by Susan Bliler
Closing the distance, he pressed his nose to her warm chest and slowly dragged his tongue up the cut, laving her wound even as he felt her tremble.
Goddamn, she tasted so fucking good! He licked her again and then it was his turn to smile as the knife clattered to the floor. Her hand lifted, fisting his hair and forcing his mouth closer. Gentleman that he was he obliged.
Cersi’s body was bowing now, and Tyson had to wrap one arm around her waist to anchor her in place. His free hand lifted and curled around the nape of her neck to hold her in place as he continued to lap at her skin, his nose nudging her shirt over so he could get access to her breasts.
“Uhhh…I can come back.”
Cersi jerked in his hold, her eyes slamming open.
Pulling away just a fraction, Tyson glared over his arm at Noah and snarled, “Do that.”
“No!” Cersi was shoving him off of her now. Stepping away from him, she straightened her shirt and offered Noah a brittle smile. “I…I just cut myself is all.”
“Oh!” Noah hurried through the kitchen, stepping between them to get to the sink where he bent and pulled out a first aid kit that he settled on the counter next to Cersi’s coffee.
Over Noah’s bent form, Tyson and Cersi stared at each other.
“Here we go!” Noah stood, interrupting their view of each other before he turned and faced Cersi with an opened band-aid. “Where at?”
Tyson grinned when Cersi blushed. “I can do it.” She reached for the band-aid, but Noah jerked it back.
“Let me help. I got you, Cers.”
Pressing her lips together on a sigh, she pulled the top of her shirt open.
“Oh.” Noah stilled a moment before his tongue poked out when he leaned forward and used his fingers to spread the opening in Cersi’s shirt wider.
That fast, Tyson’s grin was gone. With one hard shove, Noah and his goddamn band-aid flew across the kitchen.
“Hey!” Noah barked as he hit the furthest wall, annoyance bunching his brow as he held up a thumb that still had the band-aid stuck to it. “I was just trying to help!”
Tyson reached into the first aid kit and pulled out his own band-aid. “Don’t.” He opened the band-aid and probably made too much contact with his knuckles on Cersi’s skin as he applied it, but oh well. When he was finished, he shot Noah a dark look and growled, “Don’t ever touch.”
“It’s like that?”
Tyson dipped his chin once.
“She ain’t even wearing your mark, man!”
That pissed Tyson off. Grabbing Cersi’s hip, he shoved her behind him and turned to face Noah. “You challenging me for her?”
Before Noah could answer, Cersi bellowed, “Oh good Christ, stop!”
She stepped out from behind Tyson and shot him a dark look as she took her coffee and left the kitchen. “No one’s challenging for me, and there’s no way in hell anyone is marking me.” She brushed past Noah. “Have a good day, boys.”
Chapter 21
Beating feet out of the kitchen, Cersi considered retreating upstairs but opted to head for the den where she heard voices. She didn’t trust herself to be alone with Tyson if he followed her, not that she expected him to.
Concentrating on not spilling her coffee, she wondered what in the hell she’d just been doing. Taunting. She’d been teasing Tyson and his Monster because…well because she’d spent a restless night thinking about what they’d done in his cabin. She hadn’t slept a damn wink because she’d been all hot and bothered by what they’d shared and then she’d been all hot under the collar about how he’d treated her after. Mostly, she lay awake wondering if he’d sneak into her room at some point during the night. He hadn’t, and in the morning she’d been equal parts relieved and dejected.
“Hey!” Vesa greeted from where she sat on Haddix’s lap.
Christ! Did they ever stop touching?
Dropping onto the couch across from them, Cersi faced the fire and sipped her coffee. She only got one swallow down when Tyson stepped into the room. Carrying his own mug of coffee, he strolled casually into the room and dropped onto the end of the sofa opposite her.
Pushing to her feet, she declared, “I’m going for a walk.”
Vesa looked from Cersi to Tyson curiously before saying, “I’ll come.”
Vesa was already pushing up from Haddix’s lap when Cersi held up her hand. “No…no, thanks.”
Vesa looked between Cersi and Tyson again.
A twinge of guilt speared through Cersi as Vesa lowered herself back onto Haddix’s lap, but Vesa knew Cersi liked her space, her private time.
“Be back soon.” She could feel Tyson’s eyes on her but didn’t even bother glancing at him as she made her way out of the room.
***
Tyson watched Cersi slip out of the den after rejecting Vesa’s offer of companionship. Even from where he was seated across from his Alpha and Vesa he could scent Vesa’s disappointment.
No doubt scenting it too, Haddix grabbed Vesa’s hand and gave it a squeeze offering, “Wanna go to town and catch a movie?”
That fast, Vesa’s scent morphed to one of contentment.
Watching Haddix stand effortlessly with Vesa in his arms before setting her feet on the floor, Tyson wondered if Haddix truly enjoyed spending so much time with his new mate. Nostrils flaring, he let Monster sift through the scents filling the room until he realized that with all the recent commotion at the compound he’d missed it. Inhaling again, a grin kicked at one corner of his mouth.
I’ll be damned.
Haddix was happy. Finally, unbelievably, legitimately, happy!
Shoving up off the couch, Tyson met his Alpha’s gaze. Haddix gave him a knowing nod. Yeah, he was going to follow Cersi, and yeah, Haddix knew it. Since she’d arrived, Tyson found it difficult to stay away from her for too long. He told himself it was because she was an outsider, un-trusted and unknown. He tried to convince himself that it was the potential threat she posed that kept him stalking her, and not interest. It was all bullshit. She wasn’t a threat any more than Vesa or Afften were, and he chased her because he was hot as a goddamn rutting bull elk and he had his eyes set on her.
On his way out of the kitchen he heard Vesa beam, “Ooooh, can we watch a sci-fi?”
He smiled at Haddix’s groan. It was well known in the pack that Haddix hated sci-fi movies. Hell, they all did, but only because they got enough of it in real life. He didn’t envy his Alpha today.
Hurrying to the front room, he hoped to catch Cersi before she left the house, but by the time he got there, the coat and boots she’d been borrowing from Vesa were gone.
Tyson jerked his boots onto his bare feet and slipped into his coat.
Outside, he let his nose lead him. Picking up Cersi’s scent was easy. Monster was tuned to her now. His senses honed in on her, and he had to ignore how the front of his jeans tightened painfully as he drank in her sweet scent. Mmm, brown sugar and buttercream. The smell reminded him of how her skin tasted, which reminded him of fucking her, and the closer he got to where he knew was, the faster Monster paced.
He found her at the end of the compound that was furthest from his cabin. Was it a message? Fuck yeah, but it was one he ignored.
Sneaking up on her was easy because he was part wolf and knew how to move with stealth. She didn’t hear him coming which meant he was able to catch another of those rare moments where she was unguarded. Standing in shin-deep snow, she had her head tilted back, her face presented the sky. Her eyes were closed while she just stood there just breathing in the crisp mountain air.
“Beautiful.” He’d meant to mutter it under his breath, but when Cersi whirled around, he knew she heard.
Startled gaze locked on him, it took her a minute to mask her surprise before she looked back up at the sky. “Yeah, it’s beautiful here.”
“Wasn’t talking about the view, Badass. I was talking about you.”
She snorted and continued to look at the sky a minute before slowly turning to face
him. “You think I’m beautiful, Tyson BloodMoon?”
“Yeah,” he muttered. “You’re beautiful, Cersi. Hell, you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, but your looks are nothing compared to how breathtaking your soul is.” He narrowed his eyes on her. “I know what you did.”
She didn’t react.
“For Vesa. I know you became a Bounty Huntress so you could hunt down her family. I know you did that just to gift her closure.”
“I’m not that noble,” she admonished. “I looked for my parents first.”
“Lie,” he growled out. “You looked for your parents way after you found Vesa’s, just last year in fact. You keep trying to hide your shine, woman, but it keeps blinding me.”
He took a step toward her, but Cersi surprised him when she backed up. It was the first time she’d shown any real sign of submission. He suspected it was because she was feeling the way he was. Raw. He felt exposed after what they’d shared. He knew it had to be worse for her, especially after the way he’d thrown her out afterward.
“I’m sorry about last night,” he rushed out before she could stop him. He’d been dying to apologize, and he needed to say the words to her.
“Yeah, me too.” She faced away from him again and thank fuck. He knew he paled at her words. They gutted him because he didn’t know if she meant that she was sorry he’d been such a dick or if she was sorry about what they’d shared. He prayed it wasn’t the latter because he didn’t regret it, and thinking she did felt like she was taking it away from him.
“I was trying to protect you.”
She shot him a disbelieving glance over her shoulder. That look. It was the one she gave him that made him feel like she could see straight through him. He wasn’t worried about it though. It didn’t worry him because he wanted her to know what kind of beast he was. For the first time in ever, he wanted to be seen. But sharing what they had was a two-way street, and he knew Cersi would be worried about feeling too exposed. She was probably over thinking it this very minute. She’d be afraid that he’d see who she really was. She’d still be trying to hide behind the façade she’d built up, the fake badass persona of who she wanted the world to believe she was. She couldn’t hide from him though. He was a hunter, and Monster didn’t see disguises. Monster saw the truth, and the truth was that Cersi was light. She was right and good and clean and pure. She was air that breathed life into his lungs and fanned the flames of his Monster. She was his.
He’d had enough of her running. Monster had made his choice, and Tyson was all in too.
He was on her in two big strides. She gasped as he grabbed her and spun her to face him. She tensed, her hands flattening on his chest to keep him at bay, but he wasn’t having it. Wrapping her up in his arms, he lowered his head, their breath mingling until he pushed his forehead into hers. “I know what you’re doing, Beautiful.” Her body was rigid in his arms. “Whenever you let me get too close, I can smell your distress. You don’t like people getting close, do you?”
“No,” he answered for her. “You’ve had your guts ripped out by life, your insides have been shredded, and I get it. Your heart is fragile. It’s been crushed, so now you keep it hidden away, and locked up in a cage where you only pull it out on rare occasions. Probably when you’re alone and feeling vulnerable, probably when you want to remind yourself that you’re real.” He could scent emotions roiling within her like an oncoming storm, they increased in intensity with each passing second. “You probably lock yourself in the bathroom and look at yourself in the mirror while your eyes swirl with self-doubt as you try to remind yourself that you’re deserving.” He tightened his arms around her, enveloping her in his warmth, “And by the Gods, Cersi, you are deserving! And I promise you that I’m not trying to take anything from you. I promise you I would never.”
“Promises,” she huffed quietly. “What else are you gonna promise me, Tyson?”
“I can promise you that today is gonna be hard. And I can promise you that tomorrow’s gonna be hard. Next week, next month, next year…it’s all gonna be hard, and I promise that you can’t do shit to stop or change that. What you can do is find somebody to help you wade through the tough stuff. You can find someone you can rely on, someone to help you. You can find someone to help make the hard days do-able. You can find someone to help you carry that load.”
“You him,” she asked. “You gonna help me? You gonna save me? Be my hero?”
The sarcasm in her tone pricked at Monster, but Tyson squeezed her tighter. “No. I’m not gonna be anything you won’t let me be or do anything you won’t let me do, Beautiful. What I’m promising you is that if you gave me a chance, if you let me, I have a Monster who needs a mission, and guarding your heart is the only thing that interests him. I don’t wanna hold it. I’m not asking for that kind of trust from you just yet, but if you let me, I’d like to help you protect it. I’m damn good at protecting things, good at keeping things safe. I know you’ve been afraid of letting people in and for good reason. You haven’t fallen for a man because you’ve never believed that he’d be there to catch you. I will. I wanna be the one who proves you wrong. I wanna be the one who makes up for all those years you weren’t loved right. Don’t,” he huffed out pinching his eyes shut tight, he curled his fingers around the nape of her neck and pushed her head into his chest, resting his chin on top of her head. “Monster’s been baying at the moon for years, and it tears me up inside every damn time. Don’t make me admire you from afar too.”
He smelled her tears before he felt the warmth of them on his chest.
“I don’t…” Cersi began, but he cut her off.
“No. Don’t answer now. Just wait. Sleep on it. Mull it over. Trust is a big fucking deal and even more so for people like us. And I know me offering myself up ain’t much. I’ve got a dark beast sleeping inside of me. He scares everyone. He used to scare me too until you came along. You made everyday worth the fight, and I’d continue that fight…for you, with you. And, if you find me worthy…” He released her and stepped back, dropping his arms to his sides. “If you want someone to fight with instead of against…find me.”
Turning and walking away from her was the hardest thing he’d ever done, and Monster was pissed at how he’d left things. They were open-ended. Cersi could still walk away. She could take his offer and simply bolt. She probably would. After all, what was he offering? Himself? A shifter harboring an uncontrollable Monster in his middle? Who’d want that? Hell, half the time he didn’t want to be around himself, but what else could he do. He’d faced demons and beasts the likes of which most would only ever read about in horror stories, but offering himself up to this woman was the most terrifying thing he’d ever done.
Chapter 22
Gone! Cersi was gone.
The knowledge still had Monster raging inside of him, but the human part of him…well, that part was hurting.
Sitting on his front porch glaring out at the woods, he felt numb but it had nothing to do with the subzero temperatures. It was just past noon. The sun was covered by a thick layer of fat pink and gray clouds that warned of more oncoming snow.
Haddix, who’d delivered the news of Cersi leaving BlackLodge earlier that morning, was back at Tyson’s cabin for the third time since delivering the bad news. Bent over, Haddix leaned his forearms on the front porch railing, head angled to stare at Tyson. “How you doing, man?”
Tyson’s answer was a grunt.
Noah rounded the corner and shot Tyson a solemn look before jerking his chin at them by way of salutation. His booted feet pounded up the stairs where he clapped Haddix on the back before taking the empty rocking chair beside him. “Guess everyone wanted to check on Monster today, huh? You doing okay?”
Annoyed, Tyson shoved up out of his chair and blew out a pent-up breath before burying his fists in his hair. Hell no, he wasn’t alright, but he sure as shit wasn’t going to sit around and have a fucking pity party over it. “I’m good,” he grunted knowing they both could
scent the lie.
“Hey!” Noah shoved up off his chair. “Wanna go into town? We can hit the Celtic, troll for some ladies?”
Tyson just dropped his hands and shook his head.
“Come on, bro!” Noah prodded. “When’s the last time you been laid?”
Tyson gave him a look which was matched by Haddix. They all knew the last time he’d been laid was two nights ago when he’d been with Cersi.
“Shhhit,” Noah breathed. “Sorry.”
Tyson clomped down the stairs. “I’m gonna go for a run.”
“You sure? Another woman might…”
“No!” Tyson shot Noah a hard look. “I ain’t burying my pain into somebody else. It ain’t right.”
Without another word, he disappeared into the forest, stripping off his shirt as he went.
On his porch, Haddix gave Noah a sympathetic smile. “Ain’t no harm in trying.”
Alone in the woods, Tyson fought the desire to go to town and drink until everything and everyone disappeared. Bad things happened when he got drunk, so he usually avoided drinking. Right now though, the need to go get hammered and pick a few fights was humming through him like the incessant growl of Monster. Poor fucker hadn’t stopped snarling since Haddix knocked on their door early that morning and Tyson was having a hell of a time keeping the beast from taking his skin.
He should have known better. He’d offered Cersi all he had, which was just him and a fucked up animal that everyone called Monster and she’d walked. Of course she’d walked. Who wouldn’t? He was disgusted with himself for even making the offer and embarrassed that he had. It wasn’t enough for a woman like Cersi. He wasn’t enough, and he knew it. A woman like her deserved better than a Monster like him.
Deep in the forest, he shifted and ran. He ran so damn hard and so damn far. The whole time he sprinted there was something building in the back of his throat. Finally, he slid to a stop on the edge of their pack territory and threw his head back and bayed a lonesome, pain-filled howl.
***
Cersi felt like she was dying inside. She felt sick and hollow, and every time she thought about Tyson walking into the main house and realizing she’d left, her gut twisted with shame and regret.
