Skye hugged the roses to her and finally let go, hope dying a slow painful death inside of her just as surely as the flowers were doomed to die.
CHAPTER THIRTY
Cian never knew how he got to his apartment. The drive home was a blur. The only thing clear to him was that it took all of his control not to turn back and beg Skye to reconsider her decision.
He knew that if he begged her to take him back, if he compromised his pride and she did take him back, he would hate her for it one day. So he kept his gaze fixed in front of him, not even allowing himself a backwards glance.
When Nick got home, Cian was sitting in the dark, nursing a beer, pondering over how life could suck so much. Just when you thought everything was going so well, life would come up and bite you in the ass.
He blinked at the lights, cursed. “Be a pal, Nick. Keep the lights off, will you?”
“Hey, what are you doing in the dark?”
“Thinking over how life can be such a heartless bitch.”
Nick sat down on the couch next to him, looking relaxed and carefree. Happy. “I’d say life’s surprising, astonishing but not a bitch. Why the gloomy outlook?”
“Why he asks?” Cian mused rhetorically, taking a sip of his beer.
Nick must have finally grasped all was not well in Cian-land. “What’s wrong?”
Pain slammed Cian as he uttered the words he wished fate would never have caused him to say. “Skye broke up with me.”
Thinking Cian wasn’t being serious, Nick gave a half-laugh. “What did you do this time?”
“I just loved her.”
Nick had never heard such a broken tone in his friend’s voice. “What happened?” he asked in disbelief.
“Looks like she had an epiphany today. Said how after watching Ash and Kiera, you and Thea with your troubles, she couldn’t take that kind of pain by falling in love. So she’d rather get out of our relationship now before we got in too deep.”
“What? But that’s ridiculous. You two are the most likely to have a lasting relationship than anyone I know.”
“How about that, uh? Tried explaining that to her, got nowhere.” Cian looked at the beer which had now gone warm. “Lasting, my ass.” He raised the bottle to his lips and took another sip anyway. It was something to do. Still nursing his one bottle, he had too much control to drown his misery in alcohol knowing it’d just result in a hangover. He’d gone through too many parties and hangovers to want to go through that phase again. Those days of partying were behind him. No matter the solace and oblivion a drunken state would provide, it would however, still be short-lived.
The pain would be there to claim him in its claws again.
“It’s so unlike her.” Had he been wrong about Skye’s feelings for Cian? Nick could have sworn she loved him too.
“Yeah, well, she’s pretty much made up her mind. She won’t budge from it.” She’d been unshakable. For the first time, Cian hadn’t been able to get through to her.
“Jesus, I’m so sorry. What are you going to do?”
“What can I do? She told me it was what she wanted. How can I fight against that?”
“By telling her you love her.”
“That’s the one thing she doesn’t want to hear from me,” Cian uttered in despair.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
“You didn’t have to come up with me or drop me off for that matter.” Kiera stood in front of Skye’s apartment and knocked on the door.
“And miss even one moment of your charming company? I think not,” Ash told her.
“Well, Mr. Daniels, your company’s not so bad either.”
“Is that so?” Ash dropped a playful kiss on her lips.
“Mmmm. You’re too good at distracting me.” She turned back to the door and knocked again. “Come on, Skye, I know you’re in there. Open up.” A thoughtful look came over her face. “That’s odd.”
“What is?” Ash asked.
“She usually opens the door at this point.”
“Maybe she forgot.”
“Maybe.” Kiera pulled out her phone and dialed Skye’s number. She could hear One Republic’s song “Good Life” playing through the door. It was Skye’s cell phone’s ringtone; which meant her phone was in the vicinity of the door. Usually Skye’s phone was almost always on her person. If she had it with her, it meant she was close to the door too. So why wasn’t she opening the door? She wasn’t answering her phone either.
The song stopped. Kiera tried her number again only to hear the song start up a second time. And still no Skye.
“Maybe she isn’t home, Kiera.”
“Something’s not right.” She dug into her bag for the duplicate key Skye had once given her to her apartment. Good thing she had it with her today.
“What are you doing?”
“Checking up on her.” Kiera fitted the key in the lock. But when she turned the key, it wouldn’t turn. Confused, she tried the knob. It rotated easily in her hand. Uh, oh. The door wasn’t locked.
She and Ash shared a look of concern.
“Something’s wrong. She never forgets to lock her door.” Kiera started to push the door open but he stopped her.
“Maybe you should wait out here while I check it out,” Ash proposed, taking hold of her arm.
Kiera tugged her arm back. “If you think you’ll go charging in there like a hero and leave me behind like I’m an airhead seventeenth-century heroine, think again. This is my best friend we’re talking about. If she’s in there, she could be in trouble.”
“It was worth a try,” he muttered. “And I wasn’t going to charge in there, more like creep in stealthily.” At her bland stare, Ash cleared his throat. “Right. Together then.”
He took her hand and pushed the door open. When they stepped inside, they found the apartment drenched in darkness.
Kiera felt along the wall for the light switch.
“What are you doing?” Ash whispered.
“Searching for the light switch,” she muttered back.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Can you see a thing? Coz I can’t,” Kiera hissed. “Or do you have a flashlight handy with you?”
“Good point,” he agreed and began searching for the switch as well.
Ash found it first and flicked on the lights. It took them a moment to recognize the crumpled figure a few steps away.
Kiera let out a cry of distress as she and Ash rushed forward and kneeled down beside Skye, who was sitting on the floor, her arms full of yellow roses, her hair covering her face. Kiera untangled her hands from the bags she’d been carrying and caught Skye’s shoulder.
“Skye?” Kiera shook her gently. “Oh my god, are you okay? Skye, honey, talk to me, please.”
Recognition flickered in Skye’s eyes. “Kiera?”
“Yes, it’s me, sweetie. Why are you sitting on the floor like this? Your door was unlocked. I was so worried that something bad had happened to you. Are you hurt?”
“Hurt?” Skye raised blank eyes towards her.
Kiera sent Ash a worried look. Skye looked devastated, her face ravaged with tears. “Hon, tell me what’s wrong.”
Pain crossed Skye’s features, then her face went blank again. “I broke up with Cian.”
“What?”
“Yes. I’m better at being alone so I had to break up with him.”
“And he believed that scoop of bullshit you fed him?” Kiera let out indignantly.
“It’s over.” Skye gave a humorless laugh.
“Oh honey.” Kiera couldn’t take it anymore, she wrapped her arms around her friend and rocked her, trying to offer what comfort she could.
At her concern, Skye’s emotional floodgates burst wide open. Tears overflowed her cheeks. Sobs racked her body as she held on to Kiera, trying to will her
self to stop crying like someone had died. She had thought the tears had finally stopped. Why couldn’t she stop crying?
Kiera and Ash looked at each other over Skye’s head. Ash gestured at the bags, that he was going to put them away and give them time alone. She nodded at him.
Kiera had never seen Skye like this. So heartbroken. So defeated.
“It’s going to be okay, sweetie,” she soothed.
Skye finally seemed to reign in her emotions. She took a shuddering breath. Her eyes fell on the crushed roses she held in her lap. Crushed like she was. “No, it’s not.”
“Oh, Skye.”
“I’m okay. I just need to…” She stopped as if at a loss what to do next.
“C’mon, let’s get you to your room.” Kiera helped her up. She reached out to take the flowers but Skye protested, tightening her fingers around them. Kiera felt a wave of sympathy brush her heart. “Alright. I’ll get you a vase to put them in.”
Kiera left her in her room and came looking for a vase. Ash was putting the takeaway food in the fridge. He straightened at the sight of her.
Ash took her in his arms. “How is she?”
Kiera laid her head on his shoulder. “Bad. I’ve never seen her like this before. I’m worried about her.”
“Maybe I should stay.”
“No, it’s best if you go.”
“You sure?”
Kiera nodded at him.
“Okay. I’ll talk to you tomorrow then.” He kissed her. “I love you.”
“I love you, too.”
“Take care of her, Kiera and call me if she needs anything.”
Warmth swept through her at his concern for Skye. Was it any wonder she loved him? Kiera hugged him tightly. “Thanks. I’ll take care of her.”
“Hey.”
Skye turned around at the sound of Kiera’s voice. She was curled up on the window seat, watching the world outside. She still hadn’t let go of the flowers.
“Hey. I—I’m sorry I bawled on you like that.”
“You were entitled to.” Kiera sat down on the window seat beside her, the blue vase in her hand. “May I?” She gestured at the flowers.
Skye hesitated, then sighed and gave her the flowers. “Sorry. I know I went all possessive nutcase on you over these.”
“Oh, Skye, give yourself a break. Cian gave them to you, didn’t he?” She arranged the flowers in the vase and put it on the nightstand, then came back to sit next to Skye.
“Yeah. He brought me yellow roses, such a happy color, so full of hope, and I destroyed whatever we had between us.” Skye rested her head back against the wall, weary to her bones.
“Why did you?” A perplexed Kiera asked.
“Why? Because I’m better off being alone than in a relationship with someone. I’m afraid of how badly it would hurt when he finally leaves me. So I broke it off first.”
“Excuse me, but that’s a load of crap.”
“It’s true.”
“No, it’s not. You love him, Skye. You’d never break up with him. Not over a stupid reason like that. Maybe he bought it and if he did, he’s a moron. But don’t insult our friendship by expecting me to believe that,” Kiera stated hotly.
Skye gave a teary laugh. “I could never bullshit you. Ever.”
“And don’t you dare even try. Skye, you know you can talk to me about anything. You know that.”
“I know. But I can’t talk about this.” When Kiera started to protest, Skye shook her head at her. “I can’t, Kiera, I really can’t.”
“Okay. Maybe you will talk to Tyler or Tasha.” She took out her phone but Skye closed her hand over hers.
“I can’t talk to them either. Please, Kiera, just let it go.”
“How can I when I see how much this hurts you?” The look of helplessness on her face was Skye’s undoing.
“I know. But I just can’t talk about it. I—” Skye knew she had to give her something at least. They cared about each other too much to keep secrets. “I gave my word.”
“Your word,” Kiera repeated slowly. “To whom?”
“I can’t say,” Skye said helplessly. “Please don’t ask me anything else about it.”
Kiera sighed. “I wish you’d let me help.”
“I know. But you’re helping me already by being here for me. And I love you so much for that.” She wiped at the single tear that slipped down her cheek. “But I just can’t deal with thinking about it, thinking about him.”
“Okay, we won’t talk about him—” The phone rang just then. “Who could that be? You want me to take it?”
“No, let the answering machine get it.”
There was a beep and then Thea’s voice grated out angrily. “Skye, I know you’re in there. Pick up the phone! Skye!” There was a moment of silence.
Kiera frowned. “What’s up with her?”
Skye gave her a confused look. “I don’t know. She should be over the moon. Her father let her and Nick get back together.”
“He did? That’s great for them.”
“Yeah.”
The phone rang again. There was another beep then Thea’s voice could be heard again. She sounded furious. “Skye, pick up the damn phone. I can’t believe you broke up with Cian. How could you do that to him? How could you? Is that how you repay the people who care about you? You’re just a cold, unfeeling bitch after all.”
Skye’s already pale face went white as a sheet. Fury flaring up inside her, Kiera grabbed the phone and spat into it, “You’re the bitch, Thea. You call yourself Skye’s friend? You’re no friend of hers! Don’t you ever call her names again or you’ll have me to deal with.” She slammed down the phone and blew out a breath. “Too bad old-fashioned phones are no longer used. Slamming the phone down would have been more satisfying if the person you’re slamming it on would get the full effect of it instead of hearing the dial tone.”
“Yeah, how about that, uh?” Skye said weakly. She looked devastated.
“Oh, hon.” Kiera wrapped her arm around Skye’s shoulders and held her tightly. “She had no right to say those things to you.”
“Cian’s one of her oldest friends. It’s understandable she’d react that way.” The irony of Thea’s reaction didn’t go unnoticed to Skye.
“She’s supposed to be your friend too.” Poor Skye. Life was always kicking her in the teeth. Losing her mom, the lonely childhood in the orphanage, then the crappy job. Getting the new job and meeting Cian seemed to have turned her life around, made it better. And now she had lost that as well. It just wasn’t fair.
Skye held on to her tightly, wishing, praying for solace. She wondered how something could hurt so badly. When did this pain stop? Did it ever stop?
She felt a crushing despair threatening to bury her alive. She had a feeling this pain would always be with her, no matter how much time passed.
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO
“It’s really coming down, isn’t it?” Tyler’s voice sounded from behind her.
Skye turned from her perch on the window seat to stare at Tasha and Tyler, who were standing at her bedroom doorway. It was the next day and it was raining again. It had all the makings of a thunderstorm. Skye could see the flashes of lightning and hear the rumble of thunder in the distance.
The gloomy weather suited her mood perfectly.
Still in her blue pajamas, she had a dark-blue blanket wrapped around her to keep the slight chill away. She’d woken up to the dreary day and mostly whiled away the morning staring at Mother Nature’s spectacle.
Last night Skye had gone to bed early, praying that sleep would provide her with at least a few hours of oblivion but not holding out much hope for it. Surprisingly enough, she’d fallen asleep. She must have been both emotionally and physically drained. Or maybe it had been the rain. The sound of falling rain had always soothed her
.
Kiera had stayed over and was around in the apartment somewhere.
“Can we come in?” Tyler’s eyes were filled with concern.
Skye nodded. Kiera must have called them. Tyler reached her in three long strides and wrapped his strong arms around her in comfort. She let herself rely on his strength for awhile.
“Hey kiddo, how are you doing?” he inquired softly as he pulled back.
“I’m okay.”
“That’s good.” Worry filled him when she lifted her lips mechanically in what passed for a smile. He took a seat on the bed.
Tasha sat down on the window seat, facing her. Skye watched her warily. Was this going to be like the Thea episode all over again? She knew that Tasha considered Cian a close friend.
As if reading her thoughts, Tasha said, “Kiera told me about Thea.”
“Oh.” Skye tightened her fingers around her blanket, bracing herself for more painful words. Kiera had erased the tape from the answering machine last night and unplugged the phone.
“Thea was completely out of line saying all those things to you,” Tasha pronounced angrily.
Skye blinked at her in astonishment. “Wh—what?”
“You know, it’s insulting that you’d think I’d react the same way. If you weren’t already so down, I’d box your ears for it.”
“Thanks… I think.”
“You should be,” Tasha retorted.
“But… why?” Skye asked, still baffled.
“Why I’m not ripping one into you over breaking up with Cian?”
Skye nodded cautiously, eyes still wary.
“Because I figure you have your reasons for doing it. Both of you are special to me and I know neither one of you would want me to choose sides over this. So I’ll just be here for you guys whatever either one of you need.” Tasha gave her a hug. “And Skye, no matter what, I’ll always be your friend.”
Skye’s eyes filled with tears at her words. “I don’t know what to say except that I’m so lucky to have a friend like you.”
Holding Out For Skye Page 28
