Pat, LJ, and I went to Plaza Frontenac to shop. I put LJ in his stroller and rushed through the door to spend my portion of the money Jaylin had given me.
We spent hours and hours at the mall, and when it was all said and done, we had a security guard help us back to the car with our packages. I bought so many outfits for LJ, and found some exquisite clothes at Neiman’s for myself. Pat bought shoes from nearly every shoe store she could find, insisting that, since she and Chad were on a budget, shoeboxes would be easier to hide.
We laughed as we got out of the car and sneaked into Pat’s house to hide the boxes. Chad was in the living room watching TV, so we went in the back way, hoping he wouldn’t see us. But as soon as we came through the back door, he stood before us with his arms folded. Pat shoved all the bags at me.
“Girl, now you know you shouldn’t have bought all those shoes. I told you I don’t have any outfits to match them,” she said, trying to play it off like the shoes were mine. Chad put a piece of chicken in his mouth and smacked.
“I don’t see how or why she would bring all those shoes in here if you two don’t even wear the same size. It doesn’t make no sense to me. What do you think, Nokea? Does it make sense to you?”
I placed my hand over my mouth and laughed. Pat was caught up. “All right, all right,” she said. “I’m busted. But baby, sorry, I couldn’t resist. They had some good sales at the mall. You should go out there yourself.”
Chad ignored Pat and left the kitchen. She told me to have a seat, while she went upstairs to put away her shoes. LJ was sound asleep in his baby seat, and I didn’t want to wake him. I would have asked Jaylin to watch him, but LJ was already spending too much time with him. I was feeling kind of neglected. Since Nanny B had moved in with Jaylin, he was coming over to pick up LJ every chance he got. I didn’t mind, but LJ running back and forth from both of our houses was driving me crazy. When I tried to complain, Jaylin said I wanted to deny him time with his son, which was something I definitely didn’t want to do, so I kept quiet.
Pat was taking forever, so I went to the refrigerator and pulled out a pitcher of lemonade. As I reached for a glass on the shelf, Chad came in and stood behind me.
“Let me get that for you, Nokea.” He reached up and took a glass from the shelf.
“Thanks, Chad. So, how’s the cleaning business going? Pat said it’s been booming.”
“Yeah, it’s doing okay. She’s just spending money as fast as we can make it.”
“Well, you know how she is. Hasn’t changed a bit since you married her.”
“No, she hasn’t. So, uh, how are things going with you? She told me about what happened between you and Jaylin. Sorry that it didn’t work out.”
“Yeah, I’m sorry too, but at least we got that little precious child over there to share.”
“He’s adorable. I wish Pat and I could have some children. We talked about adopting, but she keeps putting it off.”
“Don’t go giving up just yet, Chad. It might happen one day. Seems like she’s seeking all options from what she’s telling me.”
“That might be what she’s telling you, but Pat really don’t want any children, Nokea. Every time I talk about having a baby she just blows me off.” Chad frowned and took a seat at the kitchen table. I walked over behind him, and placed my hand on his back.
“It’ll be fine, Chad. If she can’t have any children, there are plenty of them waiting to be adopted.” He dropped his head, and with true concern, I softly rubbed his back. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. You and Pat have a wonderful marriage. What’s meant to be will be.”
I poured him a glass of lemonade and wondered what was really going on. He seemed like he was going through something. I wasn’t sure what, though, especially since Pat made everything seem all good between them.
As I stood with the glass in my hand, gazing out the window, Chad came up from behind me again. This time, he put his arms around my waist, and touched his lips to my neck. I immediately turned and pushed him back.
“What are you doing?” I yelled.
“You are so beautiful, Nokea. The way you touched me, I knew—”
“Wait a minute,” I said sharply. “What do you mean by the way I touched you?”
Just then, Pat came back into the kitchen. “What’s all the fussing about? I hope y’all ain’t in here arguing over those shoes. Listen, Chad, if it’s that big a deal, I’ll take them back.”
“Naw, baby, you don’t have to. Nokea and I were just arguing over who LJ looks like.” He waited for a response, but I didn’t say a word. I was so stunned that he would step to me like that, I didn’t quite know what to do.
He kissed Pat on the cheek, and went back into the living room. I gathered LJ’s things and hurried to go. Pat noticed my demeanor.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
“I’m fine, Pat. I just got a severe headache all of a sudden. I’d better get home and lie down.”
“Okay, you do look a little flushed.” She felt my head. “Seems like you’re running a fever, too.”
Pat helped me gather my things and walked me to my car. I strapped LJ in his car seat and took off. I was sick to my stomach on the drive home. How was I going to tell Pat? She’d been like a sister to me. But there was no way in hell I could keep something like this from her.
The phone was ringing off the hook as I made my way through the door. I tried to put LJ down before I answered it, but couldn’t get to it in time. Whoever it was called right back, though. When I answered, it was Chad.
“Nokea?” I remained silent. “Listen, I’m sorry about tonight, but I just couldn’t help myself. You’re really looking good these days and I was just hoping—”
“Chad, if you ever, and I mean ever, put your hands on me again, I’ll tell Pat everything.” I hung up. The phone rang again. “Hello,” I yelled.
“You won’t tell because you want me just as much as I want—”
I hung up again and rubbed my temples. This was too much, and I knew it meant nothing but trouble. When the phone rang again I snatched it up and gave it to Chad.
“Listen!” I screamed. “You sorry motherfucker! Stop calling here!”
“Damn, what in the hell did I do?” It was Jaylin. I was relieved, but still upset. I couldn’t help but cry. “Nokea? Are you okay?” he asked. “Where’s LJ?”
“I’m fine.” I sniffled and tried to get myself together.
“Well, you don’t sound fine. I’m on my way.”
“Please, don’t. I said everything is fine.”
He hung up.
I took the phone off the hook because I didn’t want Chad calling back. I gave LJ a bath, sang him a lullaby, and he was out like a light.
When Jaylin knocked at the door, I was getting ready to take my bath. I slid into my robe and house shoes, and went to the door.
“You really didn’t have to come,” I said. “I told you everything was fine.”
“I came by to make sure everything was cool with my son, that’s all. So, where is he?”
“I just put him to bed, Jaylin. You can go check on him if you’d like, but please don’t wake him.”
Jaylin went into LJ’s room and I went back into mine. Moments later, he came in with LJ on his shoulder.
“What did I tell you, Jaylin? You just don’t listen, do you?”
He sat down on the sofa. “No, I don’t listen, especially when it comes to my son. If he wakes up, I’ll take him home with me.”
“Do whatever. I don’t even care anymore.”
“I know you too well, Nokea, what’s ailing you?”
“Everything.”
“Everything like what?”
“Everything like you, the baby, my job, Pat.”
“Okay, so what about me?”
“You just seem like a different person, that’s all. I really thought you would have worked things out with me but you seem to be moving in another direction.” I continued to express my concerns about u
s being together, but Jaylin ignored me. He wouldn’t even look at me, just kept kissing LJ’s cheeks. “Jaylin, did you hear what I said?”
“I heard you. But, I told you what was up with us. I need more time. Still hurting from what you did. Give me time to heal, all right?”
“How much time do you need? I’m feeling really lonely these days. The only thing I do is work and come home to be with LJ. On the weekends I at least had Pat to chill with, but I’m not sure how much longer that’s going to last.”
“Why? Did y’all fall out or something?”
“No, nothing like that, but Chad made a pass at me today and it upset me. When you called, I thought you were him. I don’t know what to do, and if I tell Pat, I’m not sure how she’s going to react.”
“I knew that motherfucker was up to no good. You always bragging on how he’s such a good man, but I knew something wasn’t right. Honestly, though, you do need to tell her. Don’t keep anything like that from her. If she’s a true friend, she’ll understand.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’ll tell her. I don’t know when, but I will.”
“I suggest you not wait like you did in telling me about LJ. You see how much damage that’s done, right?”
“Yeah, I know, but it’s not going to be easy telling my best friend that her husband came on to me either.”
“No, it’s not, but you just got to deal with it and do the right thing.”
After hearing Jaylin’s deep voice, LJ lifted his head off Jaylin’s shoulder. Jaylin stood up and started to leave the room. “I’ll take him home with me tonight. Get some rest and I’ll bring him back tomorrow.”
“Jaylin?” I said, softly.
“Yeah.”
“Please don’t go. Stay with me tonight. I don’t want to be alone.” My eyes watered as I waited for him to respond. I just knew he was going to say no, but when he sat back down on the sofa, I smiled.
An hour later, Jaylin put LJ back to sleep. When he came back into my room, I had already taken my bath and was standing naked while drying myself.
His eyes stayed glued to me. “Hey, sorry, I didn’t know you were—”
“It’s okay. It’s not like you haven’t seen me naked before.” He walked further into the room. “Here,” I said, handing him some peaches-andcream lotion. “Would you mind rubbing this on me?”
He took the lotion bottle from me. I lay on my stomach and rested my head on my hands. Jaylin stood motionless for a few seconds, then sat on the bed next to me. He squeezed some lotion in his hands and rubbed them on my back. I just knew he was going for my butt first, but he didn’t. I closed my eyes, and his hands felt like they were melting into my body.
When he did get to my ass, I was on fire. He massaged it in a circular motion, and not being able to handle his touch anymore, I rolled over and sat up. His eyes lowered to my breast.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
“Nothing, nothing at all. I just—” I paused, and before I said anything else, I leaned him back and straddled him. I placed my lips on his and he went with the flow kissing me back. He bent his left leg, lifting me a bit so I could feel his hard dick poking me through his pants.
Our intense kissing came to a halt and we stared into each other’s eyes. “I love you, Jaylin. Only God knows how much I love you.”
I reached for his shirt to take it off, but he stopped me. He pecked me a few more times on the lips and held my face in his hands.
“I love you too, Nokea, but I can’t do this.”
“Yes, you can. Just let go of your anger and make love to me, please,” I begged.
He pecked my lips again and rose up. “Trust me, you don’t want to be with me right about now. All I’m going to do is hurt you even more. I’m no good, baby. And making love to you is only going to complicate things. I won’t be able to live with myself if I keep on hurting you.”
A tear rolled down my face and I rested my head on his chest. “How can you lay here and not want to make love to me? Don’t you want me anymore? Don’t I even appeal to you?”
Jaylin wiped my tears. “Of course I want to make love to you. And yes, you do turn me on. But I’m saving the best for last. I’m not going to put you in this mess I’m in right now. So please, don’t make me do this to you, okay?”
His words didn’t ease my pain, so I got off him and lay sideways. Jaylin turned on his side too and placed his hand on my hip. “Nokea, you don’t ever have to be lonely. Just call me, and you know I’ll always be here for you. I need you to be strong for our son. Don’t let anybody stop you from being there for him, not even me.”
“I’m trying, but I don’t understand why we just can’t be together. If you love me, then why do you continue to fight this so much? Don’t you see what this is doing to us?”
“Yeah, I do. It’s making our love stronger and stronger every day. It’s making me feel as if I’m missing out on something. Like right now, our being apart is making us want each other even more. I’m not playing a game with you, Nokea, I’m just making sure when marriage presents itself again, we’re both going to be ready.”
Even though I disagreed with Jaylin, he wasn’t giving in. It seemed as if he was going to take all the time he needed, but I felt as if time was on neither of our sides. I fell asleep in his arms, and when I woke up, he was lying on the living room couch with LJ on his chest. They were knocked out, so I gave them a kiss and went back into my room for the rest of the night. I was hurt that Jaylin wouldn’t make love to me; I wanted him to so badly. Deep inside, I truly felt that he was making promises he wouldn’t be able to keep. How could he promise what he did with life being so darn unpredictable? I knew his feelings for Scorpio were getting strong, and I also knew he was still making love to her. So why? I thought. Why not give me what I wanted for a change? Truly hurt, I laid my head on my pillow and cried throughout the night.
Chapter 9
Jaylin
There wasn’t enough time on the weekends to handle my business, so I called Angela and made myself another three-day weekend. Mr. Schmidt knew that I really didn’t need a job, but working at the office got me out of the house. Awhile back, he’d agreed to let me create my own schedule, so going to work on Mondays was eventually going to become a thing of the past. Taking Mondays off would give me an extra day with LJ and Mackenzie. Nanny B was living with me now, so everything was running pretty smoothly.
I got up around seven o’clock in the morning and headed for the gym to work out my thirty-twoyear-old body. I had a workout room in my basement, but I loved conversing with people at the gym. I hadn’t gone for a while, though, because I was trying to avoid Stephon. Since Nokea had confirmed her love for me, that gave me a little more assurance that she really never loved Stephon to begin with. So there wasn’t no sense in me putting off talking to him any longer.
When I got to the gym, I didn’t see Stephon anywhere in sight. He was always there before I was, but I figured he’d been slacking too. I took a seat on a weight bench, and laid back to lift the weights somebody had left on the bar. I strained to push the weights up for the tenth time, and looked up at Stephon. He held the bar tight to my chest, so I couldn’t lift it.
“Nigga, why haven’t you been returning my calls,” he said. I pressed back and strained to lift the weights off my chest.
“Because, I don’t like your motherfucking ass, that’s why.”
“Good. And I don’t like your ass either.”
We continued forcing the bar in opposite directions, and after a few more minutes of intense work, I gave up and let the bar rest on my chest. Stephon lifted it and put it back on the bench.
“See, that’s what your ass get for not working out. I’ve been here every day, and thought I would see your high-yellow ass. I guess you’ve giving up on working out too, huh?”
I sat up on the bench and stretched my back. “Naw... I’ve been working out. Just not at the gym. Besides, I didn’t want to see your punk-ass anyway.”
<
br /> “So, what you want, Jay? Do you wanna fight and get this shit over with or what? You might be a year older than me, but you know I’ll kick your ass right about now, don’t you?”
“Hell, yeah, I wanna fight. Meet me outside so I can finally get this shit off my chest.” I stood up, and we headed toward the door.
“Come on you little Mighty-Mouse-looking motherfucker. And when I kick your ass, don’t go running home to your bitches crying like a little punk,” he said jokingly.
“And don’t you go running home to that bitch, Felicia, telling her my damn business either.”
When we got outside, we continued to rant back and forth. We stared each other down with balled fists. “Jay, I’m gonna say this one more time and one more time only. I’m not going to kiss your ass like your women do, so this is it, man. I regret what happened and I’m sorry. I over stepped my boundaries and I know it. I got straight-up love for ya, cuz, and if you can ever find it in your heart to forgive me, I’d be grateful.” He put up his fists. I did the same, then slammed him in the face with a left hook. He fell backward, and sat up on his elbows.
“Next time,” he said, “bring out some blood, nigga, all right?” I reached out my hand and helped him get off the ground.
“Naw, next time, don’t let this shit happen again. When I tell you a woman that I love is off limits, I mean it. And Nokea, she’s off limits. Anybody else is fair game.”
“Scorpio too? You know I’ve been waiting for her to shake a brotha down.”
I grinned. “Hmm . . . talk to me about it before you do, and I’ll let you know my status then.”
We laughed, gave each other a long hug, and went back into the gym to continue our workout.
I was sweating and panting like it wasn’t funny. Neglecting my workout really set me back and I had gotten out of shape fast. Stephon laughed the whole time, walking around flexing his muscles, trying to make me jealous because he had kept up with his workout. He said that he wasn’t going to let me or anybody else stop him from keeping his body in shape, and admitted that working out took his mind off his frustrations.
Naughty 2: My Way or the Highway Page 8
