“If it’s okay with your mom, when we get back tomorrow afternoon you can show me your favorite games.” Bennett shot a questioning glance in her direction.
She hoped Bennett meant it and wasn’t trying to put Ben off only to disappoint him later. Even with her worries, she nodded, the smile on Ben’s face too much to deny. “Fine with me.”
Bennett excused himself to put their overnight bags in his truck, both Jack London and Ben on his heels. He had managed to inspire devotion in both boy and beast.
“Ben is taken with him,” her mom said softly, loading the dishwasher. “I hope it wasn’t a mistake to introduce them so early on in your relationship.”
Relationship? The word set her heart racing. “I didn’t mean for anything to happen.”
“It’s not a bad thing, Harper. In fact, no matter how things turn out, this has all been good for you. But I don’t want to see Ben disappointed. He’s taken to Bennett like a duckling imprinting on its mama.”
“I didn’t realize how much Ben has missed out on by not having a father until I saw them together.” Harper grabbed the counter, the edge biting into her palm. “I know I have nothing to feel guilty about, but I do.”
“Can’t change the past. You can only move forward. Preferably happily.” Her mom’s sigh signaled she was done allowing Harper to wallow. She dried her hands on a dish towel and leaned against the counter, her voice brisk. “Are you going to come home with a signed lease?”
“This is a big step from looking at black-and-white numbers on a page.” She had spent countless hours working up a business plan. “Signing a contract scares the bejeezus out of me. And I’ll have to get Allison and a couple of the other ladies on board. Even though I’m putting up the money, I want them to feel a sense of ownership.”
“I know it’s scary, but a coffee business sounds like a fabulous idea. Bennett must think so, too, or he wouldn’t be investing his time. And money, in a roundabout way.”
Harper checked the time. “We need to hit the road.”
“Go on.” Her mom walked with her to the front door and jabbed an elbow in her side. “And, while you’re in the middle of doing business, try to have some fun.”
“Mom.” Why did the situation make her feel like a teenager again? “We’re staying with Allison and Darren and their kids. No chance for that kind of fun.”
She grabbed her purse and stepped out the front door. Still in his dinosaur pajamas, Ben stood in the driveway and kicked rocks. Bennett was crouched down at his level, whatever he was saying lost in the distance.
With a fluid grace, he rose. “How about I ask your mom?”
“Okay,” Ben muttered. Another rock skittered off his foot and into the grass.
“What do you think about Jack hanging out here for the weekend? He’d be bored with us, anyway.”
Harper tilted her head and tried to get a read on him. “Are you sure?”
“We’ll be so busy, it’ll make things easier.”
Ben sprang to life to hang on her arm. “Can he stay, Mommy? Please?”
“It’s up to Yaya.”
Her mom had a shoulder propped against the column at the top of the stairs. Ben linked his hands under his chin and repeated his plea. “Please, Yaya. Can he stay?”
“Only because he’s such a gentleman.” Her mom winked at Ben, who did a spastic dance of joy before throwing his arms around Jack’s neck.
“I’ll take really good care of him. I promise.”
“I know you will.” Bennett hauled the dog food and water dish out of the bed of the truck to the top of the porch steps. On his way back, he ruffled Ben’s hair. “If it’s sunny out tomorrow, we’ll throw a ball around as soon as we get back. Sound good?”
Ben’s grin was contagious, and Harper wasn’t even upset that she had to remind him to give her a hug. Ben, Jack, and her mom disappeared inside the house.
Without Jack, the cab of the truck felt cavernous. Bennett’s hands were tight on the steering wheel.
She tiptoed into the silence. “Are you sure—”
“Not a big deal.” His voice was clipped and uninviting.
Except it was. Jack London was part therapy dog, part best friend. She’d noticed the way Bennett reached for him during uncertainty or stress. “Have you ever spent the night away from him?”
“I don’t need a security blanket. I’m not a wuss.” A military-tinged edge was in his voice.
She shoved his shoulder—hard—and broke his stranglehold on the steering wheel. The truck jerked toward the center line.
“What the hell, Harper?”
“Don’t fire evasions in my directions, Caldwell. Not appreciated.” She sat back and crossed her arms and legs. “You’re as bad as Darren. Not admitting a single weakness. Are you SEALs born that way or do they brainwash you in training?”
“A little of both, I suppose. Meek, helpless bastards need not apply.”
“Is that what they put on the recruitment posters?”
The rumble coming from his chest was his particular brand of laughter. Humor interwoven with a dry sarcasm. His hands moved lower on the steering wheel and his body sank into the seat.
“It’s weird not to have Jack’s doggy breath on my neck.”
Tentatively, she touched his arm again, this time with a gentle stroke. “You have me, if it’s any consolation.”
With his face in profile, the tiny hitch at the corner of his mouth could be amusement or annoyance. “Your breath is a sight better than Jack’s. And based on last night, if I wake up from a nightmare you’re a lot more fun, too.”
“Bennett.” It was the first acknowledgment of her midnight invasion of his room and the embarrassment factor was nuclear.
“Are you blushing?” His voice veered from disbelief to amusement. “You literally jumped me last night, and now you’re red as a radish.”
“‘Jumped’ is a strong word. I advanced with intent.”
“Yeah, your intention was to jump me.”
She slapped his arm and would have again if he hadn’t grabbed her hand.
“See there, you can’t keep your hands off me. I’m irresistible,” he said.
Had this teasing, flirty side of him been lying dormant? Did she inspire it? “You are pretty irresistible.” She popped over the console far enough to kiss his cheek.
A familiar solemnness came over him, but instead of ignoring the moment, he lifted her hand and pressed a kiss on her palm. His lips were soft and warm; his beard, scratchy. Her nerve endings fired, overly sensitized to the difference.
He let go and she pressed her palms together as if she could transfer the feeling. A faint awkwardness descended. The new territory they’d entered together held surprises and pitfalls, and it would take time to explore and map.
The rest of the trip they discussed her business plan in depth. He pointed out some places, like advertising, where she would need to put more money. By the time they arrived at a potential property, she felt as comfortable as she ever would with moving forward.
Risk would always be lurking like a dark cloud, but if she succeeded the reward would be worth it. She glanced over at Bennett. Could the same be said for whatever was brewing between them?
They spent an hour looking over the empty retail space. In a strip mall close to the base, it was easy to get into and out of and saw lots of morning traffic. A storage area in the back could hold a roaster and bagging operations. Even better, there was a bakery across the street and possibilities fired in her brain. The coffee shop could sell bakery items and the bakery could sell Home Front coffee. A win-win.
Once they were back in the cab of the truck, she said, “It’s a great location. I need to run numbers on comparable rents in the area, though.”
“He’s asking too much. We need to talk him down.” He reached across her, opened the glove compartment, and dropped a paper in her lap. “Comparable rents in the area for similar square footage.”
She scanned the numbers. The ir
e that rose was aimed mostly at herself. She should have run the numbers already. It was basic stuff, and she hadn’t thought of it until now. She rattled the paper close to his face. “Why didn’t you share this with me earlier?”
“Didn’t think about it.”
“I realize this is your money and you’re trying to help, but I need to feel my way through this, Bennett. You have your own business to run.”
“Sorry.” He shot her an inscrutable look as he got them on the road. Of course, all his looks qualified as inscrutable in her mental dictionary. “You would have gone home and then run the numbers and come to the same conclusion. Use this information to negotiate.”
She sank down in her seat, the passing scenery blurred. She had been a stay-at-home wife and mother and then a simple accountant. Was she up to this or was she fooling herself?
They passed the base checkpoints and Harper gave directions to Allison and Darren’s house. “You weren’t down here much?”
“Nope.”
His monosyllabic answer fired her curiosity. What had filled Bennett’s time when their team was stateside? The questions would have to wait. He parked the truck at the curb in front of Darren and Allison’s house.
“Not bad for base housing.” He slid out.
She hummed, but a shiver passed through her. Allison gave an energy to wherever she lived. One of the shutters at the front window was hanging askew and the bushes hadn’t been trimmed since their fall growth, giving the house an unkempt, harried feel.
Allison greeted them at the door, offering Harper a hug and Bennett a welcoming smile. At first glance, she looked better. Less tired and not as stressed out. Although she’d also had time to prepare for their arrival, which along with a spread of appetizers and drinks included spackling the cracks in her life.
Their small talk echoed in the entry hall. The stairs creaked.
“Here’s Darren.” Allison’s demeanor changed subtly. Her smile grew brittle and a new tension enveloped her. Darren reached them and immediately offered Bennett a half handshake, half hug.
“It’s good to see you, Grizzly.”
“You too, Family Man.”
Bennett tapped his fist on Darren’s back and exchanged a glance with Harper over Darren’s shoulder. In it she could see the same worries that plagued her.
“Kids are out back playing. If you boys want to supervise, I’ll bring you each a beer.”
“That’d be great, Allison,” Bennett said.
“Thanks, babe.” Darren led the way through the kitchen and out the back door. His bedhead, bare feet, and sweatpants gave the impression of a man beyond caring.
Allison uncapped two beers and pointed to a platter full of mini-quiches. “You’ve got to try those. They are to die for.”
Harper’s stomach, already a mass of her own nerves, now clenched with worry over Allison and Darren. When Allison returned, Harper let her prattle on about the food and pour them both glasses of wine before she cut her off. “Enough. What is going on with Darren?”
Allison’s laugh was tinged with tears. “Leave it to you to cut through my BS.”
“That’s what friends do, dummy. Is he going to the therapy group?” Harper took a seat at the table and Allison joined her, slumping back and drinking half her glass of wine in one go.
She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “He went once. Said he wasn’t going back. His nightmares were worse than they had been in months that night, so I didn’t insist. I thought maybe being around other guys like him had made it sharper somehow.”
“Or maybe hearing the other guys made him face up to his own demons.”
“Maybe.” Allison drank the rest of her wine and poured more.
Wisdom didn’t present itself to Harper in a lightning strike. “Have you seen anyone?”
“I tried, but Darren got mad. Said he didn’t want me talking about him to a stranger. Or worse, some base shrink that might spread rumors.” She drank more wine and turned her head to the side. “He would kill me if he knew I’d talked to my wives group about him.”
“Sounds a little paranoid.” The acidic wine did nothing to settle her stomach. “What does he think about me?”
“He thinks me talking to you is okay. I guess because of what you went through with Noah. I’m hoping Bennett might be able to help him.”
Harper sat back and took another sip even though she didn’t want more. She wasn’t holding out hope that Bennett would be able to make a breakthrough with Darren. Problem was men like Bennett and Darren were trained to not exhibit weakness. They talked sports and reminisced about derring-do in the field, not how they struggled with nightmares and sleepwalking and depression.
Harper had seen the changes SEAL training had wrought in Noah over time. He’d been a good man from start to finish, but as the deployments racked up so did the walls between them. Some of the distance might have been the time spent apart or simply growing up or his desire to protect her.
She’d never probed too deeply about his deployments. He’d certainly faced similar trials to Bennett and Darren, and just as surely those experiences had changed him subtly but inexorably. Had she been naïve or had she not really wanted to know? How much about Noah had she not understood or even tried to understand? Hindsight was an evil bitch.
“You can’t count on Bennett to solve Darren’s problems.”
“Not solve but help him figure out how to move on. There’s always hope, right?” Allison’s accompanying laugh sounded close to tears. Hope was her only foothold to happiness, and Harper couldn’t bring herself to weaken it further.
“Of course there’s hope.”
Allison propped her chin on her palm and leaned onto the table, her tone lighter and teasing. “Enough about my boring problems. I want to hear everything.”
“We saw the property before heading here. It was really nice. Perfect, in fact. Small retail space in front and a larger well-ventilated area in back that we could convert into a roasting—”
“Not that. I mean, that’s awesome, and I do want to hear everything. But first, I’m dying for deets about you and Bennett. What’s going on?” Allison wagged a finger. “And don’t blow me off like you did on the phone. I can hear it in your voice when you talk about him.”
“Hear what?”
“Lus-s-t.” The way Allison drew the word out sent them into pealing laughter. It was like a release valve.
“I didn’t blow you off on the phone because nothing had happened last time I talked to you.”
“But something has happened now?” Allison’s eyes widened.
Harper put a hand over her mouth and whispered, “We kissed. It was weird and wonderful and way confusing.”
“Confusing how? Because of Noah?”
“Yeah, sort of.” She didn’t have the emotional fortitude to delve back into the deep-seated reasons. “It’s been a long time since I’ve liked a man and had the urge to … you know.”
“Do you feel like you’d be betraying Noah?”
“No. Yes. Bennett’s history with Noah is almost as long and strong as mine.”
Allison toyed with the stem of her wineglass. “Have you gotten anything else out of him about why he gave you the money?”
“I think it stems back to a vague promise Bennett made. Guilt money is all I can imagine. It’s like he holds himself responsible somehow for Noah’s death. The couple of times I’ve broached the subject, he’s iced me out.”
“That’s weird.”
“Yep.” Harper drained her glass in the silence.
“There’s only one thing that really matters.…” Allison paused until Harper looked up. “Is he a good kisser?”
Giggly laugher ensued. Harper’s cheeks warmed with the memories of the night before. Nothing they had done had been particularly scandalous, but the step she’d taken with him had been like Neil Armstrong’s first step on the moon—a giant leap for her.
Allison held up the bottle with her eyebrows raised in quest
ion. Harper covered her glass. “No more for me, thanks.”
“Will you please eat something? The kids won’t touch those stuffed mushrooms.”
The riot in her stomach had subsided. The wine and laughter had settled a sense of relative normalcy. The fraying of Allison and Darren’s life didn’t seem in imminent danger of rending completely in two.
She popped a mushroom into her mouth as Allison rose to pull out a covered pan from the refrigerator. “Are those your pork chops?” Harper’s mouth was already watering. “You are such a fabulous cook. You should write a recipe book. I could help you put it together.”
Allison slid the pan into the oven and closed it with her heel. “Another business venture? Don’t we have enough to handle?”
“Ugh. You’re right. Bennett is telling me I need to go to auctions to buy the equipment I need, but I have no clue what I’m doing.”
Allison leaned against the counter and crossed her arms. “Why don’t you enlist Madeline or Joyce?”
The two women from Allison’s group had taken a leadership role in planning and brainstorming and had been the most active during their long-distance chats and texts. Still, Harper wasn’t sure about entrusting them with major purchases.
“Did you get a meeting set up? It’ll be good to sit down around a table to hash out the details instead of texting,” Harper said.
“Tomorrow morning. Here. I thought a coffee meeting would be apropos.” Allison’s smile was energetic and as close to easy as it had been since they’d arrived. The sound of men’s voices carried closer. Bennett came around the corner first, his and Harper’s gazes melding.
“Perfect,” Harper said.
Darren chucked their empty beer bottles into a recycling bin in the pantry. “What’s perfect?”
“Allison has set up a meeting with a couple of the base wives who are interested in helping get the business off the ground.” Harper examined Darren as subtly as possible. His face was flushed, from either the beer or the cool breeze, but the color gave him life and vibrancy, helping to offset his rumpled appearance.
“Bennett was telling me all about it. You’re doing something good in Noah’s honor. I think that’s pretty amazing.” Darren grabbed two more beers, uncapped them, and handed one to Bennett, clinking the necks. “To Noah.”
The Military Wife Page 18
