His gaze flicked from her face to the paddle. Holding out his hand, he waited for her to hand it over.
“Easy to swing, yet heavy enough to leave an impression.” Carter slapped his open palm with the wide face. “Nice and big too. I’ll be able to hit most of your ass with this. I approve.”
Paige relaxed and nodded. “Thank you, Sir.”
When she stepped closer, intending to climb back on his lap, Carter crossed his legs and leaned back. “Not yet. I want to make sure I do this properly. Need room to move.”
“Whatever you want, Sir.” It came out harsher than Paige intended, dragging a snort from Carter.
“This has nothing to do with me at all, as you are aware. We are simply getting to know each other, seeing if there is something here we might want to explore further. You can walk out that door anytime you want, I won’t move a muscle to stop you. But if you stay, I want you to give yourself over to me completely. That means doing what I ask, without the snark.”
Paige let her gaze drop, hating her inadequacies. “I’m sorry, Sir. I didn’t think it would be this hard.”
“It’s not like this is your first time. Which means you’ve had a nasty experience that stopped you from coming back when it’s something you clearly want. Look at me.” Leaning forward, Carter braced his arms on his knees, letting the paddle dangle, and waited until she met his gaze. “Answer me truthfully. Do you feel pressured in any way to be here with me?”
“No, Sir.”
“And while I know we’ve only begun, have I done anything, anything at all to have made you feel uncomfortable?”
“No, nothing.”
“You can leave, Paige. I hope you don’t, but I’d understand. Is that what you want? Think before you answer.”
Was it? Despite the emotional hurricane raging inside her, Paige knew the center of the storm was approaching. If she could hold on a bit longer, she’d sink into that place where her mind would find comfort.
Paige met Carter’s gaze and relaxed. “No, Sir. I don’t want to leave. I’ve been running away from this for a long time and I need to get my head straight. If you’re willing to help me, I would appreciate it.”
Carter leaned back once more and folded his arms. “Then you know what to do.”
With her heart pounding, Paige reached behind her for the zipper. Her fingers were steady as she pulled the tab down, having fully accepted what she was doing. Carter was someone Josh trusted, and she trusted Josh. More important, Paige trusted herself to leave if there was a problem.
Holding the skirt together with one hand, she kept her gaze on Carter, making sure that they were both on the same page, before finally dropping it. The air was cool in contrast to the heat coming from her ass and her pussy. Even though she still wore the corset, Paige was more exposed than had she been completely naked.
Carter’s gaze drifted down her body, stopping on her breasts, her stomach, lower. He flexed his grip on the paddle. “Beautiful.”
Paige’s face heated.
“Now you have another choice. Do you want to do this over my lap again, or would you prefer to lean over the chest? I can work with either.”
Being on his lap would cut the sting down, given the slightly awkward angle, but would let her feel him. The chest would give him room to move, allowing him to make every smack count.
“The chest, Sir.”
Carter nodded, indicating she should move. The boots and corset would project an interesting image as she walked over. She made sure to add a little enticing sway to her hips as she went.
Paige cleared her mind and braced her hands on the edge of the chest. She hated when he didn’t move right away. Being watched was hard for her, especially when she wasn’t in motion. All the noise and activity kept her grounded. It was easier to hide, distract others when she never stopped long enough for others to notice.
Squeezing the edge, she was once again forced to close her eyes and take several deep breaths to calm herself. Everything relaxed into place, as she concentrated on the beats of her heart and the steady in-out of her breathing. She’d gone deep into herself and hadn’t realized Carter was standing beside her until he ran a hand down across her ass cheek.
“That’s better,” he muttered, giving her ass a small pinch. “I want you to keep your eyes closed and concentrate on your breathing. I’m not going to go easy on you, but I will check to make sure you’re okay. Understand?”
“Yes.”
He slapped her ass hard, and Paige cried out.
“Sir. Yes, Sir.”
“Good girl. I want you to count like you did before.”
The comforting presence of Carter’s body beside her disappeared, causing Paige to whimper. Unlike before, he didn’t touch her body as he moved into position behind her. Again he waited and Paige knew he was waiting for her to do as he’d asked. She let her head hang and started to count the breaths.
In and out. One.
In and out. Two.
In and out. Thr—
The crack of the wood hitting her ass was almost as loud as the scream she let loose. God dammit, that hurt! Paige let out a small sob and gave her head a shake. “One.”
“I want you to think about the reasons why you walked away from this, Paige. You had one, a serious one if I had to guess. I need you to consider if that reason is still valid.”
The sting had morphed into a burn, her already sensitive flesh and ragged nerves not ready for the hit or the question. Still, she let her mind wander to Rick. He’d hurt her, hadn’t listened to what she’d needed, when she’d needed it. He’d been after his own pleasure, using her as a tool to get off rather than a partner to share a life with.
But not Carter. This was all for her.
The second smack was as hard as the first, but the burn had shifted into a numbness that heated her entire cunt. She was wet as the tingling traveled down her thighs. Fuck, she hadn’t been this turned on in years. Light pressure against her clit would be all she’d need to make her come. Not even Rick got her this hot in their time together, and he’d done a whole hell of a lot more than paddle her ass.
After the third smack, Carter stepped in and ran a hand down her back. Paige was sweating beneath the corset, the fabric scratching against her skin as she adjusted her stance. Her legs shook and she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to hold herself up much longer.
Carter slipped one hand around her hip to hold her steady, while he dipped the other between her legs. Her clit was swollen and it wouldn’t take much to push her over the edge. Fuck, she needed to come badly, or else she might possibly go mad. Teasing her opening with his finger, Carter hummed in her ear, nipping at the lobe.
“You’re standing there taking it. You’re listening to me and doing what I want. But we’ve only started, haven’t we?”
“Yes—” she swallowed, “—Sir.”
“Are you ready?”
Paige couldn’t answer verbally. Instead she nodded and pushed her ass back toward him. Carter’s soft growl was the only acknowledgement he gave. He pulled back and landed two hard smacks in rapid succession. He didn’t hold back, and yet he wasn’t trying to break her.
“Four. Five.”
“That reason for you not coming here, I want you to think about it again. If it’s not an issue for you any longer I want you to say goodbye to it and let it go. Do you understand me?”
She nodded again.
Smack!
“Six.”
Rick was long gone. He’d moved to Montreal a few months after she’d kicked him out and changed her phone number. She’d been scared and angry for a long time after that. Scared she’d find herself back in another emotionally abusive relationship, when she needed pain as a release. Angry for having been too blind to appreciate the difference.
Smack!
“No!” The tears were flowing down her face again, but this time it had little to do with the physical pain. Rick had taken this from her. This was what she’d wanted, needed, a
nd she wouldn’t let the specter of her past relationship control her any longer.
“No what, Paige? Who are you saying no to?”
“Rick. Fucking asshole.” She wouldn’t let him continue to win.
“That’s my girl. Let it go.” The kiss to her bare shoulder. “He’s not here anymore and you are okay.”
“I’m okay,” she mumbled, nodding her head. “I’m okay.”
“Now, what number was that, Paige? I need you to tell me.”
Numbers? Shit, she was supposed to be counting. Five? No, that wasn’t right. “Seven.”
“That’s right. See, you know. And that means we’re almost done.”
With smack number eight, the blackness of peace slipped over her and Paige was no longer able to find her voice. Somewhere she registered the last two smacks before Carter’s arms were around her and her face was pressed to his chest.
“Fucking gorgeous. You’re amazing, Paige. I want to taste you. Need to…”
He set her on the table and dropped to his knees. Paige’s mind floated as he spread her thighs wide and breathed in her scent. Carter’s attention was focused on her cunt and he pushed a finger into her. Paige gasped when he leaned in and licked a swipe up across her lips.
The tingle from the blood rushing through the over-sensitized area ignited to a full-out blaze. Paige moaned, mesmerized by the precision of his licks. He tasted every inch of skin he could get his tongue on. As he increased the pace of the hand pumping into her, her battle was lost. Screwing her eyes shut, she let the orgasm explode, rending apart the remains of her resistance.
She must have blacked out because the next thing she knew she was sitting on the floor, wrapped up in Carter’s arms.
“There she is.”
Blinking up at him, Paige let the real world filter back in through the haze of her post-coital bliss. She swallowed down a dry lump.
“Here.” Carter held up the water bottle and let her take a few sips. She whimpered when he took it away. “In a second. Let that settle first.”
After a few minutes and several more mouthfuls of water, Paige noticed that Carter’s hard-as-rock-cock was still firm beneath her. Resting her hand on his chest she leaned in and placed a kiss on his cheek.
“Would you like me to take care of that, Sir?”
He smiled, kissed her forehead but gave his head a shake. “I’m okay.”
“But—”
“No buts. This wasn’t about me. We’re getting to know each other tonight, and I’m not ready for that.”
“You feel ready to me.” Paige let her head fall against his shoulder, trying to ignore her disappointment. “If you’re sure?”
“I am. And before you go off thinking that you did something wrong or that I’m not attracted to you, stop.” He bucked his hips up. “Clearly that’s not the case.”
Why she was girlishly pleased by his comment, Paige didn’t want to examine too closely. “Why not then?”
“I don’t have sex with someone I’ve just met, sub or not. Scene or not. It’s my one rule.”
“Oh.”
They sat in the quiet of the room for several long minutes, but Paige didn’t feel uncomfortable in the least. Carter was constantly touching her, running his fingers through her hair, twirling the ends and tugging slightly, squeezing her hip. For the first time in ages her mind calmed and she seemed more settled in her skin, ready to face the world. She liked it.
Slipping her fingers between the buttoned fabric of his shirt to touch the warm skin of his chest, Paige turned her face. “Now what?”
“If you’re up for it, I suggest we go back downstairs, get ourselves a drink and talk.”
“Talk? About what?”
“Date type things.”
A date? A scene wasn’t normally the sort of thing she did when she first started dating someone. Then again, there would be no awkward moments of her needing to explain how she loved to be tied up and spanked.
Carter cocked an eyebrow at her, when she sat up and carefully got to her feet. She smiled as she bent down to get her skirt. “I want a rye and ginger.”
Chapter Five
“Dear God, the apocalypse must be on its way.”
Paige turned to stare blankly at Ian, doing her best to ignore the surprise on his face. “Sorry?”
“You’re humming.”
Paige opened her mouth to protest, only to shake her head, confused. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“You know, humming. That thing you do when you can’t remember the words, are in the shower or generally in a good mood. Lady Gaga, from the sound of it.”
“I am not humming.” Though she did have “Bad Romance” stuck in her head this morning. “You’re imagining things.”
Her phone chose that moment to buzz, announcing another text message. Her hand slipped into her pocket to curl around it, but she didn’t pull it out. No way she’d do that in front of Ian.
Ian rolled his eyes and added more beans into the roaster. “I’m not saying it’s a bad thing. It’s kind of nice actually.”
True, she’d been feeling lighter since her night out with Carter, but she hadn’t realized others were noticing. They’d spent the rest of the evening down in the bar, talking about the submissive strapped to the cross. Carter had wanted to know her impressions of the Dom’s technique, how he wasn’t pushing the sub far enough. What her preferences would have been.
That had been a far more difficult conversation.
Still, when he eventually put her in a cab to make sure she got safely home, the care with which he helped her into the car and gently shut the door, Paige knew she wanted to see him again. The texts had started later that night.
Carter had plans for the weekend, but he didn’t let that stop him. At first the texts were a distraction, little updates about what he’d been doing peppered throughout her day. But the more she received, the more she liked it. Carter wasn’t chatty face to face, his sly humor usually delivered with a soft chuckle. But through his notes, Paige started to see more of his sarcastic nature slipping through. After a week of messages, Paige found she was looking forward to them. The steady buzz of her phone was a pleasant distraction from her day.
“There it is again! A smile.”
Turning her back on her brother, she concentrated on stacking the clean mugs under the counter. “Shut up, Ian.”
“This doesn’t have anything to do with a certain fireman, does it?”
“No.”
“Because you haven’t said much since your date with him.”
“No, I haven’t.”
“Does that mean things are going okay? Are you going to see him again?”
“One date, Ian. That’s all. If there was something earth-shattering going on, you’d be the second to know.”
“You’re worse than Sadie with the personal life details.”
“For God’s sake, Ian, the last time I said anything to you about my personal life you freaked out.” Paige leaned forward and rested her head on the side of the counter door.
He tapped the top of her head, reaching over her to fill the coffee pot with filtered water. “You were talking about your sexual preferences. I don’t want to hear anything about that. I only want to know if you’re interested in this guy. If there’s a chance I might need to hire yet another staff member because you’re going to be out half the week.”
“We haven’t even talked about a second date, and the first one was barely that.” She couldn’t count it as a date when he’d spanked her soundly before giving her the best orgasm she’d had in years. That was way more intimate than learning about each other’s reading preferences or their favorite colors.
The phone in her pocket buzzed again. This time she snuck a peak. Sure enough, Carter’s phone number was on her screen.
How bout burgers? Do u like em w/cheese or r u into veggie?
Smiling, she quickly thumbed. Meat’s yummy. xtra cheese & bacon on mine plz.
Within
seconds of her hitting send, Carter’s reply bounced back. Then we shld go. I know a place.
When?
2morrow?
Her stomach did a little flip. Sounds good. I’ll call u 2nite?
KK.
She was going out on a date. Again.
The bell over the door sounded and Paige turned around as she shoved the phone back into her pocket. “Welcome to Pulled Long. What can I get—?”
Oh, hell no.
Rick stood inside the doorway, his hands on his hips and a grin on his face. “Hello, Paige.”
She’d pictured this day a few times after their last phone call three years earlier. None of the scenarios played out positively for her. At least this was public and Ian was here. While Rick might not have understood the line between foreplay and fucked-up, he never did anything outside of a club or their apartment to draw attention to their lifestyle. She hadn’t given him any chances after leaving him.
Swallowing down the sick rising in her throat, she plastered on her best fake smile and pretended he was another customer.
“What can I get for you? Our special today is mocha lattes and lemon loaf.”
Ian came up to stand beside her, his hands balled into fists below the counter. “Hello, Rick. I’d heard you’d left town?”
“I did, but now I’m back. Not enough interesting work in Montreal to hold my attention. I moved back to Toronto a few months ago.”
With every step he took closer to the counter, Paige’s chest tightened. She fought to keep her panic from showing, not wanting to give him any reason to think he could still affect her like this.
“What can I get for you?” Her voice was steady, but she found it challenging to keep her gaze locked on his.
The door chime sounded again as Blue Eyes walked in. “Hey, kids.” He didn’t let Rick’s presence stop him from making his way over to the counter and taking up residence on one of the vacant stools. “Can I get a black coffee and one of Sadie’s muffins, gorgeous?”
A Shot in the Dark Page 5
