seem to care, either. When he sees you he sees a beautiful woman who he hopes will give him her heart. What the rest of the world might think doesn’t matter to him and it shouldn’t to you.”
“How could you possibly be certain of that?”
“I was once in love, too,” Emelina smiled. “And I know a smitten man when I see one.”
Truth be told, Victoria expected a lecture from the older, much wiser woman. She expected Emelina to preach on how Tristan was a vampire and she shouldn’t be associated with him in any way but what she ended up saying surprised her.
Fierce Awakenings Page 15
