I toss the empty bag into the trashcan. I know there is a football game going on out back, so I head outside. If I can’t play on a team, this is the next best thing.
Taking off my hoodie, I throw it onto the bench next to the grass and jog out onto the field, hoping they have room for another player. I recognize most of the guys since they’re pretty much here every week. “You guys got room for me?”
The bigger one making the calls waves me over. I look like an athlete, so I always get picked to play. Scratch that. I am athletic. Just because I’ve never played on a team doesn’t mean any of these guys are better than me. Trust me, I can run circles around most kids.
WHEN MOM AND I pull up to the center, it reminds me of the neighborhood I saw in an old movie once about gangs, but the location is a far cry from where I spend my time. I’m used to a different… honestly… a snooty environment. Broken sidewalk entrance, graffiti-filled block walls, and just enough music blasting from the ongoing traffic paint the perfect movie-making scenario.
I love the adventure of new places. I’m not one to shy away from change. As we get out of the car, Mom tries to talk to me about how we’re no different than others. “Mom, seriously, are we having this conversation?”
“I just don’t want you to think we are any better than those that come here.”
“Why would I think that? I’m not that shallow, Mom.”
“I’m not saying you’re shallow. You’re just not used to this environment.”
“Now you sound shallow.”
She gives me a little smirk and says, “Touché, my girl.” I smile.
Mom opens the doors, and I hate to admit it, but the center does smell like a dirty locker room. I won’t tell Jules that, though. Immediately, a man comes up to us, introducing himself as the director of the center. Mom starts to talk to him while I set the box of books next to her.
“I’m going to look around,” I quietly tell her. She nods.
I walk aimlessly through the large room. Everyone is busy, and I feel out of place. When I see double doors leading to the outside, I go up and peer out the window, noticing a bunch of boys playing football.
Perfect.
I walk out.
AFTER PLAYING FOR a while, I start to feel unusually warm, so I lift the bottom of my shirt to wipe the sweat. I’m in the middle of our huddle when a distracting voice chimes in asking to join our game, and as we break apart, I see who’s attached to that soft voice.
I see her.
Wiping the sweat out of my eyes, I try to get a clear view. She’s tiny. I’d say a couple of years younger than me. She’s wearing white, ratty, barely-tied Converse, and her hair is dark brown and long. As she stands there with her hands on her hips, everyone ignores her.
But I’m drawn to her.
I look down at her shoes as I start walking toward her. She’s wearing a pink tank top with little flowers on it. I get closer, seeing dark curls hanging loosely down her back. Her hair looks really soft.
I’m in front of her. I smell coconuts, reminding me of a tropical sunscreen and summer. She’s trying to look tough, or maybe it’s confidence, while I’m trying to breathe properly. The boys start teasing her about girls not playing football, and she looks away. Why, I don’t know, but the strangest feeling hits me. It’s like a glow is cast behind her, making her look like an angel.
That’s so stupid.
It’s hotter than hell out here, and the sun’s bright rays are making me squint that I’m practically seeing red spots. I’m probably dehydrated and need some water. Suddenly, she turns toward me, and we make eye contact. I swallow hard and stare. She’s all bright blue eyes, and the prettiest face I’ve ever seen. Then she gives me the biggest stink eye. “Are you going to let me play?”
I’m startled, knowing that mean little face has the sweetest voice attached to it. I almost want to laugh. It’s like she’s trying hard to be tough. We’re a pretty intimidating bunch of guys. She’s definitely not from around here.
All of a sudden that rush of warmth I felt a few minutes ago radiates inside me again, and my usual confidence is in my throat. She has the biggest, deepest, and bluest eyes I’ve ever seen. She takes her hands off her hips, glances around at the other boys, and then brings her attention back to me. Her hair practically hits me in the face, knocking me right back to reality.
I actually feel like the earth just moved. “Did you just feel that?” I blurt out, but then look down at my feet, feeling out of sorts.
“Feel what?” she says in the cutest tone. My ears perk up. I’m trying to mentally turn up my hearing volume, if that’s even fucking possible. Damn, I’m glad I didn’t say that out loud. Something tells me I wouldn’t want to swear in front of this girl. She might be in the no swear zone.
“I think we just had another earthquake.”
She licks her lips. “No, I didn’t feel anything, but I didn’t feel the one last night, either. I slept like a baby through it. Maybe it’s an aftershock,” she says carelessly.
“Yeah, maybe,” I say in return, rubbing my stomach and causing my shirt to rise. Is it just me? My stomach feels weird.
“So, can I play?” She’s completely oblivious to the feeling that just hit me. She stares at me like I’m a moron, but I can’t help it. I don’t know how to explain it. I’ve never felt like this when I’ve looked at a girl before. I can’t stop staring into her eyes. They look wide at me. There had to have just been another little earthquake. I look around, and everyone is waiting on me. “Hell-o,” she says, rolling her eyes.
I clear my throat. “Um, yeah, you can play. Do you know how to play football?”
She looks annoyed. “Do you think because I’m a girl I can’t play? Trust me, I know the game.”
I just smile at her, because honestly, I can’t focus on what she’s saying to me. I feel like I’m on a cloud with an angel. Turning back to the guys, who are growing impatient, I let them know I’ll take her on my team.
Returning my smile, she takes a hairband from her small wrist and puts her hair up into a high ponytail, making her big blue eyes look larger like a porcelain doll’s. A pretty doll, not one of those creepy ones they put in scary movies.
I’m mesmerized. Is it possible to fall in love at thirteen? Because I think I just looked into the eyes of the girl I want to look at forever.
SHE STARTS RUNNING onto the field with all the guys, leaving me trying to shake off this feeling I’m having. I clear my throat, so my question doesn’t come out weak. “Hey, what’s your name?”
Turning back to me, while still jogging toward the game, she answers, “I’m Shay.” Even her name is pretty. She yells back with that voice I’m quickly putting to memory. “What’s yours?”
“I’m Jace,” I answer as she smiles. Shay and Jace… I swear, I just saw my fairy tale.
“Thanks for letting me play with you, Jace. I won’t let you down,” she says in her quiet voice.
We play for quite a while, and I watch Shay more than I pay attention to the game. I call my team for a huddle.
“Okay.” I look at Trent and Devonne. “I’m going to throw a long pass. Trent, I’m going to fake it to you while Devonne runs down field.”
The guys nod.
Ratty Converse sneakers push their way through the huddle to the middle of us. Squinting her blues into mine, Shay looks up to me.
“That is so predictable, Jace. They’re going to totally expect that. Those two have been running the ball the whole game.” She puts her hands on her hips again. She seems to do that a lot. I look down to her with wide eyes at the way she takes control and notice a flower painted on her pinkie nail.
“What do you suggest?” Trent asks with humor as he glances at her smugly, clearly being an ass.
“Well, I happen to be pretty fast. I’ll run down field, and trust me, I’ll score.”
“You sure sound confident,” Devonne says.
Shay reaches into her pocket, pulling out her chapstick.
“See?” Trent says with a huff. “She’s worried about putting fucking lipstick on. You can’t throw it to her, Jace.”
My jaw tightens from Trent’s disrespectful mouth. “Easy with your words, bro,” I say, earning an eye roll from him.
Shay doesn’t concern herself; instead, she puts the biggest smile on my face I think I’ve ever had when she says, “It’s not lipstick. It’s chapstick. Excuse me for having dry lips.”
I can’t help but chuckle. She just shut down a 175-pound guy from the inner city. Trent rolls his eyes. “Whatever,” he says. “Don’t screw it up, powder puff.”
“Not possible,” Shay says. “They’ll never see it coming. Trust me, Jace.”
Something in the way she says that settles my nerves.
“Trust me, Jace.”
“Okay, let’s do it.” I look down at her and smile. She smiles wide, and then everyone takes their place on the field. The ball snaps, and guess what?
She fucking scores.
WE SPEND THE whole day together. Shay is like the ray of sunshine that shines brightly between my apartment buildings. As soon as she walked between that building,
I knew the sun would shine down on that cold space. Even in her worn jeans and dirty Converse, she still looks soft… sweet. What's wrong with me? Guys like me don't think like this. Guys where I come from don't daydream of Disney princesses and happily-ever-afters. Not really anyway. Even when I do, I know it’s not possible to have a girl like her.
“Told you I could play,” Shay says, pulling me out of my dreamland reserved for kids whose dreams become realities.
“Um… yeah, you sure showed them you could hang,” I reply, hoping I'm keeping up with her conversation, seeing as I'm still picturing her sprinkling pixie dust around us.
“Well, like I said, I know the game.” She reaches up with her light pink fingernails and takes her hair out of the holder. As it falls, soft brown curls frame her face, and all I can think about is how pretty she is. Then she smiles at me with the prettiest smile I’ve ever seen. I don’t even think she’ll need braces, or maybe she’s already had them. Anyway, her teeth are really straight, and her smile lights up her whole face.
I think my heart just skipped a beat. No, it did. It totally skipped a beat, and I have no doubt we had another earthquake. Or, maybe Shay just shook my world when she entered it. Yeah, I’m pretty sure she did.
“Nice to meet you, Jace. I’ve got to go.” Shay reaches into her pocket, taking out her chapstick. Rolling it around on her pouty lips, she smacks them together before shoving it back into her pocket. I smell coconut again.
“See you around,” I say without breaking eye contact. God, I sound like such a wimp. I don't talk like that. But, I can't form any words around this girl, so I just wave. She waves back. I hear the guys calling me back to the game, but all I can focus on is the pretty girl with big blue eyes walking away from me. I watch until she disappears through the double doors of the center. I don’t know how to explain it, but I feel a sense of loss when she leaves.
The parking lot is on the side of the building, so I jog over to see if I can watch her leave. A fancy limo pulls up. That's odd. We don't have limos hanging out at the center. Maybe the driver is just using the parking lot to turn around. I watch it come to a stop, and the driver gets out and walks around the back and opens the passenger side door. I wait, but nobody gets out. As the driver begins to step aside, I see his face break out into a huge grin, and then I see Shay. She high fives him and jumps into the limo followed by an older lady… maybe her mom. I don’t know if she came to the center with anyone. The driver closes the door. I just stand there and watch her leave.
I don't know if I'll ever see her again. All I do know is the prettiest girl I've ever seen just got into a limo and left.
YOU KNOW HOW you read about falling in love? Like the time stands still moment? The moment of all moments.
It’s like that series I read about the girl finding her perfect boy. The heroine falls in love with the rich, preppy boy, and everything is picture-perfect. That’s not how it always happens, though. Not in real life. Even Jules and I snickered and rolled our eyes while reading that. I mean, seriously, how is everyone so good-looking and perfect? And, really, how many guys do you fall in love with within a year? Four. That girl in the book fell in love with four boys in less than a year. How stupid. That’s so unrealistic. That’s not love; that’s just a confused girl with no morals.
Now I’m questioning why I ever read those books. Oh yeah, I really liked one of the boys. My moment isn’t quite like that, and, yes, I’ve totally had my moment. I had a “real moment,” the time-stood-still moment. The moment when your eyes meet and you just know he’s going to be the one.
I found him at a run-down community center—messy black hair, the palest blue eyes I’ve ever seen, T-shirt obviously too small for him, and jeans. He isn’t the perfect book boy package Jules and I read about; he’s just a boy. A boy that is far from what I am used to hanging out with. A boy that has an edge. Jules and I call it “the bad boy look.” A very cute bad boy look, I might add.
The thing is, he isn’t bad. He is the sweetest boy I’ve ever laid eyes on, and my eyes were fixated on him the entire time.
Once I get home from the center, I call Jules and tell her I have fallen in love. My fate has been sealed. She laughs into the phone and says, “You’re only twelve years old, Shay. There’s no way you fell in love today. You need to get your nose out of those fairy-tale books.” Then she completely changes the subject. “I’m coming over to go swimming.”
After she hangs up with me, I walk over to my desk that has my homemade calendar sitting on top and grab a pink colored pencil from the glass jar that holds all my pencils. I draw the biggest pink heart around October 14th, marking the day I met him. I know cheesy, right? Don’t laugh. Then I totally write in my best cursive a “J” and an “S” and add, “the day I fell in love,” just to give myself a little reminder. Really, I know I’ve fallen in love. You just don’t get that feeling. You know the one—butterflies swarming in your belly, heart racing uncontrollably when he looks into your eyes, and heated cheeks from his intense stare.
Okay, wait.
I need to get a grip. Jules is right. I’ve read way too many books. I’m only twelve. I couldn’t possibly have fallen in love. He’s just a really dreamy boy. By the way, I didn’t let him see how he affected me. One thing I’ve learned about the entertainment business is never let them see your nerves. So, of course, I didn’t let Jace know that I thought he was dreamy. I just acted like he was one of the boys, instead of the boy.
THE NEXT COUPLE of weeks go by painfully slow. I can’t wait to go back to the community center to see if my future husband is there. I’m just kidding.
Not really.
I’m being totally serious.
He probably doesn’t even remember me. Why would a tough boy like Jace remember a sassy little girl like me? He’s totally older than me and probably already has a girlfriend. I’m still a tween.
I SEARCH HIGH and low at my house to find some money to catch a bus. I hope Shay comes to the center, or I could have bought a Slurpee with that money. I have no idea if I’ll see her today. It’s been two weeks. Two weeks of disappointment. Two weeks of wondering if I will ever see her again.
Two long weeks.
I thought about skipping the center today. I didn’t want to get my hopes up only to be once again disappointed. I’ve started to feel like a lovesick puppy over a girl I just met. Maybe she’s a one-and-done encounter. We had fun. I’ve never played football with a girl before. I’ve never wanted to sit and talk to a girl before. Not like I did with her. I still can’t wrap my head around it. Maybe it’s just hormones. I mean, I’m thirteen. Aren’t I supposed to be at that stage? That’s probably it. My hormones surfaced right when I looked at her. It’s like when Cupid’s arrow hits you, and you never see it coming.
That must be it.
&n
bsp; Right when my body’s raging hormones hit, Shay was in my path. I looked at her, and mentally I woke up to exploring girls. So, here I am: waiting for disappointment again. Just sitting here like a pathetic boy waiting on a girl that I have no idea will show.
AFTER A BORING game of football, I decide to go home. Grabbing my backpack, I tell the guys I’m leaving and head to the door. Disappointment floods my mind. I wish I could shake the endless thoughts of Shay.
Since I don’t have sunglasses, my eyes are cast down from the sun. Right before I grab the door handle, the door pushes open, and I look up.
Everything stops.
The blue-eyed beauty that has invaded every second of my days since the moment I met her is staring at me. Then she speaks. “Hi, Jace.” I just stand in front of her, speechless. “You probably don’t remember me. I’m Shay.” She smiles shyly.
She’s here.
That’s all I can think about as she looks at me, waiting for me to reply.
She’s here.
I swallow all the anticipation, all the worry, and all the giddy feelings I’ve had for her the last two weeks and move out of the way so she can walk through the door. She smiles at me again.
Wow, she has a great smile. I try to regain my tough, confident exterior and act as though I’m unaffected by her presence, like I haven’t stayed up at night wondering if I’d ever see her again.
Glancing up at me, she repeats, “Hi.” She says it all bubbly and full of life. It’s like she doesn’t have a care in the world.
“H-hey…” I stutter at a loss for words.
“You totally forgot me,” she says hesitantly.
Like I’d forget her name.
Labeled Love Page 4
