"So the stalker is not really a stalker, huh?" She said with a half-forced smile, clearly trying to relieve the tension.
“Grandma, why didn’t you tell me?“
She smiled weakly and took a deep breath as if preparing herself.
"It's a long story, you better sit down."
CHAPTER TWO
We went into the living room and sat on the couch, me with my coffee on my lips and Grandma with her story.
"I met Aarion when I was 23 years old. I bumped into him on the street and from the first moment, I knew he was special. He soon asked me out. At first, he didn’t tell me anything, but after a while I began to suspect some things. I didn’t know where his house was, which bothered me, he disappeared for days. Then one day I gave an ultimatum: he had to tell me what was happening. After thinking hard and considering what that meant, he gave in and told me everything. At first, I didn’t understand, — or I believed, in fact — but even knowing him for a short time, Aarion was already a big part of my life and in the end, I ended up believing.
"He stayed here for a few days in a row, but he always had to come back. His people left the portal open, but no one could stay here for long. They didn’t want them to bond with any human. Our land was like a vacation spot for them. They found our way of living without magic and all the gadgets fascinating"
"When he first met me, he had recently lost his mother. He spent so much time here trying to forget all the pain that awaited him there. He told me that only I could make him forget that constant pain, and that if it were for him, he would stay here and start a family together. Until the day he actually decided to do it, not caring about the consequences. That very day he returned to Pacem. "
"A week went by and I thought the worst. You know, it wasn’t easy. From the moment he said he was coming back, my heart was in my mouth. The fear that he wouldn’t come back to me was greater than anything. And Aarion had left here saying that he would inform the Council that he wouldn’t return to Pacem, that he would stay here with me and I knew that the risk that they wouldn’t accept was huge. A few days later he came back with a different look on his face. A sadness. The Council had refused his request to live here, let alone with a human. He spent the week trying to convince them, but without success. One day he woke up determined that he wouldn’t accept that others give the final say when it came to his happiness and he ran away. "
"He left home without taking anything, only the courage to leave the realm. As soon as he arrived at the portal, a member of the Council was waiting for him there. He reported that going back to our land would be treason, and if he decided to move on, he could never go back. He'd be banned from Pacem. "
"Anxious to leave his people, but happy to start a new life, he came back to me. Only when he returned did he tell me that he was expected to take the place of his father, the man waiting for him at the portal, in the Council. I said I couldn’t let him leave his people, his world, and he just replied 'You are my world now.' "
"A month later we were married. He got a job, and we got this house. A year later I was pregnant with your father, Ethan, your grandfather had made a friend, Joe, and opened a diner with him — Grandma smiled. "We were very happy."
"And what happened to Grandpa?"
"When Ethan was eighteen, we received an unexpected visit. Emir, Aarion's father, knocked on our door. He said he was sorry for everything. That he wanted to meet our family, his grandson, and that he had made a mistake in ousting his son from Pacem. Your grandfather soon forgave him and was incredibly happy, of course. A week went by, and Emir had to return.”
"A few days later a messenger came to Aarion saying that his father was very sick, that he should return to Pacem to say goodbye. Aarion wanted to go, but he was undecided. I insisted that he leave. It was his father, after all. When he really decided to go, Aarion wanted to take Ethan to say goodbye to his grandfather and at least meet Pacem. I spent hours trying to persuade him otherwise, but in the end, I conceded. With great anguish, but I gave in. They left that very night. "
"I remember the feeling of terror I felt when after a week they didn’t come back as if it happened yesterday. Each day I was more certain that I wouldn’t see them again. I hardly left the house, always staring at the door, waiting. I blamed myself for having encouraged him to go, for having let him take my son, and for letting that man come into my house and manipulate us, since I was sure that the absence of my husband and son was somehow his fault."
"Three long years passed and slowly, every day, I let most of my hope die, but not all of it. I forced myself to hold a thread of hope for them. I wouldn’t let myself give up. When I returned home and opened the door, I held my breath for a second, hoping to see them as soon as I came in, standing, waiting for me. "
"It was a normal and boring day like all others when it actually happened. I was home and suddenly the door opened. I ran hoping to see my husband and son finally coming back, but the sight was different. Instead, I saw Ethan and a woman with a baby in her arms. It was the first time I saw you, you were not even two months old. You were so beautiful. Your chubby cheeks were pink, and the little hair you had was exactly like your mother's, fire-colored.
Grandma smiled at the memory.
“As soon as I laid my eyes on them, I saw their expressions of anguish and realized that something had happened. Aarion wouldn’t return. And now I had a new family. I told them to come in, we put you to sleep, and your parents began to tell me what had happened. "
"Ethan said that when they got there almost four years ago, the messenger captured them as soon as they passed through the portal. He took them to Emir, — who was in very good health, thank you very much — who informed them that they belonged in Pacem. He wouldn’t let them live on this earth for another day. They would live there, whether they wanted or not, since the portal was now closed for good."
"Aarion, who didn’t have much choice, stayed there and arranged a place for him and Ethan. They tried everything to reopen the portal and get back. They never succeeded. Ethan said they never gave up, always looking for a sorcerer or a witch who could reopen the portal.”
"A year later he met Alethea, a girl who lived near their village. He said your mother was the only thing that made him hold on for all that time. Almost two years later, news of a war with an Orcus army began to fly. Aarion had taken a seat on the council a year earlier when his father decided to leave and finally found out why they never could find someone to reopen the portal. "
"Only the Council Sorcerer could open portals to other realms. Your father and grandfather saw an opportunity to return home. Aarion, who was already infiltrating the Council, made it his mission to befriend the Sorcerer, one day finally persuading him to open the portal to this land and let them go. You were already born, and Ethan saw that it was the perfect time to go home. With a family."
"They set a day, late at night, to run away. Aarion, Ethan, Alethea and you, walked through the dead of night to the portal. Before the Sorcerer could open it, Aarion's father appeared with Chosen Ones to make sure they didn’t pass."
"The Chosen Ones immediately understood that it wasn’t their job, that if anyone wanted to return to this land, especially someone who wasn’t there by choice, they could, and then they left. As the Sorcerer opened the portal, Emir lost control and attacked them. Ethan and your mother, with you in her arms, got through. Aarion was left behind. Your father said that the last thing he saw was Aarion being knocked to the ground by Emir, — shouting for them to pass through the portal — and being stabbed in the chest."
Grandma had a tear running down her cheeks. I also felt my vision blur. I felt bad for asking her to tell the story, since it caused her so much pain. If before I was annoyed that I didn’t know the truth earlier, now I didn’t even remember.
"Grandma, I'm so sorry," I said, wiping the tears from her face.
"It's all right, darling. Do you want me to keep going?”
I nodded and sh
e continued.
"A few weeks later, Alethea said she’d found other Pacem residents in Heaven Valley. The Orcus War wasn’t going well for the Pacenians and the people were fleeing here. They said Pacem was being destroyed.
"You were living here since you came back. When Ethan found out about the others, he decided he wanted to help them, after all he knew what it was like to be trapped in a completely different world. Your father got a place downtown for them, a hotel that no one wanted anymore because it wasn’t worth reforming, and helped them settle in."
"We spent the next six months in peace. Ethan and Alethea lived here, but spent a lot of time with their people. I started to get to know Alethea and soon realized why your father had fallen in love with her; she was a sweet and intelligent young woman. Maybe the nicest person I've ever met. It didn’t take long for me to love her, too. I was teaching her to cook food from here, in which she wasn’t very good. We always had some meetings in the kitchen when it was class time. Ethan liked to watch. Always laughing at us when we burned something. We were happy again, finally. "
"Until one day your parents left you here with me, as they always did, and went downtown to visit the Pacenians. A few hours later I got the call. "
She closed her eyes and sighed before continuing. I already knew what was coming and felt my breath sharpen.
"There was an explosion in the old hotel and my son and daughter-in-law had been identified. A gas leak, they said. As soon as I hung up the phone I went to look at you. So serene, sleeping. Wasn’t even a year old, and had already lost so much. "
Grandma was crying again. I hadn’t realized I was too until I felt the warm tears coming down my face.
"Life is like that, darling," Grandma continued, sniffling and wiping her face. "When you're happy, she'll get you down again. And the bastard is also ironic. Your parents went through all of that and ended up dying from a gas leak.”
"Grandma, I'm so sorry." I fell into her lap, crying.
It was all hoarded inside me and it would have to get out eventually. The time was now. The tears overflowed furiously, and little by little the pain of the loss that now seemed extremely recent was softening. Grandma stroked my hair as I sobbed into her lap. We stayed that way for a long time, silent, until I sat down again, slowly regaining my composure.
"And why didn’t you tell me anything?" I asked, wiping away the rest of the tears on my face. "You didn’t have to keep this secret alone.”
"I thought I was protecting you from all this pain. I thought you would never need to know all this, all this suffering, that you would have a normal and happy life; until you told me about John. When you told me about him, I quickly realized what it was about. I've been preparing for this conversation ever since.”
“So you knew I could be a Chosen One? "
“Yes. Your maternal grandmother was one, and very powerful, Alethea told me. She had the power of persuasion. She could make a giant run away crying if she wanted to.”
"And you kept in touch with the Pacenians after all this?"
"I'm ashamed to say it, but no. I was badly hurt, so I just focused on you and forgot the rest.”
"Don’t feel ashamed, Grandma. You've lost so much. It’s more than understandable. I probably would have done the same.”
She smiled and wiped the rest of a tear down her cheeks.
"You're too good, my dear. You wouldn’t have done the same," she said, taking my hand. “Can you forgive me? Forgive me for not telling you the truth?"
"Of course, I forgive you, Grandma," I said, pulling her in a hug. “I get it. You didn’t want to be revisiting the subject and the pain. You just wanted to protect me.
Grandma nodded, hugging me even harder. Between moments of complete silence and stories about Grandpa and my parents, we spent hours sitting on the couch laughing and crying again. By the time we realized it, it was already dusk. After a hug, ending the conversation that took away any doubts I had about my past and — from the look on Grandma's face — took the weight of carrying these secrets all my life, I went up to my room and lay in bed.
My head hurt by how quickly the thoughts flew.
I never thought Grandma had suffered so much. Or my parents. When I thought about my family I never imagined that they’d been through so much. So much suffering, so much loss. I couldn’t imagine what it must’ve been like for my father. Being in a different realm against his will, away from his family, not knowing if he would ever return. The fact that he and Mom met and had each other gave me some comfort.
But one thing kept pounding inside my brain and I couldn’t stop thinking about it: What if I really were a Chosen One? What power am I going to have? What if I’m not one? And who is killing the Chosen Ones? Could I really be a target? Could John protect me? The questions just kept popping up. I thought so hard that I fell asleep. I was already incredibly tired from last night, and today was even more intense. But it was worth every tear. Knowing where my family and I came from was invigorating.
I woke up as if I had been pulled by force and looked at the clock that marked 22 p.m. I laid in bed, staring out the window at the forest. As I looked at the trees swaying, I realized that from now on my life won’t be the same. Can anyone know so much about themselves and not change? I doubt it. Being a Chosen One or not, I now have a bigger family. And if I am, I can’t just ignore the fact that I can help others with the gift I have received, can I? I can’t. If I really am one, I will be worthy.
Something moved in the darkness and I got up quickly to turn on the light. The switch wasn’t more than three paces from my bed and when I turned on the light I saw that a familiar face was sitting in the corner of the room, smiling graciously.
"Damn it, John!” I said, jumping with fright. “What are you doing? Trying to scare me to death?"
"I just came to check on you," he said, continuing to smile.
“And the door is an unknown object to you?" I said taking a deep breath and coming back to bed.
"How was the conversation with your grandmother?"
He sat back on the chair, his elbows on his legs, and stared at me with complete attention. He seemed to really worry about what might or might not have happened.
“It went fine. She told me everything. I had no idea she’d gone through so much. Grandma always seemed so happy in my childhood. Maybe it was just a mask hiding the pain.”
Suddenly I found myself analyzing every memory I had of my childhood. No. I couldn’t tell if the happiness she showed was just a pretense. But isn’t that how it is? We only see if we’re really paying attention. And I wasn’t.
"Or maybe she was really happy," John continued, turning my attention back to him. “For you. She lost a lot, yes, but she got you. And if you ask me, that's more than enough.”
I smiled.
“Thank you, John."
“For what? "
"For telling me the truth."
"Well, actually I wasn’t supposed to. I even took some scolding, but I don’t regret it. You deserved to know everything. Especially now with a hunter out there."
"Who scolded you?"
“The Council. I wasn’t supposed to make contact with you. It was to let you live your life, not knowing about us, since your grandmother chose that way."
"And why did you do it?"
He hesitated before speaking. He kept looking at me for a few seconds, but I was silent. John raised his eyebrow, as if choosing his words very carefully.
"I think you've always seemed lonely. Even when you were talking to a colleague or just serving a customer in the diner. You had this habit to look around when you were with someone. Like you were looking for something. Like you just wanted to get out of there. I thought knowing that you had us, a family, would make you feel less alone.”
For some reason, as he spoke, I felt my eyes fill with tears. People don’t usually see the loneliness of others. They only see what we want them to see; the facade. When they ask how you are, they don’t want to
know the truth, they don’t want to know how you feel, if today you wake up sadder than yesterday, they just want to hear that automatic response, that "I'm fine." But here he was, seeing me for real.
The tears began to stream down my face and I didn’t know why. John seemed reluctant to say anything and began to walk slowly towards me with his hand carefully extended towards me.
"Liz, I'm sorry I upset you. I shouldn’t have said anything.” He said, sounding distressed. "It's none of my business…"
I wiped away my tears quickly, feeling completely crazy for crying in front of him.
"No, don’t worry. It wasn’t you. I'm just emotional after today, that's all.”
John sat next to me on the bed and we stood there, not saying anything. Timidly, he put his hand on my arm and squeezed slowly. He took his hand quickly — as if the act were criminal — the moment I turned to look him in the eye.
It was bizarre that John knew so much about me when I only knew his name. But I don’t think he had much choice, since he had to protect me for so many months. The feeling I had when I looked at him was even more bizarre. I could see him and I couldn’t help feeling that I had known him for a long time. The strands of hair that always fell on his forehead, the way he smiled and the color of his eyes gave me a sense of familiarity and security. But I knew that feeling alone meant nothing.
I decided to do my best to get to know him for real. We sat on the bed in silence, me leaning against the headboard and him sitting on the edge. My tears had stopped falling.
"You don’t think it's weird that you know me for months, and I've only known you for a few weeks? Well, it doesn’t even count as ‘knowing’ since you just stared at me without saying anything." I said, trying to smile.
"I don’t know you that well," she said, looking at his hands. "That wasn’t my job.”
Something told me that he wasn’t telling the truth.
The Chosen Ones: Red Smoke Page 3
