by Abby Weeks
She wondered if it might be easier just to let Murdoch rat her out to Serge. Maybe Serge wouldn’t even give a crap about what she’d done with Bill. She was a hooker for Christ’s sake. What difference did it make if she sucked someone off in the back room for a little extra tip? How many strip joints was Serge overseeing? Maybe eight? How many girls was that? They must be up to all sorts of shit. What would he care if she’d broken a rule with Caribou Bill?
She sighed. Maybe she would have tried that and let Murdoch rat her out if it wasn’t for the story Bill had told her in the booth. It sounded like Serge was going off the handle a little more than usual. If he was letting himself slip into jealous rages it might not be the best time to test him.
It would be safer to let Murdoch have his way with her, but just this once. She’d give him a little sugar, let him have what he wanted, and then they’d both have something on each other. If he ever brought up what she’d done with Bill, she’d bring up the fact that he’d held it over her to fuck her, and Serge would likely knock the shit out of him.
One night. She could manage that.
She got in the car and lit another cigarette. The house she shared with Murdoch was two miles up the highway along a rutted, potholed driveway lined with eerie white spruce trees. She was a little drunk to be driving but there was never any traffic on that road and she didn’t pass any other cars.
She pulled up outside the house and stumbled in. She kicked off her boots at the door and went in through the kitchen. The place was a mess. It was a complete pigsty, as if vagrants lived there. It was cold and damp and the kitchen table was covered with beer cans, dirty dishes, and various bits of trash. Rose went over to the fridge and took a beer from the filthy mess of rotting leftovers and half empty condiment bottles that filled the shelves.
She tried to turn on the light but then remembered that the bulb had blown a few days earlier and hadn’t been repaired.
She went down the hall to her bedroom and lay on her bed. There was a lamp by her bed and thankfully it still worked. She popped open the beer and took a long drink from it. Then she got under the covers, still dressed in all her clothes. It was so cold and damp in the room that she could see her breath. Sometimes when he got home Murdoch put on the furnace and that warmed the place up a little. A lot of nights he was too drunk to do it. She would have gladly put it on herself but she didn’t know how to operate it.
She sat on the bed under her blanket and stared at the door to her room. She sipped the beer. Every time she heard a sound she moved with a start. She thought it was Murdoch. She sat there and waited for him. Her grip on the beer can was so tight that she’d crushed it without even realizing it.
When she finally heard Murdoch’s bike pulling up outside the house about an hour later her cheeks were streaked with tears and a mess of mascara had run down from her eyes.
*
SHE SHUT OFF THE LIGHT and waited for him. She wasn’t sure what to expect. Murdoch had tried to have his way with her before, many times, but this was the first time that she would be allowing him to do what he wanted. This was the first time she wouldn’t be resisting.
It felt strange. Usually she would have her dresser up against the door by now. Tonight was different. She wasn’t doing anything. She was just waiting. The sooner he came in, the sooner it would be over. For the second time that night she would be giving some old, decrepit biker something that he had no right to.
She listened as he shut off the bike, stumbled in through the front door and helped himself to a beer from the fridge, just as she had an hour earlier.
“Rosey,” he called out.
It made her skin crawl. She wished she was anywhere else in the world.
She told herself to remember this moment. The next time she felt like being stupid, or naive, or weak, or trusting, the next time she felt even the tiniest bit like being a human being, she would remember this moment and think better of it.
*
WHEN SHE HEARD THE BEDROOM door open she was hidden under the covers of her bed, shivering. She’d already shut off the lamp. The room was pitch dark.
Murdoch was stumbling around in the dark, knocking things over.
“What the fuck?” he said. “You in here?”
She didn’t answer.
“Come on now, sweetie,” he said. “This aint going to take more than a minute.”
She controlled her breathing. She was having a hard time keeping her breath steady. She had so much fear and so much rage pent up inside her, mixed together, that it was hard even to think straight.
“I’m here,” she said, quietly from under the covers.
“That’s my girl,” Murdoch said.
She found him so repulsive. She knew it was her own stupid fault she was in this situation, she had no one to blame but herself, but all the anger she had right now was directed at Murdoch.
Murdoch turned the lamp back on. The light revealed the situation in all its hideousness. Murdoch was leering at her, his face distorted by lust. His eyes were hungry for her. She’d seen that look in his eyes before. It seemed he turned into some sort of a monster before having sex. She didn’t understand how men could be so desperate as to fuck women who obviously didn’t want them. It didn’t seem natural to her but then what was natural about the situation she was in?
Murdoch pulled down the blankets that were covering Rose and threw them to the floor.
“You’re still dressed,” he said, disappointed.
What the hell did he expect? This was practically rape as far as she was concerned.
“It’s freezing in here,” she said.
He looked at her, his hungry, greedy eyes seemingly feeding on her already.
“Now, now,” he said, “there’s no need to be testy. We had an agreement.”
“This is hardly an agreement, Murdoch,” she said.
Murdoch held up his hands, his palms, open, as if protesting his innocence to a cop who had a gun pointed at him. “Alright,” he said, “if you’d rather we just told Serge everything that happened and leave the matter up to him, I’m fine with that.”
Rose thought about it. She wondered if that might actually be the easier course to take. No one even knew she’d asked Bill for help. All they knew was that she’d sucked him off. But she couldn’t take the risk. If Serge spoke to Bill about it, Bill would say what had happened and then what? Serge had certainly killed dancers for trying to escape. She knew that much.
Not asking the customers for help was the biggest rule the club had for dancers. It was the most serious violation too. It was terrible for business. No one wanted to see a girl begging for help, at least not in the kinds of strip clubs that the DRMC ran. They weren’t places for sympathy and compassion. They were places where the women kept their goddamn mouths shut and took off their clothes. It was terrible for business to have your dancers asking for help. It reflected poorly on the club, made the DRMC look weak and like they couldn’t control their girls. It also attracted the attention of the law, something that the club definitely didn’t want. No, she couldn’t risk Serge finding out what she’d said to Bill.
She pulled off her sweater, then reached around and unclasped her bra, revealing her tits to Murdoch’s hungry gaze.
“That’s my girl,” he said, staring at her breasts, “but it aint your tits I’m interested in.”
“What?”
“Turn around and show me that tight little asshole of yours,” he said, a snarl like that of a mean dog spread across his face.
“What?” she said again. She knew she sounded stupid.
“Just turn around, you little bitch,” he said.
She knew she had no choice. She was committed to this now. There was no way around it, no way out of it. Whatever Murdoch wanted from her, he was going to get.
She pulled off her jeans and underpants and threw them to the ground. She was completely naked now. Murdoch was licking his lips, the lust on his face making him look absolutely hideous. He
looked like an animal moving in for the kill.
Rose turned around and got on her hands and knees with her back to him. If he wanted to take her in the ass, then let him do it and let it be over.
“Are you going to use a condom?” she said.
Murdoch didn’t answer. She closed her eyes and heard the sound of him spit. Then she felt the saliva on her ass, sliding slowly down the crack of her asshole, over her anus.
“That’s not going to do it,” she said. “You’re going to need some lube.”
She wondered if Murdoch had ever fucked a girl in the ass before. She wondered if this was his first time doing it. She’d experienced it a few times before although never really by choice. When Serge was in town it often happened, either by him or by one of his lowlife friends. It wasn’t exactly that they raped her. It was more that she did exactly what they wanted without ever protesting because she knew what would happen to her if she gave any trouble. Everything she did was under duress but she was too afraid to actually resist. Thankfully, it wasn’t every week that Serge went after her. Often when he came into town he’d be so high on drugs that he wouldn’t be able to get it up. He’d make Rose strip for him, she’d dance on his lap, but he wouldn’t actually be able to fuck her.
She wasn’t getting away with anything tonight. She looked over her shoulder and saw Murdoch’s firm, erect penis. He wasn’t having any trouble getting it up tonight. Usually she always fought Murdoch off. He wasn’t as scary as Serge and the other BRMC riders. Murdoch had managed to have his way with her for the first few months after she’d arrived, but pretty soon she’d built up enough courage to resist him.
Tonight, she was giving him a free pass.
“What do I need?” he said.
“Haven’t you ever done this before?”
It was his first time. She was surprised. She would have thought that an old, seasoned biker like him, someone who made it a habit of trying to rape her the entire first couple of months she was there, would have had anal sex before in his life.
He continued pressing the head of his thick cock against her anus but it still wouldn’t go in.
“Don’t you have some vaseline or jelly or something?” she said.
This was even more humiliating than she’d imagined. Not only did she have to let him do this but she actually had to give him instructions on how to do it properly too.
“Wait here,” Murdoch said.
Rose shook her head. Murdoch was an idiot, there was no doubt about it. Sometimes she was scared of him but all she had to remember is how stupid and inept he was and she could usually get her courage back.
“Where do you think I’m going to go?” she said.
Murdoch left and a moment later came back with a jar of vaseline that Rose had bought to put on her heels.
“Get back in position,” he said to her.
Rose got back on her hands and knees and looked at the wall.
“I’m going to let you do this,” she said, “but then we’re even.”
Murdoch took a thick dab of the vaseline and without any warning pressed his finger right into her anus.
“Jesus,” she said.
He pushed his finger in deep, all the way. Rose gasped. The sensation of it was overwhelming. She felt her eyes water as his finger slid all the way into her anus and then came back out.
“Okay,” he said. He got up on his knees and pressed the tip of his rock hard cock against her greased asshole. It hurt as he pressed, as hard as he could, against her ass. His cock wouldn’t go in, but he kept up the pressure and a moment later it slipped into her vagina.
That shocked her too. She hadn’t been ready for it. She cried out. Murdoch’s hard, throbbing cock had just rammed deep into her pussy.
“Oh, yeah,” he cried out, “is that it?”
“That’s my pussy, dumb ass.”
She could feel him hesitate as he thought about whether or not to pull out of her vagina. It probably felt really good to have his cock in there. After all, that was the hole that nature had designed for it.
But he pulled out.
“This is my one chance to do this,” he said and took another thick dab of vaseline from the jar.
Rose sighed. Her pussy was coated in vaseline. It was so slippery it almost excited her.
“Look,” she said, “if you’re going to do this, you’ve got to loosen me up first.”
“You mean like foreplay?”
“No, not like foreplay. You’ve got to loosen my asshole, dummy. It’s not like it’s designed to have something as large as your cock shoved up into it.”
“With my fingers?”
“Yes.”
Rose gasped again as Murdoch’s long index finger pushed in past the muscle, into her anus. She felt like an animal that was being checked before purchase. The sensation in her asshole was overwhelming.
“Okay,” she said, “now twist it around a little.”
Murdoch seemed pleased to be getting her cooperation. For the second time that night, she decided to numb her mind as much as possible and try not to register all of the details of what was happening. This was her life now. She’d been here in this place for almost two years. She didn’t know when she would be getting away. Murdoch had her. If he wanted to fuck her in the ass, she might as well make the experience pass as painlessly and quickly as possible.
“Now get another finger in there,” she said, “carefully.”
“I’ll be gentle,” he said, and then he forced a second finger into her anus, next to the first.
He now had his index and middle finger in there. Rose gasped as she felt him slide in.
“Jesus,” she cried.
“You alright?”
“I’m alright. Just go slowly.”
Murdoch shoved his fingers into her asshole as far as they would go and then began rotating them, opening up the hole of her ass, stretching and loosening the muscle.
“That’s it,” she said. “Just go slow.”
Murdoch kept moving both fingers around, stretching her out gradually and then slid a third finger into her anus too.
“Okay, stop” she said as the third finger pressed in and stretched her anus as far as it could go. “That should be enough. Try now.”
He took his hand out of her and pressed the tip of his hard cock against her anus again. It wouldn’t go in. She could feel him pressing it against her, she could feel the rigid cock forcing itself against her asshole but he wasn’t pressing hard enough.
“Don’t be afraid,” she said. “Just go for it.”
“Will it hurt you?”
“I’ll be okay,” she said.
She couldn’t believe that she was having to talk him through the entire process. He was supposed to be forcing her to do this. Now she was walking him through it.
He thrust against her ass again and this time, in a shock of sensation that flooded through her entire body, she felt his rock hard, rigid cock slide deep up into her asshole.
She screamed out, more from surprise than from any pain.
“Are you okay?” he said again.
“Yes,” she grunted.
It was overpowering, the feeling of it was almost too much, but it wasn’t pain. She could handle it.
“Fuck me,” she said, and she didn’t have to say anything after that.
Murdoch began ramming her anus with his hard, thick cock, driving it deep up into her asshole. She screamed out from the sensation of it and that only seemed to excite him even farther.
“Oh yeah,” he cried out.
Rose screamed as he continued to pound his rod deep into her. She was looking at the wall and she tried to picture an attractive man as she was being fucked. She couldn’t do it. All she could see were the faces of Murdoch, and Caribou Bill, and Serge Gauthier and all the other awful lowlifes she was surrounded by in this place. She even pictured Rex Savage’s face. These were all men she hated, and it was sad that she couldn’t see anyone but them when she tried to imagine
a man. It was like all the good memories she had of things that had happened before she’d been captured and taken to this place were fading. She wondered if the day would come when all she could remember would be this place. She imagined if she stayed here long enough, if she could’t find a way to escape, then that was what would happen. This would be all she would ever know. The members of the DRMC, the customers of the Cat, those men would fuck her and abuse her till they were done with her and then her life would be over.
She shuddered at the thought of that, of spending all the rest of her life up there in that desolate, godforsaken place. For the rest of her life she would be fucked and gawked at by horny, disgusting men until she was no longer of any use to them. Was that really all she had to look forward to?
As if to answer her, Murdoch thrust hard into her anus and began orgasming. She could feel the pulsing throb of his penis as it began to reach its ultimate climax. Then she felt the sticky jets of semen flying up into her rectum, filling her up. He hadn’t worn a condom. His cock shot streaks of wet, hot jizz right into her and she cried out from the sensation of it. Murdoch screamed too.
Then he pulled out of her and collapsed onto the bed. Rose remained in the position she was in, staring at the wall. For some reason, she couldn’t move. She didn’t want to be lying on the bed next to Murdoch as the pleasure of his orgasm wafted over him so she refused to lie down.
Murdoch’s dog was outside. Rose remained in position, listening to his dog outside the window, barking like a crazy animal. Murdoch’s semen slowly slid out of her asshole and down her thighs, onto the bedsheets that she would be sleeping on in the cold, dark dampness of that prison that was her life.
VI
ROSE AND MURDOCH WERE A little edgy on Thursday. The prospect of having Serge come out to the bar was always a stressful one. A lot of the time he was easygoing, he wasn’t strict on the standards that they kept the Velvet Cat to, but he was unpredictable, uncontrollable, and sometimes he could be terribly violent.
