by Daisy James
‘What are you thinking about?’ asked Josh, slumping down on the sofa next to her and putting his feet up on the coffee table.
‘Just how much I’ve enjoyed being a part of everything today and how much I’ll miss it all when I go back to London.’
‘You could stay,’ he ventured.
‘No, I couldn’t. My work is in London. Sometimes I have to be at the studio for five a.m. There’s no way I could commute. And then there’s the late-night meetings when we’re making last-minute amendments to the next day’s show. I have to be in London.’
‘You could live there during the week and come down on the weekends?’
‘I could, but don’t forget I teach the drama school kids on Saturday mornings. But you do have a point. I need to make sure I spend more time here. I want to help Livie settle in at Bramble Cottage and I want to see Ethan grow up. So I’ll make sure I get down here at least once a month from now on. It’ll be hard to watch the changes Miles intends to make to the pub, though.’
‘Ah, yes, our friend the Marvellous Mr Miles Morgan.’
‘Why don’t you like him?’
‘Don’t trust the guy, Kirst. Just something about him that buzzes at my warning antennae.’
Kirstie just smiled. She didn’t want to enter into a full-blown character assassination of Miles. She liked him and had found they had a great deal in common. She didn’t want to find herself blurting out about his New Year’s Eve invitation, which would inevitably put a dampener on what had been such a good day.
‘So when are contracts being signed?’
‘Friday. Livie and I have an appointment with the solicitors first thing on Friday morning and then I’m scooting back up to London for my meeting with Brad to go through the plans I have for Kirstie’s Kitchen in the new year. I’m going to spend all day tomorrow researching ideas for healthy recipes for those who want to lose the extra pounds they gained at Christmas or want to stick to their resolutions to lead a healthier lifestyle.’
‘I know it’s going to be a difficult task, but don’t you think you should start packing? You don’t need me to tell you how much stuff there is to go through.’
‘Ergh, you’re right. I’ve definitely been avoiding it. I’m going to start as soon as Livie gets back. We need to decide what we absolutely have to keep – only the stuff we can’t bear to part with. Then, we’re going to ask Angus to take what he thinks he can sell at auction and give the rest to charity – it’ll be a little bit of poetic justice that most of Mum and Dad’s beloved items are going back to Angus’s showroom or the local charity shops, which is where they originated in the first place. Re-recycling! The money we raise can go to pay off the debts and I think we’ll break even after Livie has bought the cottage.’
‘What do you plan on doing with your share?’
‘Nothing. I’ll just keep it until I decide where I want to buy a place. Whatever cash we get won’t be enough to buy anywhere in London, but I know there’ll always be a place for me at Livie and Harry’s.’
A sudden spasm of fear gnawed at her gut. When the pub was sold the last physical link to her parents would be severed. A vision of herself floating aimlessly in the clouds looking down on a busy world came into her mind and she felt so alone.
Why had she made such a mess of her life? What if things could have been different? What if her parents were still merrily serving Sauvignon Blanc behind the bar at the Dancing Duck? What would she be doing then? What if she hadn’t gone to stay with Millie in London, but instead stayed on in Cranbury and waited for Josh to come back from his solo trip? She knew with absolute certainty that had she done so she would still be with him. Maybe they would even be married like Olivia and Harry.
Regret clawed at her throat with such tenacity she had to excuse herself from Josh’s comfortable sofa and go in search of the bathroom.
Chapter 24
Kirstie spent the whole of Boxing Day on her laptop at the pine table in the kitchen, researching ideas for Kirstie’s Kitchen Kick-Start. She had amassed a whole sheaf of notes and ideas to present to Brad when she met him on Friday. She intended to showcase nutritious, diet-conscious yet delicious recipes from around the world to illustrate how the French, Italians, Japanese, and even the Americans cut down on calories or maintained a more healthy lifestyle.
One of the elements she was particularly keen to persuade Brad to feature was the use of locally sourced ingredients when they covered the UK version. She had devoured numerous blogs featuring the use of food grown on rooftops and even in the cellars of buildings around the capital.
She also had a list of the chefs she wanted to invite to demonstrate the recipes and as soon as she got the green light she would start ringing around to check on their availability. A curl of excitement climbed through her chest as the project gelled and she couldn’t wait to get back to the studio to talk to Brad about it.
By the time eight o’clock came around she was starving, having skipped breakfast and lunch. She remembered that Leon and Michel were enjoying a well-earned day off so she made do with a frozen pizza and surprised herself by indulging in one of the ubiquitous mince pies made all the more moreish with a glass of her favourite Chianti.
She was really looking forward to seeing her sister the next day. She cast her eyes over to the pile of wrapped gifts on the countertop and a spasm of joy ignited in her heart as she anticipated their reunion.
Recalling her mother’s oft-used phrase when she wanted them to go to bed early, she decided to have an early night so that the next day came quicker. It was no hardship; she was so exhausted from the whirlwind of activity over the last three days that she knew the sleep demons would not stalk her path to a dreamless sleep that night.
***
‘Oh, Kirstie. It’s so lovely to be back!’ sobbed Olivia when they greeted each other on the doorstep where Kirstie had been loitering for at least half an hour. The last vestiges of the snow had melted and left behind a grey drizzle-filled sky brightened only by the arrival of her beloved sister, brother-in-law, and nephew.
Kirstie reached over and hooked her arm through the handle of Ethan’s car seat. She dropped a kiss on his forehead and carried him up to the flat whilst Olivia struggled with the huge Cath Kidston canvas bag that went everywhere with her. Harry was left to sort out the suitcases and a huge black sack filled with the Christmas presents Ethan’s doting grandparents had showered on him. Harry’s freckled face showed the signs of fatigue from the trauma of the last two weeks.
‘How’s George?’
‘Improving every day. The physio sessions are organized and Mum’s got him on a strict diet, which unfortunately did not include his annual cigar on Christmas Day. You should have heard his complaints. Dad’s enjoyed the best cigar Cuba can offer every Christmas Day for fifty years apparently! I’ll just drop these in the bedroom and be right with you.’
Kirstie followed Harry into their bedroom to collect Ethan’s present. She had managed to cover it in electric blue wrapping paper, which she knew he would love. She waited, cross-legged, on the rug in the living room until they were all together.
‘Happy Christmas!’
‘Happy Christmas, darling!’ Olivia smiled, leaning forward to kiss her.
Ethan shrieked his acknowledgement from his play mat and they all laughed. Olivia picked him up and balanced him on her knee, encouraging him to rip the brightly coloured paper away from his gift.
‘Oh, Ethan, look! It’s a tricycle! Thanks, Kirstie. I can just see him riding around the garden at Bramble Cottage in the summer.’
‘That’s what I thought.’
‘Ah, Kirstie, thanks for the cufflinks. They are amazing. Perfect.’ Harry deposited a kiss on her curls. ‘Are they a Bijoux Baubles design, by any chance?’
‘They are.’
‘She is certainly a talented woman, our Emma Finch. I saw some of her pieces in the gift shop up at Craiglea Hall. I hope that means her business is beginning to take off. She deserves i
t.’
‘She does, Harry. Okay, now this is for both you. Sorry I couldn’t wrap it.’
Kirstie handed Olivia the makeshift montage of photographs of the peppermint-and-cream garden seat that she would arrange to have delivered when they had settled into their new home.
‘Oh, Kirstie, that’s gorgeous. You are thoughtful. Now Harry and I will have somewhere to sit while we watch Ethan ride his tricycle.’
Harry moved into the kitchen to set the kettle to boil to make Ethan’s bottles before he started demanding to be fed. Kirstie smiled across at her sister and passed her a small, elegantly wrapped package that she had bought at the beginning of December from her favourite shop in London.
‘Another present? I’m being spoilt! Thanks, Kirstie, and this is for you from all of us. I hope you’ll use it.’
Kirstie watched her sister tear away of the shiny silver paper and open the lid of the iconic turquoise box.
‘Aw, Kirst. You shouldn’t have. Thank you, thank you. It’s beautiful. Look, Harry. Kirstie bought me a Tiffany heart necklace.’ Tears collected along Olivia’s lower lashes as she extracted the silver chain from the box and held it at her neck for Harry to fasten. ‘I love you, Kirstie.’
‘Love you too, Livie.’
Now it was Kirstie’s turn. She glanced at the gold envelope in her hand before sliding her fingernail under the flap. She had no idea what her sister had bought her. She extracted the thick cream rectangle of card edged in gold and read the words etched in curly writing.
‘Oh, Livie, I …’ She reached forward and hugged Olivia so tight all the air was squeezed from her lungs and she was left gasping for breath and words. She swallowed down the maelstrom of emotions that threatened to spill out. ‘You shouldn’t have to buy me an annual subscription to a leisure spa to make me come down and visit you.’
But as soon as she said it she realized with a heavy dose of guilt that that was exactly what Olivia and Harry had thought they had to do. She read the words on the card again. A year’s premium membership to the Craiglea Hall gym, swimming pool, and health spa. Now, whenever she needed a break or a pamper day to ease her aching bones and her flagging spirits she only had to hop on the train to relax at the five-star facilities and stay overnight at her sister’s tiny cottage. Who could resist that?
‘Thank you,’ she whispered, determined there and then that she would use it regularly, to appreciate the gesture and sentiment behind it to make changes to her life and how she had chosen to live it over the last two years. She was blessed with an amazing family, and loyal and supportive friends who were still by her side cheering her on despite her disappearance. She had a lot to be grateful for.
‘Coffee?’ offered Harry, depositing a cafetière on the coffee table. ‘Come on, young man. Time for your nap,’ and Ethan was whisked away to his bedroom clutching the oversized stuffed giraffe in his hands.
‘So, tell me all about the Christmas Craft Contest and the Big Christmas Baking Bash?’ said Olivia.
‘Both went really well. Mostly thanks to your incomparable organizational skills, I’ll admit. We had everything we needed for the table decorations for Reverend Clarke’s Christmas lunch and more than enough to feed the five thousand at the dinner. It was a huge shock when the church hall flooded but it turned out to be a blessing in disguise because everyone said it gave them a chance to say goodbye to this old place before it got stripped of its character.’
‘I’m glad. I did think about arranging a farewell party, but it seemed so sad and depressing I couldn’t face it. You ready to sign the contracts on Friday?’
‘I am. But I feel very ambivalent about it. One minute I know it’s the best and only thing to do and that we have better things waiting around the corner that will make both of us happy. It’s the chance for a fresh start, new challenges without the finances to worry about. But then the next minute, I feel desolate, like the safety net is being cut from under my feet and I’m left dangling into nothingness.’
‘I understand how you feel. I feel like that too sometimes, but I remind myself that I have Harry and Ethan, and of course you. And you have Josh.’
‘I don’t really. Okay, we’ve made our peace with each other, and don’t get me wrong I feel much better for having done so. But there can’t be a future for us.’
‘Why not? I thought you said you shared a kiss.’
Heat suffused Kirstie’s cheeks. ‘We did. But we lead such different lives now, Livie. I live in London where every spare second of my time is taken up with either the show or the drama school. It wouldn’t be a real relationship even if I came down to Cranbury every Saturday night. That’s not fair on either of us. And who knows what Josh will be doing when The Duck closes for refurbishment. I know for a fact that he won’t work for Miles – says he doesn’t trust him – so he could end up working anywhere.’
‘Okay, Kirst, it’s your decision, but for what it’s worth Josh loves you, always has, and in my book that can overcome any obstacle in its way.’
‘He’s asleep, bless him,’ said Harry dragging his fingers through his ginger hair. ‘Okay, girls. Whilst I have you together I need to discuss something with you. I’ve been giving it a lot of thought over the last two weeks and have come up with a proposal. Callum and Greg have offered to help us out with the packing. It’s a mammoth task and we can’t possibly think of tackling it all ourselves. I hope you don’t mind but I’ve accepted their offer.’
‘Oh, Harry, that’s very generous of them.’ Again Kirstie was overwhelmed by their friends’ kindness and willingness to give up their time to help. ‘I have to admit it’s something I’ve been dreading doing but I have been thinking about it as well. I thought we could start by deciding what we absolutely have to keep, then we can separate the rest into things that are suitable for auction and things that can go to charity?’
‘I agree,’ said Olivia, fiddling with the handle of her coffee cup.
‘Well, we need to get started because Callum and Greg have the day off work tomorrow but are back on Thursday, so how do you feel about making a start in the morning? We can store the things we can’t bear to part with in Greg’s garage until we complete on the purchase of the cottage and we just need to ask Angus to come over with his van for the rest when we’re ready.’
‘Sound like a plan,’ muttered Kirstie. Her stomach clenched as she realized it couldn’t be put off any longer. She had to face the task of dismantling her parents’ lives once and for all.
Chapter 25
‘Come on, let’s get started,’ urged a beaming Emma from the top of the stairs. This morning her blonde hair had been piled on the top of her head in a messy topknot and her wrists jangled with myriad silver bangles sporting multi-coloured glass beads.
‘Okay, okay. I’ll catch you up in a minute.’ Kirstie lingered in the kitchen whilst Olivia and Harry carried Ethan downstairs in his bouncy chair for Rachel’s mum to enjoy a fun-filled morning session of building bricks and reading stories whilst they got on with sorting out the packing. As soon as they were on the bottom step Kirstie called down after them, ‘I just want to give Brad a quick call to finalize our meeting on Friday. How long do you think it will take to sign the contracts at the solicitors?’
‘An hour at the most,’ said Olivia. ‘We should be finished by ten-thirty at the latest. You can catch the eleven o’clock train from Salisbury up to Waterloo and you should be at the studio by two.’
‘Okay.’
Kirstie dialled Brad’s number and waited. It rang for a while and then switched to voicemail. Strange, she thought. Usually his phone only rang a couple of times before going to voicemail. She shoved her phone in the pocket of her jeans and made her way back to the top of the stairs before pausing and deciding to send him a text.
Looking forward to meeting up on Friday. Is two p.m. okay? Got lots of ideas to bounce around. Kirstie.
A tickle of unease invaded her chest. She had only been away for two weeks but it felt like an etern
ity and she was itching to throw herself into a fresh challenge. Yet, until she spoke to Brad she couldn’t dispel the feeling of agitation. She glanced out of the kitchen window at the walled garden at the rear of the pub.
Now that the summerhouse was no longer piled high with cardboard boxes she could see the huge gas barbecue her father had treated as one of his best friends, pressing it into service whenever he could in the summer months for customers who wanted a burger with their Sunday afternoon pint. With her mother’s encouragement, he had even branched out into Thai chicken and red pepper skewers and lamb and mint kebabs.
‘Kirstie? You still up there?’ called Olivia.
‘Coming.’
‘Everything okay?’ asked her sister, peering closely at her.
‘Sure. Where shall we start?’ Kirstie refused to add to what was going to be a very difficult day for Olivia. She would keep quiet about her apprehension over Brad’s uncharacteristic unavailability.
‘I thought we could start with the summerhouse and the barn. Then, if there’s any time left, move on to the loft. We need to keep the bar and restaurant until last so that the customers don’t get worried. And, Kirstie, I intend to be ruthless. There’s not enough space in the cottage for all of Ethan’s baby paraphernalia, never mind taking a potpourri of Mum and Dad’s life with us as well.’
‘I agree. I’ve got even less room at my flat.’
‘Okay, now that’s clear, off we go for a long day of hard work at the Harrison Life Laundry.’
‘Morning, Kirstie. Hey, are you okay? You look like you just jumped off a mortician’s slab,’ said Josh from behind a huge cardboard box he had rescued from the Old Barn, spilling out old issues Good Housekeeping magazine as he went.
‘Thanks, Josh. Always did know how to cheer a girl up.’
Josh grinned in reply.
‘We’d better get a move on,’ said Olivia, hooking her arm through Kirstie’s and leading her into the walled garden. ‘There’s so much stuff it’s going to take us all week to get through it. The boys look like they’ve got a handle on the barn, so why don’t we do the summerhouse?’
