Dating Disaster with a Billionaire
By Elizabeth Lynx
Dating Disaster with a Billionaire
Copyright © 2020 by Elizabeth Lynx.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations em- bodied in critical articles or reviews.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, organizations, places, events and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
For information contact:
[email protected]
http://www.elizabeth-lynx.com
Book and Cover design by Elizabeth Lynx
Photography by Dphiman
Table of Contents
Table of Contents
ELIZABETH LYNX BOOKS
Dating Disaster with a Billionaire
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Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Epilogue
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ELIZABETH LYNX BOOKS
Pick and choose which funny, sexy Elizabeth Lynx book scratches your reading itch.
KINDLE UNLIMITED: Cabin Fever * Living Hell * Burning Love * Lost & Found Box Set * Dirty Secret * Dating Disaster with a Billionaire
ENEMIES-TO-LOVERS: Cabin Fever * Idol * Burning Love * Rules of Payne
SECOND CHANCE ROMANCE: Hot Dish * Living Hell * The Attraction File * Happy New You
SUPER WEALTHY/BILLIONAIRE ROMANCE: Dating Disaster with a Billionaire * Surprising the Billionaire with a Baby * Hot Dish * One Wild Ride * Royal Disgrace * Mogul
OFFICE ROMANCE: Surprsing the Billionaire with a Baby * The Attraction File * Mogul * Rules of Payne
SINGLE PARENT ROMANCE: Dirty Secret * The Spy Ring * Burning Love * Surprising the Billionaire with a Baby
MISTAKEN IDENTITY: Dating Disaster with a Billionaire * Surprising the Billionaire with a Baby * Idol * The Spy Ring * Royal Disgrace
ACCIDENTAL MARRIAGE/FAKE FIANCEE: The Spy Ring * Living Hell
CELEBRITY ROMANCE: Dating Disaster with a Billionaire * Idol * Star * Living Hell * Royal Disgrace
PLAYBOY: Mogul * The Attraction File
SMALL TOWN ROMANCE: Dating Disaster with a Billionaire * Surprising the Billionaire with a Baby * Idol * Star * Mogul * Cabin Fever * Living Hell * Burning Love * Hot Dish
BIG CITY ROMANCE: Royal Disgrace * Dirty Secret * Happy New You * Rules of Payne * The Attraction File * One Wild Ride * The Spy Ring
SERIES BOX SET: Cake Love * Price of Fame * Lost & Found
Dating Disaster with a Billionaire
WIN A DATE WITH A BILLIONAIRE!
Everyone wanted me to enter. The reason I shouldn't? I was a walking, talking, dating disaster.
My name's Marika. I ran a coffee shop in a small town. Things were fine until that fancy resort, The Blue Spot, that catered to the wealthy moved in down the road. They stole all my customers with their posh coffee shop open to the public.
How could I compete with the rich and powerful? Perhaps if I entered their Win a Date with a Billionaire contest, I could win enough money to help my business. I wouldn't tell them about my horrible dating history or especially about that one guy who ended up in the hospital. They didn't need to know that, did they?
As a VidTube star, most people had heard of me. I was Jokin' James. Everyone except the woman I was falling for, Marika. I had been coming by her coffee shop for almost a year, but she had no idea who I was or that my brother owned the resort that was stealing her customers.
We were friends, but I wanted more. I was all ready to ask her out when she entered the contest my brother was running. Not only that, but the resort wanted me to be a part of the contest. Now she would discover that my family owned The Blue Spot. And worst of all, that I wasn't from that small town at all. That I was a celebrity billionaire.
A sexy, funny, small-town billionaire romance involving mistaken identity, dating disasters, and a picnic so bad even the ants ran in fear.
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Chapter 1
MARIKA
“Isn’t it obvious?” I asked my best friend and only employee, Susannah, in vexation.
Her long, brunette curls fluttered around her shoulders as she shook her head.
“My vagina is cursed.” I stressed my point by waving my hands around my nether region like a game show model who graduated top of her class at game show presenting school.
Susannah tried to one-up me by rolling her eyes and flapping her lips with the release of a frustrated breath. Despite both of us being twenty-five years old, we enjoyed acting half our age when upset. What’s the point of arms if not to flap them around and look like a seagull on hallucinogenics?
“It’s not like it’s killed before, Marika.” Susannah grabbed the metal steamed milk pitcher and made her way to the sink before she stopped. Uncertainty thinned her lips as she placed the pitcher in the sink and turned. “It hasn’t killed before . . . has it?”
I blew out a relieved breath and responded, “No, thankfully, not yet. Though Doug ended up in the hospital. That wasn’t a good night. Face it, I’m a dating disaster.”
That was the night I realized I should not date.
Dating wasn’t fun. That was a fact. The awkwardness of first dates. The uncertainty of wondering if he’ll reach out for a second date after days of no response, despite promises of texting you later. And if the second date happened, was he one of those guys who skipped the meal and went straight for Movie ’n Chill? Or did he want more than an escape from his stressful life? Did he want more than a wham-bam-my-roommate-doesn’t-like-women-so-you-have-to-leave-at-two-in-the-morning?
All these things had happened to me, but they weren’t the reasons I fell out of love with dating.
It was what I did to the men when everything went well.
“That was one night. And his penis healed a few weeks later,” Susannah pointed out while she grabbed the cleaning rag and wiped down the faucets.
I sighed and gazed around my almost empty coffee shop. My parents’ pride and joy. They opened it the year I was born. Castle Ridge may not be a sizeable town, here in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia, but people were loyal and always in need of coffee.
But things had gone downhill this past year. There were only two customers, one of whom asked for a small tea, and the other bought the cheapest thing on the menu so he could sit at our table and eat his bagged lunch.
This was becoming our new normal. The lunch rush.
> If this kept up, it would force me to let Susannah go and cut back the café hours. Hard Grind, for the first time in twenty-five years, wouldn’t be open seven days a week.
“What about that guy who comes in every month? You seem to like him.”
Warmth bloomed up my neck, and I turned away from Susannah, pretending to be busy refilling the napkin dispenser.
James. I liked him, and I had a feeling he liked me too.
“He’s okay. But he doesn’t seem to take life seriously. He’s always talking about running away from here and building his own house, living off the land.” I snorted and turned back to face her.
James was hot. Super sexy. The looks of a model. And he must have worked out because he was certainly built. I had to admit, my heart did a little boogie when he showed up. He was usually only in town because he finished a job and then turned right around to leave for another one.
I didn’t blame him. If you got work, that was a magnificent thing. I knew many people who struggled and would love to be readily employed.
“Is he a farmer?”
I shook my head. I wasn’t sure what he did exactly. He never went into specifics.
“I think he’s a miner, but I’m not positive. I’ve known some miners, and they always have dirt under their nails. James has better nails than you.”
Susannah’s head went back in surprise. “These beauties? But I get them done every other week. No one has better nails than me.”
If there was one thing Susannah was known for, it would be her appearance. As the former Miss Castle Ridge and Miss Blue Ridge Dogwood, she spent a lot of time on her nails, hair, and whatever else was needed to maintain her appearance.
Some people thought the way she kept up her looks was superficial, but not me. She judged no one on how they looked and consistently found something about them to compliment. Susannah always had a saying about makeup or hair or beauty that fit any situation—like life being a box of chocolates, but with nails.
“I hate to say it, Susannah, but he’s got beautiful nails.”
One thing about men in these parts, they never had pretty nails. Not that I cared, but I found it unusual that he put so much effort into his appearance.
I watched Susannah process what I had told her about James. Her face contorted from shock to hurt to, finally, acceptance.
“I think it’s wonderful that he puts so much time into his nails. You know they say eyes are a window into your soul? Well, only strong, healthy, well-maintained nails can scratch the word ‘help’ on the window if that soul ain’t right.”
I never said her sayings made sense.
“Enough about dating and James. My biggest concern is the sale.” I waved my hand across the room, showing off my terribly maintained nails. “As you can see, it’s not going as I expected.”
Susannah nodded. “I thought for sure half-priced scones with any coffee would bring in a few more people. Did you post it online?”
I shook my head and bent under the counter to grab another bag of our house roast—not that we needed it. I hadn’t sold a single coffee today.
“Did you start that ISnapIt account like I told you to?” Susannah’s voice grew louder as she walked up behind me.
“It’s not me.” I didn’t move, just stayed in my crouched position, afraid to see the disappointment on her face.
“Ugh, Marika. It’s not difficult. How could you have spent most of your life in this century and be afraid of social media? It’s great. Especially VidTube. I admit, I only watch makeup tutorials on it, but there’s so much stuff on there. And ISnapIt is the perfect site to show off what you sell here. A pretty picture of coffee and baked goods. People will drool over that. Trust me, traffic will pick up once you develop a following.”
That was the problem. All those terms. VidTube. Following. ISnapIt. I understood the concept, but it sounded like marketing to me, and I hated that stuff. I didn’t want to push my coffee on people; I wanted them to come in here and enjoy the atmosphere. Discover this little gem for themselves.
That’s why I invested in a redesign last year once my dad turned the business over to me. I wanted to modernize the place.
I knew an inviting place to hang out or get some work done while drinking coffee was just what this town needed.
But then The Blue Spot opened several months ago, and everything changed. A redesign of Hard Grind was nothing compared to the fancy resort that had a café open to the public.
How could I compete with Italian marble, crystal chandeliers, and top-shelf coffee?
They were probably on ISnapIt.
“Stop blaming The Blue Spot,” Susannah said.
I hated the pity in her eyes every time we talked about this.
She could always tell what I was thinking. It was impossible for me to keep any secrets from her. I once sat in the high school library when we were seventeen thinking about Mark Grayson. She took one look at me and said, “Oh my God, Marika, why didn’t you tell me you had a crush on Mark?”
I rubbed my lips together before I murmured, “My father made a mistake trusting me with this place.”
“Nonsense.” A deep, scratchy voice came from the other side of the counter. I stood to discover my father leaning against his red walker with a scowl on his face.
“Dad, I told you I would pick you up to take you to your doctor’s appointment in an hour.”
His lips thinned as he conveniently ignored my response. “Look at this place; it’s gorgeous, just like my baby girl.”
“I haven’t been your baby girl in years.”
He smiled and gazed in my eyes for a moment. I knew he was thinking of Mom. Whenever he stared like that, his eyes grew misty, and he commented how much I looked like her.
“You remind me so much of—”
I waved him off. “I know. I know. I’m so much like Mom.” I glanced around the counter and found a napkin and wiped up nonexistent crumbs. Except, I wasn’t like my mom at all. She was wild. Rarely planned anything. And if poor planning and optimistic hope made people smart, then my mom was a genius.
I may not have been like my mom, but I looked a lot like her.
“I would say an ox. Stubborn.”
Susannah snorted from behind, and I looked back to find her covering her mouth.
“Hardy, har har. If I’m stubborn, then I got that from you.” I pointed at him and narrowed my eyes.
I loved my dad; he never sugar-coated anything. He was the definition of a cranky old man, shaking his fist and telling people to get off his lawn.
His crankiness grew from life. Supporting a family. Not having a child until he was fifty. Dealing with the deaths of the people he loved. Feeling helpless when help was needed most. I understood because I went through a lot of that with him.
“If I’m so stubborn like you, then why am I on ISnapIt?”
My eyes widened, and Susannah mumbled, “Way to go, Bob.”
Everyone called my dad Bob, except for me. He complained he was no mister, and he didn’t trust anyone who refused to use his first name.
“When? I thought you only played solitaire on the laptop?”
He held up his chin. “About a month ago. I post pictures of Bernard.”
“Our dog?”
We had a very large Saint Bernard, hence the name Bernard. My parents let me name him when we got him six years ago, and I thought I was so clever. I wasn’t. I was basic, so very basic.
“Oh yeah, people love him. My most popular posts are the ones when I put hats on him.”
“Bernard. You’re talking about our dog? He runs when I try to put a leash on him, yet he lets you put on hats and sits still for a picture?”
My father and our dog shared some secret language. Sometimes I walked into the living room, and my father would say, “Shh, she’s coming.” As if I knew crazy-man-dog speak.
“Yes. He’s a wonderful dog.” My dad snapped his fingers together and pointed at me. “Why don’t I bring Bernard here? We coul
d put on one of his hats and pretend like he’s drinking coffee out of a cup. That would be hilarious.”
“People would eat that up,” Susannah said.
Had my friend drunk some of my dad’s wake-up juice?
“You two can’t be serious? A dog pretending to drink coffee would be the last thing that would attract customers. Maybe the health department, but not customers.”
“All I’m saying is you talk about making this place modern, yet you aren’t using modern tools.”
My dad had a point.
I grumbled, “Fine. Tonight, when I get home, I’ll open an ISnapIt account.”
“No need, I’ve already done it for you.” Susannah shoved her phone in front of me. I glanced at a picture that took up the top third of the screen—a cup of coffee with some scattered coffee beans. Below it was Hard Grind’s name and location with some buttons I didn’t recognize. I pressed one and saw it was my dad, Susannah, and Bernard all making weird faces in front of the café.
“You two planned this from the beginning.” I looked up to their sly smiles. “I had no chance. How many other things have you two done behind my back?”
I noticed they looked to the floor as they both, rather rapidly, responded with, “Nothing.”
Chapter 2
JAMES
“What about this eggplant? I bet I could do an entire show about an eggplant,” I said with my best straight face.
It was the same expression I used while filming my prank show on VidTube called Joke’in James. I loved coming up with ridiculous ideas and watching someone’s reaction when they found out it was a joke.
Most people were good sports. They got it. But a rare few threw a fit and threatened to sue me, though they never followed through with it.
Dating Disaster with a Billionaire (Blue Ridge Mountain Billionaires, #1) Page 1
