by Debra Dunbar
“I have no idea,” he replied with honesty. “I’ve got no idea, but I’ll find something.”
Chapter 1
Dustin set my duffle bag onto the dock then turned to give me a hand out of the plane. Good thing, too. Otherwise I would have ended up taking a dip in what I was sure was near-freezing water. It wasn’t just my unsteady legs on the rocking pontoons, it was my eyes looking everywhere except where my feet were going as I took in the breathtaking landscape of my new home—my last home. Because I either made it stick here with this pack, or I’d wind up six feet underground, with my head, no doubt, buried a few miles away from my body.
The pilot steadied me as I planted both feet on the dock, then bent to retrieve my bag.
“That’s the Alpha House?” I couldn’t keep the awe from my voice. We’d flown over what seemed like an entire town of buildings clustered within a quarter mile of the lake, and here at the edge of it all was a huge, sprawling, two-story log house with a wraparound porch and nearly as many windows as logs.
“Yep, that’s the Alpha House.” There was a note of pride in Dustin’s voice. “This is the pack compound. We all live here.”
Here? In the middle of nowhere? All together? The packs I’d been a member of in the lower forty-eight tended to operate on more of a human-society structure with shifters living wherever they chose, only meeting monthly for pack business at a local VFW or rented fire hall. I felt claustrophobic just thinking about a “compound”, but it’s not like I had any choice in the matter. They could stick me in a windowless basement room and it would be better than dead. Maybe.
“How far do you guys have to commute to work?” In Dallas, Richmond, L.A. and Philadelphia, work hadn’t been too far of a daily drive, where many of the Minneapolis pack had needed to drive an hour each way from home to their jobs. Once again I wondered what I’d do to support myself here in the wilderness.
Easy answer—whatever I could find. And whatever the new Alpha told me to do. No fighting. No disrespectful behavior. No disobedience. This was it. Shape up, or get off the bus. I gritted my teeth, determined to make this one work. Although I’d been determined to make all the other ones work, too.
“We’re all employed at one of the pack businesses, so it depends. Robin has the worst commute with two hours each way. Books on tape are her friends.”
Books on tape? Didn’t they have internet out here? And who the hell still had a tape player in their car? My worry over whether Dustin meant cassettes or eight-track vanished as I saw a four-wheeler heading our way. Eyeing my pilot’s stance, I quickly determined that this wasn’t my new Alpha approaching. I relaxed, still bowing my head slightly and staring at the dock planks six feet in front of me. This was a new pack and I didn’t know where in the hierarchy I stood. No sense in starting off my first five minutes with a fight for dominance, especially with my reputation. I’d sit happily at the bottom rung until I’d earned their acceptance and respect.
No you won’t, that voice inside me snarled. Bottom rung, my ass. You’re more powerful than this pilot, more powerful than this woman on the four-wheeler, probably more powerful than the Alpha himself. They bow before you, or you make them bow.
Or they kill me. There were over sixty wolves in this pack. That was more than enough to take me down, even if my beast went on a rampage. This was my last chance. Don’t fuck it up, I told the voice.
The four-wheeler came to a halt. I peered up enough to see a blonde who looked like she might double as a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition model in jeans and hiking boots. Her glossy golden locks were pulled up into a pony tail. She didn’t look particularly welcoming, but she didn’t look like she was ready to sprout fur and rip into my jugular either.
“Good luck,” Dustin muttered. I shot him a quick smile of thanks and walked over to the blonde, waiting until she addressed me before I spoke. The beast inside me bumped against the edges of my skin, desperately wanting to pin this bitch and possibly pee on her. The sensible part of me hoped that none of that aggression was apparent.
“Tupper Mills.”
It wasn’t a question, but I nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”
“Get on.”
I had no idea who this woman was, what her position in the pack was, and that bothered me far more than it did my beast. I wanted to fit in, and fitting in meant knowing my place and acting in the correct manner toward my new brothers and sisters. My beast didn’t give a shit. Keeping my gaze lowered, I shouldered my bag, climbed onto the back of the four-wheeler, hooking my feet around the pedals and bracing my hands on my thighs. As expected, the blonde stomped on the accelerator, taking off toward the Alpha House. It would have been improper for me to hold onto her waist, so instead I gripped with my thighs and tried my damnedest to keep from flying off the back of the moving vehicle. Thankfully it was a short ride. Without any further communication from my chauffeur, I hopped off the four-wheeler and followed her into the house and through several doors.
It was glaringly obvious when I was in the presence of my new Alpha, and not just from his position behind an enormous solid chunk of desk furniture. There were six people in the room besides the blonde and me, every one of them a werewolf, and every one of them looking like they could give me a run for my money in a fair fight. Not that I ever fought fair.
The guy behind the desk was different. Alphas always exerted some sort of pressure on me, as if they had their hands firmly planted on top of my head. This dude felt more like he had his claws embedded deep inside my chest. He made me nervous. And when my beast got nervous, she got hostile. I wasn’t an Alpha, but I couldn’t help but want to dominate every single shifter I met. It was a character flaw that would kill me before my ninetieth birthday if I couldn’t find a way to overcome it.
The Alpha ignored me. They all ignored me. The blonde stood patiently just inside the door, her hands clasped in front of her. I was two feet behind, with my hands clasped behind my back as if I were a prisoner waiting my turn on the gallows. Glancing up, he nodded at the blonde. She turned and left, knocking me with her shoulder as she passed. My beast snarled, but I was too thrown off kilter to act. Should I enter? Should I sit? No, I shouldn’t do anything until instructed. There was a reason this was my last chance. The Swift River Pack was known for the military way they ran their organization, and their Alpha, Jake Linton, was uncompromising. Others might rule their werewolf group with a kinder, gentler touch, but this guy didn’t mind bashing heads and cuffing ears. You did what he said, the exact way he said it, or you paid in blood. If my beast wouldn’t submit to him, it was over for me.
Half an hour I stood there like a statue, listening to the others discuss flooding, the season’s excursion schedule, something about dead bears, and a recipe for fish stew from a guy named Yeti. My beast grew bored and settled, their voices fading into a soothing monotone of sound. I was nearly asleep on my feet when the four who were standing around the desk filed by me and out the door.
A few more minutes passed before the Alpha finally looked up, catching me as I observed him and meeting my disrespectful, lifted gaze. I should have immediately dropped my head, but I couldn’t help but stare. He was obviously of African descent with his dark, coffee-brown skin and short, black, curly hair, but his eyes were an eerie light blue. They reminded me of the surreal shade I’d seen in the glacier ice on the trip up here. And the expression in them was just as cold and hard as those jagged chunks of ice.
Then the ice shattered. I felt something like electricity sizzle through me. His expression registered surprise, as if he’d felt it too. Warmth. Recognition. I didn’t know him. I’d never met him, but there was a familiarity about him that made my beast sit up and take notice. I was all the way across the room, but I felt myself touch him—not his skin, but him.
He jerked backward, and the contact broke, his expression once more icing over.
“Sit,” he commanded.
My ass was in a chair before the last consonant left his lips. I still
couldn’t look down, though. He had a sharp, angular face, the severity not at all relieved by his full lips. I had no idea how tall the guy was, but his shoulders were wide enough that I’ll bet he had to turn sideways to get through narrow doorways. And judging by the size of his arms, he took upper body day at the gym pretty seriously. The guy looked like he should have been a linebacker on a football team, if he’d been wearing anything but a suit, that is.
I wanted to touch him again, but I was afraid if I repeated that weird experience, he’d punch me across the room.
“Should I behead you now and save us all a lot of trouble?” my Alpha asked, his voice low and smooth as the silk of his jacket.
I grinned, trying to fake a composure I didn’t have. “I’d rather you give me a chance to screw up first.”
The corner of his mouth twitched. “And what makes you think this time is going to be any different than the last five—” he checked the paper in front of him, “—no, ten packs. Ten.”
“Eleventh time’s a charm, sir?”
Again with the infinitesimal twitch of his lip. “I doubt it, but I can’t just kill you outright. That would mean paperwork, and I’m a busy man. Although, I’m not averse to filling out a few hundred pages of forms if you piss me off, Mills. Understand?”
He stood and I jumped to my feet, knocking my chair backward and wincing at the sound of the crash of it against the floor. “Understood, sir.”
“Jamie!”
The door opened and the blonde stood there, ample chest heaving as she panted. “Sir?”
“Take Mills to her quarters.” He turned to me. “You’ll be staying in the bottom-bitch house until you earn your way into the higher-level dormitories.”
Or until he executed me. The bottom-bitch house. Dormitory-style living. I swallowed hard, thinking this was going to be the shortest pack membership of my life.
Chapter 2
Jamie handed me off to a young brunette named Mir and informed me the dorm super would be by later to give me my work assignments for the week. Then she left and Mir eyed me nervously.
“Which bed is mine?” I slid my bag off my shoulder and looked around. There were no bunk beds, just singles with a trunk at the foot of each one. Across from the row of beds was a line of metal lockers, each with a number. I was guessing I’d be taking one of the plain beds that wasn’t personalized with a colorful comforter and pillows, and I was right.
“That one there. Your locker is number fifteen. The higher level dorms have four to a room, some only two to a room. I like rooming with five others, though. I like having lots of people around me.”
Well, not me. I set my bag on the trunk at the end of the bed. Hopefully they had a blanket I could use. It might be August, but the weather here was colder than I was used to, and my other belongings were being shipped up. At least I thought they were. My former pack might have kept them thinking I’d be dead before the boxes arrived. Or they may have burned them.
I wasn’t sure what I’d be able to keep anyway. It didn’t look like there was much room here for personal belongings. And there was one other issue.
“There are no locks on the trunks or lockers?” My beast wasn’t too happy about that, and neither was I. I liked my privacy. And although I didn’t own anything worthy of theft, I didn’t want to be the subject of such practical jokes like a locker full of shaving cream or flaming dog crap.
“No. We’re shifters. It’s pretty easy to tell who has been messing with someone’s stuff. And there’s zero tolerance for theft.” Mir shuddered. “Rule one, don’t break the rules. Jake doesn’t give second chances and you don’t want to know how creative he gets with punishments.”
“What about kids? Are they also subject to these rules and draconian punishments?” That’s where these authoritarian types always fell apart. It was hard to hold a young wolf to adult standards.
“Depends on their age. Older ones are held accountable for their actions. Younger ones are considered their parents’ responsibility and it’s one of the parents that takes the punishment.”
I didn’t like it, but I didn’t have to like it. It’s not like I was ever going to have kids. Like, ever.
“We’re up at five for breakfast and pack drills, then you can go back to sleep or head in to work depending on your assignment and shift. There’s a wing for the third shift wolves so they can get undisturbed sleep. It’s got black-out blinds and everything. On the weekends we run hunts or hunt simulations.” Mir grinned, her dark eyes sparkling with excitement. “Last week we divided into four teams and had a paint-gun war. The week before we battled on the lake in inflatable rafts. The team with the most dry at the end won a fishing excursion this fall. This weekend it’s steal the steaks in wolf form.”
It was like corporate team-building on steroids. And the daily pack drills before breakfast? My wolf was none too happy about that.
“We’re a big pack, so we only hunt all together maybe twice a year, but we all get several chances to go out in small groups to hunt. And, of course, you can always request permission to do a solo or partner hunt, if you like.”
We’d only had annual hunts in my other packs, and I’d always been forbidden from joining in. Seriously injure a few pack mates one time and no one would ever let you forget it.
Mir sat on the bed next to mine and I began to unpack, taking out the small piles of underwear, shorts, pants, and T-shirts. I had a small bag of toiletries and a larger makeup bag that I put in the trunk next to my clothes.
“All of your food is provided, three meals a day,” she continued in a cheerful tone. “There are usually two to three choices, and if you’re picky, you can just eat cereal or beef jerky. There’s a kitchen in each dorm, and once you start earning money, you can always buy food and cook it yourself for a special meal. Most of us don’t, because why buy food when what’s in the cafeteria is free for all pack members? And it’s good. And that way you can eat with your friends and family and everyone else and not all alone in the dorm common area.”
I had no friends or family, and the thought of eating every meal in a cafeteria made my stomach knot up. It’s not like I had any money to be cooking my own food, though. So it would be cafeteria, or a pretty severe weight loss program.
“I’ll take you over to the compound shop this weekend and you can pick out any clothes you need,” she continued. “That’s all provided, too. You’ll get a wage from your assignment, and with that you can buy special clothing or treats.”
“You guys order things online?” I wasn’t sure what was permissible in terms of shopping here. Although I was hardly likely to be doing much shopping. I had very little money of my own, and hadn’t really ever been interested in knickknacks or fancy clothes.
“Sure. If you save up enough, you can buy anything you want. There are computers in the resource center that are for public use, and if you save enough, you can buy your own laptop.”
Okay, that wasn’t so different than the other packs. The main difference seemed to be that the tithe here was hefty, but that wouldn’t matter since it seemed the pack provided for every basic need.
“Are there are lot of mated pairs in the pack? I’m surprised to see such big dormitories.”
She nodded. “All the little houses out front are for mated pairs or people who have on-call kinds of jobs. There are larger ones for those who manage to have pups. Those are clustered together so the kids can play without having to run across the compound. The kids are all eager to move into the dormitories as soon as they’re old enough, though. It’s nice to be independent and not have parents breathing down your neck at every step.”
Which made me wonder… “How old are you, Mir?”
She flushed. “Sixteen. How old are you?”
Here we go. “Eighty-four.”
She gasped. “You look maybe twenty-three at most.”
And I’d most likely continue to look that age for a century or so. If I lived that long.
“You’ve bee
n in eight packs?” she asked, her eyes wide.
“Ten. I’ve been kicked out of ten packs, not including the ones where I was a temporary guest until some Alpha stepped forward to take me in.”
She shook her head. “Why didn’t you just go solitary if you can’t handle being in a pack?”
Because I needed to be in a pack. It terrified me to think what might happen if I were out on my own with no structure, no one to hold me accountable—at least no one to try to hold me accountable. But I wasn’t about to tell Mir that.
“Solitary in the lower forty-eight can be a death sentence, unless you never shift and want to live as a human. The angels still keep an eye on things there.” I looked around the dormitory. “Things are different in Alaska.” And things were very different here. Hopefully different would be a good thing for me.
“I’ll admit I was a little scared when I heard you were coming here.” Mir eyed the tattoos on my arms. “And I was really scared when they said I needed to show you around and get you used to the pack rules.”
She didn’t need to be scared. She was young and although she wasn’t what I’d term submissive, she wasn’t dominant. As far as my beast was concerned, she didn’t exist. And that was a good thing for both her and me.
“I won’t hurt you,” I told her, just in case she was still scared.
She shot me a mischievous smile. “Not intentionally, but if you get into trouble, I’ve got a feeling you’ll be dragging me into it as well.”
Probably. Poor kid. It wasn’t like I could help it, though.
Mir gave me the grand tour of the dorm, then we walked all over the compound as she showed me how to sign out a car if I needed to go out anywhere, the enormous supply of fishing supplies, kayaks, and climbing gear that I could use, and where the library, media rooms, and cafeteria were, where I was supposed to sign out a bottle of antidote for something or another if I had to leave the compound, and a dozen other places that I probably wouldn’t remember or ever be able to find again. It was like a university, an entire self-sufficient community by a lake and mountains. Not that I’d ever attended a university.
