by Moore, E. M.
“Think of the others,” he said.
I nodded, sobering in an instant.
“We’ve all decided to wait.”
I perked up at that, and lifted my chest off him. “You’ve all decided?” I asked, my voice coming out terse, accusing.
He nodded, looking perplexed now. “We thought it best.”
“Connor Ravana, I am going to say this once and then you can tell your brothers. I am my own person. You do not get to make decisions without me that affect all of us. Is that understood?”
I tried to push away from him, but he sat up and grabbed my wrist. “Why are you so upset?”
I tried to pull away, but he wouldn’t relent. “I am a partner in all this. In fact, I’m at the very center of all this, and I want you so badly I can’t stand it.” His eyes tuned molten as he listened intently. “It’s not fair that you four go off making decisions that impact me too. God, Connor, even now when I’m upset all I can think about is wrapping my arms around you and kissing you to make sure that you’re still real. That you still want me, and that I haven’t woken up from some glorious dream. What if something like that happens? What if tomorrow we wake up and there’s no more you, or there’s no more me?”
“That’s not going to happen.”
“How do you know? Some freaking crazy person tried to douse you with holy water today. What if…?”
Connor pulled me down, and then artfully maneuvered me onto my back. “What if that were you?” he asked, finally getting it. “I know you can’t get hurt by holy water, but we did almost lose you once. You have no idea what it was like when you were taken from us, Ariana. I get all this. I really do. I get the need to just lose yourself in what we have. Princess, I’m right there with you.”
His eyes clouded over with torture. He scanned down the length of my body before he pressed himself against me once more. My body lit up in the most tantalizing ways. His mouth found my neck as he nipped and kissed down to my shoulder. His fingers splayed out on my lower stomach right after he tugged my shirt up to my bra line. His thumb caressed the area just underneath the band of my jeans. I arched into him, and he slowly rolled his hips over mine. The motion took my breath away.
He kissed up to my ear. “Don’t doubt my feelings for you. Ever. If I could, I’d make you my Princess right now.”
His tongue lashed out, and my breath caught in my throat.
His sharp teeth had slid out. I could feel them as he kissed his way down my chest. “This is so stupid,” he mumbled between kisses. “I just can’t stop myself.” He pulled my tanktop down, revealing my bra. He groaned, grinding himself harder into me.
“Oh, Connor,” I rasped. Heat swamped me. I knew what was about to happen, and he hadn’t even touched me there yet. “Please,” I begged.
I was beyond caring, beyond worried about what could happen. It was just Connor and I, exploring our feelings for one another.
He lowered his head to kiss the swell of my breast. “Ohhh,” I moaned.
Every touch, every feeling that had been swarming in my head for weeks came to the surface. I was like a tea kettle waiting to cry out.
I couldn’t stop myself. I pushed back against his hips. “I’m sorry, Connor, but I’m going to…” My breath caught in my throat as the feelings rose inside me. I was pitching higher and higher and no matter that he’d stopped rolling his hips into me; I was on a runaway train with only one place to go.
He made a tortured noise in the back of his throat. “Yes, Princess. Yes. Don’t be sorry. Give in, Beautiful. You deserve this.”
He quickly undid the button on my jeans and pulled them down, just long enough to push against my nub.
There was a brief pause of absolute pleasure and then sparks exploded between us. “Yes,” I gasped, my insides clenching.
His forehead dropped to mine as my body tried to recover. My breath sawed in and out, the spot between my thighs still pulsed as I looked up to find Connor’s gaze on me. My mind tried to race forward to keep up with my body. Had we really just done that? His face held complete awe as he took in every moment after the aftermath. We had done that, and it was amazing. Overwhelming emotion flashed over him as he pulled my pants back up and buttoned them. Then, he pulled my shirt down all while my body trembled beneath him. “You are my everything, Princess.”
He lay on his side and pulled me closer to him. My thoughts were everywhere and nowhere all at the same time. He dropped a kiss on my temple and wound his arms around me. There it was. That feeling of completeness. Of being whole. It centered me. I rested against him and closed my eyes, reveling in our unity.
8
Dinner at the Ravanas started out bad and then got even worse. It didn’t help that my emotions were all over the place after what Connor and I shared, but I was pretty sure I still would’ve been insulted when Gregor looked at me as if I shouldn’t have been at the table in the first place. It was clear a guard had never eaten dinner with them before, and they probably weren’t supposed to. My anxiety kicked up several notches, and now my cheeks had a whole different reason to be red.
Gregor had walked in and stopped dead in his tracks. Christian made his way over to him then. I heard something like, “She did save Connor. The least we could do is offer her a spot at our table.”
I glanced at Connor who winked at me. Dead. Absolutely dead. My skin burned all the way from the soles of my feet to my hair roots.
Though Gregor didn’t say anything, he was stiff throughout the meal as if he didn’t know how to act in my presence. Thank God for Isabelle and the princes. Isabelle even made a toast to me. Red liquid sloshed in their glasses, a major contrast to the water I’d asked for. There was a strange metallic odor only camouflaged by the spiral ham being served.
There were a bunch of different reasons why the dinner should’ve been awkward, and it was, but it was also kind of nice once the guys started talking. Connor decided to give his father a play-by-play of the incident in the gas station including using the girliest of girly voices when he reenacted me asking them to leave when I first saw the sticker in the window. Then, he even got out of his seat to execute the hook kick I used to deflect the holy water away from us. He had all of us laughing by the time he was done. Even Gregor smirked.
“That’s our guard,” Nic said, elbowing me.
“Trainee,” Gregor corrected.
Nicolai rolled his eyes as Isabelle glared at her husband from the opposite end of the table. “Sweetie,” she said through clenched teeth.
Gregor’s pale face tinged pink at the peak of his cheekbones. He slid his glance to me and then back at his wife.
This only made her smile wider. “We’re indebted to Ariana.”
“I’ve already thanked the young woman, Isabelle.”
“It’s fine,” I said, speaking up before the argument continued. I could really care less. My relationship with the princes’ father was tenuous at best. I got the feeling he didn’t like me very much. “I am, after all, only a trainee.”
“See,” Gregor said, waving his hand at me. “It’s nice to hear someone so young who likes the use of proper terminology. I wasn’t trying to lessen any of her merits.”
Christian took a sip from his wine/blood goblet. “She may be the only trainee who’s ever had to face down an incident before graduation. There’s something to be said for that as well.”
I smiled at him in thanks, but he wasn’t looking at me. He just continued on with his dinner. It struck me then that he hadn’t said it for any reason other than that’s what he truly believed. He didn’t say it so I could thank him or that I could feel better about myself. It was truth to him.
“Indeed,” Isabelle said. “I believe you’re right, Christian. Then again, I’m not surprised. I knew my boys would make the best decision for them.”
I smiled at her. The love for her sons always seemed to be overflowing from her as if she couldn’t keep it contained. It was beautiful, yet made me sad at the same time. I misse
d that with my mother. I didn’t know what she thought about me or even if she could see me. I knew she loved me very much when she died, but I was young enough then that I didn’t really “know” her. Not as a person. I just knew her as my mom, someone who loved me no matter what and always would. She must have had a whole other side to her that I wasn’t aware of. Like Isabelle. She wasn’t just a mom. She was queen of the vampire world. She had duties and other cares and fears. I would only ever know my mom as a mother and for some reason that was sad to me.
Stephan wiped his mouth with a cloth napkin and then threw it on his plate. “When is The Council meeting, Father?”
“It’s scheduled for the day after next.” His gaze swept across the room, fixing on every one of us in turn. “Phillipe Checkov will be presiding over the meeting. He’ll be the one asking the questions. As you know, it was determined that I shouldn’t be the one to run the meeting like I usually do.”
Nicolai sat up straighter in his seat. “I can understand that reasoning, but Checkov? He’s such a—”
“Nicolai,” Gregor warned. Nic huffed back in his seat. Irritation was coming off him in waves. From what I’d witnessed, Nic may have been the most like their father in some respects. They were both very stubborn. Gregor softened his expression. “It’s true Phillipe is a…purist at times.”
“That’s an understatement,” Stephan mumbled to my left. A quick look at him told me he wasn’t too pleased about having this Checkov guy run the meeting either. I peeked at Christian and Connor. Christian had his pensive look, practically indiscernible since he always looked like he was deep in thought, and Connor was staring at me almost as if he wasn’t even paying attention to anything else.
“Whether he’s a purist or not doesn’t matter,” Gregor explained. “No one is in trouble for what happened. They just want to know the facts and hear it from those who were there.”
“Do you usually have meetings about every incident?” I asked.
Gregor’s perfectly sculpted eyebrows lowered over his eyes.
“I just mean to ask if we’re going to have to answer questions about the gas station incident as well.”
“No, that matter is being escalated. The guards here have received orders to start gathering evidence against the humans to see what can be done.”
Nic scoffed. “Escalated.”
He was still clearly upset, but I didn’t get why. Before I could think too much on it, Isabelle said, “Connor, why don’t you get some more of the…” Her eyes flicked to mine. “…get more drinks for us?”
I hid a smile behind my napkin. Isabelle Ravana was worried about what I’d think. That was interesting. I’d already come to terms with the fact that they drank blood. As long as they weren’t slaughtering humans to get it, I was fine with it. There was no need to hide it from me.
Connor walked through a door in the far side of the room and then came back out with a bottle in his hand that looked exactly like an expensive bottle of wine. He set it down next to her, and she reached out to touch his forearm in thanks. When she did, her eyes rounded, and she gasped. “You started to phase.”
All eyes turned toward Connor. Confusion swept over me, but then his gaze flicked to mine and my insides squeezed. He smiled, but it didn’t reach his ears. “Surprise?”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” Nic asked, his face practically the happiest I’d ever seen it as he picked his napkin up and threw it at him.
Connor easily dodged it and retreated back to his seat. His face was red, and he wouldn’t meet my eyes.
“When?” Stephan asked. He leaned forward on the table and grinned from ear-to-ear.
“Earlier,” Connor answered vaguely.
Gregor stood and walked toward his son. He clamped his hand down on his shoulder and squeezed. “Congratulations, Connor. I’m so proud of you.”
I looked around at everyone. Apparently this phasing bit was a big deal. “Excuse me?” I asked, almost sorry to interrupt their little celebration with a stupid question. “What do you mean Connor started to phase?”
Isabelle turned toward me, laughter in her eyes. “We apologize, Ariana. We’re being very rude.” She wiped her face with her napkin. “Phasing is a process all young vampires go through. It starts with being able to bring out our sharp teeth at will.”
Gregor still looked down at Connor as he said, “Since we no longer feed direct from humans for our blood, our fangs don’t protrude until we mature. Phasing usually brought on by an emotional event.” He beamed down. “Son, you should’ve said something earlier.”
Connor peeked at me and then up at his dad. “Sorry, there was just so much stuff going on.”
“Was it at the gas station then?” Stephan asked.
“Yeah,” Connor said. He took a drink from his glass and looked at me over the top of it.
Oh. Oh, God. Heat flared up my neck as I remembered the feel of Connor’s sharp teeth teasing my neck. ‘An emotional event’ his father had said. He didn’t start to phase because of the incident. He started to phase because he got to like second or third base with me.
I grabbed the water in front of me and downed it. I could feel eyes on me, but I didn’t dare look up from the table in case it was Isabelle. She was observant, and I didn’t want to give her any more clues as to the relationships I had with her sons. Especially since Connor and I had taken it farther than anyone else.
“That’s it,” Gregor announced happily. “I’m going to order us all up some ice cream. Susan!” he bellowed before walking off toward the room Connor had retrieved the blood from.
When he left, I dared to lift my eyes to Connor’s. The intensity in his gaze had me rearing back. Then, there was that cute little half smirk that always melted my heart.
He had some explaining to do. Especially when he hadn’t bothered to tell his girlfriend their time together made him hit some sort of freaky vampire maturity milestone she knew nothing about. Really though, I could be mad at him all I wanted, but remembering his sharp fangs tease my neck made me shiver.
Isabelle sighed, pride practically dripping from her words. “Rite of passage…”
Lord, kill me now. If not, the epic amount of embarrassment coursing through my veins was going to do the job.
9
After we all ate our ice cream sundaes courtesy of one of the biggest ice cream sundae bars I’d ever seen, I followed Connor out of the room. While the rest of them were preoccupied, I pulled him into a small alcove that had a window seat looking out at the front lawn. He raised his eyebrows. “Round two?” he asked.
I punched him in the shoulder lightly. “Why didn’t you tell me that happened?”
He shrugged. “It was a little embarrassing, I guess.”
“Even to me?” I asked earnestly. “I don’t know anything about it. You could’ve said something.”
“Don’t be upset,” Connor said, his eyes twinkling. “I just knew you would ask questions, and I didn’t want to have to say ‘Hey.’” He took a step closer and leaned down to whisper. His breath tickled my ear in all the right ways. Being secretive was something I had to get used to with all the super hearing around us, and this was something we definitely didn’t want Gregor or Isabelle to find out about. “Guess what? I was so turned on, I started phasing into vampire maturity.”
A shiver ran up my spine. He was too close to me right now not to have my body—and my mind—remember what we’d done only a few hours ago.
“It would be like having your balls drop in public.”
I turned my head to the side and laughed. Leave it to Connor to turn it into something funny. I loved that he could always make me laugh. He could soothe my soul in that way. “I get it,” I finally said. “I just started freaking out when I realized what happened. Do you think anyone else figured it out?”
He shook his head. “No, but only because we had the incident earlier. I could blame it on that. Christian might have an inkling. Notice how he didn’t say much. But, I don’
t think we should tell them.” He looked away and then the full force of his sea-blue eyes was on me. “I know you’re all of ours, Princess. I just don’t think we need to throw it in their faces. If situations were reversed, I— Well, I just wouldn’t want to know. In fact, what am I saying? They could’ve already been reversed and please, I just really don’t want to know.”
I nodded, completely understanding. I had the same kind of feelings for all the princes, but that didn’t mean they all needed to know every detail about what I did with each of them.
Connor sighed. “I wish I could touch you right now. That serious look on your face makes me want to help you forget everything.”
“I’m fine,” I said, smiling. Over his shoulder, I noticed the rest of the guys walking toward us without Gregor or Isabelle. “Hey,” I said, my voice a little too peppy for the scenario. I was always a horrible liar.
Nic stepped up to us and dropped an arm around my shoulder. “Mom and dad retired for the night.”
“We thought we’d show Ariana around the house,” Stephan chimed in. “She’s only seen the inside of her room and the dining room so far.”
“And the guard headquarters,” I added, still happy that I’d been included in that.
Christian started walking away and the rest of us followed. “How was that?” Nic asked.
I smiled thinking back on it. I’d felt like I belonged. Not in the way that I felt like I belonged with the princes, but in a way that a group of people all working toward the same goal felt. Like a camaraderie was being born. It was…refreshing. So many times at The Fort, I’d felt like an outsider, but here, I was just one of the ones charged with protecting the princes. “It was…pretty cool.”
“I bet they were impressed,” Stephan said. “I know I was.”
Giddiness swept over me. I’d finally done something right. I’d taken charge of the situation. I didn’t cower and wait for someone else to save me; I saved myself and the rest of them.
