by Joy Elbel
“Drake! I’ve missed you! Without you here, there’s no one around to help me keep Boone in line!” “I have a feeling that he has his hands full with you too!” Drake placed Rachel back on the ground and turned his eyes toward me. “And you must be Ruby. Boone told me you were hot but he didn’t do you justice. Love the hair by the way,” he said pointing to that one stray lock of red hair that managed to escape the confines of my wig. He gave me a less boisterous hug and a pat on the back.
What? Wow. I didn’t believe a word he was saying but it sure was nice to hear. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t crushing on Drake in even the slightest way. It was just that Zach used to compliment me daily and I sort of got used to it. Since the breakup, I’d kinda been going through withdrawal. Hearing compliments from this serious hottie was a much needed boost to my self-esteem. But much needed or not, it still made me blush. When I gathered my bearings, I tucked that lock of bright red hair back where it belonged.
“Hey, Rachel, do you think Crimson would want to talk to me? I feel really bad about everything that happened between us. But I still miss her, you know? Do you think there’s a chance she might want to make peace and be friends or something?”
“No, I don’t—leave it alone Drake.” Rachel gave him a look of warning. “It’s not a good idea.” Drake didn’t take her not so subtle hint. “Maybe after the party I’ll stop and say hi—maybe take her out for a burger or something.”
Crimson reclaimed her spot at the microphone and called for Rachel to come over. Before she walked away, Rachel shot Drake one last threatening glance. “I’m warning you—it’s a bad idea.”
Rachel dragged me over to the microphone with her. “Attention everyone, attention.” The room quieted slowly until everyone was silent.
“The next dance will be the masquerade dance.” She held up two bags for everyone to see. “In these bags are masks. Once you get your mask, you have to find the lucky guy or girl whose mask matches yours—they will be your partner for the next dance. Good luck and I hope everyone has fun.”
Rachel handed me the bag from her right hand. “Walk around the room and let every boy pick from your bag—I’ll get the girls.”
Well at least if I was helping her out, I wouldn’t have to actually participate in such foolish nonsense. Knowing my luck, I would get paired with the school loser. Oh wait, I was the school loser. Looks like I was dancing alone after all.
I made my way around the room until I gave out the last mask, then I returned to the microphone where Rachel was waiting for me. “Now when you find your match, stand against the wall so that everyone knows you’re already taken.
The dance floor turned to sheer chaos as girls and boys both searched for their matches. It was fun to watch the reactions—the “Yay, I wanted to dance with you!” looks from some and the “Oh, do I really have to dance with you?” looks from others. I was enjoying myself for the first time tonight so something was bound to burst my bubble.
“Here’s yours, Ruby—go get your man!” She handed me a glittery silver mask framed with gray feathers. “Wait, no…I don’t want to dance with anyone.” I tried to hand it back to her but she wouldn’t take it. “It’s just one dance, Ruby. What could happen?”
What could happen? Plenty. I was the queen of what could happen. The princess of unexpected surprises. Maybe I would get lucky and my partner would bolt for the restroom when he saw we were a match.
I slipped the mask over my eyes and roamed the dance floor like a total moron. Couple after couple slid to the side leaving fewer possible choices until I was the only one left standing alone. I was right—whoever he was, he ran when he saw it was me. How embarrassing was that? And at my own party, too?
Maybe no one would notice. Maybe I could slink back to the makeshift stage and hang out with the band instead. Excellent idea. It felt like everyone was staring straight at me as I turned to run away. When I saw who was behind me, I knew why they were staring.
He was the most beautiful Norse god I’d ever laid eyes on. No, really he was a Norse god—actually a Viking to be more precise. There behind me stood Zach Mason dressed in a costume that matched mine perfectly and wearing the same silver mask I was.
Fate was cruel. What was he doing here anyway? Where was Chloe? Dancing with him was out of the question. He hated me and he was dating someone else. I loved him but I was a danger to him. I mumbled something even I couldn’t quite make out and started to walk away.
But before I could escape, he caught my hand in his and I felt that same jolt of energy pulse between us that I felt on the day I met him, the day I truly fell in love with him. I should have just broken his grasp and hurried away. But I didn’t. Instead, I turned to look at him. Mesmerized by how blue his eyes looked behind that frame of silver, I stood motionless as the music began to play.
29. The Man Behind the Mask
Ruby is going to be so mad at me. I’ll be lucky if I’m not in a full body cast by the end of the night. I lay down on my bed and stared at the ceiling while I ran through the plan in my head. Rachel was a genius and an evil one at that, but I was more nervous now than the day I first met Ruby. At least when she ran away from me way back then, I was able to walk away without ever really knowing what I was missing. Now, that was impossible. I loved her so much I thought I might go crazy if I had to live the rest of my life without her. Hell, I was probably already insane if I thought this plan would work.
Ruby was the only thing I could think about. Well, one of two things—the other thing being how damn itchy my arm was in that stupid cast. Only two more weeks to go with that thing but I wanted to get out the hack saw and chop it right off. At least I was out of the neck brace finally. There was no way in hell I would have tried to win her back when I looked like freaking Frankenstein.
There was so much I needed to say to Ruby, so many things I needed to explain or apologize for. Why couldn’t I have just said the words a long time ago? It would have saved us both a lot of drama. Of course, we probably still would have broken up because it was what she felt she needed to do. And honestly, I kind of needed it, too. But once she realized that I knew her secret, maybe she would turn to me for help instead of pushing me away.
The party didn’t start until six but I would have to be at the mansion by five if I was going to sneak in without her seeing me. I don’t know how she did it, but Rachel even got Shelly and Dr. Matthews to help with this plan. I owed them some major apologies, too. My actions hurt Ruby— unintentionally, of course—and I needed to take responsibility for that. I was only seventeen but it was time to stand up and be a man.
I took a look at the Halloween costume hanging on my closet door. It wasn’t exactly what I would have picked out for myself but I decided to trust Rachel’s judgment on this one. She made me try on a thousand different costumes that day. I wanted to go with the Little Red Riding Hood/Big Bad Wolf theme. There was something about the thought of Ruby in that Little Red costume that got me hot in the worst way. But I guess Rachel was right. If I really wanted Ruby back, I was going have to go for charming and romantic not furry and beastly.
How did I mess things up so badly? I had a beautiful, funny, intelligent girlfriend who thought I was amazing and I went and screwed it up by not telling her how I really felt. She knew I loved her—I told her every day that I did—but what she didn’t know was how much I wanted her. Wanted all of her. It was easy to talk about sex with her over the summer when I knew it wasn’t really an option. But once we were free to do anything—and everything—we wanted, I got scared. Really scared. Our relationship got so intense so fast and I just couldn’t handle it. I was so confused. It was like I was afraid to lose her but afraid to have her, too.
There were so many ways that it could go wrong. What if I wasn’t any good at? What if my…um…equipment wasn’t satisfactory? I’d seen a lot in the locker room in my time and I thought I was more than sufficient, but what did I know? Sure, I watched some porn at Boone’s house when we were yo
unger and his parents weren’t home, but I was pretty sure they weren’t good examples for how it was supposed to be. If I really thought all it would take was going to her house and pretending to be there to fix the cable or something, life would be much easier. No, things had to be perfect for her— she deserved nothing less.
There were bigger issues to think about, too. What if I hurt her? Or worse yet, got her pregnant? If I knocked her up it would ruin her life. That was the last thing I ever wanted to do. Of course, if it did happen I would stand beside her 100% regardless of the consequences. I wasn’t crazy about the idea of abortion but I’d never even held a baby before. I would make a rotten father. God, was I over thinking everything? Maybe, but she would be counting on me to have all of the bases covered and I couldn’t let her down.
I even bought a box of condoms so I would be prepared. They were still under the mattress where I hid them that day. All except one which I used for practice, shall we say, so I wouldn’t look like a complete idiot when the time came to use them for real and I couldn’t even put one on. I knew they were well hidden but I still got nervous every time Mom came into my room for something. They were like the Tell-Tale Heart beating under the floorboards or something.
My number one concern, though, was for my own heart. It wasn’t beating inside my chest anymore. I tied it up with a red ribbon and placed it in her hands months ago. What would happen if we had sex and she decided to dump me for some reason? I could barely breathe without her now, how much worse would I feel if we broke up after we got closer? Once we went all the way, I would be hopelessly in love with her forever—I knew that for a fact. Misty broke my heart but Ruby had the power to literally destroy it.
In a fit of frustration, I beat my un-casted fist against the bed. Why did things have to be so complicated? I loved her and she loved me—shouldn’t that be enough? Shouldn’t our lives be perfect as long as we had each other? After what we went through together over the summer, I thought all of the tough times were behind us. All I needed was an opportunity to talk to her—alone and uninterrupted. Once I laid it all out in the open, I was sure she would take me back. But if she didn’t, I had no idea of what to do next.
I dug into my pocket and pulled out the small box inside. I sat up and flipped open the lid. There sat the ring I was going to give Ruby the night she turned into a raging seductress. When I decided to ask her for a commitment of sorts, I knew I had to back it up with a symbol. I had no idea what kind of ring I wanted to give her. All I knew was it had to be special. Since my financial situation wasn’t the greatest, I couldn’t afford some big fancy diamond and I was pretty sure that wasn’t exactly her style anyway. And besides, diamonds say “marry me”. What I was looking for was something more along the lines of “promise to stay with me until I’m finished with college and it’s time to start thinking about marriage”. I certainly wasn’t ready yet, but I wanted her to still be around when I was.
Lucky for me, Nancy, the lady at Brody’s Jewelry, knew exactly what I needed. She asked me a handful of questions about Ruby and came up with the design for the perfect ring for my perfect girl. The band was silver—Ruby hated gold—and the setting was a cluster of red stones arranged in the form of a rose. It was beautiful and unique— just like Ruby. I was so excited to give it to her that night. But I never got that far.
Honestly, if I’d given her the ring first and then she wanted to have sex, I wouldn’t have said no. I would have literally run home, grabbed the box of condoms—yes, the whole box—and it would have been game on. It might sound weird, but I’m kinda glad things happened the way they did.
She deserved something better than uncontrollable hormones in the backseat of my car. I wanted to plan it out— make it perfect. It wasn’t for my benefit, it was for hers. I mean, I did have some standards—I wasn’t a complete ass. It’s not like I would have tried to get some under the bleachers during the game or anything. But that backseat would have been just fine for me. As long as it was with her, I would have been happy.
But for Ruby, I wanted to make it everything she probably dreamed it would be. Flowers, candles—all of those romantic things girls went crazy over. I wanted it to be at Rosewood—in her room, in her bed. I figured she would be more comfortable that way. Plus, every time she slept in that bed she would think of me and what we did there together. That was the important part—for her to think about me as much as I thought about her.
But of course, I was a complete idiot and ruined things by not telling her what I wanted. Oh, if she only knew how crazy she made me. But she didn’t. Instead, she had some insane idea in her head that I wasn’t physically attracted to her. She couldn’t be further from the truth.
If she could only see and feel things from my perspective for one day, she would know how bad I wanted her. And how bad those feelings scared me. But I was an all or nothing kind of guy. Anything beyond kissing and I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to stop if she asked me to. So I was the perfect gentleman when we were together. Oh, but once I got home it was a different story.
If I spent any more time alone in the bathroom, I would be in danger of breaking my other arm, too. I couldn’t help it—if I didn’t get it out of my system I was afraid I would literally explode. There wasn’t a single part of her that didn’t get me hot.
Her skin was so soft—just one touch was enough to set me off. And when her hair brushed against my face, it felt like the flutter of an angel’s wing. And that perfume! Every once in a while I would let Rachel win an argument she was clearly losing as a way to thank her for telling Ruby how much I loved that scent. But even without all of that, she would still be sexy.
The way she looked at me, the way she laughed when I made a stupid joke—there wasn’t anything about her that I didn’t love. Especially the way she said my name—why did it sound so different when it came from her lips? I almost texted her a goodnight “mwah” every night since our breakup but each time found the strength to refrain. A simple “mwah” wouldn’t make up for the things I did to her.
Four o’clock. I got so caught up in just thinking about Ruby that I didn’t even think about how I was going to get her back tonight. Lucky for me, I would have some time alone at the mansion while I waited for her to get home from work—I would think about it then. Right now, I needed to get a shower and transform myself into a Viking prince. And lately, my showers ended up being one of two things: extra-long or extra cold. Tonight was a long, warm shower kind of night. I couldn’t walk in there a raging ball of hormones, now could I?
I still had a smile on my face even after I was dressed and en route to Rosewood. That Little Red Riding Hood fantasy sure went a long way, I tell ya. There were only a few vehicles parked outside when I got there and I recognized every one of them. Boone’s sports car, Drake’s even more expensive sports car, and a van with NeverMore’s black and red raven logo painted on the side. I pulled up to the front of the mansion and Dr. Matthews came out to meet me. My leg started to quiver uncontrollably.
Deep breath. Her dad was nice but he still frightened me. After all, it was his little girl that I fantasized about every night. He was a guy—he had to remember what it was like to be seventeen. He had to know what kind of thoughts ran through my head when I kissed her. If he only knew that Ruby took her shirt off for me in the car that night, I think he would have met me with a shotgun instead of a smile.
“Over here, Zach,” he said pointing to the garage. Was that where he kept his shotguns? No, he was a doctor—he didn’t take lives, he saved them. Hoping that the Hippocratic Oath extended far beyond the hospital, I started to get out of the car.
But Dr. Matthews shook his head no. “I’m going to open up the garage door so you can park in there. You know she’ll spot your car immediately if you leave it out here anywhere.”
Once my car was safely out of sight, I sat in my car for a few seconds to rehearse an apology in my head. I was lucky that he was giving me a second chance. Please, let Ruby do the sam
e.
“Dr. Matthews,” I said, my voice cracking under the pressure, “Can I talk to you for a minute?”
“Sure, Zach, what’s on your mind?” I followed him outside and waited nervously while he closed the garage door. It would have been easier to say what I needed to say while his back was turned but I waited for him to finish anyway. If I was going to be a man, I had to apologize face to face. As he turned to look at me, I had some serious doubts about this whole “being a man” thing.
“I want to say I’m sorry about hurting Ruby that day.” So much for being a man. Just the thought of her with her face covered in blood from the accidental blow I delivered caused me to choke up with emotion. “I didn’t mean to hurt her!”
In my head, this whole conversation went so differently. I apologized calmly and in an adult manner and he accepted with the same dignity. Instead, I was a blubbering idiot about to cry in front of his ex-girlfriend’s father. No father wanted his daughter to date a cry baby.
Dr. Matthews placed his hand on my shoulder and looked directly into my eyes. “I know you didn’t, Zach. But you need to get your anger under control—she wasn’t seriously hurt but she could have been. And what about the next time it happens, did you consider that?”
I swallowed my emotions and stood up straight. I had to prove to him just how serious I was about changing. “You’re right, Dr. Matthews, and I’m working on it—I swear. I joined an anger management group sponsored by your hospital and I’m learning a lot about myself.”
There was something else I had to say that scared the crap out of me but I had to say it. “I’m in love with your daughter and I’ll do anything I have to do to deserve her love in return.” There, I said it. I told her dad I loved her. Even though I was nervous as hell, somehow at least those words came out perfectly, confidently.
