Was I though? I didn’t feel that fight these days, that strength. But Chloe didn’t seem to care, her priorities in her lips on me. She travelled down, unstrapping my belt. Her hand ventured inside my jeans, cupping me over my boxers. Her other hand went for my chest again, my scar between my ribcage, but I grabbed her wrist.
She eyed me. “What’s up?”
Honestly, I didn’t know. I just knew I wasn’t really feeling this. It didn’t feel okay anymore. Reaching up, I squeezed her arm, rubbing. “Something just feels off.”
She placed her hand behind my neck, frowning. “What exactly?”
Turning my head, I shook it. “This. Don’t you just get… I don’t know, over all this sometimes? I mean, isn’t this lonely for you? Just this? I roll through town and… you know this?”
She knew exactly what I meant. This, us, and this friendship. We always found our way here for some reason and I didn’t understand why.
She pressed her other hand to my neck. “No,” she said, answering my previous question. “Why would I be over this, us?”
I let out a breath, tapping a finger against her leg. “Because it isn’t enough. It’s so physical, vacant. Why is that enough for you?”
The words just came. They came and I had no idea why. Thinking about them, I wanted to take them back, apologize or something for saying them. It sounded rude I guess, as well as cold.
Chloe left my lap like I probably would have in her situation. She rubbed her hands down her face, and when she leaned back, she faced me. “You mean, why isn’t this enough for you, right? That’s what you’re really asking.”
Maybe, in a way, I was. I pushed my hand into my hair, my other on my stomach. The two of us sat in silence for bit, but what she said next had me turning my head.
“This is about her, isn’t it? That girl you came to the bar with last week?”
I didn’t say anything and she gave a dry laugh, shaking her head with it. Alex, my time with her, hadn’t come into my head when I asked Chloe what I had. But the moment she brought Alex up, I couldn’t find it in me to deny what she said.
Had it already been nearly a week since I’d last seen her? Since I last touched her…
I had a feeling the reality of that moved over my face. Chloe’s eyes lifted, her body shifting while she rested a hand on her leg. “She’s not good enough for you, Brody.”
She didn’t have a place to say what was right for me and what wasn’t. She didn’t even know me, not really anyway. Our friendship had blossomed in my short trips here and quickly went physical fast, unless she was with someone at the time. I looked at her. “Don’t do that. You can’t say that for me and you don’t know her, so don’t do that.”
“And you know her?” she asked, raising and lifting her hand. “You bring her to the bar. She dances with another guy. You let her borrow your phone and she calls someone else ‘baby’ on the phone. God, Brody, and did you forget you caught her stealing from your wallet?”
I turned my head. “I never said that.”
“But that’s what she was doing. You know that’s what she was about to do.”
If she was, she probably felt she had to. She’d never… not without a reason.
Chloe pushed her hand through her hair. “You need to forget about that girl. She’s fucking weak. And what the fuck would you do with a girl that’s weak as shit?”
Alex wasn’t weak. I only got a snapshot into her life, but that was enough to know she’d been around some folks that didn’t treat her right and people who had to deal with that, the crap life threw at them, weren’t weak. They were the strongest of any of us because they kept on despite the fact.
I buckled my pants. Standing, I rose to get the fuck out of here, but Chloe was in my face.
“She’s all wrong for you. She barely put up a fight when I took her ass for all she had.”
I had to have heard her wrong. Because she wouldn’t go there. I thought her better than that.
But then she had the gall to look smug about it.
“Yeah, I robbed her,” she said, nodding. “Little thing pulled a knife on me, but couldn’t even hold her own for two seconds. I knocked it out of her hand and she didn’t even fight me. She handed over all her cash like a weak little bitch.”
I honed in on her, thinking she should thank God for not making her a guy. If she was, she wouldn’t be standing here like a cocky little shit in front of me. “Give me what you took.”
Her arms moved over her chest. “Sorry?”
She was testing my patience. “I said, give me the money you took from Alex. I won’t ask you again.”
She stared at me, hard, and though she looked like she’d do anything but comply, in the end, she did as I asked her.
Pulling down the front of her top, she stared right in my face. She did so boldly, unrelenting, and when she slid a wad of cash out of her shirt, I wanted to shake my head at both her and myself for not seeing her for her true colors. Or maybe I had, but had just been so lonely on the road I didn’t care. I was paying for that mistake now.
She counted slowly, pulling bill after bill of twenties and even a couple hundreds. God, she took everything from Alex. Everything. She gave me the entire stack and the last thing I cared about was the formality of saying goodbye. I left and she followed me out of her apartment complex and to my truck. My truck. That should have told me what a mess everything was. I wasn’t even on the clock and I came out to see Chloe. I could fuckin’ kick myself a new hide.
I sat behind the wheel and Chloe stood outside, her arms crossed, until I powered the window down. I shrugged my shoulders, shaking my head. I didn’t know what else there was left to say here, but then I realized I did have one thing.
“Was it all bullshit?” I asked, jaw clenched. “About Alex? When you said she was talking to someone else on the phone, calling whoever baby and shit? Did you just make that up?”
It hurt to say. The baby thing and damn, if I couldn’t get that out of my voice.
And finally Chloe’s guard went down a bit, her arms lowering as she stared at me. “No, and I do wish I was. I wasn’t lying, Brody. I really don’t think she’s good for you.”
Again, what would she know about that? Hell, maybe I wasn’t the one worthy of Alex. I had left her after all, no benefit of the doubt given. I didn’t respond and Chloe placed her hands on her hips, sighing.
“You’re really going to do this?” she said, moving in. “To me? I thought we had some good times.”
We had and I wouldn’t deny that. But I fooled myself into thinking we had some kind of friendship beyond the physical, when all I really had was a girl wanting to relieve nothing but an itch and cause some drama along the way. I put my truck into gear, not looking at her.
“You see me roll through town,” I said to her. “Just look away.”
I peeled down the block. There was nothing else really to do here.
Chapter Fourteen
Brody
It took me too few hours to make it back home, cutting more time off the drive than I should have at my speed and during that time, I thought. I thought about Alex and how I’d give anything just to know she was okay. I didn’t know where to begin to find her, where to go, or even if I could. Almost a week had passed since I dropped her off and Alex was resourceful. She already showed her success with hitchhiking. Hell, I’d been one of the ones to pick her up, and what little I managed to sneak into her bag would only help her with that goal. I wouldn’t put it past her to be long gone by now, out of town, and if she managed that, she had to have left hurt. She left hurt and alone without anyone in her corner. And damn, if she hadn’t. I let Chloe manipulate the both of us. I knew Alex wouldn’t steal from me, not unless she felt she had no other option. Chloe put her in a place to consider that.
God, where are you?
I watched the roads through the city like I’d find her, just waiting for me with that smile of hers and those eyes. I should have believed in her. She should
have at least had me.
How fast it took me to get back to the city hit me and I was forced to stop for gas just crossing the city lines. Doing so, I realized my place wasn’t far from here. A few miles really. I didn’t live as far away from town as the rest of my family. When Pop decided to move from the trailer, my younger brother wouldn’t let him have it any other way with his new wealth, I moved back in, offering to take it off his hands. The rent couldn’t be beat, outdoing my old apartment by a landslide, so I figured why not. It was a nice area and I grew up there. Pop moved closer to Gram and I took his old place despite protests and an offer for a new place myself from my brother. I stayed back while everyone else moved forward. I couldn’t help but find that ironic, especially, with the way I chose to go as far as work.
The gas nozzle clicked, my tank full, and I pulled it out of my truck. My reflection could be seen in my window and I cringed, noticing Chloe’s lip gloss on my cheek.
Disgusted, I replaced the gas nozzle, then pulled a towel from above the windshield cleaner. Scrubbing, I rubbed my skin nearly raw, not wanting anything more to do with the girl.
After tossing the towel, I replaced my gas cap. I got back into my truck to go, but when I did, I ended up just sitting there. I sat there with my hands crossed on the wheel. It was like Alex didn’t even exist, she was in my life so briefly. I hadn’t even managed to figure out her favorite color. Shit, her favorite food or what she liked to do on Saturday nights.
I didn’t even know her last name.
Adjusting, I pulled out my phone. I tapped a bit and stopped immediately at the sight of me and her. She did exist. She did and I had proof here in my hands, her hand raised as I snapped a picture of her while we travelled in my truck. It had been on impulse at the time, capturing her, but now, I was glad I had as I still had something of her.
There had to be something I could do, a way to find her. Racking my brain, something did come to me, but it could be grasping at straws. I had a couple buddies I could call in a favor with. They went into the police force after high school. Maybe someone had fit her profile or something over the last week. It wasn’t much of a chance, but it was one.
I did a web search to find the non-emergency line, but my phone illuminated with a number I didn’t recognize.
I answered. “Hello?” And damn, if there wasn’t hope in my voice this was her on the other line. But it wouldn’t be though. I never gave her my number. That fact still didn’t keep my gut from jumping from anticipation.
Sitting there, I waited. I waited, but only silence remained on the other end.
“Hello?” I tried again. Met with more silence, I pulled my phone away, seeing the elapsed time. They didn’t hang up, but they weren’t speaking.
I don’t have time for this.
My thumb hovered over the button to end the call, but then I heard a voice, a small voice. Lifting the phone, I placed it back to my ear. I didn’t catch the voice, but the sniffing on the other end couldn’t be denied.
“Hey, um,” I paused, confused. “Is someone there? Alex? Is that you?”
The voice came immediately.
“Aunt Alex? Aunt Alex…” A gasp sounded in my ear. “My Aunt Alex. Is she there?”
He was a… child.
I slid the phone away, seeing the number. Scrolling around, this number displayed in yet another place: a sent call.
This was who she talked to?
“Aunt Alex?”
I brought the phone to my ear. It all made sense. It all finally made sense. I pushed my hand into my hair. “Uh, hi. Hello?” I didn’t know what to say. This was her… nephew?
“Please. Please,” he begged, the little kid. “Is she there?”
I let out a breath, wishing she was. “I’m sorry. She’s not. This is Brody though. Her friend. I think she called you the other day on my phone.”
And then one of the most horrible sounds radiated within my ears. It was something I hated, something that killed me any time my little niece would fall or hurt herself playing. It was the sound of agony. The sound of a child’s pain.
“Where is she…” he said, the tears muffling his voice. He sniffed. “She promised she’d be here days ago, but then told me she couldn’t the other day. I asked her why and she wouldn’t tell me. Now, she hasn’t called. She calls every night. Please. Where is she?”
Every night. She called every night. Her watch. Her watch went off two times when I was with her at the same time both nights and I couldn’t deny the connection.
“She always calls…” he repeated. Crying so much, it was so hard to hear him at this point. “She always calls.”
The words quite literally sent a sharp strike into my heart. If she didn’t call something happened. If she didn’t call something wasn’t okay.
My breath went heavy, swallow. My head swam and I sat back, trying to fight the rush in my head.
Just stay cool. Just breathe.
With a few breaths, I got it back. The tears on the other end of the line continued, the agony, and I had a choice to make. I could tell this kid again his aunt wasn’t here or I could give him a sense of security, one his aunt should have had the whole time.
“Hey,” I said, preparing to sound nothing but confident in what I was about to tell him. “I did say she wasn’t here, but that’s only because I’m about to go pick her up.”
His breath settled a bit, the tears subsiding, and when he spoke, I was grateful to hear some of that terror leave his voice.
“She… You’re going to get her?”
I nodded like this kid could see. “Yep. She’s waiting for me. She’s waiting for me to come and get her, and when I do, she’s gonna call you, buddy. You’ll be the first person she calls. I’ll make sure of it.”
He whimpered, but this time, it didn’t sound so sad. “Thanks.”
I smiled. “No, problem.”
“Can you tell her I made something at school for her today? She asked for a drawing with red color. I used extra crayon.”
I feathered my hand through my hair and my lips couldn’t help lifting. “Sure thing. Don’t worry. I’ll make sure she gets the message.”
I got a few more thanks, a few more sniffs, and then he finally let me go. Starting my truck, I didn’t hesitate behind the wheel. I took off as I had someone’s aunt to pick up.
She was waiting for me.
*
I started with my buddies in the force, calling in that favor, and truth be told, they said Alex fit the physical description of many girls they encountered on their day to day. Especially, if she wore her wig and outfit I met her in. We had some rough neighborhoods and that description wasn’t uncommon for girls on the streets. Still, they said they’d keep an active look out. I thanked them, grateful, but they were wrong about one thing. They were wrong about Alex being so similar to girls that maybe looked and dressed like her. Alex… she was different and that was the point.
I travelled long, rolling through the neighborhoods in the areas closest to where I dropped her off, and my first stop was the train station. The guys told me not to get my hopes up too much with that tactic. Too many days had passed since I left her and the odds of her staying in the area were slim. I had to try though. I had to hope. I even went inside the station and got no leads. No one who worked there recalled seeing her. No one.
“Why don’t you try calling the local shelters?” Chad, one of my buddies suggested. “She might be staying there or had in the past. We’ll give them a head’s up you’ll be calling so they don’t give you any issues.”
He gave me a list he brought up in his cruiser. Parking, I went down it call after all. The city didn’t have many shelters, but a healthy few. On the fourth try, I’d been prepared to say this led to another dead end. The lady on the phone told me no and everything, but then she said wait. She said wait and my heart stopped.
My heart hoped.
“You said she could have short hair?” she asked me. “Cute, like Halle Berry?”
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And damn, if Alex didn’t give even her a run for her money with her beauty. I swallowed. “Yeah. That’s what her hair looks like under the wig.” I honestly, barely mentioned that to the other three places. I figured she’d be trying to hide behind her wig. She had so long with me until she trusted me.
“And her name again?” the woman asked.
“Alex. I don’t know her last name.”
Why hadn’t I bothered to get that? I bet it was a good one, too. One that fit her like…
“Vaughn? Alex Vaughn. Female. She also put down Alexa when she signed in. Does that sound familiar?”
This woman didn’t know it, but she curbed a feeling that hadn’t let up since the night I let Alex go, since the night I lost her.
“Uh, yeah,” I said, pushing my hand over my mouth. I couldn’t believe it. She found her. I mean, it was a possibility this couldn’t be her. But I… I just had a feeling. “She goes by Alexa, too.”
“I think this is her. She had a wig fitting your early description in her bag. We have to check residents’ belongings before we allow them to stay here. Safety precaution, you know? They also have to register and she did without complaint. A very nice girl, she seemed.”
My face fell at the words. She said seemed, as in past tense.
She continued. “Unfortunately, I was forced to deny her access to the facility a few nights ago.”
“How many nights?” I asked, getting a pen to write this all down. Anything would help.
“I’d say about three?” She could still be here in town. “She stayed with us one night, but came in late the second. We have a strict curfew here. I’m very sorry.”
What she said was all right. She and the shelter she worked for provided safety for Alex for at least a night and I couldn’t be mad at that. I lowered my pen. “Do you possibly know where she might have been headed? Did she mention anything or…”
She sighed and I didn’t continue. “I’m sorry. We just get so many people here. It’s hard to keep track.”
But she did have something. A concrete place Alex had been within the last seventy-two hours. I could drive through the area and ask around. I sat back. “Hey, uh, it’s okay. You definitely gave me something. This will help.”
Brody Page 10
