I remembered how it was here that Javier had almost kissed me the first time. It was Adalia and little Alvaro’s departure that had interrupted that fine moment. I knew the Venturas still missed Dante’s wife and her son, and they hoped that someday she’d come back for a visit. Just remembering little Alvaro’s single-toothed, drooling grin made me smile.
But nearly being kissed right up here? How close we’d come when his little brother and sister burst on the scene, breaking us apart? That made me grin.
“What are you thinking about?” Javier asked, nudging closer to me as the canyon way narrowed.
By the look on his face, I could guess what he was thinking about—our almost-kiss—and it made me blush to be caught with that intimate memory. “Well, fossils, of course,” I tossed out with a grin.
“Oh yes,” he said, with a wink. “Just as I was.”
We pulled up near where Javier and I had last time, and each dismounted. Then the kids scattered among the rocks, each crying out every time they saw something. Mateo found wormlike remains, and Frani found a creepy armored-tank sort of creature. She pointed it out as I came closer to get a better look, and I said, “Oooh, I think that’s called a trilobite.”
She and Javier looked at me in surprise and I shrugged. “Something I read,” I said, giving her the truth. But I couldn’t add in my biology textbook. Science had always been my favorite subject.
Over the next hour, Mateo found a seriously freaky sea spider, and Jacinto discovered clamshells, much like what Dante and Javier had brought home all those years ago. Everyone knew that Javier had promised to help find a pair of new fossils to replace the originals, so every time one of the kids found a pair of anything, they shouted out and made us come and look. But I didn’t think I wanted another clamshell. Since we were up here, I wanted something new—something that would help me remember this day forever. We found fish skeletons and what might have been an eel. More worms and clamshells.
But then little Jacinto came and shyly took my hand. I squeezed through a narrow opening in the rocks behind him, but Javier had to take a longer way around. There, behind the first wall of rocks, I knelt to duck under a shelf and see what he had found.
“Oh, Jacinto,” I breathed. “They’re perfect.”
“And we can each have one!” he said, his small hands drawing together in glee.
I considered him, smiling but thinking at first, No, this is something special, just for us. Me and Javier. Then, staring into his brown eyes, I thought, No, that’s part of what makes it perfect. Because as much as I wanted to remember Javier, if I decided to go back to my own time—and could—I wanted to remember this, too. This sense of being a part of a family. Of mattering to them, just as much as they mattered to me. I turned back to the wall, just as Javier caught up with us and bent to take a look.
“I think we found them,” I said, with a tender smile over my shoulder. “Six of them—one for each of us.”
“Six!” he said with surprise, eyes widening as he looked at the group.
And as I ducked again to look at the beautiful, detailed, spiraling “lamp shells,” thinking how perfect they were—an appropriate symbol for time travel—Javier took a deep breath. “Do we truly each need one?” he asked, with a whining tone and a twinkling eye.
The kids all fell upon him, insisting that they did, that they were beautiful, and it wasn’t fair that he and Dante had always had a matched set and yet they did not.
Javier grinned and lifted his hands, looking around at his siblings with pleasure and acquiescence in his eyes. “All right, all right! Mateo, fetch the chisels. Let’s see what we can do.”
He moved under the ledge, squatting beside me, and then leaned over and stole a brief kiss. And smiling into his eyes, I decided in that moment, I’d fallen just a little more in love with him.
JAVIER
We rode back down to the villa in high spirits, our mission complete.
It had taken a good hour to safely chisel out all six of the fossils—as well as a seventh that Francesca insisted we take to send to Adalia for Christmas—and then a couple of different fossils for Jacinto and Estie, for their new “fossil collections.” But the littlest of our group were chattering happily on the way back, rather than bickering, and I knew Mama would be grateful as she looked over our ancient treasures that night.
Coming home the back way, we brought our horses into the corral beside the stables, but Hector greeted me with a worried look, rather than his customary grin. “Doña Elena has need of you, Don Javier,” he said with deference. “She has been to the stables three times, inquiring about your return.”
“Did someone come? Earlier?” I asked, handing him my reins.
“A messenger,” he said, “with a package.” He didn’t know what it meant to us, this package, but obviously he’d picked up on the tension.
“A messenger?” Zara asked, her eyes meeting mine.
“Let’s go find out,” I said, taking her hand.
Together, we moved toward the house, Mateo right behind us. My stomach had been rumbling on the way home, though supper was a good hour away, but now I didn’t feel hungry at all. I could guess why Mama was upset and anxious for our return. Francesca hadn’t heard Hector, because she was back with Estie and Jacinto, helping them rewrap their fossils in cloths because they insisted they wanted to carry them separately.
I strode forward, biting the inside of my cheek. Maybe it was something else. Maybe the gambler had dropped off Zara’s things and information but not the lamp. I cursed myself for the hope that rose within me at that thought. I wanted the lamp back, didn’t I? So Zara would have her choice? Maybe even return to her own time, where she would be far safer?
Mama met us outside. “A messenger came,” she said, staring right at me. “Come to the library. Alone, with Zara.”
Mateo departed with a brief bow, realizing he had been dismissed. I knew well how it chafed, being the next-oldest, but not considered in times such as these…not in on everything. Beyond the closed doors, I heard Francesca and Mateo leading our younger siblings up the stairs to wash up and change for supper.
Zara took my outstretched hand, and we followed Mama into the library. She closed the doors behind us and then went over to my desk, gesturing toward it. “A package arrived for Zara,” she said.
Zara stepped up beside me and together we stared at it as if it was a living, breathing thing. “A package,” she breathed. “And here I thought he would come himself.”
I’d never thought he’d come or send anything at all, but I could tell it grated at her, that she wouldn’t have the chance to question him. I, too, would’ve liked the chance…
On my desk was a small wooden box. Tentatively, Zara moved toward it, rested her hand atop it a moment, then unlatched it and opened the lid. She methodically placed the contents on the desk. A letter in an envelope. The fossil, wrapped in a silk cloth that she unwound and laid beside the box. I forced myself to step up beside her. The lamp was nestled in the bottom, atop her grandmother’s neatly folded shawl.
Her eyes met mine, briefly, and she picked up the envelope and tore through the wax seal. Swallowing hard, she moved toward the window, ostensibly to get more light, but I could feel her need for a bit of privacy.
“My dear Señorita Ruiz,” she read, half to herself, half to us. “I cannot begin to thank you for the favor you bestowed on me in Monterey. As promised, I include the objects you required as payment—the shawl, fossil and the odd little lamp. In addition, I also promised to tell you more of who was behind the attack in Bonita Harbor.” Her voice trailed away as her eyes quickly scanned what was next. Did I imagine it, or had she paled, her breath quickened? Her hand went to her slender throat.
“Zara?” I asked. She started, as if she’d forgotten that we were there. She blushed furiously, looking from me to Mama and back again. “Zara,” I repeated, this time more softly, more encouraging than questioning. I stepped toward her, as did Mama.
> She bit her lip, then straightened her shoulders and lifted the letter. “He says that Captain Mendoza was paid handsomely by agents of the Union to attack Captain Craig and your storehouse.”
I frowned. “That makes no logical sense. Captain Craig is a Unionist!”
Her eyes were steady on mine. “This man claims that Craig was in on it. The goal was to sway you to their cause at any cost, knowing that your family is very influential in the region.”
“I knew it,” Mama said, half furious, half triumphant. “I never trusted that man! It was all part of a tremendous deception! Well, now we know the lengths to which those Unionists will go. They cannot try to win our support in an honorable way! No, they go about it in the most underhanded manner…”
While Mama seemed to immediately believe it, my mind struggled to make sense of it. Would they really go to such extremes to win my support of their goals? Perhaps the young gambler lied. Perhaps it was all a ruse to turn us against the Unionists!
Mama went on, chastising Captain Craig and his companions, but my mind was on all we had lost that day. The men. Four of the rancho’s men, all fighting to save us and what had been in the storehouse. I ran a hand down my mouth, keeping it there as I remembered two of Craig’s own men, floating facedown in the surf as I swam toward the men who’d captured Mateo. His own men? Had he been paid enough to lose good men, loyal to him and the Heron? To see them die? It wasn’t possible for a captain. Was it?
I looked to Zara, and she stepped forward and took my hand.
Mama was still pacing back and forth, ranting about the dirty games of the Americans and how glad she was that she was a proud citizen of Mexico. “I will never stoop to joining them!” she said. “I will die before—”
“Doña Elena,” Zara said, sharply interrupting her.
Mama was close, and Zara let the letter fall to the floor to take her hand, too. Holding both of us, she looked from me to Mama and back again. “I have to tell you something,” she whispered. “Something very important.”
My stomach sank. Because I could guess a few things she might say, and none of them were things I wanted to hear. Not now.
“You have every right to be furious about this,” she said. “You’ve suffered terribly because of their efforts to convince you that Mexico would not ride to your aid. But that is what happened, did it not? The soldiers of the garrison never came to your aid, never assisted Javier in coming after me and Mateo, or the pirates. Right?”
Neither Mama nor I, it seemed, could respond.
“Remember that as you consider what I am about to say.” She took a long, deep breath. “It’s 1840. In a few years, the first gold will be discovered in the north. In 1849, a great deal more will be discovered. But even before that, the Union will have requested that Alta California be the newest U.S. Territory.”
Mama let out a sound of disgust. “Let them request it. Mexico will deny their claim and defend us!”
Zara’s eyes shifted to her. “No. They will not,” she said quietly and assuredly. “Because in the meantime, Mexico will go to war with the States over Texas—and lose.”
CHAPTER 33
ZARA
As much as Javier had been considering joining the Unionist cause, as much as he hated the usury of the Mexican soldiers and the government they represented, I knew my words were like knives to his heart, after learning of Craig’s treachery. But still, I knew I needed to push on. I’d gone this far, hadn’t I? If I was going to change a little history, I wanted to make sure these people I loved came out on top because of it.
“It will be some time before they come this far, but mark my words. They are coming. And these massive ranchos will be divided, and divided again. You must get a surveyor here—a proper surveyor—to map your property.” I’d remembered that much from my California state history class. Streambeds and trees marked the borders of early ranches. The only Mexican settlers who succeeded in holding on to most of their land were those who had properly filed surveys and maps with the state. “You must befriend those who will rise to power, both Anglo and Mexican. You must do all you can to show them that you are on their side.”
“But we are not on their side,” Doña Elena said faintly, fingers hovering over her eyebrows, as if she were trying to get a grip. She knew I told the truth. She just didn’t want to believe it.
“You must be willing to go to their side,” I said. “Or your rancho will be lost. You and your husband, your children, you’ve all worked too hard for this place to lose it. You’ll likely have to give up portions of it, but I think if you play this right, you could hold on to a great deal.”
Now Javier was rubbing his forehead, as if trying to soothe away an ache. “Mama,” he warned, lifting a hand as she began to bluster at me again.
“Remember, Javier, I have seen it,” I said. “I have seen it. And now that you know what is to come, you have the power to make the most of it. What will you do with that power? Will you lead your friends? Will you not be able to watch with some satisfaction as the garrison is drained of its power and driven from what will become the newest state in America?”
He just stared at me blankly, as if trying to catch up with all I’d said. Maybe I’d said too much. “I’ll give you two some time to consider all I’ve shared.” I turned to Doña Elena. “I’m sorry that it isn’t the future you envision. But trust me, it will be good for California in time. And especially good for the people here who are anticipating what is to come.”
“What if we can use this knowledge to change history in Mexico’s favor?” Doña Elena said. “Warn them that they will lose this territory, if they are not careful.”
“How, Mama?” Javier asked. “By telling them that a girl from the future landed on our shore and told us?” He shook his head.
Doña Elena stared hard at me, arms crossed. “What if…what if Zara is misleading us?”
Javier gave her a sharp look. “Mama. What would she have to gain from doing so? You know I’ve had Unionist leanings, especially in this last year. We’ve discussed it. And this revelation about Mendoza’s attack—if it’s true, well, it hardly ingratiates me to the Americans, does it? It actually makes me wish I could stand against them! I cannot abide by such manipulation. And yet, if what Zara says is true, how can we do anything but move in their direction?”
She shook her head. “I don’t know. I don’t know.” Her mournful tone and the obvious wrenching of her heart made me forgive her even before she stepped toward me, brushing my shoulder with her hand. “I am sorry, Zara. This is all so much—”
“It-it’s all right,” I said.
I hated this. Hated that I was in the middle of so much trauma, frustration, fear. Hated that Doña Elena could doubt me and my intentions…even for a second. I felt like their whole world was crumbling and I was the cause.
Javier was picking up the letter from the floor and scanning it. Doña Elena dropped her gaze from me and moved to the window, to stare outside. I put my shawl, fossil and lamp into the box, closed the lid, and then quietly left the room. I just needed…out. And Javier and Doña Elena needed time to sort out their thoughts together.
I stood there a moment, my back against the library door. This tearing, this fear, this doubt—they weren’t the feelings I should be having when I was with family, were they?
No, I should be only feeling love, joy, acceptance. Trust.
Right?
Suddenly, I felt the urge to escape, fast. And yet also a deep calling to stay. I bit my lip, trying to figure out what I should do.
Run! Run, my mind said. Get out. Leave this place, this stress, this uncertainty.
The kids were still upstairs—I could hear Jacinto and Estie, once again alternating between laughing and bickering. But I didn’t want to see them or talk to them. I could hear Jalama humming in the kitchen and the back door slamming shut as people went in and out. I caught the scent of melting lard and smoke.
Run.
Heart pounding, wonde
ring if I really had the gumption to think about leaving, I ran upstairs, grabbed my new spiral fossil, carefully set it into the box, wrapped my shawl around my shoulders, and hurried back downstairs. I hovered in the foyer.
Stay.
The word rang through my heart like a gong, reverberating for several seconds. I stood there, wondering what I should do. Run…or stay? In some recess of my mind, I knew that this was it. That there was some opportunity, some window opening, through which I could really leave this time. That I’d discovered what I needed to, in full, and now it was up to me.
But did I want to go back, regardless of how uncomfortable it was right now? Did I really, really want to leave Javier?
Again, I heard the sounds of the kitchen—the chatter, the chopping, the clanging of pots. As if in a trance, I walked down the hall to the kitchen, wondering over the separate calls…to go and to stay. But for the next few minutes, I knew where I wanted to be—the kitchen.
I waited until Jalama saw me in the doorway. The round-faced, small-eyed cook grinned and clapped her hands, then lifted them outward. “Señorita!” she greeted me. “What may I do for you?” She shifted forward to grab a handful of oregano leaves, and began tearing them into a pile before her.
“I…I’d like to help. I need to think, and cooking…would help.”
“Ahh, yes,” she said, giving me a curt nod. “A good task is what you need.” After last time, when I’d just jumped in to help make dinner, the kitchen crew seemed to accept me, after they got over their astonishment at a lady wanting to do such a thing. But after years of helping my abuela in her tiny Mexican restaurant back home, it brought me comfort, and the routine of cutting, mashing, stirring, kneading…I honestly did think it would help me figure it out.
Whether to go. Or stay.
I set my box in the corner, folded my shawl atop it and then settled on a stool at the end of the huge wooden countertop. Jalama set five onions and a big knife before me, and wordlessly I set to chopping. I don’t know what it was, but the onions they grew on the rancho were mild, not setting my nose to running or eyes tearing. I popped a bit in my mouth, considered the smooth, slightly sweet flavor, and thought about how my abuela would have loved them, finding just the right dish for the aromatic veggie.
Four Winds (River of Time California, Book 2) Page 18
