There it was, exactly as Joseph had warned. Sarah was planning to leave, most likely as soon as arrangements could be made. He had no choice. He had to ask her now, or she would soon be gone. His boys needed her, so he would do it for them. Feeling uncomfortable with what he was about to request, Daniel had to force himself to speak. “Sarah, there is something I must ask you. It is difficult, however, as my request may render you speechless.”
“What is it, Daniel? By the serious look on your face, it must be something dreadful.”
In hearing her words, Daniel felt awful. He had no wish for her to think marrying her would be a dreadful thing. “It is nothing of the sort. Still, I hope you shall not misunderstand my reasons for asking.” Not knowing any other way to broach the subject, he spoke the question straightforwardly. “Sarah, would you consider marrying me so you might remain here with us? Joseph told me what happened at church. None of us want you to go. This would be the only way to go on as we have been.” After asking Sarah such a ridiculous question, he paused—hoping for an answer—but not really believing she would consent.
Stunned, Sarah swallowed hard. “What? No! I could never do that to Joanna. Anyway, since we are friends, it would be rather awkward for us both.”
As much as he expected that kind of a reaction, Daniel still hoped he could convince her. “Sarah, you may not believe this but with her last breath Joanna requested that we marry. She believed that you would care for the boys much as she would have—with love and tenderness.”
Eyes wide, not fully comprehending what Daniel had said, for clarity she questioned, “This was Joanna’s wish, then?”
“Yes, Sarah, it was. I was not for it at first, but I now see the wisdom in it. As you say, we are friends, good friends, are we not?”
“Well, yes, Daniel, but—”
“I know it seems rather strange to us now, but you have married for practicality’s sake before. It wasn’t so terrible, was it?” He then remembered what he had thought the first time he realized what kind of marriage Alexander and Sarah Swyndhurst had entered into at the start, though it later changed to a loving relationship. At the time, he couldn’t fathom ever doing such a thing. But here he was, suggesting precisely that kind of a marriage to Sarah.
Looking thoughtful, she responded, “No. But, Daniel, that was different. I hadn’t even met Alexander until shortly before our wedding day. You and I have known each other for some time now. And your wife was my very best friend. To be married to you…it would be so…well, it’s just absurd.” She couldn’t think of a suitable way to describe how she felt about his request.
Daniel had been uncertain about the prospect of marrying Sarah, but now he sensed that Sarah would see the arrangement for what it was—merely an understanding between friends. She wouldn’t expect anything more. Now he just had to convince her that it was the right thing to do.
“Sarah, nothing would have to change between us. We could go on exactly as we have been. I need someone to look after the boys, and you are alone, apart from your servants and Alexander’s father—who, from what you have said, will return to England one day. Moreover, I believe Alexander would wish for you to be here, safe with us. Not to mention your father, who never wanted you alone and unprotected, as evidenced by his having arranged a marriage of this kind for you before.”
Sarah was beginning to give way. It does seem practical. I could look after the boys while he is out on calls. And I would have a family, of sorts. As I am never to have children of my own, I would dearly love to help finish raising two such wonderful boys. Daniel is not going to expect anything more of me than what we have now—a friendship. “Daniel, if we do this, you would never change your mind and expect…ah…traditional marriage, would you?” She was fairly certain he never would, but she had to be sure.
Daniel could see that Sarah was seriously considering his offer. He understood her fears about things altering after they were wed, for that had happened in her marriage to Alexander. In their present situation, though, it was different; neither would want that to take place. “Sarah, I believe we are likeminded on this issue, so that will never be a concern. In fact, I wish more than anything that we could remain as we are, but as you say, it isn’t proper. If you are to remain, we must wed.”
“Very well, Daniel. If you’re sure this is what Joanna wanted, and you sincerely desire it, then I shall pray about it. If God leads me to consent to your proposal, then I surely will. By week’s end, I shall have an answer. If, however, I believe it is not what God has in mind for me to do, then I shall be leaving soon after.”
Daniel nodded to acknowledge her decision to pray about his offer of marriage. Even though he had not wanted to ask this of Sarah, he himself had taken the matter to the Lord. Until he had been pushed into a decision, with Sarah planning to leave, he had avoided what he believed to be the answer to his prayer; this was God’s plan.
Before Sarah returned to her room, Daniel asked if he could pray with her over the matter. When they had finished, they each went to their separate bedchambers.
Chapter 6
The following morning, Mr. Hoyt sensed that something had happened between his son-in-law and Sarah. He wondered if Daniel had asked her to marry him, as his daughter had urged. After making his way over to the table, Mr. Hoyt sat down with Daniel and his grandsons. Sarah soon approached with a loaf of bread in one hand and a trencher loaded with sliced fruit in the other.
When Sarah was seated, she bowed her head as Daniel thanked God for providing for them. Hearing his voice reminded her of his question the night before. When she had returned to her bed following their conversation, still unable to sleep, she had spent some time in prayer. She had promised Daniel an answer by the end of the week. As she glanced at Dan and Joseph, her heart melted. She dearly loved them both. With their mother gone she wondered how she could ever leave them.
Daniel watched as Sarah looked lovingly at the boys. He smiled, for he could see that her countenance clearly demonstrated that she would say yes to his proposal. Her love for the boys was so great, he was fairly certain she could never leave them. He then thought about Joanna and his smile faded. Even if Sarah remained, nothing would ever be the same for his family. His darling wife was gone forever.
Mr. Hoyt had also been observing the two adults at the table. He beamed at Sarah’s tender expression when she looked at his grandsons. If her tender gaze offered any indication of how she would answer his son-in-law, if he had indeed mustered up the courage to ask, she would be staying on with Daniel and the boys.
Just as Daniel had a moment ago, the older man felt a wave of sorrow at the thought of his daughter and that on this side of eternity he would never see her again. Remembering his age, he reassured himself that this side of eternity, for him, was not so very long; he would be seeing her again soon. And knowing Joanna would be pleased to know Sarah would be looking after her sons served to ease his sadness.
Once the boys had finished eating, they went out to the barn to begin their chores. Without his grandsons present, Mr. Hoyt decided to broach the subject of whether Daniel had asked Sarah to marry him. “You two appear to have had a conversation; one about marriage, I take it.”
With surprise, Daniel’s head turned toward Joseph, and he blurted out, “How did you know?”
Smiling, the older man responded, “You would not know it to look at me, but I am rather intuitive.” He was delighted when his son-in-law and the young woman chuckled at this, for he sensed they had been far too somber about the whole business. “Truth be told, in looking at the two of you, I knew something had happened. Is it settled, then?”
As she thought over the fact that the question had come from Mr. Hoyt, Sarah felt ill and soon excused herself from the room. This was Joanna’s father asking whether she intended to marry Daniel. In her eyes, Daniel was still Joanna’s husband, and always would be.
With Sarah gone from the room, Daniel explained that he had asked, but that she had not yet give
n an answer. “She requested that I allow her time to pray about it, which is as it should be. She said she shall inform me of her decision by the week’s end.”
“If I may inquire, what prompted you to ask at this time? I wasn’t even sure you had settled upon the idea.”
“It was as you had said. I found her up during the night. When I came upon her in the kitchen she had been crying. She explained that it was not proper for her to stay here any longer. She even reminded me that this would be her last visit. Knowing you and Joanna were right about the situation—the boys needing a mother, and Sarah lacking a family—I decided I had better ask while there was yet time. Initially, she reacted as though it would be a betrayal of Joanna if she were to accept—that is, until I informed her that it was Joanna’s wish.”
“She must have been surprised both by the question and then to learn that Joanna had wanted the two of you to marry.”
“She was indeed. As I had indicated, her first response was a definite no, which was exactly what I had expected. I am of the opinion, however, that just knowing Joanna wanted it this way made her willing to at least consider my proposal. Even as we speak about this, I still cannot fully accept that Joanna is truly gone. Though it may be the right thing to do, proposing to Sarah still feels wrong somehow.”
“I understand, Daniel, but this needed to be dealt with while Sarah is still here. Joanna showed real wisdom in making the suggestion that Sarah become a part of our family. Let us pray that our young friend accepts your proposal.”
◊◊◊
As Sarah reclined on her bed, she felt uneasy about her future, a future that might include Joanna’s family. Was she really prepared to marry Daniel? She had no fears where he was concerned, but she wondered if it was truly the right thing to do.
Taking the matter to the Lord, Sarah began, “Not that I ever intend to marry again, but what if, in time, I wish to be wed? If I consent to Daniel’s proposal, I shall never have an opportunity for a real marriage with someone else. Daniel will love me as one loves a sister; therefore, ours will never be a traditional marriage. Neither of us would want it to be. But when I look at Joseph and Dan, I know I can make the sacrifice. In fact, I am quite certain it would be more of a blessing. What would you have me do, Lord?”
For the remainder of the week, Daniel did not mention the topic of marriage again to Sarah. He had no wish to pressure her. Furthermore, he required time as well to adjust to the idea. He was grateful the whole thing felt like a business proposal; otherwise, he could not have conceived of going through with it. On the final day, the day she had said she would have an answer, he decided to approach Sarah. When they had a moment alone, he sat her down and inquired, “Sarah, have you come to a decision?”
Still a bit stunned that he had even asked, she dropped her eyes to her lap. “Daniel, after praying about this I have a peace about it. I do believe that, for the boys’ sake I can do this.”
Daniel noticed by Sarah’s demeanor she was now uncomfortable in his presence. She had accepted for the boys and the boys alone. He was relieved at that thought, but also uneasy about how she was reacting to him now that they would soon be married. He never intended to lose her friendship. He decided to address the issue. “Sarah, clearly you are uncomfortable around me now. You needn’t be. There is absolutely no reason for things to change between us. We are still friends, are we not?”
Sarah understood that what he had said was true. Nothing would have to change between them. “I apologize, Daniel. I guess I am a little dumbfounded by all that has happened. Yes, we are still friends.”
Smiling, he took hold of her hand. “We best speak to the boys.” He felt that the sooner they had this marriage transaction behind them, the sooner they could get back to the way things had always been between them. What is more, he still needed time to accept that Joanna and the baby were truly gone. With his boys’ future on his mind, he had been unable to allow himself to grieve properly.
Sarah suddenly felt a flutter in her stomach. “What if they do not understand why we are doing this and are angry with me?”
Hearing the fear in her tone, Daniel assured her. “Sarah, you shall see; the boys will be happy about this. They love you very much.”
While making their way out to the barn, Daniel kept hold of Sarah’s trembling hand. Though he had told her that the boys would be happy about their decision, he was not completely certain of that. As they entered the barn, the boys caught sight of them and hastily made their way over. With his sons approaching, Daniel quickly let go of Sarah’s hand.
Wondering why Sarah and his father had come to the barn, Joseph inquired, “What is it, Father?”
Daniel noticed that Sarah was fidgeting and thought perhaps he should have kept hold of her. He had intended to tell the boys to come straight in doors when they were through so he might speak with them, but he could not put Sarah through the torture of prolonging the whole affair. “Boys, take a seat over there on the bench. We have something we wish to tell you.”
Once he and his brother were seated, with Sarah and their father standing directly in front of them, Dan bravely stated, “We are prepared to hear whatever it is you have to say to us, Father. By the look on your face, we seem to have done something to anger you.”
A little apprehensive, Daniel glanced down at his sons and replied, “No, Dan, you are not in any trouble. Sarah and I merely have something we wish to tell you. As you know, I shall be going out on calls, as always. Besides you boys, there is the house and the garden to manage.” Not exactly certain how to begin, he babbled for a few more minutes.
Dan spoke up. “Father, you are not making any sense. What exactly are you trying to tell us?”
Daniel decided to speak plainly so there would be no misunderstanding. “Boys, it isn’t proper for Sarah to remain here any longer with a house full of men.” He had no desire to mention the loss of their mother.
Joseph, with tears in his eyes, blurted out, “No, Father! Sarah must stay here with us! You cannot let her leave. We need her!” Dan also had tears in his eyes.
Daniel hated to see the pain on his sons’ faces, but he was delighted they wanted Sarah to stay. Knowing this made what he had to say all the easier. “Boys, Sarah can only stay if she and I were to marry. For it to be proper, there is no other way.”
All at once, both boys cried out in unison, “Then marry her!” Having lost their dear mother, neither one wanted to give up Sarah. She was the next best thing.
Delighted at their reaction, Daniel and Sarah glanced at each other. They had worried for nothing. The boys jumped up then and took hold of Sarah, each asking her to stay and marry their father.
“Boys, Sarah has already consented to be my wife.”
Pleased, the young men both hugged Sarah. Sarah hugged them right back. Their response had confirmed for her that she had made the right decision. “Your father and I shall remain as we are—purely friends. We are only marrying that I might stay on here with all of you. I shall never try and take the place of—”
Seeing tears in Sarah’s eyes, Dan broke in, “Sarah, we know you loved our mother and that you are only marrying Father because of what those women at the church said about you. This is the only way for you to stay.”
Stunned that the boys had heard and, what is more, had understood what the women had implied with their comments, Daniel looked at Sarah. They were both equally surprised the boys had comprehended theirs was going to be solely a marriage of convenience.
Chapter 7
The following week, Sarah and Daniel, after meeting with their pastor, were in front of the magistrate. They had received a special license from the very man who would be presiding over the ceremony; therefore, they could forgo the three weeks of the posting of the banns.
Daniel’s sons and father-in-law were the only people in attendance. Even though everyone was delighted that Sarah would be staying on, this was a rather solemn day, in particular for Sarah and Daniel, for their marriage
was another reminder that Joanna and Alexander were gone, never to return.
Amidst his sadness, just as Sarah’s father and father-in-law had done during her marriage to Alexander, Mr. Hoyt prayed that one day Daniel and Sarah would come to love each other. Although it hadn’t been that long since his daughter had passed, he understood that a marriage devoid of love would be a very lonely place, especially once Dan and Joseph were grown. The boys had no such concerns. For them, this day simply meant that Sarah could stay.
When the ceremony had ended, everyone piled onto the wagon for the ride home. As they rode along, Sarah came to the realization that she was now Sarah Thompson. A little sad to be losing the name of the man she had dearly loved, she turned her head away from the other occupants in the wagon. While attempting to rein in her emotions, she prayed that God would help her to put all thoughts of Alexander behind her so she could forge ahead with her new family.
Daniel also felt sorrow at the knowledge that his marriage today had somehow put a barrier between him and his past—a past that included Joanna. As he glanced at Sarah, he detected a strained expression upon her face and surmised that she was feeling much the same as he.
◊◊◊
Upon the family’s arrival at home, the boys hastily climbed down from the wagon and made for the barn, where they found Zechariah—a farm hand that helped on occasion. He had already done most of the chores, leaving the boys only a few things to finish up. Dan and Joseph worked as fast as they could, for they wanted time with Sarah before the day ended. As they were missing their mother terribly, Sarah was a timely and much-loved alternative.
Sarah Anne's Faithful Friends (Unshakable Faith Book 4) Page 3
