by Ava Miles
“But Chase is only here for a few weeks,” she said. “When his injuries heal, he’s going to go back to his life, his work. That’s not here.”
Natalie looked off, as if searching for the right words. There was a knock on the door.
“My cappuccino, I bet,” Moira said.
Sure enough, one of Chef T’s kitchen aides presented Natalie with a coffee tray when she opened the door. “Thank Terrance for making me a cappuccino too,” her sister told the man. Shutting the door, she brought the tray over.
Taking her time, Moira stirred honey into her beverage, added some cinnamon, and then took a long sip.
“If you’re falling for Chase,” Natalie said, “and I think you have fallen—you have to decide if you’re going to step into it or step back. Given how miserable I was when I stepped back from Blake for a while, I wouldn’t recommend it. By your own admission, Chase isn’t a man who shares personal information like this, which means you’re special to him. Why not talk about how you feel? If there’s one thing Blake has taught me, it’s that love is worth being vulnerable for.”
“I hate being vulnerable,” she said, taking another sip.
“I know. We were raised in the same family, remember? But we can choose differently. We don’t have to end up like Mom and Dad. Can you imagine how different things might have been if Mom had told Dad she was unhappy years ago?”
Sure, she’d wondered, but there was no changing things now. Their mom had finally told their dad how much she hated being ignored for his work. He’d continued to ignore her. She’d left. There was no coming back from that.
“I don’t know how to say it.”
“No one knows the perfect formula,” Natalie said. “Just say it. From your heart. He was vulnerable with you last night.”
She hadn’t thought of it that way. “You’re right.”
“I have my moments,” she said with a smile. “Blake and I haven’t told anyone, but I feel like this is the perfect time.”
Even before her sister lowered her hand to her belly, she knew. Tears filled her eyes.
“If Blake hadn’t been vulnerable with me and refused to let me push him away, we wouldn’t be having a baby.” Natalie brushed at her eyes. “Every morning, I wake up and the first sound I hear is him breathing next to me—okay, snoring some mornings, but don’t tell him I said that. I know how blessed I am to have a second chance with him.”
Gratitude washed over her as she reached down to touch her sister’s tummy. She was going to have a new niece or nephew.
“Loving someone is everything,” Natalie continued. “And now we’re going to have a baby. Moira, I know how important work is, how important it is to be fulfilled as a person, a woman…but home and family…it’s worth every moment of vulnerability.”
She leaned in and hugged her sister. “I’m so happy for you guys.”
“We were going to wait until I’m twelve weeks to tell everyone,” Natalie told her.
“I won’t say a word,” she said, looking at her sister’s belly in awe, imagining a little being growing in there. “Oh, this is so wonderful.”
“I know,” she said. “But back to Chase. What do you want? That’s what it really comes down to. Do you think he could be it for you?”
She wanted to tell herself it was too soon, but the emotion she’d felt with him last night…it was unprecedented. “I’m scared, Natalie. I’ve never felt this way about anyone. If I’m being honest, really honest…when I woke up in his arms this morning…it felt right.”
Wasn’t that the truth when it came down to it? Being with him felt right.
“Then maybe you tell him that,” Natalie said. “As someone who’s married to a strong, private man, I know first-hand that they have the same insecurities we all do.”
But Blake had gotten over that with Natalie, which was why he hadn’t given up on her despite how hard she’d tried to push him away. Now they were having a baby. “You tell Blake good job, okay?”
Her sister laughed. “If I have to hear him boast one more time about ‘getting it between the uprights,’ I might have to kill him. But yes, I’ll tell him. We’re both…so happy.” Tears filled her eyes then. “Mo, I almost blew it. Sometimes it still scares me how close I came to losing Blake for good out of stubbornness.”
She found herself getting teary eyed, dammit. “But you didn’t,” she told her, hugging her tightly. “And now you’re having a baby! It’s crazy.”
“You’re having a baby!” a familiar voice shouted. “I knew it was coming. Oh yeah, a baby! My twins are going to have another cousin.”
She and Natalie lurched apart. Jill Hale, who had the biggest mouth of anyone in the Hale clan, was standing just inside the now-open door, rotating her arms in the same direction as her hips. Moira thanked the dance gods that churning the butter had never caught on as a dance move. It was totally dorky, but so Jill.
“Shit,” Natalie whispered. “You weren’t supposed to hear that.”
Moira’s protective instincts kicked in. “Jill! Why didn’t you knock?”
Jill’s red hair bobbed as she continued dancing. “Mac told me you were in Natalie’s office. If Blake had been visiting, I would have knocked.”
“Oh, for God’s sake, Jill,” Natalie cried out, lowering her head to the table.
Their cousin stopped her geek-out. “What’s wrong? This is great news.”
“It’s not common knowledge yet.” Walking over to the door, Moira shut it and turned to Jill. “You listen to me. I love you, but you can’t keep a secret worth shit. Natalie and Blake plan on telling everyone in their own time. Until then, you aren’t going to say a word. Capisce?”
“Me? I’d never say a word.”
She looked so sincere, and yet… “If you say anything, Jill, I swear on every Hale past, present, and future that you will answer to me. I will steal your private chocolate stash in your office. I will tell Brian you’ve developed a gluten intolerance to baguettes and croissants. And if I have to, I’ll tell Uncle Arthur your dentist banned you from sweets, which means no more red hots for you.”
Jill sucked in her breath. “That’s so mean!”
“I’ll be your worse nightmare.”
Her green eyes—the Hale eyes Moira shared—narrowed. “I’ve had secret baby news myself. I know how precious it is. You didn’t have to threaten my personal food pyramid.”
Leave it to Jill to call chocolate, bread, and red hots a food pyramid. “So we’re clear?”
“Crystal,” Jill said. “Can I hug my cousin and express my happiness over the new baby?”
Moira rolled her eyes. “I suppose.”
Like the eager puppy she was, Jill pranced over to Natalie, pulled her out of her chair, and hugged her. Then it turned into a crazy salsa dance step, which finally teased a laugh out of Natalie.
“Big congrats, cuz,” Jill said. “I can’t wait to meet your little one. Do you want a girl or a boy?”
“I just want the baby to be healthy,” Natalie said with a smile. “And happy.”
Happy, Moira thought.
She knew what would make her happy. How could she not fight for that?
Chapter 20
When Bonnie appeared that morning, Chase felt better equipped to handle her. “You left your cat. I called to tell you, but you didn’t pick up.”
She bent over and picked Barney up when the kitten ran over to her. “Good morning to you too. I thought you could use a friend.”
He shifted on the couch to look at her. Hadn’t he expected that answer? “Well, he’s your pet. I didn’t like you leaving him here.” Okay, it hadn’t been a bad experience. The silly tabby had rolled over and over again on the rug after Moira had left, making him smile. Barney acted like he didn’t have a care in the world.
Chase didn’t want to get attached to him.
“Oh, that’s too bad,” Bonnie said, scratching him behind the ears. “It won’t happen again. Are you feeling better this morning?”
>
Her tone was light. “I want to apologize. I acted badly. That…appointment caught me off guard.”
There was extra warmth in her smile. “Don’t worry, Chase. Energy healing isn’t for everyone. I’m sorry if it distressed you.”
It wasn’t what Ally had done so much as what she’d said. After Moira had left this morning, he’d started thinking about their session again. He didn’t want to believe Ally could talk to his dad, but he couldn’t discount what had happened.
“Having a perfect stranger know things I don’t tell anyone is distressing,” Chase said, trying to figure out his next step. “You didn’t tell me she’s more than a healer.”
“Know many healers, do you?” She had the audacity to laugh. “It’s such a limited word, in my experience. I’ve met healers who run the gamut, but you’re right, I suppose. If you want to be technical, she’s a healer, psychic, medium, and empath.”
“You should have mentioned this,” Chase said, feeling the need to glower to make his point. “I didn’t want the other stuff.” Even though he couldn’t stop thinking about it.
“Ally was only doing what she was called to do to help you heal completely,” Bonnie said, setting Barney down. “The fact that it didn’t work for you is okay. Are you ready for the feng shui expert today?”
The thought of another person coming in here and throwing woo-woo all over him made him want to grind his teeth. But if there was a chance it would help his recovery, he had to keep an open mind. “I’m clapping my hands in excitement on the inside.”
“I’ll bet,” Bonnie said dryly.
Two hours later, Chase was using every diplomatic bone in his body not to toss Jarvis, the feng shui expert, out of his ear. The stylish black man was knowledgeable about all things feng shui, but he was also a touch dramatic.
“I don’t know what these people were thinking, decorating this place. A cactus in your wisdom and self-cultivation bagua? Bonnie, it’s appalling.”
From the look of it, the Christmas cactus had been left in the hopes of brightening up the place with minimal watering. “It seems like a practical decision to me,” Chase said. “It doesn’t require much maintenance to keep it alive.”
“It’s barely alive! Wisdom and self-cultivation are the prize jewels of our experience on planet earth. A cactus says you’re prickly about self-cultivation and don’t plan to feed your inner self.” He paused and took a good look at Chase. “Don’t take this the wrong way, darling, but looking at you in your adorable little scooter…this poor cactus could give you a run for the money in the health department.”
It was like the man knew him. “First, let’s get something straight,” Chase said. “Don’t call me darling. Second, move the damned cactus then. We don’t need to analyze me in the evaluation. This isn’t my house.”
Jarvis put his hand on his hip. “It’s your house for the time being. I won’t call you darling, but it’s important to bring the right energy to each bagua, Chase.”
“Look,” Chase said, “I’m only going to be here for a few more weeks, God willing. Make this place healing and calm and whatever else it needs. Bonnie said it might help me recover, and as you’ve pointed out, I could use all the help I can get.”
The man’s face softened. “You do need help. You have hunting and death in your relationship bagua,” he said, gesturing to the painting on the wall.
Chase glanced at it. A well-dressed man was shooting ducks. “Is that bad?”
Jarvis laughed out loud. “Bad? Not if you want to pursue women, shoot them, and then eat them.”
“I’m kinder than that,” Chase deadpanned, deciding he might have fun with this guy after all.
“I’ll bet you are,” Jarvis said, “but not by much. Let me put it this way. Do you ever want to get laid?”
“Who doesn’t?” he responded. Of course, the only woman he wanted to be with was Moira. He’d known before it would be hot between them, but after last night, he expected it was going to be a lot more personal. More so than it had been with anyone, perhaps.
Earlier, after she left, he’d had a moment of wondering if he’d shared too much. But he wasn’t a man for regrets or second-guessing. Telling her about the fire and his dad’s suicide had felt right. She’d more than proven his trust. And from the tender way she’d held him last night, she’d more than proven her heart.
“We move the painting,” Jarvis said. “Maybe to your wealth corner. You’re a corporate executive type, correct?”
He looked over to Bonnie for confirmation, which Chase somehow found amusing. What had Bonnie told the man?
“He is,” Bonnie said, jumping in to answer when Chase didn’t.
“The hunting aspect of the painting is good then,” Jarvis said, walking over to the painting. “I just don’t like the death.”
And so it went. Jarvis went from room to room, calling out everything from paintings to colors to the way his bed was positioned against the interior wall.
“You’ll sleep better with your feet facing the outside wall,” the man said with a wink. “Trust me.”
Chase let him do what he wanted until he emerged from the walk-in closet with the Home Sweet Love pillow. A spike of pain shot through Chase’s chest again, and he took a slow, controlled breath to control it. Good thing Andy was coming by later to check out his heart.
“This pillow! Why is something filled with such a beautiful intention languishing in your closet?” Jarvis traced the needlepoint with his finger. “This is excellent work. I would say it’s an antique. We need to put this in your relationship bagua.”
Chase could feel himself breaking out into a cold sweat. “No. I don’t want it out.”
“Why ever not, darl—oops, Chase? It’s beautiful!”
“I said I don’t want it displayed,” he told the man.
“I know it’s a little cutesy for a guy like you, but we don’t have much to work with in this rental. I really think—”
“It’s non-negotiable,” Chase said flatly. “Put it back in the closet.”
Jarvis gave him a scorching look. Good, one of Bonnie’s healing minions was finally giving him something he could work with. Anger, he understood. Ego, he understood. Chase might be helpless in the face of all the love and compassion talk, but in this realm, he was king.
“I value your expertise, Jarvis,” Chase said like he was handling an angry engineer, “but I can assure you that having this object in my relationship bagua will not produce any healing effects in me.”
“As you wish,” Jarvis said, walking back into the closet. “All done.”
“If you need to bring in some additional items or colors to create better baguas, you’re welcome to do so. Money is no object. I’ll have Evan send you photos of my current residence so you have a sense of colors and objects more suited to my palate.”
He had the man’s full attention now.
“No pink,” Chase said. “And nothing…what did you call it? Cutesy? Are we clear?”
Jarvis shook his head. “Perfectly. I’ll make some notes and finish up. When can I expect the photos of your current residence?”
Was he really going to bother decorating this place for the remaining few weeks of his residence? Looked like. “I’ll text him now and make sure they’re in your hands by the end of the day.”
“Brilliant,” Jarvis said. “I was told to make you my priority.”
Chase could see Evan saying something like that. “Then we understand each other.”
Jarvis lifted a brow. “The cat is a great addition to the energy in the house.”
“He’s not mine,” Chase said, looking over at Barney playing with his tail in the corner of the room.
“I see,” Jarvis said. “I’ll sit in the kitchen out of your way while I finish up my plan.”
“Great,” Chase said, watching the man walk out.
He felt a smile cross his lips. Man, it had felt good to tell someone how things were going to be. It made him feel like he was i
n charge of his own destiny again. Lately, he’d felt like everyone was telling him what he could and couldn’t do.
“You were hard on him,” Bonnie said, picking Barney up. “But it worked out. Jarvis is great at what he does, but he can be a bit intense. Do you want to tell me about the pillow?”
He shook his head, happy to realize it didn’t hurt like it had before Dr. Sarah had made him a human pincushion. “Nothing to tell.”
She made a disbelieving sound. “Your jaw locked and you started to sweat. I know you don’t want to hear this, but you can’t heal from pain you won’t acknowledge.”
“Bonnie, I know you mean well, but I’m fine.”
Barney meowed.
“You’re turning forty and having your ticker checked out today,” she said, giving him an arch look. “Again, it’s your health, but I care about my charges. I feel I would be remiss in not pointing out the incongruities between your pain and your words.”
“My pain and words?” he asked.
“A pillow shouldn’t make you feel pain, Chase,” she said simply. “I’ll go find Jarvis and make sure he hasn’t added any pink cashmere throws to his list just to piss you off.”
At another time it would have made him smile, but he was too worked up. Bonnie set Barney down in his lap on her way out. He wanted to hunch his shoulders. Why was everyone pushing him so hard?
Was he happy that a damn pillow made his chest hurt? No. He moved his scooter to the closet door and opened it. Jarvis had laid the pillow on top of the shelves. Chase studied it. He wished he could throw it away. God knows, he’d tried.
His mother had sent it to him as a Christmas present his freshman year of college in Boston, and he’d fought tears as he pressed it to his chest in his dorm room. There was no home sweet love in their family anymore.
Barney meowed and nudged him in the stomach. Chase shut the door on the pillow and the memories.
When Andy arrived for his checkup, Chase was in a foul mood. Feng shui hadn’t had the most positive effect on him.
“Wow,” Andy said, turning in a half circle. “Jarvis really did a number on this place.”
