by Amy Lignor
He sighed, already knowing what that meant. “There’ll never be a right time for us, will there?”
“People are counting on me. I can’t let them down. You’ll be okay, though. I just know that you’ll be there too. I’m sure of it,” she said, smiling at the love of her life.
“What does that mean?”
“You’ll see,” Emily laughed. “It’s actually kind of fun.”
“I love you. I never forgot.”
“Me either.” She closed her eyes and kissed him, as they coasted gently toward their friends waving in the distance.
“They’re all here?” Jason asked.
“Most of the time.”
The group stood together in a circle. Each of them looked around at the faces they loved so dearly—holding the hands of the souls they so desperately needed.
The archangel stepped forward tapping her on the shoulder. “It’s time.”
Emily looked over at Matt. His eyes were bright with excitement. After hugging Faith, she proceeded to cling to Jason. “I have to go now.” Kissing him with all she had, Emily sealed the promise that bonded them together for eternity. “I love you.”
The light shone around her, and Emily fell through the clouds—disappearing from sight.
***
Michael stared at the sad group. A feeling of loss came over him as he once again stared at the spot Emily occupied just a moment ago. He was already missing his young angel.
“Where’s she going now?” Faith asked.
Charles let out a bellow of laughter and slapped Michael on the shoulder. “With that one, who knows? Am I right?”
Michael stared down at the large hand, and smirked. “Come this way, my friends.”
As the gates of Heaven opened to receive them, Charles spoke, “Did you hear her strange accent? She’s definitely not Irish this time around.”
The archangel laughed. “Well, no one’s perfect.”
He herded the group through the gates, stopping briefly to talk to Jason. “You’ll be seeing her again soon. But there are a few things you need to know before you join her.” His eyes grew dark. “Next time may be the hardest life you’ll ever know.”
Jason’s brows furrowed with confusion as he continued to stare, completely awestruck at the heavenly surroundings.
Michael waved to his partner who was leaning against the gate. Pulling Jason away from the group, he marched him over to Gabriel’s side. “Jason, there’s someone you need to meet. I think he can help you.”
Gabriel extended his hand to Jason, glancing briefly over his shoulder as his favorite student’s light filled the hall.
Matt fell through the clouds, following his partner into another life. The archangels closed their eyes, and prayed for their children’s safe return, knowing full well that their second time around would be far more difficult than the first.
EPILOGUE
When I jumped through those clouds I’d been so sure of who I was and what I wanted. I was so eager to try again.
I look down at the book. Nowhere in its pages does it say—the end. Those words just don’t appear in a fancy font after the last paragraph.
So…I cry. I’m not crying for a lost love, or for the weakness of the fallen—not even unanswered prayers are responsible for my tears. I’m just crying for myself. The shelves behind me are littered with painful stories starring Matt and I. The only way to truly understand those stories—and to have an ending I can live with—is to go back.
I look into the brilliant blue eyes of my partner. Those eyes hold my past, present and future. Of that, I have no doubt. Not anymore. Whether that future is victorious or an utter failure, only God knows, I suppose.
Michael and Gabriel are standing nearby. I can feel them. Even dust stops falling, as if the inanimate objects are aware that they shouldn’t dirty the robes of these powerful partners.
Michael whispers, “Once upon a time you believed in them, child.”
The selfish girl, who has gone through so much, screams inside my soul. “Once upon a time they deserved my belief.”
I look up into eyes that are filled with a father’s disappointment, but the anger in me is too strong to ignore. “There’s no once upon a time for us, Michael. Our fairy tale turned into a nightmare a long time ago.”
My partner speaks for the first time. “There can still be a happily ever after.”
After all we’ve seen, I’m astounded to hear the hope in Matt’s voice. It makes me want to cry. “Do you really believe that?”
He gazes into my soul. “Most ardently.”
A loud bang echoes through the library. The students around us are sitting on the edge of their seats; a look of fear appearing on their faces. I stare at one of the newly trained warriors sitting across the room. He’s smiling. He’s…eager. I feel sick.
Gabriel tosses a large book on the table. It skids across the polished wood and knocks the story of my first life to the floor. I stare into his amber eyes. I suppose I should be afraid of him—his power—but I can’t find my fear. It’s apparently buried under my anger.
“Maybe this one will bring back your faith. You need to find it again, Emily. We need to set things right.”
“I don’t want to,” I say to the awe-inspiring entity. I slide the mammoth book back across the table. “I’m done. I don’t need to read it. It’s already burned into my brain.”
“Obviously not.”
“You know how this ends!” I know I’m shouting. I wait for the librarian with the strict eyes to appear and smash my skull in with a book, but I have to continue. I have to make them understand. “You have your own Book, Gabriel. Humans used to read it all the time. Trust me, I know how this ending is written.”
“You need to remember your own judgment day, Emily. Only then will you realize how to stop theirs from happening.”
“Why should they be so lucky? Let justice be served, right?”
Gabriel’s cheeks turn red.
Michael quickly places his hand on his partner’s shoulder. “Emily, there is no us and them. Destroy them and we cease to exist. Without them, there would be no one left to believe…to fight…to pray. We would become unnecessary. Two sides are needed for balance, remember?”
Gabriel points at the book where this fact, I suppose, should have struck home. The book is a record of my second life down below—the one that stole every ounce of faith I ever had when I trusted the wrong person. I know the story. I know what it entails, and I have no desire to relive the mistakes I made.
But Gabriel continues, “If we knew how you lost your hope, maybe we could stop them from losing theirs. We need your help. Matt needs your help.”
Warning bells suddenly peal through the library. Wings beat overhead as the flock races to the next terrifying disaster.
A ripple of fear shoots through my body. This sound—the awful bells—just appeared in Heaven a few short decades ago. They’re used as an alert. When they ring out, a monumental tragedy is happening down there—the silencing of hundreds of souls in an instant.
My partner stands up to follow his teacher, but Gabriel shakes his head. “It’s not time.”
Matt looks back at me. His blue eyes pleading. “Read it, Emily. Find where you lost your hope before it’s too late.”
Michael’s hand is suddenly on my shoulder. “Save them, and you save us. You won’t be happy with anyone until you understand that simple fact.”
I shiver at his statement.
Kissing my forehead, Michael joins his partner. They jump through the glass window set in the marble floor into what, I assume, is hell on earth.
Matt sighs and takes his seat; the emotions of a warrior eager to fight burn in his eyes. He stares across the table at me. I find myself, as always, trapped in the honesty of his gaze, but his eyes shine with the faith that I just don’t have anymore.
“Try.”
“They don’t deserve it, Matt. Listen to the bells. Don’t you see the horrible things they d
o to each other every day? Why save them? Why even try? They’ve proven time and time again, they just don’t care.”
“Then don’t do it for them—do it for me.”
“But they’re ripping us apart!”
Matt offers me a smile filled with the love that I know I don’t deserve anymore. “Impossible.”
I sigh. His is the soul I’ve fought beside through all of our lives together. He’s the one I’ve killed for—died for—and, even after everything that’s happened, he’s still the one I can’t refuse. It just isn’t in me.
“I have to go back,” Matt says. “With or without you, Em. I have to go back.”
“Why?”
“I’m not done.”
He’s so sure. After everything we’ve seen he’s still so sure of what’s right and what’s wrong. Yet, for me, the lines have mixed together blurred beyond comprehension.
I reach down and open the worn cover. I build up my courage and try to block out the screaming inside my head. Reaching out, I take his hand and stare down at the words that I’ve tried so long to forget.
Anya. The first word of the first sentence turns my soul to ice, but I take a deep breath.
I suppose Michael’s right. If there’s any chance for me to be truly happy>—then I have to take this journey again. I need to have the one I love by my side.
It was time to look back at our second coming, and relive my very own judgment day.
