Over and over I thrust until I feel the ache inside of me turn into ecstasy and find myself shouting and growling with the release. Panting, I lean over her body and let myself complete the act.
Lola comes back with the condoms just as I pull out of Becca and find myself a bit weak with the amount of fluid that’s left my body. “I’m going to grab a bottle of water and be right back. Do either of you want anything?”
Both of their heads shake as they begin to undress one another and I head off to the bar in the next room. My body feels only a little bit less tense and I know it will take the rest of the night to rid me of all the tension the last week has given me.
Taking the cold bottle of water from the mini-fridge, I gulp it down in three large gulps. The girls’ giggling stops and I find myself wondering why.
“Who the hell are you two?” I hear a deep female voice ask and I know it’s Camilla.
My mind freezes as I have no idea what I should do. Then my brain goes into overdrive, sending my ass flying through room after room to get up to mine and put some clothes on.
Why did I let this happen?
What will she do?
I make it to my bedroom and haul ass to the bathroom to clean myself then run to the dresser and put on underwear and shorts and a shirt. Then I pace back and forth as I scratch my head and wonder what the fuck I’m supposed to say or act like.
She and I have not said we’re exclusive, that’s a fact. I didn’t ask her to come over here, another fact. She could’ve taken care of my needs but she refused to, yet another fact!
With such facts on my side, why is my entire body shaking? Why am I acting like the men I’ve made fun of countless times who are married and dabbling at the parties?
I am not married and not even in a relationship!
So why do I feel this way…
Chapter 6
CAMILLA
“Cyprian!” I shout as I hold his used condom between two fingers. It has been tied up and is nearly full of his semen.
The women are quickly pulling on what little clothes they had on. “His father sent us. It’s not his fault,” the blonde says.
“Oh yeah?” I ask as she seems very nervous. “I think it may have been his fault that he fucked one of you. Is that all he’s done so far?”
The blonde jerks her head toward the dark-haired woman. “She gave him a blowjob.”
“Shut the fuck up, Becca,” the one she called Lola, hisses at her. “This must be the woman he said he was seeing.”
“So, he told you he was seeing someone and you fucked him anyway?” I ask then shake my head. “No, don’t even bother to answer that. He should’ve never done it. It’s not your fault. You’re paid to do this, I suppose.”
“Yes, yes we were. His father pays a lot of us to come to his parties for the weekend and we’re expected to come on really strong to the men. It’s our job,” Becca says.
“I see that. Please, leave him to me,” I say as I escort them to the door. A long black car is waiting outside and I guess it’s for them.
Lola looks over her shoulder and asks, “For future reference, is he going to be a free man again? I mean, just in case his father tries to send us out to him again. We don’t like to get into any kind of altercations with pissed off girlfriends or wives.”
“He will be a free man.” I shut the door and go to find Cyprian. “Come out, come out, wherever you are.”
He’s obviously in hiding and afraid to face me. I stop at the restroom just outside the entry room and drop the used condom in the wastebasket and give my hands a good washing.
I have no idea what got into me when I saw it. I just reached down and picked it up. It was right next to a torn pair of red panties I suppose belonged to the girl in the red dress.
As I continue my journey to find Cyprian, I see the tray of chocolate chip cookies I made for him, on the floor where I dropped them, and shudder at what I found when I got here.
Two naked women, kissing and touching each other. Cyprian’s clothes spread from the entry room to the next room. The fireplace lit up, making romantic glows and, finally, the used condom and panties on the floor, amongst his shirt and the women’s clothes and shoes.
I figure he’s hiding in his bedroom, so I make my way to it and find the door is locked. “Afraid of me, Cyprian?”
I hear the door unlock and he pulls me into his arms. “Thank God, you’re here. I wanted to call you but my cell phone was in my pants and they managed to get those off me. I finally got away from them and ran up here to lock myself away from them. My father sent them. I had no idea. I swear it!”
Pushing his chest, I make him let me go. “So, you were raped?”
“Raped? No,” he says as he steps back. “Molested is a better word.”
“Those little women molested you, Cyprian?” I ask. “Perhaps we should report the incident?”
“No, my father sent them.” He looks at me with a sheepish expression.
“But you allowed them to do to you what they did and you fucked one of them. They told me everything,” I say as I cross my arms in front of me. “And, just so you know, one of them asked me if you would still be in a relationship, the way you told them you were, any longer. I told her, no.”
“We aren’t in one. I just said that to try to get them to leave me alone. They seduced me, Cami! They both took a hold of me and pulled me into the house and had me undressed before I knew what was happening. One kissed me while the other took me into her mouth. I was blindsided by all the sexual stimulation. I couldn’t help myself. You have to understand!”
“I have to understand that two women that small could make you do all that? I have to understand you lost yourself in the sexual desire for them?” I stop and shake my head. “Today was one of the best days I’ve ever had. It was, hands down, the best date I’ve ever been on. You were wonderful. Affectionate, funny, cute, sweet, lovable, and it was all a lie.”
“It wasn’t a lie, Cami! It was real. It was the most real thing I’ve ever done in my life. Being with you, I feel more of a person than I ever have. I’ve felt like a robot, going through the motions, most of the time. Sex is exactly what you said it was, mechanical. An act. Much like any other act that requires a bodily function where you expel bodily fluids. That’s how I think about it.”
“Oh, so what you did down there was just like when you take a shit. You find a toilet, any one will do, and you release yourself into it. Then you flush it all away and no one should even worry about what you just did. It was a bodily function, everyone has to do, in order to live. Is that pretty much how you think about what you just did?”
He sits on the bed and looks up at the ceiling. “Pretty much.”
“You will never be the man for me. You will never be what I need in my life. And I think it’s better I figured that out before I fell head over heels in love with you, Cyprian. Because I could fall so easily for you. Thank you for fucking those girls, minutes after our date ended. Thank you very much for bringing to light that you are not a man I want in my life.”
I turn to walk away but he stops me as he asks, “Why were you over here in the first place?”
I turn back to him with eyes full of tears. “I was bringing you a plate of cookies. I wanted us to share a couple of them and a glass of milk then I was going to leave you with another goodnight kiss.” I turn away again.
His hand on my shoulder stops me. He turns me to him but I can’t look at his handsome face. It’s just too hard. “Cami, I need sex. I need it. You don’t seem to understand me. If I give you the commitment you need, will you give me the sex I need? Then we can make this work. I do care about you and I do love spending time with you. You are my most favorite person and if I lost you…”
“You already have,” I tell him before he can say anything else. “I will not be holding you to me with a sexual rope. I will not be held to you with a commitment that doesn’t involve love. I cannot trust you, Cyprian.”
�
��I go all week without sex. On the weekends, I’ve had an abundance of it for twenty years, Cami! You cannot expect me to go cold turkey, with no idea when I will get to feel the inside of a woman again. When I’ll get to feel, soft breasts, pressed against my chest. When I’ll get to feel sweet lips on me. You can’t begin to understand my needs. I have them too, Camilla.”
“I cannot change my entire way of thinking, just so you can get off. I don’t have sex, I make love. You don’t have real feelings about anything or anyone. Any woman will do for you to relieve yourself in. I can’t handle that. Sorry, Cyprian. You’re asking for more than I can give you.”
I pull away from him and leave him in his bedroom. I’m not trying to punish him or manipulate him in any way. I am merely trying to keep myself from getting hurt any more by him.
Making my way down the stairs, I let myself out of the house and get into my car and drive all the way to the gate before the waterfall of tears overtakes me.
Why does he have to be so damn corrupted…?
Lady Killer Book 4
Chapter 1
CYPRIAN
The horses thunder down the track in front of us. The afternoon is warm and I find myself pulling my jacket off and rolling up the sleeves on my white button-down. “Have a mint julip, Cyprian,” my father says as he passes a tall, slender glass down to me.
I am sandwiched between two brunettes. Simone has green eyes and Joanie has dark eyes, nearly black. They latched onto me as soon as I came to my father’s private booth. He’s now the new owner of Charlemagne’s Choice, a feisty thoroughbred he’s had his eye on for some time.
Joanie places the cold drink in my hand. “Here you go, drink up. I have plans for you soon.”
Simone looks around me, at the other woman. “Back off, Joanie. I want him all to myself.”
“Ladies, there is no need to fight over me. I won’t be needing any special attention from either of you. I’m not feeling it, today. Sorry,” I tell them and earn a frown from them both, and my father.
“Come with me, son,” he says as he gets up and goes to the back of the small but elaborately decorated room. He rests his hand on my shoulder as I meet him. “What’s been going on with you? You haven’t been coming around to the parties. Did the girls I sent you last night treat you well?”
“Papa, I’ve messed up. I met someone. A good woman. A great woman, actually. The girls you sent me, ruined that for me. She wants nothing more to do with me. She caught us. And I am devastated.” I take a long drink of the minty liquid to numb the pain that’s overwhelmed me since she left me.
“So, you think you found a woman? Like a girlfriend?” he asks as he goes behind the bar and mixes himself up something to drink.
“I did,” I tell him as I take a seat on one of the tall barstools. “But I blew it. I should’ve sent the girls away but I let them toy with me.”
“If you had a special lady friend, why did you feel the need to mess with the girls I sent you? Is your special lady not sexually satisfying you?”
I cock my eyebrow as I say, “She wants love before sex. And she doesn’t want sex, she wants to make love.”
His laugh is low and deep as ice cubes splash into the amber liquid in his short glass. “Love? What do any of us know about love?”
“I had to read some books on it. The life we’ve led had nothing to do with love. But I want to experience it. I want to experience it with her. Camilla Petit is her name. She comes from New Orleans, originally. And she is gorgeous, sweet, funny, and amazing. And I blew it, all for a piece of ass. I am morally corrupt, just like she said I was.”
“She called you names?” he asks then takes a sip of the concoction he made himself. Making a face, he looks around the bar and comes up with a single cube of sugar and drops it into the glass.
I watch it melting as I say, “Not exactly. She’s not mean. She’s honest. I don’t know why I did it. I really don’t. I think it might be because I have been conditioned to accepting sex.” I look at my father. “At times I feel like a machine, work, work, work then play, play, play. It matters to me where I make my money from but when it comes to me, personally, well, it hasn’t mattered where I got sex from. But Cami wants a commitment, which I offered her. She refused it. She wasn’t willing to accept the condition of sex being part of the commitment. And I was left alone. Papa, I’ve never felt more alone in my life.”
“You are feeling sad and hopeless, aren’t you?” he asks me as he stirs his drink with a red swizzle stick.
I lean on the bar. “I am.”
“Do you see what love and relationships do to a person? This is exactly why I’ve stayed the hell away from them. You see, I had myself a girlfriend in high school. At first, it was great. Then she and I started bickering over nothing at all. She wanted a hot dog and I had bought her a hamburger. I was thoughtless, she told me.” He stops and takes a drink as if the memory stirs things in him, he’d rather be left alone.
“So, was she your only girlfriend?” I ask as I sit up and listen to him.
“No, I had another one in college. She was smart and classy. The kind of woman you can take home to mom and dad, you know?”
“I do know. Cami is that kind of a woman. Very respectable.”
He nods. “Well, then you can expect her to want you to be just as respectable as she is. That’s how mine was. She hated my drinking. Said it wasn’t a thing she wanted me to do, except on occasion. So, I modified my nightly Scotch to every other weekend when we went to social functions.”
“There’s nothing wrong with that,” I say. “It’s a healthy way to live.”
“It is. And if it would’ve been my decision, it might not have started to bother me. But that wasn’t enough. You see, I found my love for the racetrack while I was in college. And she found gambling to be deplorable. So, she told me she didn’t want me to do that anymore.” Another long drink has his glass empty and he stares at the bottom of it.
“She was controlling,” I say as I nod.
“As are all women of that nature. The ones you can bring home to meet the parents are all the same. The want you to straighten up and fly right by their side. They will dress you, make you eat what they deem, appropriate. They will make you bend to their rules of how things must go if you are to stay in a peaceful existence with them. Which, by the way, is quite impossible, even if you bend until you break.”
“I read where things are not supposed to go peacefully in healthy relationships. Arguments occur because men and women see things differently. The key to a happy relationship is learning compromise. But even once that’s learned, arguments will still occur. There is no getting around them,” I tell him as he shakes his head.
“Why would you want that?” he asks as he looks deep into my eyes. “Why would anyone?”
“I guess to procreate. It’s bred into us.” I look back at the ten women my father brought along to the races today. “You want women around, Papa. The women you want around are paid, though. They will act however you want them too. If you want docile, they will be that. If you want aggressive, they will be that. It’s an act. The whole thing, including the sex, is an act. It’s not real.”
“But it is peaceful. There are no arguments. They may be paid and it all may be an act but what isn’t, son? Isn’t life just a series of acts you must do each day? We must get up every weekday and attend to our work, whatever kind you have. It’s an act. No one really wants to be doing it but it has to be done.”
“I liked to go to school and I like to go to work. I find it stimulates my brain. I need that stimulation. I crave it.”
He shakes his head. “I did not. I did what I had to, in order to make the kind of money that would support the lifestyle I imagined for myself. And I made that happen. You came along and I saw my chance to groom you to take over and give me the rest of my vision. The freedom to never work again. To completely relax.”
“And I’m glad I can give you that. I am different, though. I need the
problems and I love to solve them.” My wheels start moving as I think about what I’ve just said.
I love to solve problems!
Could I have made the decision to be with those women last night, in order to create a problem where there wasn’t one? Could I have done that, so I would have to use my brain to fix the problem between me and Camilla? Am I really that person who does that kind of thing to themselves?
“You are different, Cyprian. So, this woman you’re upset about, how come she broke things off with you? Had you given her a commitment already?” he asks as he looks behind the bar and comes up with a platter of meats and cheeses.
“We did not have a commitment, no,” I say as I pick up a slice of salami.
“Then why would she end things? You were a free man. Did you not explain that to her?” he asks as he piles meats and cheeses on a cracker.
“I did but it did no good. She was right to do it. We had barely finished an amazing date. Literally, five minutes after I dropped her off, I was with two other women. It hurt her, I saw it in her eyes. She was devastated. And now, so am I.”
“I can give you some advice. It’s a mental game, one sometimes must play when trying to get a woman. I’ve never used it, as I lost any want to mess with relationships after those two nightmares.” He comes around the bar and takes a seat next to me.
“I’m not into games, Papa.”
“If you want a relationship then you should know, you will have to play some. Now, jealousy is a great catalyst. You want this woman to know you will not sit around and wait for her to come to her senses. She needs to know that.”
“I think she already does. She’s not dumb, Papa. She’s a scientist. She’s extremely smart. She’ll be on to me, quickly,” I tell him, as I’m skeptical about making her jealous. She simply ended things with me with the first bit of that.
Dirty Little Virgin: A Submissives’ Secrets Novel Page 206
