The Fairy-Tale Detectives (The Sisters Grimm, Book 1)

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The Fairy-Tale Detectives (The Sisters Grimm, Book 1) Page 9

by Michael Buckley


  "I'm a lot of things, but nice isn't one of them," the boy called after them.

  "Maybe we should team up with him? He could fly over the forest and spot the giant," Daphne suggested to Sabrina.

  "Daphne, you saw what a lunatic he is. I don't want him to ruin whatever slim chance we might have."

  • • •

  The path to the front door of Granny Relda's cottage seemed like a walk up a mountain, and by the time they arrived at the house Sabrina was nearly asleep standing up. She took out Granny's key ring and felt the weight of a hundred keys jingling in her hand, singing their mysteries.

  By the time all the locks were open, it seemed as if hours had passed. Elvis was asleep and drooling on the sidewalk, swinging his thick legs back and forth as he dreamed.

  As Sabrina unlocked the final lock, she turned to her sister and smiled. "That's all of them." She twisted the knob and leaned into the door. Unfortunately, the door didn't swing open. In fact, it didn't budge at all.

  "What's wrong?" Daphne said, sitting up. She had been resting on the ground with her head on Elvis's warm belly.

  "It's jammed," Sabrina said, pushing her shoulder against the big door to force it open.

  Daphne got up and walked over. "Are you sure you unlocked them all?" she said. Sabrina fumed. If she knew anything, it was how to unlock a door. They'd escaped from a dozen foster homes in the last year and a half. Locks were not Sabrina's problem. She took the cold doorknob in her hand and turned it, proving that she had unlocked it. She pushed hard but still nothing happened.

  "Well, it's not opening. Maybe the back door," she said, preparing to circle the house.

  "You've forgotten the secret," a familiar voice commented. Puck floated to the ground, his huge wings disappearing just as he landed.

  "What do you want?" Sabrina demanded.

  "I did a flyby, all the way up into the mountains. I found some tracks, but no giant," Puck said. "I sent some pixies to keep searching without me."

  Sabrina turned the doorknob angrily, hoping the door would suddenly open so she could laugh as she slammed it in Puck's face. But again, nothing happened.

  "You have to tell the house you are home." Puck sighed.

  "Of course!" Daphne knocked on the door three times. "We're home," she said, repeating the same words the girls had heard Granny Relda say each time they had entered the house, and turning the doorknob. The door finally swung open.

  "How did you know that?" Daphne asked Puck.

  "The old lady and I are close. She tells me everything."

  Elvis immediately leaped to his feet and trotted into the house, nearly knocking over the girls on his way to the kitchen. The girls followed, and Puck pushed his way in as well, closing the door behind him.

  "Now, I know I'm one of the bad guys," the boy said, tossing himself into the fluffy recliner in the living room. "But the old lady does provide me with a meal from time to time. Not that I feel any loyalty, but if she were to get eaten by a giant, my free lunches would disappear. So, we should probably get started."

  "We? What do you mean we?” Sabrina cried.

  "Of course, you two will have to keep this to yourselves," the boy continued, ignoring Sabrina. "I do have a reputation as the worst of the worst. If word got out that the Trickster was helping the heroes . . . well, it would be scandalous."

  The girls stared at each other, dumbfounded.

  "First things first. I want you two to prepare a hearty meal so that I will have plenty of energy to kill the giant," Puck instructed.

  "You've got to be kidding," Sabrina groaned.

  "The old lady always makes lunch when a mystery is afoot. I know it's not the most glamorous work, but I think you two are best suited for domestic tasks."

  "What does domestic tasks mean?" Daphne asked.

  "The way he means it is women's work," her sister replied.

  Daphne snarled at the boy.

  "Besides, as your leader I need to save my energy for the battle," Puck insisted.

  Sabrina's temper boiled over. "Leader! No one made you leader. No one even said they wanted your help!"

  "You may not want it, but you need it," the boy shouted back. "The two of you can't even get into your own house. Do you think you'll strike fear into a giant?"

  "Maybe if you two keep shouting, the giant will come to us," Daphne said.

  Sabrina and Puck stared angrily at each other for a long moment.

  "Who's hungry?" Daphne said. "I'm going to go do some domestic tasks for myself."

  Sabrina was too hungry to fight any longer. Eating would clear her head. The three children raided the refrigerator and dug through the breadbox, grabbing anything and everything they thought they could eat. Puck seemed to share Daphne's big appetite; both of their plates were heaped with odd-colored food. The two also ate the same way—like hungry pigs, scarfing down anything that came close to their mouths. They were both working on seconds by the time Sabrina had made two Swiss cheese sandwiches and found what she hoped was just a weirdly colored apple.

  "So, what's with the crown?" Daphne asked.

  Puck's eyes grew wide. "I'm the Prince of Fairies. Emperor of Pixies, Brownies, Hobgoblins, Elves, and Gnomes. King of Tricksters and Prank-Players, spiritual leader to juvenile delinquents, layabouts, and bad apples."

  The little girl stared at the boy with confusion in her face.

  "I'm royalty!" Puck declared.

  "So where's your kingdom?" Sabrina asked snidely.

  "You're in it!" he snapped. "The forest and the trees are my kingdom. I sleep under the stars. The sky is my royal blanket."

  "That explains the smell," Sabrina muttered.

  The Trickster King ignored her comment and munched hungrily, tossing apple cores and whatever he couldn't eat onto the floor. A turkey bone soared from his hand and landed on a nearby windowsill.

  "Puck, can I ask you a question?" Daphne said.

  "You bet."

  "If you knew Shakespeare, why do you look like you're only eleven years old?"

  This was something Sabrina had been wondering about as well. Granny's explanation that magic kept the Everafters alive just wasn't making sense. Mayor Charming and Mr. Seven had to be hundreds of years old, yet they looked as if they hadn't aged at all.

  "Ah, that's the upside of being an Everafter," Puck said. "You only get as old as you want to be. Some decided to age a little so that they could get jobs and junk like that."

  "Then why didn't you?" Sabrina asked.

  Puck shrugged. "Never crossed my mind. I plan on staying a boy until the sun burns out."

  Sabrina thought that she'd like to see him running around in the dark as the earth froze over. She bit into her sandwich, only to discover that the Swiss cheese tasted more like hard applesauce.

  "So, tell me what happened with the giant," said Puck.

  While Sabrina ate, Daphne told the boy the whole sordid mess. She told him about the farmhouse that had been stepped on by the giant and how Mayor Charming had demanded that Granny Relda give up her detective work. How the farmer had spoken to a man named Mr. Englishman, and how a witch had erased the farmer's memory. She told about the gang of thugs that had attacked them outside of the hospital, and how, when they had followed the gang back to a cabin, they had spotted Charming again. Then she told him about the giant's attack, how he had killed the thugs, and how he had snatched up Granny and Mr. Canis.

  Sabrina got up from her chair and went into the living room, where she stood in front of one of the many bookshelves.

  "Books on giants . . . where would they be?" she said to herself. Puck and Daphne got up to join her, and together they scanned the bookcases.

  "Look!" Daphne said.

  Sabrina looked closely at the shelves Daphne was pointing to. They seemed to hold a collection of diaries. She took one down and read the title: Fairy-Tale Accounts 1942—1965, by Edwin Alvin Grimm.

  "There's a book here for everyone in our family, I guess, including this one
," said Daphne as she pulled one from the shelf and handed it to her sister. Sabrina almost dropped it when she eyed the title: Fairy-Tale Accounts by Henry Grimm. It was a book written by their father! She flipped through it, recognizing her dad's neat handwriting. She ran a finger along the short circles his words made, tracing his hand's movement from when he had put the words on paper. She turned more pages, feeling more of him in his words—not bothering to read, just taking comfort in knowing that he had once held the book.

  "Let me see," Daphne said as she snatched the book from her sister's hands.

  "You're wasting your time with these stupid books. I'm the smartest person I know and I've never read a book in my life. We should all be out looking," Puck said.

  "If you want to go, there's nothing keeping you here," Sabrina said as she snatched her father's book back from Daphne. The two girls rushed to the dining room table and hovered over the slightly dusty journal. They flipped to the first page. A color photograph of Mayor Charming, dressed in royal gowns of purple-and-white silk, stared back at them. He wore a sapphire-and-diamond crown and a dazzling ruby ring on each finger. He smiled smugly, as if he thought very highly of himself.

  Elvis sauntered into the room and licked Sabrina's hand. He spied Charming's picture and growled.

  "Don't worry, Elvis! He can't get us now," Daphne said. Sabrina read aloud what her father had written.

  "He's rebuilding his kingdom," Sabrina said as she flipped to the next page. There she found more interesting facts. "It's all in here. Listen to this."

  "But what's that got to do with giants? And if he wanted to buy the farm, why did he send that Mr. Englishman to do the work?" Daphne asked.

  "I believe that Mr. Englishman and Mayor Charming are the same person. Charming does have an English accent. He could have worn a disguise so Mr. Applebee wouldn't recognize him as the mayor," Sabrina said.

  "I bet you're right!" her sister said.

  "But where does the giant come in?" Sabrina wondered aloud.

  "In the old days, giants and people used to work together all the time," Puck said, stealing the purple apple from Sabrina's plate and chomping on it.

  "They did?"

  "Oh yeah, giants are pretty dumb," the boy said. "From what I hear you can pretty much talk them into anything."

  "He's right." Daphne was poring over a large book entitled Anatomy of a Giant. "I don't know what this word is," she said.

  "How is it spelled?"

  "A-L-L-I-A-N-C-E-S."

  "It's alliances; it means to team up or join a group," Sabrina explained.

  "It says that in olden days people used to form all-all . . ."

  "Alliances."

  "... alliances with giants to destroy their enemies. People found that giants were very dumb and could be easily tricked."

  "Charming's using the giant to scare people off their land. Anyone that won't sell gets squashed!" Sabrina cried.

  "But you said he used Glinda to erase the farmer's mind, right?" Puck interrupted.

  "Yes."

  "Well, why would he do that? Why would he want the farmer to forget to be afraid?"

  "And don't forget the lens cap," Daphne added. "If he were trying to scare them off, why would he want to videotape it? I don't think I'd want any proof of what I'd done if it were me."

  Sabrina didn't have any more answers.

  "Let me finish," her sister said, looking down at the book. "It also says that rarely do these all-all ..."

  "Alliances."

  "Yeah, it says they usually backfire. In most cases, the human was eaten by the giant or dragged off to the giant kingdom to be a slave. There's a story here about a giant kidnapping a princess for an evil baron, and before the baron could collect a ransom from her family, the giant ate her," Daphne said quietly. "It says the townspeople used hound dogs to track down the giant because giants have a strong smell. When they caught him, he nearly killed the entire town before they could bring him down."

  The girls spent a moment looking into each other's worried eyes. What if the giant had eaten Granny and Mr. Canis? What if he was eating them as they wasted time doing research?

  "It says when giants got out of hand, the townspeople sent a hero to kill the giant for them," Daphne read. "His name was Jack and in his prime, he killed more than ten giants, stole treasure from the giant kingdom, and was world-famous."

  Sabrina turned her attention back to her father's journal. She flipped through more of its pages until she found an envelope stuffed inside.

  "What's this?" she wondered aloud.

  Daphne got up from her chair and walked around the table to look.

  "It says To Sabrina, Daphne, and Puck. From Granny Relda," Sabrina said.

  "See! I told you I knew her!" Puck cried.

  "Read it," Daphne begged.

  Sabrina tore open the letter and began to read.

  "She wants us to go into the room?" Puck said in amazement. "I've been trying to get in there since the day she told me it was off-limits!"

  "Cool! That's where she got that giant-detector she used at the farm," Daphne cried. "I bet the place is filled to the ceiling with stuff we can use to rescue them!"

  "Staring us in the face? What does that mean?" Sabrina said, but before she knew it, her little sister was halfway up the stairs with the key ring in her hand.

  "Wait up!" Sabrina shouted, taking the stairs two at a time. By the time she got to the top, Daphne was already trying keys.

  "I bet she's got a shrink-ray in here. We'll shrink him down to the size of an ant and stomp on him," the younger girl said.

  "Hurry," Sabrina said.

  Puck flew up the stairs and grabbed the keys out of Daphne's hands.

  "Royalty first, peasant."

  "She gave these keys to us," Sabrina snapped, snatching the keys from him.

  "A set of keys you have no idea how to use!" Puck shouted, taking them back.

  "Puck, give me those keys!"

  "No!"

  "Listen Puck, don't make me do something you're going to regret."

  "I've fought tougher guys than you, Grimm. Though most of them had better-smelling breath!"

  "WHAT IS GOING ON OUT THERE?" a voice suddenly boomed from behind the door. It startled them all so much that they fell backward onto the floor.

  "Did you hear that?" Daphne whispered.

  "Everyone heard that," Sabrina and Puck replied.

  "KNOCK OFF THAT RACKET RIGHT NOW!" the voice shouted angrily.

  "Maybe it's the sheriff? Maybe he got into the house somehow?" Daphne whispered.

  "Hamstead would have just come down and grabbed us," her sister said. "Besides, Elvis isn't freaking out."

  "Then who is it?" Puck said.

  "Granny locks that door for a reason. If there's someone in that room, Granny doesn't want them going anywhere. They might be dangerous," Sabrina warned.

  "I'm not afraid!" the boy cried.

  "I have an idea," Daphne said. She took Puck and Sabrina's hands and led them back down the stairs and into the kitchen.

  • • •

  Within minutes, the girls and Puck were standing at the bottom of the stairs again. Each was wearing a metal spaghetti strainer as a mighty battle helmet. Daphne wore an ancient washing board on her chest and had duct-taped huge metal spoons to each kneecap as protection from unfair kicks. She held a frying pan as her weapon. Sabrina had a pressure cooker lid taped to her behind. She held a wok pan for a shield and a rolling pin for a club. She swung it, preparing to whack whomever might be on the other side of the door. Puck had his trusty sword in one hand and a carrot peeler in the other. He'd found a couple of cookie pans to tape to his chest and back, and his feet were encased in oven mitts.

  The big dog stood behind them with an odd, confused expression.

  "We should send Elvis up first," Sabrina said.

  "Good idea," Daphne replied.

  Sabrina turned to the Great Dane. "Elvis, there's someone upstairs. Go get him!"
<
br />   Elvis sat down on his hind legs and used his back paw to scratch his neck. If he understood the order, he wasn't letting on. Discouraged, Sabrina turned back to her sister and Puck. "We'll go together and sneak up on him."

  They nodded in agreement, and all three took the first step up the stairs. Their "armor" clanged and knocked around, causing a tremendous racket. By the time they got to the top of the steps, Sabrina realized that a sneak attack was probably no longer realistic, so she went with plan B.

  "Whoever is up here better leave, 'cause we're armed to the teeth. I wouldn't want to be you when we find you!" Sabrina shouted. Her threat was met with silence.

  "Maybe he's gone," Daphne said hopefully.

  "I say we bust the door down and skin him alive," Puck said loudly.

  "There's going to be no skinning of anyone," Sabrina said as she fumbled in her pocket and pulled out the key ring. She started the tedious work of finding the right key, and soon one went in the lock and clicked.

  "Just stay together and, most of all, stay calm. If we don't panic, we can take this guy ourselves," Sabrina said.

  "On three," Daphne whispered, giving her frying pan a practice swing.

  "ONE, TWO, THREE!" Sabrina screamed, pushing the door open and rushing into the room. The trio swung their weapons frantically, slashing at whatever enemy dared to face their deadly kitchen utensils. After several minutes, and zero deadly hits, Sabrina stopped and looked around the room. In the moonlight from the single window, she could see it was empty, except for a wood-framed, full-length mirror that hung on a wall.

  Puck, who was lying on the floor laughing hysterically, roared, "STAY CALM, YOU SAY?"

  "Where did he go?" Daphne said, as she peered behind the door and found no one.

  "Maybe we imagined it," Sabrina said, scowling at the boy's laughter. "C'mon, let's get back to work."

  She turned to leave, but Daphne said, "Granny's note said that all the answers we need would stare us in the face." She pointed at the mirror.

  "It's just a mirror," her sister argued.

  "It can't hurt to take a look!" Puck said, and trotted over to it. Sabrina switched on the room light and reluctantly joined him, followed by Daphne, and together they looked at their reflection.

 

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