by Oakes, Tara
“So, do you girls come visit Charlie often, in her new hometown of Oakton?” Clink asks my family. I’m sure he wants to hear their answer, but the real purpose of the question was for me to hear it. Oh God, please just let this be over already.
Almost every embarrassing base has been covered by the time we’ve finished lunch. Let’s see… terrible stories of when I was determined to try out for the boys football team…check. Dying my hair black in middle school and wanting to change my name to Raven…check. Failing my driver’s exam three times…check.
I’ve tuned the voices out as the three of them continue to bond. Dana is the president of the Brian Abbott fan club. Mom’s deciding whether or not she’ll be an honorary member. He has them eating out of his hand.
I lift my glass to take another deep sip of my wine when Clink, or Brian, I should say, mindlessly intercepts it and takes it from me. He slides the glass far away from us without breaking his conversation with my mother. She eyes his movements and smiles, gloating that someone has some sort of handle on me, since she obviously doesn’t.
I roll my eyes. Fine. I reach for the wine bottle and tilt it to take a swig. Dana laughs loudly at my barbaric act. Mom ignores me, although I know it’s pissing her off.
“Excuse me, Regina,” he politely interrupts my mother and her telling of how I failed eighth grade gym class by refusing to join swim class.
He angles himself toward me, cocking his head to the side. I finish my sip and release my suction from the bottle with an echoey thump. He cocks his eyebrow and waits. I squint, burning him with my eyes for joining their “team.” I aim to raise the wine bottle once more when he clears his throat heartily.
Ugh. I hand him the pinot noir, although I concede nothing. He takes it, and flags down a passing waiter. “We’re quite done with this.”
Dana laughs again.
Clink hands his credit card to the waitress during her next stop, instructing her to take care of the bill. Mom’s just been bought, hook, line, and sinker. She’s a stickler for manners and chivalry. I have to laugh, though. I wonder if she’d think he was being chivalrous to let me come first in bed, all the time?
“Thank you so much, Brian. It was such a lovely, unexpected surprise to meet you today. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to visit the powder room before the ride home.” Mom is incapable of using any other term other than “powder room.” How very 1970’s of her.
Clink helps me to my wobbly feet before putting his jacket on.
“Brian, will we get to see you again?” Dana asks her new BFF.
He turns to me and smiles. “Sure. I know it’s a little bit of a ride, but you have an open invitation to Chisolm anytime you want.”
Dana freezes. “Wait. I’m sorry. Did you just say Chisolm?”
Fuck.
******
CLINK
Ah shit.
I knew I was gonna throw Sugar off by showing up, but I had no idea I’d be walking into a full-blown, bonafide, shit storm. To say there’s some family dysfunction would be putting it mildly. I knew Charlie wasn’t very forthcoming about her past, but turns out…she’s straight-up shady about it.
“Dana…whatever this shit is between us lately, I’m begging you…don’t tell mom about Chisolm,” she implores her baby sister.
The younger version of Sugar, bitchy mouth and all, looks pissed.
“How could you?” she whispers.
“Not now,” Charlie spits. “Just promise me.”
Dana rolls her eyes, gritting her teeth while searching for her mother in the distance.
“You owe me,” she reveals before turning to me. “So, Brian…you wouldn’t happen to ride a motorcycle, would you?”
Well, shit just got real interesting.
******
“Get in.”
Sugar eyes me, and I’m sure she’s trying to read me. She studies her keys hanging loose in her hand.
“Don’t even think it. You had way to much to drink to get behind a wheel.”
I head back to where she’s lagging behind, following me as we walk through the parking lot.
“Give them to me.”
She drops them gingerly into my palm. I nod as she finishes the action, grateful she’s not gonna be stupid and fight me on this. She may not be sloppy drunk right now, but she’s definitely blitzed. We finish the trip to my truck, and I open the passenger door for her to climb in. My temper gets the best of me and I slam it behind her…a little harder than I planned to.
I close my eyes and try to control it. I break out my phone and punch the numbers as I climb in. Sugar’s pin-still on the passenger side, but I can’t bring myself to look at her right now. The phone answers pretty quick.
“Hey, you working on anything tonight?” I ask T.J. through the receiver.
I can sense the hesitation in his voice. He may not be a prospect anymore, but he’s still much lower than me on the club totem pole. If I’m asking him if he has plans, he knows there’s a hidden agenda.
“Uh…not really. What’s up?” I can tell he’s sorry he asked.
I pause our conversation while I’m backing out of the parking space. I don’t drive the truck often, and it takes a moment to readjust to the differences between a bike.
“I’m leaving Sugar’s car behind in Oakton, at a place called Tempura. Take a prospect up here and drive it back.” There’s very little room in that request for him to say no.
I can hear him exhale. “Fine. Leave the keys under the mat. We’ll get around to it.”
“Thanks, bro.”
I end the call and throw the phone into the center console.
The sudden action causes Sugar to jump in her seat. I’m calming down, but still worked up. I catch her from the corner of my eye.
“Talk. Now.”
I want some fuckin’answers.
She closes her eyes, biting her lip, clearly not happy about the topic of discussion. She takes a very deep breath, preparing herself.
“My mom thinks I live in Oakton, OK? I was offered a job here and she thought it was a better opportunity.” She shifts uncomfortably in her seat. “It was just easier to let her think I took that job, than to argue with her about why I didn’t.”
I huff loudly. What is she, sixteen? Come on, is she that afraid to disappoint mommy? I’m sorry, but my Sugar would never be afraid to stand up for herself. She nearly bit some dick’s ear off and she’s afraid of her own mother?
“My old college roommate lives here, so I just use her address for mail and stuff. Mom’s checked out the apartment.”
I rub my temple, “And you really think she’ll never find out? How is that even remotely possible?”
Sugar shakes her head, “I don’t know. Things have just been so…bad between us since my dad died. I just needed to get away from them. I guess I really didn’t think things through.” Her voice trails off to a whisper by the time she’s done.
I’ve never seen her like this. She’s strong…bad ass, even. But not now. Now, she’s just a woman trying to hold herself together. She lifts her pinky to wipe away a tear from the corner of her eye before it releases itself, showing her vulnerability.
I look over at her, but she tries to hide her face, to hide her moment of weakness. I pull the truck over, out of traffic, and into a shopping center parking lot. By the time I throw the gear into park, her tears are flowing freely. I undo my seatbelt, allowing myself the freedom to position myself close to her.
I reach for her chin but she moves it away. Her throat makes strained sounds as she swallows her sobs.
“Baby,” I soften my voice. “Look at me.”
She doesn’t move to look, but doesn’t fight my hand on her chin this time. Her eyes are glassy, swollen. Her lips quiver as she struggles to contain her weeping.
“Charlie. I’m your man. You can’t hide this stuff from me. I take it all…the good and the bad.”
She shakes her head slightly, as if she doesn’t believe me.
She swallows hard. I can tell she’s not used to letting someone in like this.
“Calm down, Sugar. It’s gonna be fine. We’ll work this shit out with your mom. Even your sister. Whatever the beef is, you can’t let it fester.”
I wipe away the last of her falling tears. “Better?”
She rolls her eyes, embarrassed at how I’ve just seen her, “I just don’t want to talk about it anymore right now. Please.”
I exhale and nod, “Later. We’ll figure this out later, OK?”
She agrees. “Later.”
Her lips are double their size from her biting on them and pursing them tight while withholding her cries. I stare at them, plump and reddened, glistening from her tears. I move in, touching my lips to hers. Her body is tense, it takes her some time for her lips to loosen, but they do. She’s recovering from her ordeal, coming back to me.
Part of me wants to bury myself deep inside her, claiming her, proving to her that even with her baggage, she’s still mine. The other part of me wants to throw her over my knee and smack her ass until it’s pink, punishing her for trying to hide her double life from me.
I’m not the only one turned on, all hot and bothered. Sugar deepens our kiss pushing her body into me, fumbling with her own seatbelt to release her constraints.
“I need you,” she’s breathless. I know it’s her heightened emotional state talking, looking for some sort of outlet.
I groan. God… this woman is like nothing else. My Escalade is large but even as she’s petite, this isn’t going to be easy. She steals her lips back from mine, darting her eyes around trying to figure this out. She’s almost in a frenzy, looking for some way to get what she needs.
I quickly work to unbutton my pants, reaching in to withdraw my hardening dick. She watches me and instinctively knows what to do. She moves to straddle me. As she moves, I slip my hand under her black dress and push her underwear out of the way as she lowers herself onto me.
The friction is harsh as she’s not quite ready for me to enter, but Lord knows I can’t give this up right now. I work in other ways to get her body ready. I tickle her lips with my tongue, dragging out my kiss.
“You belong on my dick, Sugar,” I talk dirty to her. “It’s like it was made for you.”
The liquid streams now, easing my way, and she moans as I slide all the way in. Once I’m fully sheathed, she holds herself still, feeling every bit of me.
“I don’t deserve you, Clink,” she speaks softly. “But I can’t live without you, either.”
Pretty sure I’ve said those same words to her at some point. We’ve both done shit, had a past. But now that it’s all out there, we can move past it. This woman is worth that. Now that we’ve both come to terms with not being able to live without the other, we can stop wasting time on bullshit nonsense.
When I’m in my girl like this, nothing else matters. I lean her back against the steering wheel so I can see her, watch her. She’s goddamned beautiful. She’s perfect. Past or not, she’s mine.
CHAPTER NINE
CHARLIE
The phone ringing stirs Clink from his sleep. Not me, though. My twelve hour shift was one of my busiest, so between that and the lingering unease from our lunch with mom and Dana the other day, I haven’t been sleeping much at all.
Clink must be deep in R.E.M., because he’s slow to rise. I reach over him to grab the ringing device before the call is rerouted to voicemail. He lazily shifts his torso to accommodate my movements, but makes no effort to fully wake. The screen reads 2:48 in the morning as I swipe to accept the call.
“He- Hello?” my voice is strained. Yet another side effect from my sleepless nights.
There is a pause on the far end.
“Um…,” the voice belongs to a woman. A very confused woman. “I’m not sure if this is still the right number. Is this Clink’s phone?”
Oh great. Some long lost sweet-butt looking for a late night booty-call is hitting him up. Fan-fucking-tastic. I drop the phone onto his bare chest, with a hollow thud. That does the trick in waking him completely.
“It’s for you,” I inform him as nonchalantly bitchy as I can before leaving his bed to use the ladies room.
I hear the covers rustling as he searches in the dark for the phone. I also purposely leave the bathroom door ajar so I can hear his words. I reach for a small paper cup from the dispenser and pour myself some cool water from the tap while I wait.
His voice echoes through the dark empty room and reaches me, “Yeah?”
I sip my water as my anger builds. Who the fuck does this chick think she is? He’s my ol’man now. What would Sunny do if some random bitch called Tiny in the middle of the night? Or Lil’s? What would she do? Ha. I know what she would do, and it wouldn’t be pretty. I need to step in and let him know that this is in no way acceptable, and if he thinks it is, then he’s gonna feel my foot so far up his a-.
“Yeah. I’m on my way. I’ll drive through the night, be there by morning. Just…,” he sounds hurried. “Just tell him his dad’s on his way.”
Fuck. This is not at all what I thought it was. I drop my cup in the trash and enter the bedroom, with its light now turned on. The phone’s been tossed into the bed, abandoned. Clink is frenzied, hiking his jeans on and rummaging through his drawers for a shirt.
I eye him, but slow my movements. “Baby? Is everything OK?”
Stupid question. Everything is obviously not OK.
He’s throwing shirts out of the depths of the drawer mindlessly, eyes darting around wildly.“I’ve gotta go get my boy. His momma’s got some shit going on and just left him with her parents.”
My mouth drops open. I move to help him, scooting his disoriented body aside so I can select a shirt before he’s emptied the whole drawer on the floor. He stands back, lost, not knowing which way to move.
I find a long-sleeve thermal and hand it to him.
“I’ll go start some coffee.”
I leave him to finish dressing and throw the lights on as I travel through the house, making my way to the kitchen. I make a large pot of coffee and search the cabinets for one of the metal thermoses I’d seen days before while organizing the cupboards. Once it’s found, I start to pack a travel cooler with some sandwiches and water bottles. I’m not quite finished when Clink rushes in, dropping his boots in a heavy thud to the floor as he sits at the kitchen table to deal with them.
He looks haggard, but adrenaline and worry are fueling him.
“I’ll drive straight through. Get him and turn right back around. We can make it by late tomorrow night, I think.”
I nod. “I can go with you if you need me to help with the driving. We could take turns sleeping.”
He closes his eyes, exhaling. “I need you here, Sugar.” He now looks around us, at the house. “He…he hasn’t been here in years. I…I don’t even think he remembers me.” He’s starting to get upset, but hides it well. “This place isn’t set up for a kid. I….”
“I’ve got it, Clink. Don’t worry about a thing. I’ll take care of his room, get things ready for him. You just…be safe and go get him.”
He pulls me into him, hugging me around my waist as he’s seated. His words are muffled into my flesh.
“I don’t know if I can do this, Charlie. He’s… I…,” my heart breaks for him.
I know he loves his son, but loving from afar and actually being a parent are two very different things. I run my fingers through his hair, comforting him.
“You can do this, babe. You’re going to be fine. I know you, and I know that you never do anything half-assed. You got this.” I don’t know if my words are sinking in, but I do know that he has little choice but to believe them.
He nods his head into my midsection, moving the fabric with it, before squeezing tight, hands grabbing my ass, and lifting himself.
“We got this,” he whispers before reaching his full height and kissing his lips
to mine. I hold him, silently wishing him luck and offering him my strength.
I breathe deep, thinking of all that we are about to come up against.
“We got this,” I repeat his words.
******
“This one, Lil’s?” I ask my friend as she’s inspecting another product on a nearby shelf.
She breaks her concentration from the package she’s reading to look at mine. “Yup. That’s the one.”
Thank God! I toss the bundle of children's sheets into the cart. Who knew something as simple as sheets would be so so complicated?
“Thanks so much for helping with all this.” I sweep my eyes over the filling cart to emphasize what all this is. “Are you sure I’m not keeping you from your dad?”
Lil’s decides against the toy in her hand and places it back on its shelf.
“Nah, I needed a break. Tiny’s taking the next few hours so I can get some fresh air before losing my mind.”
I nod. I’ve been following Butch’s case while at work. He’s been having trouble breathing and now has full-blown pneumonia. I know they discharged him for a day, but he wound up right back in the ER the next morning, drunk and having not taken his meds.
I roll my eyes at his stupidity, careful to hide it from his daughter. “Well, I’m glad I could give you a break. And at this point,” I rub her belly sarcastically, “I can’t think of anyone better to help with this stuff. So, what else do we need?”
I take a mental inventory of our cart. Bedding, check. Clothes, check. Toys, check. Shampoo, children’s toothpaste, PJ’s, a car booster seat just in case he’s on the smaller side.…I can’t imagine we’ve forgotten anything.
“Hmm…” she seems to be taking the same silent tally. “Medicine! You need a first aid kit.”
My eyes widen, surprised. “Holy crap! How could I have forgotten that?” I admonish myself. “I mean I’m a nurse. A first aid kit should have been the first thing on my list. I don’t think I’m cut out for this, Lil’s. I’m not responsible enough for a fuckin’ cat! How am I supposed to help take care of a kid?”
