Every once in a while she’ll be the Becca I know and love, that’s sexy, fun and quirky—but then she’ll suddenly look as if she’s a million miles away.
Normally with Becca she talks nonstop as she tells me a million thoughts a minute as they pop up randomly in her head. She rarely sits still. She’s always bouncing around like a ball of energy, but lately she’s not been herself.
I thought earlier maybe it was because she still isn’t feeling well from whatever it was she ate last night that ended up making her sick this morning. But she’s been snacking on cotton candy and just ate a funnel cake so she has to be feeling better.
Women are impossible to figure out. Their moods change faster than the damn weather.
I can’t help but feel like she has something she’s been contemplating telling me or asking me. Because this morning she told me she needed to talk to me, but then Chase and Vance interrupted us before we could get a chance to talk.
Suddenly a thought hits me…
What if she knows about me enlisting?
I wouldn’t put it past Chase to slip while drunk and tell Ashlynn. Or maybe she did find my letter today, but is testing me to see how long I’ll wait to tell her.
I feel like an asshole waiting this long to tell her. By the way she’s acting she has to know.
Chapter Nine
Becca
My eyes roam over the sign at the front of the line for the Ferris wheel that states if pregnant you cannot ride. I bring my hand to my purse pressing against it as I think about the ultrasound I’ve been carrying around inside of it.
It’s now or never.
I need to tell him.
My hands are shaking as I hug them to my chest and glance nervously up at him. “I’m not feeling well. Can we skip the Ferris wheel and go back to the beach house?”
He pulls me against him as he steers me away from the line of people. “Sure. You should probably go to the ER if you’re still not feeling well. I don’t like seeing you sick, baby.”
The sound of him saying baby makes me breathe in a sharp intake of air as we walk past the hotdog stand. The smell immediately makes my stomach flip flop as a wave of nausea hits me. I look around frantically for a bathroom and spot a sign that says restrooms above a small building.
“I’m going to be sick!” I say frantically as I sprint towards the bathroom and run inside. I thank the lord and any other God out there that a bathroom is open so I don’t have to resort to throwing up in a damn sink.
I crouch down in front of the toilet ignoring the fact that it’s probably the most unsanitary place on the planet and hover over it as I release every drop of food I’ve eaten in the last twelve hours or so since the last time I got sick.
Climbing to my feet I push open the bathroom stall door and focus my eyes on the row of sinks a few feet ahead of me. I avoid all eye contact with anyone in the bathroom as I rinse my mouth and wash my hands. I’m beyond embarrassed that I just got sick in public and everyone in here heard me hurling my head off.
Parker is waiting for me outside the ladies room. “Are you okay? I really think we should go to the ER.”
“It’s fine. I don’t need to go to the ER Parker—because I already went last week.”
He looks down at me with a look of confusion. “You’ve been sick since last week?”
Grabbing his hand I pull him towards the stairs leading down to the beach. I don’t want to do this in the middle of a crowd of strangers. The second we get far enough down the beach I stop walking and tug on Parker’s hand. “Parker. I have something I need to tell you.”
“Okay…”
We sit down in the sand side by side staring out at the ocean with me curling up against Parker as he snuggles me up against him.
Reaching into my purse I pull out the tiny ultrasound picture and turn on the flashlight on my phone so that he can see it better. It’s pitch black out and the sky is blanketed with a sheet of twinkling stars, giving off just enough light to see where we’re going but not enough to see a photograph of a baby the size of a sesame seed.
“Is this what I think it is?” he asks with a shaky voice as he eyes the photo in his hand.
“It is—I’m five weeks pregnant. The baby was conceived around Valentine’s Day when you flew down to visit me.”
“Holy shit!” Parker says as he continues to stare down at the ultrasound image. “You’re pregnant…with my baby. How did this happen? You’re on the pill?”
I pick at my fingernails nervously as I try to calm the nervous butterflies swarming my stomach. “I had a stomach bug the week before you came to visit. I didn’t think of it until after my period was late two weeks ago. When I was sick I couldn’t keep anything down—kind of like right now.” I let out a nervous laugh before continuing, “Anyways. I realized that all that time I wasn’t just not keeping down my food but also my birth control pills. So for four days I didn’t take my pill and had no idea. I took it but wasn’t thinking that I was then getting sick soon after not giving my body time to consume it. Then you came and we had sex multiple times without protection and low and behold a few weeks later I’m revisiting the toilet every time I try to eat or smell food and notice I’m late. So I bought a test and saw the word ‘pregnant’ appear and I swear I thought I was going to pass out.”
“I think it’s safe to say that I’m pretty shocked at the moment, too. I can’t believe we’re going to have a baby. We don’t even live in the same state. How the hell are we going to do this?”
Tears begin to well up in my eyes and slowly, one by one they begin to fall as I think about being alone and pregnant. All I see when I close my eyes is that stupid envelope.
“I have no idea. I can’t do this alone, Parker. I need you,” I say in between sobs.
Hugging me tighter I feel his lips kiss me gently on the forehead and murmur, “We’ll figure out a way. I will promise you right now, you will not be in this alone. I love you and I’m going to love this baby with everything in me. At least we have a few months to try and figure out where we go from here.”
As we sit here watching the waves roll into the shore, the tide gets higher and the water comes almost to our toes, neither of us speak. I’m silently praying that since I opened up to him about that baby that he’d open up to me about the letter in his luggage.
Quickly those hopes begin to dwindle away as Parker suddenly climbs to his feet and takes my hand pulling me up to my feet beside him and asks me, “You ready to head back to the house?”
Brushing the sand off of my butt with my free hand I let out a soft sigh, “Yeah. I’m feeling pretty tired. I think I’m going to head straight to bed tonight.”
“If you need anything when we get back to the house let me know, okay? Maybe some soup and crackers will help settle your stomach before you go to sleep.”
I shake my head no as I walk slowly beside him, “No it’s okay, I think the safest thing for me is to avoid any food for the remainder of the night. I don’t think I can handle getting sick one more time this evening.”
The second we walk into the house Ashlynn looks up from the couch where she’s curled up beside Chase and as soon as she sees my tear streaked face a look of understanding flashes across her face.
I give her a weak smile before following Parker up the stairs and into our bedroom.
“Becca,” Parker’s voice is barely above a whisper as he turns and takes my face suddenly into his hands. I blink up at him still teary eyed and bite on my lip as I try to keep myself from falling apart.
“Yeah?”
“Please don’t cry. I hate seeing you upset when we should be happy right now. We made a baby. Sure, it wasn’t planned and it sure as hell was unexpected. But one thing that is for certain is that this baby was created out of love. It wasn’t some random one night stand. When we made him or her, we did so while I made love to you. I know it’s scary, but everything’s going to be okay.”
I’m emotionally and physically exhausted a
fter trying so hard to hide my pregnancy. I want to ask him about that letter, but I’m too tired to hash that out tonight also.
Instead I’m going to wait until tomorrow. No matter what, tomorrow he will tell me what is going on. I deserve to know. Especially now that if he’s enlisting into the Air Force it won’t only be affecting him and I, but our baby too.
Stripping out of my clothes I climb into bed in nothing but my panties and curl underneath the cool, crisp sheets. I thought Parker would head downstairs and join everyone in the living room since it’s only a little after ten at night, but surprisingly I feel him climb into bed and snuggle up behind me.
A tear falls from my eye and slides over the bridge of my nose as I feel his strong, warm hand come to rest over my belly as he spoons with me in bed.
“Goodnight, Becca…” His hand rubs small circles across my belly as he whispers, “and goodnight, lil’ baby Maclaren.” He kisses and sucks softly a path along my shoulder before dropping his head onto his pillow.
One thing I know for certain is that Parker is an amazing man. I love with my whole heart—even more so now that I have a part of him growing inside of me. Whatever he chooses to do with his life I’ll support him even if it terrifies me.
I want to feel like he loves and respects me enough that my opinion matters to him. Because if he decides to become an Airman and put his life on the line, I have a right to know this. Especially if he means it when he says that he wants to spend forever with me. Because now it’s not just forever with me—but forever with our baby, too.
Chapter Ten
Becca
“How did it go last night with Parker?” Ashlynn asks looking at me over her iced coffee.
Shrugging, I release my straw from between my teeth and give her a half smile. “It went pretty well. He said all the right things I wanted to hear, but the real test will come once we get back to our normal lives. I also found something in his suitcase yesterday. If it means what I think it does things are about to get even crazier before they get any better.”
Her curiosity is instantly peaked. “Do tell.”
“There was an envelope from the Air Force. To me it can only mean one thing, that Parker is going to follow in his father’s footsteps and join the military. Which I don’t understand because he had all these plans to get an internship with a big wig Politician in D.C. his dad was supposedly helping him get.”
“Holy crap. The Air Force!” Ashley shouts in a loud whisper as we try to make sure the boys hanging out in the pit box don’t hear us. “I can’t believe he’d make a decision that big without talking to you first.”
“I don’t know yet what he’s doing. Maybe he just contacted a recruiter and is planning on discussing it with me, but wanted to wait until the end of our vacation so we could spend the week enjoying each other not stressing over things that can wait until later to be talked about? I don’t know. It’s the only rational conclusion I can come up with. You wouldn’t think after talking about all of our plans for the future that he’d make a decision this huge without talking to me first?”
A racecar zips past us causing our hair to fly around our head as it pulls into an empty pit box a few feet away.
We’re hanging out at the Daytona Speedway watching the boys play with their toys as they take turns driving Chase’s racecar around the track. We haven’t told anyone yet about the baby, but Parker made it very clear when Chase suggested taking Ashlynn and I around the track that I would not be stepping foot inside a racecar.
Seeing him all protective definitely got my motor running. I’ve now spent the last twenty minutes sipping my iced coffee trying to cool myself down. The x-rated thoughts flooding my mind as we speak would make a porn star blush.
Sadly for Parker when we had sex this morning my breasts were so sensitive from just waking up that he couldn’t touch them at all. He tried to suck on them and without thinking I immediately reacted by smacking him hard in the arm as I screamed out in pain.
So there are a lot of down sides to pregnancy, but also a few upsides like my sex drive kicking into high gear. More so since having Parker around whenever the urge arises.
“This is all too crazy. Chase has to have known. I can’t imagine Parker making a decision this big and not telling at least his best friend about it. We’ve all been one big mess of secrets this time around. Talk about a total one-eighty from our beach vacation last summer to this one now for spring break. There’s just so much going on this time around. At least we’ve all had a pretty awesome time even with everything going on,” Ashlynn says, breaking me from my thoughts. I nod in agreement as I watch Parker slip his helmet onto his head and climb into the racecar.
“I’m a mess just thinking about him playing around in a race car for Christ sake! How the hell am I going to deal with knowing he’s in a fucking war zone?!”
Ashlynn shakes her head as her chest bounces from her trying to muffle her laughter. “I know, every time I watch Chase climb into that racecar with forty or so other cars racing alongside him its nerve wracking. So I understand that fear all too well. I think knowing that Parker would be in a war zone with the risk of never coming home would make me want to lock his ass in my basement—if I had a basement that is—and never let him ever leave the house. All these military spouses who deal with multiple deployments are the strongest people. I have no idea how they do it. So many have children, it’s literally like being a single parent. Also, I swear this kid is going come out cursing after listening to you ‘try’ to not swear over these next eight months,” she says, reaching out and rubbing my belly.
As soon as I ‘dropped my f-bomb’ like Ashlynn says, I cringe and cover my lips with my finger. I knew she’d call me out on it being the pain in the ass best friend that she is. “Oops I really need to get myself used to not swearing so much. I think I need to get one of those swear jars; maybe that’ll help me be a little more successful with getting my mommy mouth.” I joke before taking another sip of my coffee.
“I think that is exactly what you need, but I like the idea of every time you swear I get a quarter. Maybe if you see your money lining my purse, you’ll be more successful.”
“Whatever you say. But seriously, I need to know what you think I should do. Should I tell Parker I found the letter or wait and see if he tells me on his own?”
“It’s a tough situation. I say try to let him tell you himself, but if we get down to our last day here and he’s still hasn’t brought it up, then you should. But I think since he packed that paper in his luggage to bring here on vacation that means he’s planning on discussing it with you.”
I feel a little better as we leave the track. Talking with Ashlynn has helped me sort through the mix of emotions swarming inside of me at the moment.
Not long after all the guys have their turns doing a lap around the track and we get the full tour of the Speedway from Chase, we all head back to the condo. All of my other friends who came to Daytona with us this week are hanging out on the beach partying. Music is blasting and there’s coolers full of beer lining the beach beside the rows of beach chairs.
We’re having a huge beach bash tonight, and thankfully we all agreed that everyone is to stay outside. I don’t want strangers wondering around inside an expensive beach house we are responsible for.
“Do you want to tell everyone before the party starts?” Parker asks as he climbs into a lawn chair and I get myself comfortable sitting on his lap, relishing in the feeling of his arms wrapped around my waist. His hands come to rest once again at my stomach. I’m laying on him in nothing but my bikini and watch in amazement as his large hands come to rest on my belly, covering every single inch of it.
It’s hard to believe there’s a baby in there and that soon enough I’ll start to have a tiny baby bump where my abs are right now.
Cheering is definitely going to be out of the picture now that a baby is in there. If I’m lucky maybe they’ll let me still cheer even if I can’t do all the stunts
I normally do. I can so rock a cheer uniform with a baby bump.
“I think it’s a perfect time to tell them, seeing as we have everyone together right now. It’ll also make refusing alcohol a whole hell of a lot easier.”
The smile on Parker’s face is contagious. Within seconds I’m smiling so hard that my cheeks are aching. For right now, I’m letting all my worries fade into the back of my mind and I’m going to enjoy my last few days with him to the fullest. We’ll tackle the other issues that need to be discussed before we head back to college when we have time to sit down and truly hash everything out, without any distractions like drunk people running up and down the halls, or deciding it’s a good idea to go streaking through my bedroom.
“Hey everyone! Can we get y’alls attention for just one moment? We have an announcement to make.” All eyes turn to us as Parker’s voice carries across the beach. Satisfied with the number of people paying attention, Parker rubs my belly and shouts along with me, “We’re having a baby!”
Within seconds we’re surrounded by all of our friends as everyone congratulates us. A few of my girlfriends hang around asking how I’m feeling, when I’m due, and what our plans are now that a baby is on the way.
I answer every question honestly, even though our future is up in the air as for where we go from here.
“We need to discuss where we’ll go from here since I go to school in Georgia and he lives in Charlotte. He graduates in two months so we’ll have a better idea on what we’ll do before the baby comes after he finishes school in May. Our overall goal is to have a home just for the two of us to bring our baby home to once he or she is born. I couldn’t care less where we end up, as long as we end up there together.”
A feeling of content washes over me as I gaze up at him and see the excitement twinkling in his eyes. I know Parker is going to do everything in his power to be here for me and the baby, that is one thing I do know for sure.
