Break Free of Your Depression
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Break free of your depression
Problem: certain events in life, biological predispositions or an overly stressful environment can sometimes cause an imbalance in our bodies, which then start to show signs of physical or psychological pain.
Aims: to learn to recognise the symptoms of depression in adults, surround yourself with the right people and take the time to get better.
FAQs:Lately, I have been feeling listless and constantly exhausted. Am I depressed?
Why do women suffer from depression more often than men?
Antidepressants often have a bad reputation. Are they really safe?
Are alternative treatments effective?
How can I help a loved one who is depressed?
Is a relapse inevitable? What can I do to protect myself against it?
There are a number of signs that may indicate that we are depressed: we feel tired, we do not take pleasure in anything, and we sometimes feel no emotion, while at other times we are overwhelmed by sadness. When we are seriously affected, it is not always easy to identify the reason for this psychological pain.
For several months, Carly has been feeling tired. However, she finds it hard to go to sleep at night, and when she finally manages to, she keeps waking up and struggles to go back to sleep. She cannot stop thinking about her boss, who always seems to be watching her and waiting for her to slip up. Her self-confidence is crumbling. Her memory sometimes fails her at the end of a long day. Just the idea of going to work leaves her exhausted, and she is tempted to stay in bed so she does not have to deal with her daily life. Her husband is doing his best to support her, but it is not enough. She feels alone and as if nobody understands her. She cries a lot. She sometimes wants to disappear so that she stops being a burden for her family. Her friends have gradually drifted away because she no longer wants to see them due to her lack of energy.
Society often fails to understand depression, confusing it with a temporary feeling of sadness or listlessness. But what is this illness that eats away at us from the inside and stops us from feeling joy or pleasure? Is there a predisposition to depression? Are we all equal before this illness? And, above all, is it really possible to overcome serious depression?
If these questions have been gnawing at you, this guide can help you find the answers. You will learn how to recognise the symptoms and origins of depression, and find advice to help you adopt new approaches and habits to begin to enjoy life again.
What is depression?
Sadness or depression?
Feeling down and having doubts are part of life: experiencing them from time to time therefore does not mean that you are depressed. It is also essential to distinguish between temporary sadness and depression, which is much harder to shake off. In our lives, we go through different periods depending on our age, and these are accompanied by a wide range of intense feelings and emotions. It is natural for our moods to change over the course of a single day, which may lead to us feeling down. However, this is very different to the existential angst we can feel if we are depressed.
According to the DMS-IV (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders), depression is a mood disorder. For this illness to be diagnosed, the patient must display several specific symptoms which cause serious suffering. These symptoms most often manifest themselves as an unusual and painful degree of sadness, as well as a loss of interest in activities and hobbies that the person used to enjoy. These symptoms must be present:
over a period of at least two weeks;
almost every day;
almost all day long.
When this kind of unhappiness surfaces, we often look for the causes of our depression, whether they are external (“it’s because of my money problems”, “if I had a boyfriend/girlfriend I would feel better”) or internal (“it’s because I’m useless”, “I’m incapable of succeeding in life”). We try to understand to what is happening, and the same questions keep coming back to us: why has this hit me? What did I do to deserve this? However, there are several factors at the root of depression. They can be:
biological (disturbances in brain function);
psychological (self-esteem, a difficult separation during childhood, psychological defence mechanisms, misplaced negative beliefs, etc.);
environmental (permanent stress, presence or absence of a support network, etc.).
Did you know?
According to the World Health Organisation (WHO), depression affects over 350 million people worldwide. It is the leading cause of disability, and affects women more often than men (Depression, World Health Organisation).
The different types of depression
The causes and types of depression are equally varied. Depression can be classified into several categories depending on different factors, such as:
Duration. If it lasts for several years, it is referred to as chronic depression.
Severity. The more symptoms a person has, the more they will suffer and the more their life will be disrupted. In this case, the depression is described as severe.
Period. There are several types of depression, depending on when symptoms appear. These include seasonal depression, which is present in winter but goes away in spring, post-partum depression, which appears in the months after a woman has given birth, and depression which follows grief, when the depressive symptoms are overwhelming and have still not gone away after two months.
There is also a particular kind of depression which is characterised by a depressive episode (general torpor and lethargy) followed or preceded by a manic episode (a period of overexcitement and euphoria). This is known as bipolar disorder. These mood changes occur regularly and often seem disproportionate in relation to the event which triggered them.
Symptoms to watch out for
Depression is sometimes difficult to diagnose, because its symptoms are numerous, varied and common. However, a major change in your usual state, your reactions and your behaviour may indicate that you are depressed. The symptoms of depression include:
an unusual degree of sadness that nothing can ease, and a feeling of fatality with no apparent cause;
a loss of interest and enjoyment in daily activities and your favourite pastimes;
general torpor and lethargy:in your emotional life, which results in feelings of despair and anxiety, uncontrollable and repeated bouts of crying, hypersensitivity or emotional numbness, or a feeling of being unloved, useless or alone;
in your body, characterised by permanent tiredness, physical pain (often headaches or back pain), facial inexpressiveness, appetite changes and sexual dysfunction;
in your intellectual capacity, reflected by difficulty thinking, expressing yourself or concentrating, a feeling of powerlessness when confronted with a particular task, constant pessimism and suicidal thoughts.
Remember that the symptoms must be present for almost the entire day, almost every day, for a period of at least two weeks in order to be diagnosed as depression.
Test: are you depressed?
Answer the following questions honestly.
Have you recently gained or lost weight (at least 5 kg) unintentionally?
Do you feel exhausted or have no energy?
Do you feel more sluggish or, conversely, more agitated and nervous than usual?
Are you having difficulty concentrating?
Do you feel useless or guilty?
Do you often think about death (your own or somebody else’s)?
Are you having problems sleeping (too much or too little sle
ep)?
Have you lost your interest or enjoyment in activities you used to like?
Are you frequently overwhelmed by a profound feeling of sadness and/or do you regularly and uncontrollably break down in tears?
If you answered yes to at least three questions, this is a warning sign that should encourage you to speak to someone you can trust. Otherwise, your symptoms could develop over time into depression.
If you answered yes to at least five questions, you are probably depressed. It is vital that you consult a doctor or go to your nearest emergency department.
How can you overcome depression?
When you are suffering so much, it can be difficult to believe that there will be a positive outcome. Indeed, this illness makes us lose confidence in ourselves and traps us in a permanent state of inertia and despair. However, with whatever energy you have left, you can take steps to lift yourself up and see the light at the end of this very dark tunnel.
By yourself
The first thing to do is to tell someone you trust (a friend, a family member, a neighbour, a colleague or a doctor) how you are feeling. Indeed, while depressed people tend to think that talking will not make a difference and that nobody can help them, it has been proven that the people around them play a crucial role in the healing process.
“When I realised one morning that I couldn’t get out of bed or go to work any more, I understood that I wasn’t well. But what was wrong with me? I didn’t have a cold or the flu. I was ill deep down, as though I was wounded and empty inside. I summoned up the courage to call my mother, and spent an hour crying on the phone. I didn’t know what to say to her. She came over and took me to see a doctor. She said that she wouldn’t leave me in that state. That helped me a lot at the time. And even though I was stuck in the same state for several weeks, I managed to get out of that emptiness. The first call for help might have been the thing that saved me. I was no longer alone.” (Sonia, 26)
Accepting help when you have low self-esteem and tend to blame yourself for the state you are in is a difficult step, but it is the responsible and mature thing to do. It is important to recognise that you are not well, so that the people around you can do something to help and will better understand why you are acting the way that you are.
As soon as you have identified the warning signs, you need to act as quickly as possible to stop the illness from progressing or getting worse.
Quick tip
In a notebook, jot down the symptoms that are bothering you the most and your mood each day, or even in the course of a single day. This will allow you to track your physical and mental state and take the appropriate measures. Furthermore, your doctor can use these notes to better understand the situation.
Since depression is caused by a whole host of factors linked to a person’s overall functioning, it is important to put in place activities which have a positive impact on all these factors.
Treating the physical problems
To try and overcome your loss of energy, you could start with a physical activity that you enjoy, that is at the right level for you, and that gets you a little bit out of breath, such as swimming, cycling or walking. It is important to do this regularly, either by yourself or as part of a group, at a sports centre. Exercising at least twice a week is recommended.
Relaxation sessions can also be very effective, as long as they are carried out by a qualified instructor. These relaxation techniques work on muscle tension and allow you to clear your mind of any negative or lingering thoughts. For example, sophrology (a healthcare philosophy involving practical exercises for the mind and body) is ideal for centring yourself and letting go of everyday stresses. Music therapy and yoga can also prove effective. Research your options before you start any courses, make sure you see a professional, and regularly practice the activity you have chosen in order to get the full benefit from it.
“After I was hospitalised for a heart attack, I became depressed. I was constantly stressed about having another heart attack and dying. During my consultation at the hospital, the team suggested going to the gym to get back in shape and keep my heart healthy. I struggled a lot to go three times a week, because it was a long time since I’d done any exercise. Because I’d put on so much weight, I was embarrassed to let the other men at the gym see me. However, it’s a good thing that I went, because after just two weeks I already felt much better. I gradually got back into shape and started feeling comfortable in my own body again. The atmosphere with the other people in the group was good and everyone could do their exercises at their own pace. I got back my confidence in myself and my physical abilities. Now, I can’t imagine myself letting myself go like I did before.” (John, 62)
You should also try and eat a healthy, balanced diet, even though eating well is not necessarily easy when your appetite is affected. When you are depressed, you tend to eat too much or not enough. However, nutritional deficiencies can play a major role in depression, as they damage your body and can lead to other health problems (including eating disorders, digestive problems, heart problems, difficulty concentrating and tiredness), whereas a varied diet tailored to your needs will increase your energy levels and general wellbeing. There are also a number of basic points that you need to pay attention to if you want to take care of your health: avoid skipping meals, eat at regular times and make sure you stay hydrated (at least 1.5 litres of water per day). Foods that are high in fibre, vitamins and minerals (namely whole grains, fruits and vegetables) and protein-rich foods (such as meat, fish, dairy products, eggs and legumes) should be consumed on a daily basis and in the right quantities to have a real impact on your mental health.
Watch out!
When their unhappiness becomes too difficult to deal with, some people tend to seek refuge in drugs or alcohol to relax and forget their problems. Although these substances may make you feel better for a time, in reality they are false friends, because they make depression worse. You end up trapped in a spiral that will make you increasingly isolated and unwell. Make sure you steer completely clear of drugs and alcohol! If you take addictive substances, the best thing to do is to talk to a doctor who will help you to limit your usage or stop completely.
Learning to open up again
Often, when a person is suffering from depression, their social network will shrink, with harmful effects on their day-to-day life. However, it proves difficult to build new relationships or re-establish contact with the people they have pushed away.
It is therefore important to make the most of the days when you feel a little better to develop your social skills. You can do this by inviting a group of friends to go out with you (perhaps to an art gallery, a show or a local fair, for example). These little exchanges will refresh you, boost your self-confidence and pull you out of the isolation you have been stuck in for so long.
If you are going through a period when it is too difficult to approach others and other people cannot listen to you any more, it is essential to seek outside help. Go to a mental health service and ask to see a psychiatrist or psychologist, or join a support group.
With the help of a professional
Who should you consult?
Your doctor is the only person who can diagnose you with depression. GPs are often the first to listen to patients suffering from depression. They can prescribe treatment and work with a colleague if necessary (a psychiatrist, psychologist, kinesiotherapist or nutritionist).
Once you have been diagnosed, you must ensure that you will receive appropriate psychological care. A number of professionals focus on human psychology, and it is important to be able to distinguish between them so that you can choose someone who is qualified and right for you:
Psychiatrist. Psychiatrists are specialists in mental and behavioural illnesses and addictions, who have a medical degree and have undertaken an extra four or five years’ training in psychiatry. They genera
lly use a range of therapeutic methods to treat their patients, including medication and therapy.
Psychologist. Psychologists are mental health professionals who have studied psychology at university. Some have also undertaken training in psychotherapy. Psychologists mainly work by listening, and aim to help you express your unhappiness in a safe environment so that you can find an appropriate solution together. They are not there to judge you; on the contrary, they should be kind and empathetic. These specialists work either in a private practice or in social establishments such as prisons, businesses or schools.
Psychoanalyst. Psychoanalysts have undertaken general training and must fulfil three conditions to be able to work in their field: they must have been psychoanalysed themselves, they must have studied analytical theory, and they must be supervised in their work by another psychoanalyst. They use psychoanalytical methods to carry out their work and help their patients. The patient’s childhood, personal emotions and experiences are the basic material for their work, and they use these to outline the logical progression of the behaviour of the person they are treating.
Psychotherapist. Psychotherapists are healthcare professionals who have undertaken four years’ additional training in psychotherapy. This training can be in one of the following four recognised strands: psychoanalysis, systemic therapy, cognitive behavioural therapy, and humanistic therapy. They must also have proof of professional experience and write a report or thesis at the end of their training.
All these depression specialists work in either a private practice, a mental health centre or a guidance centre. It is also possible to make an appointment at a hospital or a clinic.