“Oh ok, the building that I took you to before?”
“Yeah.”
“Ok, that’s what’s up.”
I saw people looking at us as we walked off, why not, he was the star player on the basketball team, tall as fuck, wavy as fuck, swagged as fuck, I don’t know why I was even into Paper in the first place, he could have his bitch and his baby, I thought to myself, as if Paper read my mind, he bought up Paper.
“So that dude that you was with the other day, is he your man?”
“Nah, not even, but why you wanna know?”
He was quiet for a minute, “Cause I am low key feeling you.”
I shoved him and laughed, “So now you are Bryson Tiller? Quoting his songs and shit,” I laughed and continued walking.
“Yo I am dead ass though, I wanted to know if you would go to the spring fling dance with me and shit.”
I looked at him to see if he was serious, and he was. “Yes, you know my birthday is on the same day, right?”
“No, say word?”
“Word.”
“So that mean’s I gotta make it extra special then.”
“Yeah that would be nice.”
“Here,” he said stopping and digging into his pocket. He handed me, two hundred dollars bills. “This is for your dress and shit, I don’t know if you ended it or not but just in case. I want you to look real special and shit, considering that I will be with the most beautiful girl at school.”
I blushed and took the money, I couldn’t say no with a compliment like that. After I put the money in my pocket, Jason took my hand and held it while he walked me home. I don’t know it was just a really good feeling; I am not going to lie. When we were a block away from the building, I could see Paper standing out front with a bunch of his friends and he look like he was drinking liquor in a bottle so I turned towards Jason and decided to cut it short because I definitely didn’t want any problems messing up this perfect day.
“Jason, I going to see you tomorrow at school ok? I gotta go.”
“No problem,” he said kissing me on my forehead. “Oh yeah, I am going to pick you up at eight, right here ok?”
“Ok”, I smiled as I took my book bag and jogged across the street and to the building. Paper and I grilled each other and acted like we didn’t know each other. When I got in the house, I said hi to his grandmother and she offered me dinner. I ate real quickly and went back to the room, did my homework and closed the door. I watched T.V for the rest of the night until I dozed off. Fuck paper, I thought to myself drowsily, I am too young to be stressing myself over adult problems. I had the perfect guy asking me to the dance, he could have any girl at Kennedy high, but he choose me. Why would I be worried about an irresponsible dumb guy? I wanted myself to believe all of that as I drifted off to sleep that night, but dreams they have a funny way of knowing your heart, and they don’t give a fuck about your pride.
The next couple of days flew by and it was the day of the dance and my birthday, after school, I went straight to Pitkin Avenue and bought me a fly pink and gold dress, gold shoes and I even got my hair done with the money that Jason gave me. The Dominicans had my hair long and silky with loose curls, and I just knew that I was going to be looking good tonight at the dance. When I got back in the house, I was surprised to see Paper in the room in the chair waiting for me.
“Yo, where the fuck you been, do you know what time it is?”
“Yeah it’s only 7.”
“What time does school end?”
“Three and?” I frowned at him.
“And your ass need to be the fuck back in this house by 4:30 the latest, you had me worried and shit.”
“Yeah? Well you don’t need to worry about me, worry about that bitch that’s having your baby. I am good, tonight is my birthday, and I am going to the school dance.”
“Say word? So you think you are grown now huh?” He said leaning back in his chair.
“Nigga, I know I am grown, I am 18 now, and I need you to get out of this room so I can get ready.”
“Aight whatever just make sure that nigga get you home at a respectful time, or imma crack that nigga upside his head.”
“Whatever,” I said smirking.
“Listen, I am sorry about the shit that happened the other day, it’s your birthday and shit, and a nigga shouldn’t have even been taking shit out on you like I did. I apologize, and I hope that you enjoy your special day, ok?”
“Ok Paper, I apologize too.”
After I closed the door I couldn’t stop thinking about Paper and the fact that he apologized, it kind of touched me and after I showered and got dressed, I kind of wished that Paper as out in the living room so that he could see how I looked but he wasn’t anywhere around. So when I got down stairs, Jason had the Cadillac stretched limo waiting for me and he got out and gave me flowers looking like a tall swagged out prince. I felt like the luckiest girl in the world. When I got inside of the car and we spend off, he held my hand and gave me a kiss on the cheek. “Happy birthday beautiful, I have something for you.”
I blushed and took the box that he gave me, “Jason, you didn’t have to, what is it?”
“Open it and find out.”
I did and it was a charm bracelet with my name spelled out in charms.”
“Do you like it”, he asked, taking it and placing it delicately on my wrist.
“I love it Jason, thank you,” I said leaning over, and we kissed, his tongue intertwined with mines tasted like peppermint. When we reached the dance, everything was perfect, we took pictures on the way in and everyone was smiling at us. I seen Shawna and her crew giving me dirty looks, but I walked passed them like I didn’t even see them. The DJ played Meek Mill, and later on French Montana. I sat some songs out and Jason and I danced to others. When Planes by Jeremiah came on, I looked at him and he knew what it was, that was my favorite song. This was the first song that Jason and I danced to that was slow, so it was of course the first time that I felt his hands on my body. I liked how it felted but I always remembered how Paper’s hands felt on me and I shuddered. My panties also began to feel a little wet when I thought about the time that Paper went down on me. I wish that he wanted me; maybe his feelings will change when he realizes that I am 18 today. Jason kissed my ear and I jumped as he bought me back to reality.
“Did I tell you how beautiful you look tonight?” He whispered in my ear.
“Thank you Jason, you don’t look too bad yourself.”
“I have a question that I wanted to ask you?”
“So ask me,” I smiled even though I really just wanted him to shut up because I really liked this song but I couldn’t concentrate on it because Jason kept talking.
“I wanted to know if you would be my girl.”
The air got caught in my throat, shit I didn’t know what to tell him. I didn’t know if I wanted to be his girl, I mean yes he’s cute, and he’s talented, but on the other hand Paper is what I needed. I mean he protects me, and I just like him and how he makes me feel, but on the downside of things I think he has a girl, and now he is talking about they are having a baby, and he didn’t fucking yell at me. I really don’t know how I feel right now. To buy myself some more time, I just told him what was on my mind. “Listen, how about you give me a little time to think about it.”
“I want to know tonight”, he said pulling back and looking at me. “How about when we get in the car you tell me.”
“Ok Jason.” He smiled, and kissed my hand.
“That ladies and gents will be the last dance for the evening, Thank you all for being a part of our Spring Fling home coming dance.”
We all claps and looked at each other and Jason grabbed my hand and lead me outside. Our limo was waiting for us, and he opened the door and we got in. In was real warm and cozy inside and Jason moved in close and put his arm around me. “You know how much I am feeling you Willemena right?”
“Yes Jason.”
“So I don’t understand what’s so
hard about you saying you would be my girl.”
“Jason, I just don’t know right now, so much is going on, I don’t think I could be what you want right now, so the answer is going to be no, but I like being friends with you.”
He dropped his arm from my shoulder, and we were quiet for the rest of the ride. When the Limo pulled up to the building, I looked at Jason but he was looking in the opposite direction out of the window.
“I am sorry,” I told him but he didn’t respond so I just got out of the car and the limo sped away.
I went into the building and when I got into the apartment, everything was dark and quiet, so I assumed everybody had left, but when I turned the lights on, Paper was sitting on the couch looking somber and I could tell from that expression that something wasn’t right.
“Paper what’s wrong?” I asked sitting my purse and keys on the table, I saw some happy birthday balloons, flowers and cupcakes on the table, by I bypassed them and went over to Paper.
“It’s grand ma.”
“What about her?” I sat down on the couch preparing for the worst.
“She’s in the hospital, she had a mild heart attack, I left because I just couldn’t stand seeing her like that will all of those tube hooked up to her. I got you those balloons and shit from the hospital gift shop on my way out.”
Tears fell from his eyes and I moved in close, to wipe them.
“Thank you for the balloons Paper and it’s going to be ok; I consoled him, “She’s going to be ok, I am going to pray for her and everything is going to be ok, I promise.”
“Yo Willemena, she is all that I got, I can’t lose my Grandma.”
“You got me, Paper; everything is going to be ok.”
“Can I have you?” He said, his lips crushed into mines, tasting like tears and beer, I sat up on his lap, Filled with emotion and I kissed him on his neck, “Take me, I been telling you I am yours,” I whispered to him as I unbuckled his pants and he let me, when I pulled his dick out, it was real firm and long, and I was a little scared. He was grabbing my thighs and then he touched my ass so softly that I wanted to melt. “I need you Willemena, please don’t leave me, I am sorry about what I said before, I don’t know what I would really do if you would of walked out.”
My nipples and everything was throbbing so much just from him being vulnerable to me and saying that he wanted me, that I lifted up my body and position my pussy to sit down on his dick, but just the slight tap of pressure hurt and his dick wouldn’t even go in, my pussy was shut, I cried out in pain, and moved myself.
I looked at Paper in the dim light, He took off my dress gently as I raised my hands in the air., he lifted me up and carried me into the bedroom, laid me down and took my panties off. He gently sucked on my titties while playing with my clit, and I thought that I was going to go crazy with how he made my body feel. When he went down and put his mouth on my pussy, I shuddered out in desire, he was going around in circles making my pussy real wet and sucking gently on my throbbing clit, just when I was about to come, he moved up and rubbed the head of his dick against my pussy, and I screamed out in pleasure and he pushed is dick into my hole at the same time. At first it wouldn’t go in but he pushed in a little more, “I want you, and I want this pussy”, he said as he pushed a little deeper and his dick went in a little more, “I want you to belong to me”, he pushed and it went in deeper, “Zzzzz, pussy locking up on my dick so right, give me this pussy, let me in.”
I slowly starting throwing the pussy at him, without noticed I felt myself riding this wave and my body tightened up and started to shake again,
“That’s right rain on my dick, oh my God, I am about to nut,” he pulled out and jerked his dick on the bed, and when he finished, he held me from behind, and said into my ear, “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“You ain’t ever going to leave me right?”
He sounded like a little boy, “No, I won’t.” And we slept just like that. The next morning he was still holding me behind, when he felt me stir, he kissed on my back, then he squeezed my nipples, and his hands slide down my stomach and too my wet pussy and then I felt him slip his dick inside of my pussy but this time my pussy welcome him and I was throwing it back on his dick.
“ZZZZZ, this fucking wet tight ass pussy got me about to nut all early”, he said pulling out his dick that was already shooting sperm everywhere. We showered together and I told him that I wanted to stay home and go to the hospital with him to see his grandmother but he made me go to school. We took the bus, and he walked me to the door and kissed me. When I got in the building, I was just dumb happy, it felt like the sun was shining on me at all times, I felt light headed and carefree, I guess I can owe that feeling to losing my virginity, I smirked to myself as I put my books in my locker and closed it. Just as I looked up, Jason and Shawna approached me, and bumped into me real hard. I looked at Jason and he smirked.
“Look baby”, Shawna turned to Jason, “These bitches in this school don’t know how to look where they are going.”
“I can tell.”
I was kind of stunt for two reasons, one, that Jason was with Shawna and two, that Shawna would still fuck with me after what happened last time. Without a second thought I punched Shawna in her face, and we started going at it, she was pulling on my hair and I was fucking her up, I took a slight punch to the head, but it was nothing like the shit I was raining down on her. Before I knew it, the dean and the security guards were breaking us up, and I found myself in the principal’s office. I don’t know what was going to happen, this is my Senior year, so I definitely wasn’t trying to fuck up, I only had three more months left in this bitch before I graduate, so I was sitting there biting my nails like crazy trying to figure out what was next. When I got into the office, the principle looked at me with disappointment, “Willemena, what is going on with you, I never had any issues out of you before, is everything ok?”
“Everything is fine”, I told Mrs. Eddison, “It was just a misunderstanding.”
“Well I am going to still have to call your mother to come pick you up.”
At the sound of those words, my heart started to beat rapidly as she dialed my mother’s number right in front of me. “Yes, Mr. Bradworth? Your daughter had a fight at school, I guess it’s best that we dismiss her for the rest of the day; can you please come to the school and pick her up? Ok thank you.”
“Listen Willemena, go sit outside in the office until your mother comes, I am letting you off this time with a warning, but if this happens again, I am going to have to suspend you and withdraw you from participating in graduation.”
“It won’t happen again,” I reassured her as I walked out of the office and took a seat. Dam that bitch done called my mother, I haven’t seen her in about three months, and I didn’t even know how to feel right now, happy or sad.
After about thirty minutes, she walked into the office and signed me out, and I looked at her, she still looked the same. Same chocolate flawless complexion, beautiful hair cut into a bob, and thick body. I wanted to run into her arms, cry and tell her that I have changed, but I was scared, and I knew better. We both quietly walked out of the door. Once we were outside she turned to me, “Are you alright? What the fuck was you even fight about? Did she hurt you?”
“Nah mama, I am good, and I don’t know why we were fight, she started it.”
She looked at me and touched my hair, and then she dropped her hand and looked away. “Where have you been staying?”
“With a friend.”
“Look, I am fucking sorry, for what happened alright? But you gotta learn and that’s the only way I knew how.”
Dam why did she have to curse, I thought to myself, the funny thing was that I didn’t feel that connection anymore, that dependency that I use to have for her.
“Look if you wanna come back, you can.”
I just looked at her; she didn’t say that she wanted me back, hell I could tell from the way that she said
it that she really didn’t mean it. I didn’t want to go back to a place that people didn’t really want me. Paper wanted me and he told me that.
“Nah, I am good where I am at.”
“Ok, well happy belated birthday,” she said almost with relief.
“Thank” I said, and I turned around and walked away, I can’t believe that she didn’t come looking for me after she threw me out, and I just really felt empty towards her, after I took a few steps away from her, I willed myself not to cry, bitch be strong, don’t let her see that you are weak, you better not cry, I walked holding my breath, until I got to the bus stop, and I let it all come out. I then walked pasted the bus stop and decided to walk home. When I got in and I seen Paper, I ran to him and started to cry. He didn’t ask me any questions, just took me into his room, closed the door and made love to me until I fell asleep.
One gone, one received
Paper
It was about 7am in the morning and I was a couple blocks away from Tiffany’s house, the neighborhood wasn’t really awake yet and was just trying to come alive. I had to meet her over here early so that we could drive to the abortion clinic together because today was her appointment. She and I both knew that we weren’t ready for no kids together and my life wasn’t all the way together yet to finance no child, so we were both doing what was best for us. When I knocked on the door and she answered, her eyes were puffy, red and shit, and I exhaled and thought to myself that I hope that this bitch don’t start with the theatrics. We already said what we were going to go; I hope that this bitch doesn’t change her mind.
“Are you ready?” I asked her quietly.
“Yeah let me get my coat,” she said running back in the house. I stood outside and looked around, and she came back out in no time. We hopped in the car and made our way to the city, the ride there was pretty much quiet. When we pulled up to the clinic and parked, there she was with that somber expression again.
Ain't no hitta like the one I got: part one Page 5
