by C. S Luis
I had always wanted to be someone important or someone special, and when it had finally happened, I didn’t know what or if I even wanted it any longer. Perhaps if it had all been a dream I could so easily forget about it and never bring it up again. But I couldn’t because it wasn’t a dream. Dr. Black or Slater, whoever he was, Q, and the others had left me, and now I hoped for the end of this boredom because that was the honest truth.
I was angry that Dr. Slater had left. Would I have gone with him if he had asked? I had hoped that he would. I probably would have gone with him. He had promised me at one point to take me to New York, and now I wanted that more than anything.
I wondered if he was there now, enjoying himself, putting Milton and all of us out of his mind, especially me. Why would he ever think of any one of us again? I’m sure he had far more important things going on in his life. Perhaps he now had a girlfriend who probably made him forget me.
Why wouldn’t he? What could I possibly give him? Friendship? I wanted to laugh. Who would ever want to be my friend, especially someone as smart and handsome as he?
He was Milton’s celebrity, and everyone wanted to be around him, and everyone wanted to be him and know him. He just had that air about him. I couldn’t explain it, but it was so. And what did I have? Dreams and hopes, wants and longings. I was a mere dream, a mere girl with a fantasy, a silly girl.
When he was here, I felt different. He’d made me feel special, if only for that tiny moment he had been here. And now, he was gone. And so was the moment, at least for me. Was he out there making another girl like me feel special and important?
I turned off the water and climbed out. I grabbed the dryer and started drying my hair. It would take forever; the length had gone past my waist, and I thought it was finally time for a trim. I got dressed, and then I looked at the clock on my dresser and nearly panicked. If I missed the bus, I would have to get Mr. Claypool or Mr. Vasquez to give me a ride to school. Drying my hair had taken even longer than I’d thought. I guess I shouldn’t have been daydreaming.
I grabbed a barrette from the top of the dresser and my school bag off the floor and then came downstairs and found the breakfast Michael had made for me on the kitchen stove sitting in a skillet. I popped open the top and found a veggie omelet. I filled a glass with orange juice and then I grabbed the plate and scooped up the omelet onto a dish. I came to the table and hopped onto the chair, searching for the hot sauce. Nothing like a nice omelet with hot spicy Louisiana hot sauce to make it just great. But when I saw the bottle, I noticed we were out.
“Great,” I uttered and hurried and ate it quickly, drinking the orange juice in one quick gulp. Of course I didn’t finish it, but imagine my surprise when I realized it was freshly squeezed. Sometimes Michael was so thoughtful. I had to remember to thank him for that. I tried to finish the rest as I noticed Michael’s note by the keys.
Make sure you finish all your breakfast, and don’t forget to put the dish in the dishwasher and turn it on before you leave, please.
Really Michael, I thought. Even my dad hadn’t been as demanding, but then again, he’d hardly ever been at home. And when he had been, we both spent time just watching TV together.
I grabbed the keys off the table, and with my school bag over my shoulder, I hurried out, only to dart back, grabbing the glass and plate and putting it in the dishwasher and turning it on. Now I was ready to go.
I hurried out the door, locked it, and raced onto the path towards the sidewalk and took a left, hurrying to the end of the street where the bus usually made its pickup in the neighborhood. From far away, I saw there were still people waiting, so I hadn’t missed it yet, and it was only when I approached that the bus slowly stopped and opened its door just as I came to stand in line.
The other students climbed right in, and soon, it was my turn to do so. I found a seat at the back; a few students were surprised to see me. The stares only lasted a few minutes, and then everyone went back to talking to their friends or messing with their iPhones.
I did what I always did, just enjoyed the ride and looked out the window, wondering what the day would bring. Perhaps Michael was a bit right. I hated it when he was. I was riding the bus as a punishment to myself. I think he sensed I was pushing myself away from everyone for what had happened. But I didn’t want the chance to talk about him, because I feared I’d tear up, and it would be known that I missed him a lot more. I wanted to forget him. I’m sure he had already forgotten me.
We arrived at Milton, and the buses were all lined up one after another; ours was the fifth one. The driver allowed the students out, and everyone moved along the aisle and out the open door. As I climbed out, I made my way to the parking lot entrance, and looked over at the lot for a mere moment. I thought I saw a Shelby. Didn’t Dr. Slater have a Shelby Mustang? But now, on another look, I only saw a BMW pulling up. Maybe I was going crazy.
I moved on and entered the metal doors near the cafeteria; everyone was standing in the Coke hallway, and others were having breakfast and waiting for the bell to ring. I headed into the hallway, making my way towards the main office. Time to report to the big man, I thought, and then head to class. I’d tell him I hadn’t forgotten to load the machine. It was just like any other boring day.
I made my way through the hallway. When the first bell rang, Mr. Vasquez was coming out of the office door. I noticed how he stopped when he saw me. He looked shocked to see me, and I didn’t understand why.
“Good morning, Claudia,” he managed. He seemed to want to go back into the office, but realizing I had seen him, he just stood there gazing speechlessly back at me. It was very strange. Maybe it wouldn’t be a boring day after all.
“Good morning, Mr. Vasquez. Are you alright?”
He looked excited; trying to consider my question, like he knew something no one else did but wanted to share it.
“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” He asked apprehensively.
I looked into the office and spotted Ms. Erickson at her desk. I could see Mr. Claypool going into the office at the far left. The office had always been empty, and now I wondered what he was doing. I found Mr. Vasquez staring back at me, and I saw something in his eyes, uneasiness, and then Dr. Slater appeared in his mind. I gasped, and he blinked; perhaps he realized he had given it away.
I hurried forward and pulled open the assistant principal’s office door and hurried inside, nearly stumbling into Mr. Claypool. That’s when he saw me. He moved to the side, and I caught sight of Dr. Slater standing behind the desk. He seemed to be coming from around his desk when I walked in, and I simply stood there staring at him from the entrance of his office.
“I guess we can always start tomorrow,” Mr. Claypool said as he moved back, and I stepped forward into the office. “I’ll let you two catch up.” he said once more and walked out the door, leaving Dr. Slater and I alone.
I was trembling, my lips quivering. I honestly thought I would never see him again. Why hadn’t Michael mentioned this to me? Perhaps he hadn’t known.
Dr. Slater didn’t move; he looked like he wanted to speak to me, like he wanted to hold me, but he merely stood there. The aching in his face was obvious. He swallowed hard at one point, and his lips slowly parted. I was in pain myself, hurt by the fact that he had left me, but more delighted that he had returned to me, that he had kept his promise to return even though he hadn’t meant to.
He made an effortless motion to speak, but I gave him no time as I raced into his arms and grabbed a tight hold of him, wrapping my arms around him, praying he was real. His warmth, his cologne, everything overwhelmed me, and I started to cry. God, he was real! He was real, and he was back!
I pulled away and gazed at him in disbelief, sobbing like a child not wanting to let him go. His hand caressed the wet of my cheek and began to wipe away at the foolish tears on my face.
“I hoped and prayed that someday you’d come back, that I would get to see you again, that you hadn’t forgotten me,” I softly
said and grabbed hold of him again. I didn’t want to ever let him go, afraid that he would leave me again.
Did he feel the same way? Was he waiting, longing for my smile and my words as I was with him? I wanted to know. I wanted to hear his thoughts, but I couldn’t, and it made me desperate for them even more.
God, why couldn’t I hear his thoughts like I longed for? Why? I wanted him to say that he’d missed and cared about me, and had come back for me.
“I couldn't stay away. I missed you both,” he said, referring to Michael and me, and then he added, “It’s impossible to forget someone like you.” He wiped at my eyes, but all I wanted to hear was that he missed me and that’s why he’d returned.
“Did you really miss me?” I asked. I just wanted to hear it from his lips.
“Every minute of every day…you’re all I thought of,” he answered. It made me rejoice, and I blushed, smiling at him. Was he being honest with me or kind because it was what I wanted to hear? Oh, why did I ever doubt him?
“I thought you had forgotten all about me,” I said, lowering my eyes and looking away. “I know you have a lot more going on in your life. And you probably don’t have time to…” But he immediately and very gently lifted my chin and put a finger on my lips to stop me, and then he gazed into my eyes. My heart began to rapidly beat inside of my chest. I loved the way he did that, and it delighted me when he said the words I’d longed to hear.
“I could never forget you; there’s nothing more important in my life than you. Do you understand that? That is why I’m here…because of you,” Dr. Slater softly said to me, and I knew he cared more than I had ever believed.
I smiled and held him tightly again. I sensed him exhale in that moment. "I missed you," I whispered, holding onto him.
He looked at me, holding my face in his hands and tenderly caressing my cheek. "I missed you too, sweetheart," he softly said.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” I asked, and his big grin appeared, and again, it made me blush.
“I wanted to surprise you,” he said to me. I lowered my eyes, and I felt his hand tremble slightly when I did.
“Come,” he suddenly said. “Have a seat. Let’s chat for a while. I want to hear everything about what you have done and how you’ve been.” He pulled me over, and I dropped on the seat facing his desk, and he took a seat at the edge of his desk on the corner. I could see his laptop sitting on the desk, and the nameplate read ‘John C. Slater 11th Grade Assistant Principal’.
“You’re an assistant principal now?” I asked, and he blinked down at me, looking over at the nameplate, perhaps just realizing the truth of it himself.
“What’s the C stand for?” I again asked, and he was still grinning even wider now as he realized what I meant.
“Christopher,” he softly answered.
I quickly smiled. I liked that. I very quietly whispered the name, Christopher, and I think he heard me. It had only been a month since I last saw him driving out of my life, and now he was here sitting at the edge of his desk as our new assistant principal.
“I don’t understand. What happened?” I curiously asked, regarding his reasons for such changes.
“It’s a long story, Claudia. And I promise I’ll explain everything to you soon. But right now, I just want to hear about you and how you’ve been doing.”
I blushed, but I sensed it had something to do with the people he worked for. I didn’t read it from him because I couldn’t, and I hated that, but I could see it in his eyes somehow.
“Did you have to leave?” I asked, and he looked surprise when I said that. I lowered my eyes, ashamed that perhaps I had discovered something he didn’t want to reveal. He didn’t answer right away, and he swallowed and looked away for a moment and then looked back at me and answered honestly.
“I had to.”
“Why?” Did I want to hear it? Was it because of me? Was I insane to think that?
“I wasn’t happy, Miss Belle,” he answered. “I wasn’t happy with who I was, and besides, I missed you too much. Milton has grown on me. You have grown on me, Miss Belle. I warned you that you wouldn’t get rid of me that easily.”
He grinned and winked.
I looked at him for a long moment, his green eyes smiling back at me from his beautiful manly face. And this time, he wasn’t lying. I could see that. I could see it finally in his sparkling green eyes. Had he come back to me for me, or did I just want to believe that?
“Did you?” I asked with a silly smile, and he blinked, and I think he blushed, but I smiled big, and he seemed to recover. He looked relieved.
“Well, I’m happy you’re back, Dr. Slater,” I said.
“I’m happy to be back, Miss Belle. And it’s now simply Mr. Slater,” he added.
“I suppose Michael knew?” I asked, feeling slightly bashful when he stared at me for a moment. He smiled, standing up from the edge of his desk, and he walked around to take a seat behind it.
“Well, he had some idea, but he wasn’t sure. I couldn’t allow anyone to know I was here, of course. He only knew this morning when I arrived,” he softly said, staring back at me; I came forward on the desk.
“I was proud to hear he made principal,” he suddenly said; it looked like he wanted to change the subject. Perhaps he didn’t want to speak about what had happened after the incident and after he had left. I guess he had his reasons. I was just glad he was back with us where he belonged.
“That’s gonna be hard to get used to, though,” Mr. Slater added with a gorgeous smile.
I gazed over at him, and I knew what I wanted to say to him. The thought had been there before, and I knew what I would say if he said yes.
“Dr.—” I began, but then corrected myself. “Mr. Slater.”
He smiled. “Looks like that’s not the only thing that’s gonna be hard to get used to,” he said as I stared at him seriously.
“What is it, Claudia?”
“Did you mean it when you said you would take me to New York with you?” I asked. He sat up and his eyes blinked over at me with his lips parted slightly, but he didn’t say anything.
“If you wanted me to go with you, I would,” I said to him, and he looked surprised, perhaps even taken aback by my offer.
“If you have to leave again, I want to go with you. Would you take me with you?” He looked at me for a long moment, utterly speechless.
3
John Slater
“You’d come away with me?” I asked her, swallowing hard.
“Yes,” Claudia said, and then I realized something in that moment.
No, John, you can’t take her. You can’t.
But she wants to come with me. Bryce wouldn’t know a damn thing.
“Would you take me away with you?” Claudia asked again. Goddamn. Why would she even ask this?
“Yes, but Claudia…I’m not going anywhere,” I said in the most assuring tone.
“You promise?” She very firmly asked, staring right at me.
“Of course,”
You’re a liar, John, a fucking liar.
Claudia smiled. “But we can go to New York eventually, right?” She softly asked.
I smiled back. “We can go anywhere you’d like, sweetheart,” I offered, intoxicated by her.
And she smiled, but this time, she lowered her eyes, and it took my breath away when she did that. I could hardly contain my delight.
“John, it is true! Oh my God!” The voice nearly startled me when I heard it. I looked up to see the only part of Milton I didn’t like.
“John, when did you get in?” I looked up. Karen was standing in the doorway of my office, and then she came in. She didn’t even pay Claudia the slightest bit of attention; her eyes were on me.
“I was a little surprised to hear you were back. You left in such a hurry not even a kiss goodbye--- What’s with the new name change?” she simply smiled but I doubt she honestly wanted a reason.
“It's nice to see you again, Karen. It’s a long story.�
�� I offered, but it looked like one she wasn’t really interested in.
I rose, meaning to walk her out, but instead, I ended up in her arms with her lips pressed hard against mine. I nearly turned red with embarrassment as her tongue pushed into my mouth. I resisted her kiss. I never resisted women, but Claudia was there, and Claudia was my girl. I was irritated that Karen had interrupted us, and I wanted to kick myself for not closing the door. Although, maybe it was a good idea to never be alone with Claudia.
4
Claudia
“John, it is true! Oh my God.”
She walked past me and hugged Mr. Slater, kissing him hard on the mouth. I blushed, embarrassed and hurt at the same time.
“John, when did you get in? I was a little surprised to hear you were back. You left in such a hurry; not even a kiss goodbye--- What’s with the new name change?”
Hurt? I had to ask myself why, but it felt like someone had ripped my heart out. Why? I sadly rose, trying to get up and walk out unnoticed.
Mr. Slater pushed Ms. Stephens back and said, “It's nice to see you again, Karen.”
I sighed in disappointment, walking away to leave them alone.
“It’s a long story.”
“I’m sure you have your reasons.” She romantically gazed up at him. “When were you going to say anything?” I heard Ms. Stephens say to Mr. Slater.
“Karen, as much as I’d love to catch up, I'm very busy right now,” he suddenly said. I was standing by the office entrance, not wanting to look back as I heard him calling to me.
“Claudia!” Mr. Slater very firmly said my name. I turned as he motioned me back with a long finger to the seat where I had been only moments before.
“Sit!” Mr. Slater instructed me. I tried not to smile, blinking as I walked back over. I liked when he did that. I felt important once again, the center of his world. He made me blush, and I felt strange inside.
