Hailey peeked over the rim of her martini glass for an instant. She felt a pulse of recognition, seeing the man who so recently bumped her then politely apologized.
He made eye contact with Hailey. A zing of pleasure raced through her. She quickly fought it down.
For reasons she couldn’t quite understand, she kept looking back toward the bar. Not staring, just glancing at the man. Several times she felt his eyes meet hers, losing herself in memory of the blue ocean of his gaze. She held the contact for a spilt-second before looking away.
“Oh, Shit!” she gasped, hiding her eyes behind the glass once again. “Here he comes.”
“Just be yourself.” Jenna said.
“That didn’t work so well with David.”
“David was an immature jack-ass,” Jenna commented sharply. “He was never good enough for you.”
Mandy leaned closer to Hailey’s ear. “I know you’re gun-shy. Believe me, I get that,” she continued, looking into Hailey’s eyes. “But you also have to start living again. It’s been almost a year.”
The three surreptitiously watched his movements as he conferred with two men also leaning at the bar and all three men began to work their way toward them.
Jenna covertly threw Mandy a directed nod, signaling that she should move to leave an empty seat next to Hailey.
Hailey listened as Jenna and Mandy divided up the two additional men among themselves.
On pins and needles, Hailey waited, eyes never leaving the three men as they crossed the dance floor and made their way through the swaying, raucous crowd.
Her heart raced as the handsome blond man stood before her once again. “Hello, ladies. I’m Brian,” he motioned to his friends. “This is Chris and this is Brad,” he continued on. “May we buy you a round?”
Ever the social butterfly, Jenna piped up, “Sure. Grab a chair.”
Brad and Chris dragged chairs from the adjoining tables and sat, while Brian moved toward the only original chair left. Hailey’s breath caught in her throat as she realized that Mandy had moved, leaving the only unoccupied chair at the table directly next to hers. Her heart beat faster as Brian sat down, now only inches away.
Jenna took over the conversation, holding out her hand to Brian. “I’m Jenna, this is Hailey and Mandy.”
Working on her second drink, Hailey participated in the light conversation, made a little more difficult by the music’s volume. Chatting back and forth, the six soaked up the atmosphere and let the rock music abuse their ears.
Brian turned to Hailey, a hopeful smile on his face. “Would you like to dance?”
He reached over and placed his hand on hers, sending a small quiver of unexpected pleasure through her body. The feeling was short-lived as the icicle-like tendrils of fear the monsters bred returned to torment her. She grimaced as the apprehension crushed any hope the transient tingle brought.
Her palm growing clammy against his warm skin, she moved her hand from under his and placed it in her lap.
Mandy caught a quick glimpse of the defensive gesture and gently nudged Hailey’s arm, the message clear. It’s okay to have fun. I won’t leave you alone. You’re safe.
“Let’s all go dance!” Jenna said, standing and downing the last of her drink. She led the pack toward the wildly gyrating crowd trashing around on the polished wood in front of the stage, her new playmate in tow.
Hailey tried to control the spikes of adrenaline as they all stepped onto the dance floor, Brian again reaching for her hand. He guided her through a series of complicated spin moves before the up-tempo rock number ended, followed by a leisurely, slow-moving ballad.
She stepped into his arms, the motion tentative. The pair began gently swaying together to the unhurried beat of the song. As the music surrounded them, he took his hand from her hip, sliding it around her waist and drawing her closer. She felt the alarm bells begin ringing in her mind. The motion was innocent enough, but still she inwardly flinched at the new sensation of his relocated touch.
She felt her body go stiff in his arms, all sense of pleasure gone, the flash and flush of that first contact vanishing like a puff of smoke.
He felt it too. He looked into her eyes, noting her conflicted, deer-in-the-headlights expression. “Are you alright?”
“I’m sorry. I can’t do this, I have to go.” she said, quickly separating from him.
She saw his face change, now a canvas of surprise and confusion.
“Do what?” he said. “I just wanted to dance. That’s all.”
A wave of building panic spreading across her feminine features, her growing discomfort was now evident to both Brian and her friends.
“I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said, holding up his hands in surrender and attempting to use humor to defuse the situation. “I’m really harmless. I promise.”
Her face blushed to a bright crimson. “It’s not you…really…its okay. I…I…I just have to be at work early,” she said, stammering through the lie. “Thanks for the drink.”
“I thought you quit your job?” Jenna said, leaving the arms of her new friend and moving back to stand next to Hailey.
“No,” Hailey continued, now forced to use one lie to cover the other. “I just thought about it.”
She turned toward her friends, pleading look now hidden from Brian.
“Come on guys. Please, let’s just go,” her expression now turning to one of growing apprehension. “We agreed to leave together.”
Jenna frowned disagreeably. “Okay, okay, whatever!”
The three friends left the dance floor, and the men, walking quickly to the exit.
Once outside, they walked in stilted silence down the alley toward the garage.
“What the hell was that all about?” Jenna asked, sharp voice echoing off the concrete walls of the garage.
“I’m sorry. I just had to get out of there.”
“But you said you were having fun, what happened?”
“I don’t know, I just felt…trapped.”
“Trapped by that cute guy?” Jenna observed. “We should all be trapped in the arms of a hunk like that.”
Hailey sulked as Jenna drove back to her place, the silence in the car suffocating.
“I’m sorry I ruined you guys’ night,” she said. “I just couldn’t breathe.”
“I’m really worried about you, girl,” Jenna said. “All he did was put his arms around you and you freaked.”
“You just don’t understand,” she said, voice taking on a defeated timbre. “I don’t expect you to.”
Pulling into the parking lot at Hailey’s apartment, Jenna shut off the car.
“Are you okay? You want us to come up?” Jenna asked in concern.
“No. I’ll be alright.”
“Let’s just call it a night,” Mandy said, turning to Jenna. “I’ll walk Hailey up. Be right back.”
Crossing the lot, the pair now reached the stairs. Hailey stopped. Tears welling up in her eyes, she turned to Mandy.
“I really am sorry. I just can’t help it. I wanted to dance with him, I really did, but when he held me…I…I,” she stammered. “Jenn must think I’m deranged.”
Mandy reached out, putting her hand on Hailey’s shoulder. “I know we let you down the night you were raped. I never should have let you leave. I’ll never forgive myself for letting Jenn talk me into going off with her that night. I’m so sorry.”
“I know you didn’t mean for me to get hurt,” Hailey said. “I just couldn’t handle being in his arms. I thought I could, but I wasn’t ready. Jenn must think I’m such a loser.”
“She just doesn’t get it. I’ll talk to her.” Mandy said.
She hugged her friend. “I’m so glad you understand.”
Mandy smiled at her. “Call me in the morning?”
Hailey nodded. “I will.”
She watched Mandy get in the car and the two girls drive away. She turned back and stalked up the stairs, emotional tail between her legs. Unlocking the do
or to her apartment, she cursed herself for her own lack of spine.
A cute guy puts his arms around you to dance and you come unglued! Could you be any more pathetic?
She opened the door. Oh, who cares anyway! She triple locked the door behind her, furious with herself for once again letting her fears overwhelm her.
Loath to admit it, even to herself, she did care. She cared very much. She stomped across the apartment, opening the bedroom door with a bang, the sharp sound echoing off the walls.
She watched her reflection in the mirror and cursed the woman looking back at her.
What was I thinking, wearing this! She scolded with unwarranted zeal. Of course he hit on me! I look like a French whore.
She pulled at the straps on the dress. Stepping out of it, she balled up the delicate creation and threw it, watching as it sailed across the room to land crumpled in the corner.
I should have known better than to let Jenn talk me into going out tonight.
She rummaged through her dresser and pulled out a worn and baggy nightshirt, tugging it over her head.
Standing before the bathroom sink brushing her teeth, she glared at her reflection, running through the encounter with Brian and what she could have done differently. She chastised the woman looking back at her again. I’m such a loser!
Now completely dejected, she threw herself into bed, the tears flowing freely down her cheeks to wet her pillow. She wanted so much to be “normal”. She knew some guys were nice and she desperately wanted to be able to enjoy a man’s company. She thought, without being scared shitless!
Sitting up, she wiped the tears from her eyes. She briefly remembered the tingle in her body when Brian first touched her hand, when he first held her close. Before I lost my freakin’ mind!
She berated herself again for being such a coward. Why can’t I just move on, like mother said?
She could hear her mother’s words ringing in her ears. You have to try to forget about what happened and get on with your life. No good can come from dwelling on this.
Nerves still screaming at her, she stalked to the kitchen for some water, jamming the glass against the fridge dispenser with unnecessary force. Sitting down on the couch, she sipped the drink and thought in silence. She considered what “Hailey the Biker” would have done in that situation.
She wouldn’t have been so afraid. She thought. She would have danced with him, maybe even kissed him. She wouldn’t have been too scared to enjoy herself.
She wanted to control her fear, but couldn’t. She looked inside herself and knew that the biker Hailey wasn’t afraid of anything. She desperately wanted to be able to summon that courage any time, not just when she was riding.
No bike, no boots…and no confidence…just great.
Chapter Eighteen
Shattering the room’s silence, Smith’s phone rang, the noise penetrating the fog in his brain. He jerked from his deep sleep, ears filled with the concussions of last night’s alcohol binge.
Pulling himself out of bed, he answered the call. Sitting in a leather-covered period armchair under the room’s only window, Smith brought the Chief up to speed, the antique phone heavy in his hand.
Fighting a monumental hangover, he spoke as the pounding in his head continued to torture him. Serves me right. He grimaced.
“We’re digging into Stone’s background now.” he said.
“What do you have linking Grady to Stone?” Matarski asked.
“Not much really, other than the playing cards. I’m waiting for the ballistics report on the casing we found at the Grady scene. YCSO pulled two sets of prints from a whiskey flask found at the park. One set belongs to Stone, the other is still unidentified. It’s just a couple of smudges. I don’t know if we’ll be able to get anything from it. I’m also waiting on a DNA profile from some lipstick found on the flask.”
“Any other connections?” Matarski asked
“None so far. The victims don’t travel in the same circles, but we are still looking for commonalities,” he said. “My gut tells me this is the work of one woman with a serious axe to grind. She’s leaving the cards as a signature. There must be something in the background of both men that connects them to this mystery woman, and it can’t be good.”
“I don’t think these cases are linked. The victims don’t seem like they would know each other. They live hundreds of miles apart and they travel in different social circles. Grady’s an upstanding college athlete and you said this other man’s is just a punk.”
“They don’t have many indicators. That’s true.” Smith admitted.
“Can you trace the cards?”
“We ran it through the database and they are a common brand, available in any corner drug store,” Smith said. “No help there.”
“So, basically, all you really have is your gut feeling and a couple of playing cards that could have come from anywhere,” Matarski questioned harshly. “I can’t tell Senator Grady that his son was associating with known criminals, not to mention telling the press that we have a serial killer in our city, based on your gut. They would crucify me.”
Smith’s pulse jumped a notch, causing the vein in his forehead to pulse in frustration. You ignorant ass! He thought caustically. There’s a serial killer out there and you’re more worried about how you look in the press.
He pulled tight on the reigns of his frustration, barely keeping his temper under control.
“I know these cases are related Chief, we just don’t have irrefutable proof yet, but too many things point that way.”
Matarski cleared his throat loudly. “Make a solid connection between the two cases, or leave Stone to the Yavapai County Sheriff,” he said. “I want you back here today.”
“That’s not enough time. Come on, Chief. I know there’s something more going on here, something we’re missing.”
“It’s all the time you have.”
“Chief, give me 48 hours. It’s Saturday, just give me the weekend, please. If I can’t build a solid connection, I’m back in the office by Monday morning.”
“No whining?” the Chief asked.
“No whining.” Smith reassured his boss. He silently hoped he would be able to make good on his promise.
“Okay, you have 48 hours. Not a minute more.”
“Thank you.” He said.
“Just remember, if you do find anything, you inform me immediately. I’ll decide what’s relevant and what’s not.”
Smith fought the urge to rail at his boss as his stomach knotted painfully, trying to expel the acid his drinking left behind
“Smith, did you hear me?”
“Understood, Chief.” Forcing the grossly subservient response past his lips almost choked him.
“Good. See you on Monday.”
Click! The phone went dead in his hand.
Stepping into a superheated shower, he went back over his conversation with Cassie…and his losing battle of ethics with the Chief, in his mind, again feeling the flare of pain and outrage attached to each.
Sitting in a hotel room in a strange town, Smith could feel his career slipping away, ground to dust under the wheels of Matarski’s relentless ambition and criminal stupidity. Nineteen years…and this is how it ends.
He briefly reconsidered the options for a life after police work. He dressed and shelved the thought that kept nagging him like an old woman. Why am I still doing this? Why am I letting Matarski run over me like this? He couldn’t come up with a satisfactory answer. Maybe it’s time to retire…when this case is closed. That’s it! Just tell Matarski to fuck off. Then maybe I can put my personal life back together…or at least try.
Chapter Nineteen
As she made her way to the coffee house, Hailey replayed the disaster of last night in her head as the Hog roared in her ears.
I can’t believe I freaked out like that. To jump up and run out, that was just pathetic. Positive she had alienated her best friends…and embarrassed herself, she decided she needed to get o
ut of the house and get some air.
I’m sure Jenn and Mandy are pissed at me, and that Brian guy, he must think I’m completely insane.
She decided to call her friends later and apologize profusely, throwing herself on their mercy. It would serve me right if they never spoke to me again.
She rolled into the parking lot and saw a small group of bikes lined up in front of the building, sun glinting off the chrome. Hailey took in the riders, decked out in full club leathers, complete with patches and glittering regalia, they stood next to their machines sipping their drinks and talking. Parking at the end of the row, she overheard their spirited conversation as she walked, their voices carried on the warm breeze. She abandoned her own thoughts to innocently listen while she removed her glasses and gloves, stowing them in the pockets of her vest.
“I know he had the ass-whipping coming,” the first guy said, shaking his head. “But now he gets off scot-free and Billy’s looking at assault charges.”
“It sucks Doug,” the second man said turning to the first, his long, bushy beard swinging back and forth. “The cops should have done something sooner. That goat-roper was talking trash long before Billy popped him.”
“As if the cops were going to do anything,” the third man commented, nodding a massive, shaved head, the voice harsh and judgmental. “We’re bikers, they weren’t about to help one of us.”
“Come on now guys, don’t fall back on that ‘the police hate us’ bull. Billy screwed up,” the one they called Doug said. “A biker walks into a cowboy bar flying colors, what did he think was going to happen?”
His comment garnered murmurs of dissent from the other two.
“Yes, I know it sucks, but Billy shouldn’t have been there in the first place, and if he was going to go into a cowboy bar, he might have been a little less conspicuous.”
“Since when do we hide who we are?” The bearded guy said. “I’m not hiding my club patch because some wanna-be cowboy can’t hold his liquor.” He folded his arms across a massive barrel chest in defiance.
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