by Tara Rose
“And how long was it before he hit you again?” asked Felipe quietly.
“Three months. His abuse was subtle and insidious. After he hit me that first time, the next time was after he asked if we could try something kinky in bed. I agreed, thrilled that he wanted to add some kink to our sex life. But he turned that night into an excuse to smack me, over and over, even though I begged him not to. He said I’d asked for it by letting him tie me up.”
“How was that?” asked Rey. “Your sex life, I mean. Before he asked to try the kink.”
“Boring.” There was no point in lying to them. “Routine. We’d go weeks without anything. Not even a cuddle or kissing. He had a world of excuses for his behavior, and I always bought them because I felt trapped. His family was over all the time, and they were hypercritical of everything I said or did, how I walked, how I dressed, even how I made coffee.”
She shifted her position on the table. “And then came that day he tied me up. I had no idea he even had such fantasies, but it wasn’t fun and games like my fantasies had always been. He had a knife that I didn’t see until he brandished it, and then he cut off my clothes. Literally. I was afraid, but he kept telling me to relax. When I asked him to untie me he said he would when he was finished and not before.”
“I hope you know that’s not how it’s supposed to be,” said Felipe. “That’s not what we do as Doms.”
“I know that.”
“What we do is consensual,” said Rey. “All of it. What he did to you was not true BDSM.”
She nodded. “I understand that now, but thank you for saying so.” Mattie squeezed her hands tightly together for strength. “Sex that night was rough and raw. He’d never been that way, and I just kept wishing he’d stop. Finally he did, but then he kept wanting to do new things. If I refused, he slapped me and yelled at me, calling me the most horrible names I’ve ever heard. He said I was frigid and cold, and that he wished he’d known what an ice queen I was before he’d married me.”
“Did you point out that he was the one who usually refused you?”
She averted her gaze. “I was afraid to. That was also the exact moment where I realized I was in big trouble, but I didn’t know what to do. I was in debt to him, literally. I’d signed a prenup, like an idiot. His family was obnoxious, but they didn’t seem to know what he was like behind closed doors. Or if they did, they avoided acknowledging it. They hid it behind charity events and board meetings. I had no one to talk to. Even when my Uncle Maynard died, I didn’t come home for the funeral. And I certainly couldn’t talk to my parents about my fucked-up marriage.”
Felipe reached for her, stroking her arm, and she drew strength from his warm touch. “I’m so sorry. I wish we’d known what was going on. You could have talked to us.”
“I know. I’ve always considered you both friends.” And I’ve always wished you were more than that.
“And we’ve done the same toward you,” said Rey. “Do you want to keep going?”
She nodded. “Yes. I need to get all of this out or I never will.”
He stroked her other arm. “We’re right here, then. Just let it out.”
Why hadn’t she left Clay before the surveillance had started? She should have come home. Doc Ramon would have hired her. And these two would have been waiting, just as they were now. Mattie was desperate to believe in someone again, and they were here with her. They weren’t judging or clucking their tongues in disbelief. She could get through this.
Chapter Six
Mattie took another deep breath. “Shortly after that horrible night, I became aware that he or someone in his family was having me followed. The same dark-blue sedan was suddenly everywhere, but the driver changed. Sometimes it was a woman and other times it was a man. I asked a friend of a friend to run the plate and found out it was registered to his cousin, Anell.”
“Who was the man?” asked Rey.
“Probably her brother, Alvin. I’d only met them a few times at family gatherings. People used to say how much Alvin looked like Clay and his brother, Cletus, but that’s where the similarities ended. Alvin and Anell are the outcasts of the family. She was arrested a few times for shoplifting, and he was into breaking and entering.”
“Nice pair,” said Rey.
“Did you confront him about being followed?” asked Felipe.
“Yeah. Big mistake. He went ballistic with the name calling again, and this time he pushed me up against the nearest wall and dry-humped me, squeezing my breasts until I cried. He carried me upstairs and dumped me on our bed, then took a pair of scissors from the bathroom and cut off my clothes. I had to lie still because when I tried to move away from him he ended up cutting me, and he didn’t care that he had. If I’d tried to get away I would have ended up in the ER or worse.”
“Mattie…” Rey brushed a finger along her face, and she had to fight back tears at the tenderness of the gesture. “You don’t have to tell us any more if you don’t want to.”
“I have to. You should hear all of it.”
He nodded.
“From there, things went downhill quickly. I was afraid to be home, but I had no place to go. If I didn’t come home from work when he expected me to, he’d grill me for hours about where I was and who I was with. I was afraid to go to sleep, but he wouldn’t let me sleep in another room, even though we had a whole house full of them. I tried that once and he dragged me back to our bedroom by my hair. My head hurt for two weeks.”
She wiped at the tears falling down her cheeks. “Once, when we had an emergency at the clinic and I had to leave in the middle of the night, I left him a note instead of waking him up to let him know where I’d gone and why. When I got home…” She took a few shaky breaths.
“When I got home, it was a Saturday afternoon and I was exhausted. But he was waiting with something brown in a bowl. He smeared it all over the kitchen floor and made me crawl in it, naked, and then he told me to clean it up. He said if I ever left the house like that again without telling him why, or where I was going, next time he’d make me eat it.”
“Oh my God…” Felipe reached across the space between them and pulled her into an embrace. She clung to him, her body reacting to his warmth, while her mind reeled with images of that horrible day. When he released her, he brushed the tears from her face. “Are you sure you want to keep going?”
“Yes. I’m almost to the day I finally filed for divorce. He’d saved his feces. That’s what I crawled through and then cleaned up.”
“Yeah,” said Felipe. “We figured that.”
“That was on a Saturday. On Monday morning, instead of going to work I drove to Birmingham, over an hour away, and spoke with an attorney who wasn’t connected to Clay’s family or to my mother’s family in Mobile. He wasn’t easy to find. Clay’s family has the state locked down tightly, and I knew if I tried to drive too far I’d be gone too long. I had to make sure I could get back home by the time I usually got home from work, and I had to make sure I wasn’t followed.”
“How long did it take to file?” asked Rey.
“Longer than I had hoped it would. The attorney was trying his damndest to find dirt on Clay, but finally I told him I didn’t want to do that. I only wanted out. I had so little money of my own as it was because he kept my finances on a very tight leash, and his accountant went over everything I spent. I had to turn in receipts for anything other than take-out food or gas money, so I took my lunch to work, ate as cheaply as possible when I did eat out, and bought clothes that I later returned without them finding out about it because I asked for cash back instead of a credit card refund. I quickly learned which shops would do that and which would not.”
Rey shook his head. “What a horrible way to have to live.”
“I was in survival mode. I finally had to borrow money from a coworker so the attorney would file the papers. I told her it was for a present for Clay, and I didn’t want him seeing the credit card bill and guessing what I’d bought him.”
> “Did anyone at work know what was going on?”
“If they did, they never said anything. The night before I left for good, he cut up a lot of my clothes because I’d accidentally burned dinner. He said if I couldn’t be trusted to cook, I didn’t deserve designer clothing. I didn’t give a shit about the clothes, but I took what I had left with me because in my mind they meant cash.”
“We heard rumors about spray paint as well,” said Felipe.
“Oh, yeah. How could I forget that? I went out with some coworkers one night to celebrate one of their birthdays. He’d given me permission to go, but when I got back, he was pissed off that I was obviously a bit drunk. And when he found out there had been female and male coworkers at the party, he cut off my dress and spray-painted words like ‘slut’ and ‘whore’ all over me. Then he washed off the paint with a hard-bristled brush. I was bleeding all over the shower but he didn’t care.”
Rey pulled her close this time, and Mattie held onto him until he released the embrace. What would her life have been like if she’d come home after college? She’d never know. And there were no time machines. It wasn’t possible to go back, but she could move forward from here.
“When I finally had the money to file, I packed two large suitcases as soon as Clay left for work, and I just drove. By that time, his cousins had stopped following me, or at least I thought they had. I called my boss from Georgia and told her everything. She cried on the phone with me and asked how she could help. I told her to take my last paycheck and anything else I was owed and give the money instead to my coworker from whom I’d borrowed the money.”
“That was so kind of you,” said Felipe.
“I never had any intention of not paying her back. Once I found a job in Georgia, I sent her the rest of it. I stayed there until the divorce was final, looking over my shoulder constantly. The car was mine. I’d had it since my undergrad years, but I sold it before I came back here.”
“He never came after you?”
She shook her head. “I filed a police report and called in some favors to get an order of protection. Several times I thought I spotted him or one of his family members, and each time I got the license plate and called the cops. Athens is a tight-knit community. They take care of their own. I felt safe there, but I didn’t go anywhere else. I merely waited for it to be over.”
“It took a long time for the divorce to become finalized, didn’t it?” asked Rey.
“Yes. His family saw to that. They tried every trick there was and I used up every cent I had left paying attorney fees. By the end, he wasn’t even charging me for half the stuff he should have been. I think he felt sorry for me. When I got the settlement, I wanted him to take out the money I knew I owed him, but he refused. He said it was one of the most horrible cases of hidden abuse he’d ever seen and he only wished he could have helped me sooner.”
“And then you came home, right?”
“Yes. I’d heard about Doc Ramon retiring, and we worked out a deal before the divorce was final.”
“Do you think Clay will follow you here?” asked Felipe.
“He has no reason to. I have nothing that belongs to him. I even left my wedding rings behind when I left the house in Madison. I’ve taken back my maiden name, and he has no reason to pursue me. He even had his attorney deduct the amount of my student loans from the settlement. That wording is actually in my papers.”
“What an asshole,” said Felipe.
“Let him try and follow you here,” said Rey. “He’ll find out just how powerful our families actually are.”
She smiled. “With the Durantes and Raleighs behind me, I have nothing to fear on this island.”
“And you’re safe with us. I hope you know that.”
She stared into his blue eyes, mesmerized by the emotion in them. These two still had no idea how much she’d fantasized about a life with them, but this wasn’t the time to drop that bomb. She was drained after telling them all the details of her marriage, but at the same time she felt freer than she had in a very long time. “I know. And now you both know the awful truth about my life.”
“It doesn’t change anything,” said Felipe. “Other than we now have even more reason to want to protect you.”
“Plus, now you have our lizards,” said Rey. “Looks like you’re stuck with us.”
“Should we check on them?”
“I don’t know. They might still be basking in the afterglow.”
She couldn’t help laughing this time as she imaged the agamas, kicking back and smoking cigarettes in their aquarium. The three found them at opposite ends of the cage, but now Bruce’s head was bright red.
Rey pumped his fist in the air. “All right, Bruce! Score!”
Mattie laughed so hard that tears ran down her face. “Come on. I think we’re scaring them.”
They walked past her bedroom and Felipe peeked inside. “At least you’re close to them. Promise you’ll check in on them later tonight?”
“I promise.” They stared into each other’s eyes for long moments, and Mattie wished the guys didn’t have to leave. She hugged herself as a shiver coursed down her spine. “I guess I’m a bit freaked out now after getting all that out. I’ll probably look in on them a lot because I don’t think I’ll sleep well now.”
“Do you want us to stay?” asked Felipe. “I don’t mean in your bed. I mean here, at your place.”
She shook her head. “I don’t have a big house like you both do. You’d have your choice of a very uncomfortable day bed next to Bruce and Babs, or the equally uncomfortable sofa downstairs. But thank you.”
“All right,” said Rey. “Then let’s all go back downstairs and watch a movie or something. When you think you can sleep, then we’ll leave.”
“You really wouldn’t mind?”
Rey surprised her by pulling her close again. His body was so warm, and Mattie wished they were both her lovers, and that she’d never gone through her marriage. This was so messed up. She couldn’t even allow normal emotions to take over at a time like this. Her lust for them was all mixed up with the bad memories. How on earth was she supposed to overcome something like this? How was that even possible?
* * * *
Every centimeter of Rey’s skin was on fire. It was all he could do not to kiss Mattie, but he knew that would be the absolute wrong thing to do right now. He was torn between wanting to beg her to let them both into her heart, and defying the damn curse to fly to Alabama tonight if he could persuade someone at McMurphy Flight to take him. He’d find Clayton Hale III and show him how the men on Sybaris Cove dealt with abusers.
“We wouldn’t mind.” He brushed a lock of hair off her face. “Besides, you think we’re leaving you alone with Bruce and Babs this soon? Can’t you tell we’re both going through withdrawal?”
She laughed softly, and Rey thought it was the sweetest sound in the whole world. “I knew it. I knew you two couldn’t do this.”
“We’re weak,” said Felipe. “You found us out. Now you’re stuck with us for good.”
“Oh, whatever shall I do?” She put the back of her hand over her forehead and closed her eyes in a dramatic gesture, and Rey had to release the embrace. His damn dick was rock hard and there was no way she’d miss that, even through his jeans.
“Never fear, my lady,” said Felipe. “We have a plan.”
“My heroes. I’m saved.” She started to lean back in a fake swoon, and would have actually fallen if Rey hadn’t caught her.
“Well, so much for heroism,” said Felipe.
Mattie was laughing so hard that it sounded like she could hardly catch her breath.
“Let’s go watch TV before we drop you down the stairs or something,” said Rey. “I think we both need some work on the saving damsels in distress stuff.”
She faced them both, smiling. “No, you don’t. I’m being serious now. You have no idea what this evening has meant to me. Thank you, for everything. For being there still, like you always were.
Thank you for dinner and for listening tonight. And thank you most of all for not assuming anything about tonight. For simply being here with me.”
A thousand emotions raced through his mind at once, and Rey could hardly breathe. He took her hand and squeezed it, ignoring the red-hot lust that made his dick throb. “It’s our pleasure, Mattie. Truly. We aren’t going to leave you alone in this.”
Felipe put an arm around her shoulder. “He’s right. You have our friendship and our ears, for as long as you need both.” Felipe kissed her on the cheek, and Rey watched her face carefully for any sign it was too much, but her smile never faded.
Rey held onto her hand as they walked downstairs, wishing like hell she had come back to the island after graduating from veterinary school. But he couldn’t change anything she’d been through. He could only continue to be her friend and support her, and hope like hell there was some way to convince her that not all men would hurt her.
Chapter Seven
As they chose a movie on one of the satellite channels to watch, Felipe tried to make sense of everything Mattie had just told them. A few of the incidents they’d never heard before, but most of it had been circulated around the local papers where Clay’s family lived, so he and Rey had read them, along with others on the island. Any time a Sybaris Cove local made the gossip columns, people seemed to zero in on it with no effort at all, thanks to the miracle of the Internet.
So while Mattie thought she’d told this story to them the first time, he hoped she didn’t know how many of her current neighbors probably already knew most of it. He was simply grateful she still trusted him and Rey enough to tell them now. And, as much as he only wanted to hold her and kiss her right now, this was enough. Sitting here with her, watching an obscure but recent movie and eating popcorn.
She’d even made them sweet tea, which to Felipe tasted like she’d poured an entire five pound bag of sugar into it, but he imagined she’d learned that habit from living in Georgia and Alabama for years. Thankfully, the sweet tea craze had never reached the same popular status on this island. But he drank it anyway because she’d gone to the trouble of making it for them.
