by J. C. Hart
"And is he okay?" Carson's eye twitched, just a little.
"Don't you know?" Madea asked. "I heard he was doing some work for you."
"Be that as it may, I don't keep tabs on everyone in the colony, you know." His lips twisted into an awkward smile, though she could see a sliver of uncertainty behind his eyes.
Madea took the seat to the right of her father, the same seat she had sat in for years. Sarai sat opposite and their father waited until they were both seated before slipping into his.
"This is nice. It's been awhile since we've all had dinner together."
"Too long." Sarai’s look was pointed.
"Well, we'll have to make sure it happens more often. I've missed having both my girls under one roof."
"It has been some time," Madea said. A servant brought in bowls of steaming soup. Hers sat untouched for a few minutes while she decided if it smelled like something she could stomach. She let their talk about the last few days wash over her, only commenting on their lives, not offering anything of her own. What could she say? Daddy, I'm pregnant and the father may or may not have tried to kill himself last night. Daddy, I was outside too long. I think I'm Touched. Daddy, there is a boy at my house. No, not a man-boy, an actual boy, someone else’s son who I'm taking care of, but I'm not very good at it. Daddy, what the hell did I do to deserve all of this?
What had gotten into her? She took a deep breath, trying to focus on what was being said and push down all the crazy thoughts swirling in her mind. Sometimes, life sucked. She had to remind herself of that. Sometimes, bad things happen to good people. That was important to remember too.
"Madea?"
"Huh?" She frowned at Sarai.
"Daddy was asking what else you've been up to." Sarai was giving her the smallest of nods, as if prompting her to speak.
"I...well, I have some news." Her throat felt dry. She grabbed her glass of water and swallowed the rest of it. Her stomach heaved, but she was sure it wasn't morning sickness this time. Did she really want to tell him? Was Sarai going to give her a choice?
"Come on, spit it out." Her father smiled at her and reached across the table to grasp her hand. It felt awkward.
"I'm having a baby." She smiled, but her lips felt like jelly, their quivering betrayed her nerves. Her father pulled his hand back a little, then grasped her fingers firmer. His lips were tight, and his eyes bored into her. He opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again.
"Isn't that exciting, Daddy?" Sarai prompted. "I'm going to be an aunty, and you'll be a grandfather!"
"It's...wonderful." There was warmth in his voice, and shock. Madea clung to the sliver of tenderness.
"I know it's a bit of a surprise, but I wanted you to know." What she really felt like saying was 'I'm sorry, I know you wanted more than this from me,' but she was damned if she'd admit it.
"I...I don't really know what to say. When is my grandchild going to be born?" A smile cracked through the tightness of his face, like dry earth splitting from a drought.
"I'm not sure exactly. Maybe six months? I only found out for sure a few days ago."
"And the father?" He raised an eyebrow. "Is he in the picture?"
Madea took a deep breath, trying to swallow the anger that threatened to pour out of her like lava. She should have known he would ask. "He's supportive. Still getting his head around it."
"I see." He nodded briefly, eyes still boring into hers.
"You see what?" She pursed her lips. "What is it that you see? Why can't you be happy for me?" She pushed her seat back so hard that it tipped over and clattered on the floor as she stormed away from the table.
"Madea," he called after her. "I didn't mean it like that!"
She waved a hand behind her, dismissing him and anything else he might have to say.
Once she had locked the bathroom door she splashed cold water on her face. She had been holding it together so well, but he just had to ask. She should have told him it was fine, should have lied. It would have made life a whole lot easier. She let out a pent up growl, trying to push her rage out with it. There was a knock at the door, which made her snarl again.
"What do you want?"
"I just..." She could hear her father sigh on the other side of the door. "I wish we didn't have to do this. So many of our conversations are through closed doors. Have you ever thought about that? You know I wasn't trying to judge you. I'm worried about you. I'm your father. I'm allowed to worry."
"And I'm an adult, I'm allowed to..." She wanted to say 'make mistakes', but then this baby would be permanently labelled as one, and she didn't want that. "I don't want to fight about this. It's my baby, and I want it."
"I've always wanted to be a granddad, but I thought it would be Sarai having babies first."
A smile slipped across her lips. "Me too," she confessed.
"Come out and let's finish dinner. For her. You know how much she hates it when we argue."
"I'll come out, but after dinner, you and I need to have a talk. In private." She opened the door.
"Should I be worried?" His brow was furrowed, as if he were trying to figure out what else she might reveal to him, something that needed privacy.
"I don't know."
Her father closed the door behind them and sat down behind his desk. She hadn't been in his study for close to five years now, not since she had moved out of home. It was unusual enough to be here, but to be alone with him, well, that was almost unheard of.
"So, what did you want to talk about? Sit, please. You're making me nervous." He gestured to the chair at the other side of the desk.
"No. Thanks. I think it's better that I stand."
"If this is about the baby—"
"It's not." She let out the breath she'd been holding and then reached into her bag. Her fingers found the box, still cool despite the warmth of the evening. She drew it from the bag and placed it on the desk between them. "A man gave this to me, and he told me that I needed to give it to you."
Her father's eyes flicked between her and the box. It was a full minute before he reached out and pulled it closer, nonchalantly turning it so that its catch faced him. He flicked it undone with one finger and then lifted the lid and pushed it back. It hit the desk, the thud seeming louder than it should for the small size of it. He opened his mouth, then closed it again, his eyes fixed on the seal within.
"What does it mean?" she asked.
He looked up at her, shock making the whites of his eyes stand out more. "You've been Touched."
"What?" The blood rushed from her face and she grasped the edge of the desk. "No, I haven't."
"You don't understand, Maddy."
He never called her by her nickname. Never.
"This seal...I... They wanted me to stop the Hollowings, and they said that they would...I didn't. I couldn't."
She had never seen him struggle so hard to form a sentence. "I don't get it." She shook her head. "I'm not Touched. You don't need to worry." She tried to reach for his hand but he drew back.
"Don't touch me." He was shaking his head now too. "You're tainted. And my grandchild. You can't have this baby. We have to call the doctor. Now." He reached for the phone but she snatched it from his hand and pulled it from the wall.
"This is my baby. And I'm keeping it." She frowned. Anger, confusion and hurt welled inside her, fighting for supremacy. He couldn't mean she had to abort it. Could he?
"You are my daughter, and I won't let you. You will not bring a mad baby into this world. You will not taint our family name further." He stood, planting his hands on the desk. His face had gone from white to red in a matter of seconds.
Madea backed up a step. "Father, think about what you're saying. I'm your daughter. You don't want to do this."
"You've given me no choice. Consorting with people you shouldn't, bringing shame to our family. You're just like your mother." He all but bellowed the words, his body trembling with fury. "I can't let this affect our family, Maddy. You must see t
hat. Surely." His features softened, his shoulders sagged. "You're not well. You're not thinking straight."
"I'm thinking fine, Father." Her voice was firm but her heart wavered. Was he right about her state of mind? And what had he meant about Mother? "Whether I’m Touched, or not, this is my baby and I'm going to have it."
"You can't bring an abomination into the world." He shook his head, disgust in his eyes.
She pressed back against the door, feeling for the handle. The metal of it felt slick under the sweat of her palms and she twisted it, pulling it open.
He lunged out of his chair toward her but she slipped through the door and pulled it closed. She glanced both ways then ran towards the back door, hoping it was the less obvious option.
"Maddy?" Sarai's confused call came from behind her but couldn't stop to answer it. Their father wasn't in the hallway yet, which meant one thing—he'd called Enforcers in to stop her. There was no time to waste.
When she had lived here, she had always found ways to escape her father's notice. Now those old paths came in handy. She slipped out the back door and pushed down the side of the house between the wall and the bushes that hugged it until she came to an old tank. Once wedged behind it she sank to the ground, hugged her knees and waited for the inevitable rush of bodies out the door as they went searching for her.
It didn't take long before footsteps pounded on the gravel. She closed her eyes, willing them to avoid the spot she was lurking in. No one had discovered this hidey-hole before, so she should be safe for now. She grabbed her phone from her pocket and put it on silent; it would be just like her sister to call her now and give away her location.
This was not how she'd planned for things to go. If only she'd known what that seal had meant, she wouldn't have given it to him. Though, that wouldn't have tied in with Garrett's plans, whatever those were. Had he known how her father would react?
Despite the fact that this predicament was very much his fault, Garrett was the only one who could help her out of this situation. He'd told her that things would get difficult—hell, he'd made sure they would—and that he would be there for her when that happened. Unfortunately for her, that was a lot sooner than she would have liked.
Madea drew in a shaky breath. She'd thought tonight would have gone some way to reconciling her differences with her father, but now he was determined to have her baby aborted and probably have her Hollowed. He should want to protect her, protect his grandchild. Tears stung her eyes and she rubbed them away with the back of her hand.
Madea pushed her way through the hedge and made her way from tree to tree, sticking to the shadows until she was well out of the property.
It took a good hour before she felt safe enough to pull out the slim phone Garrett had given her in the transport. Her hands shook as she made the call.
"Hello?" he answered on the third ring. His voice was full of sleep and she took a deep breath before daring to speak.
"It's Madea. I need you. Father turned on me and he said...he said..." She let out a sob, hating herself for showing weakness to him, of all people.
"Where are you?" His voice was alert now. She could picture him sitting up, leaning forward as though she were across a table from him.
"In an alley, Dome Five. I don't know if he's still looking for me."
"He will be, I'm sure."
"I don't know what to do."
"You did, you called me." He gave a soft laugh. "I'll come and get you. Do you think you can make it to Dome Four? In the communal area, there is a fountain. Wait within earshot of that, and I'll see you soon."
"Okay." She felt numb, unable to process what he was saying to her.
"Madea?"
"Yes?"
"You did the right thing. I can help."
"Thanks." It did little to make her feel better, but she nodded.
"And get rid of your phone. They can trace it, even if you have it off. We don't want to risk you getting caught."
"Right. Okay then." She ended the call and gripped her phone. It was just plastic and metal and computer components, but she felt a wash of anxiety at the thought of discarding it. Jaxon was at her house, Rickard was there too. How would she get in touch with them? Would her sister look after the boy until she could find a way to get him? She felt bile rise in the back of her throat and spat it onto the dusty ground, grimacing as she wiped her lips clean.
She couldn't leave Jaxon for long. She would have to appeal to Garrett's kindness, if he had any, and get Jaxon back. He needed her.
Or maybe, she needed him. Because, now that her father knew, the boy would be safer with Rickard and Sarai. Wouldn't he? He would have a stable, secure life. Sarai was motherly, and he knew them as well as he knew her.
No. No one knew his past, and if he was the son of a man who was out to get him then he wouldn't be safe anywhere. She turned off the phone and dropped it on the ground, crushing it beneath her shoe.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
A chill leached through her coat, her dress, and into her skin. She lurked in the shadows, trying to be still as she waited for Garrett to show. Paranoid thoughts raced through her mind. What if he didn't come? What if he had wanted to cut her communications with others? What if this was all a trap? After all, he knew she was Touched, knew she would be going mad. Maybe he wanted to get her Hollowed for his own purposes.
She clenched her fists again, only stopping when her nails dug into the flesh of her palm. Where was he? She had no choice but to trust him, as annoying as he was, and she wouldn't handle it if he was out to get her.
"Madea." The whisper came from across the square. She could make out a shadow, dark black against the grey units. "Are you here?"
She paused for a moment, her reply catching on her lips before spilling out into the darkness. "Garrett?"
"Who else would be sneaking around at this time of night?"
She could hear the humour in his voice, and for the first time in hours, she smiled. She stepped out of the shadows and they met halfway across the square.
"So you're saying you do this thing all the time?" The fountain burbled quietly beside them, and maybe, on any other night, it might have been a nice place to be. He took her by the elbow and led her down a short alley.
"I'm trying not to make a habit of it." He placed a bag in her hands. "Here, get changed. I'll keep an eye out, and don't worry, I won't peek."
"Right." She rolled her eyes. Whether he took the chance to sneak a look was the least of her worries right now. Still, she waited for him to get to the end of the alley and once he'd taken his place, she pulled pants and a hooded top from the bag. She stripped her dress off, and shoved it in, cringing as she thought of the wrinkles she was creating. At least it wouldn't get dirty. She dragged her new clothes on, pulling the belt tight to keep the pants from falling down. "I'm done," she called as she slung the bag over her shoulder.
"Great. Let's get out of here." He reached a hand towards her and she frowned. "What?"
"Nothing." She grabbed hold of it, unable to avoid thinking about the roughness of his fingers against hers.
"Once we're safe, you can ask questions. For now, follow my lead." He pulled her out into the street and they headed away from Dome Four and into the busier streets of Dome Three.
"What are we doing here?" she asked, her voice hushed.
He squeezed her hand and drew her body closer to his. "Blending in. It's far easier to lose someone in a crowd than in solitude."
"No one followed me—"
"We don't want to take any risks now. Or did you want to be Hollowed?"
Madea froze. "What did you say?"
"I know what happened, Madea. And if you're running from your father it means he didn't offer to keep you safe. Did he?"
The question forced tears into her eyes. She still couldn't believe that he would turn her, or her baby, over so easily. Their relationship had been difficult, but deep down she had always believed she was more important than his reputation. And it
was his fault, he who ignored the threat and caused her to be Touched.
"I'm sorry," Garrett said. He squeezed her hand a little firmer. "I know this is a hard time for you, but we need to be careful."
"Yeah." She sniffed and shook herself free of sorrow. The crowd was moving around her, people coming from bars, or entering them. She felt out of place in this world, the one in which people had a life outside of work, outside of their homes.
"We have company." Garrett tugged on her hand and they were off, winding through the throng of humanity. They had only gone a hundred metres when he pressed her against a wall and leaned into her. "Follow my lead," he said again, a glint in his eyes.
She frowned, uncertain what he meant, but uncomfortably aware of the proximity of his body. He smelled like dust, like sweat, and then his lips were pressing against hers, his hands tangling in her hair. She pushed against his chest, but he moved his lips to her neck, then the lobe of her ear. She couldn't help but arch her body into him as he found her sweet spot and nipped it.
"We have an audience," he murmured. "Go with it."
Recklessness swelled in her. She brought a hand to his face and moved his mouth back to hers. His chin was rough with stubble but the scratch against her skin made the moment more real. This was nothing like kissing Sullivan. The fire she'd seen in Garrett's eyes the first time they met was present in the scorch of his lips, in each touch of his hands on her body.
Madea didn't have time to be outraged at the liberties he was taking; she was too caught in the moment.
And if this was how he kissed a stranger...
Well, he must really want to keep her safe.
After a few minutes he drew back from her lips and nuzzled her neck. "Can you see anyone looking at us? There were two burly men, black pants, red vests."
Madea took a shuddery breath and glanced around as she exhaled. The oxygen did nothing to slow her racing heart. "No, I don't think I can see them...are you sure we were being watched?"
"As much fun as it was making out with you, I usually try to get to know someone a little better before sticking my tongue in their mouth." She could feel him smile against her neck and the tingle it sent through her body made her shiver. "If you think we're clear, we'll make a move."
