“Mommy issues, he hates himself because he’s only half-white, and he’s into making money?”
“YEP. Some demons never go away,” he admitted, clinking his whiskey glass off hers. “To those of us who never escaped them—may we survive.”
They both took a drink.
“Has he settled down with anyone?” she asked.
Why she cared, she had no clue. She’d never take his ass back. Once you burned her, she never wanted to see you again. Only, they had ties to each other. In New Orleans, you couldn’t walk away so easily. In a way, they were all one sick, twisted family—created in the belly of that beast.
Zayn knew the pity party was over.
“No. He’s aimlessly wandering like the rest of us until that day the bullet finds our brains.”
She got it.
In her business, that shit happened a lot.
Charlotte hoped he found his peace. She’d found a good portion of hers. That love she’d found…it was more than she deserved, and she knew it.
“I feel a favor coming on,” she said.
“If you keep your ear to the ground on Chesky Jensen, I’d owe you one, Charlotte.”
“Like the last one?” she said, laughing.
“I hear you let him off for coffee. You did that only one other time to my knowledge.”
“Well, you’re a big wall. I was too tired to climb it. We’re better as friends. I could tell I could trust you the second I saw you, my Native friend. I was right.”
He didn’t buy that.
The person she played for the world to see was NOT the soul she was inside. Charlotte was a good person underneath that slime ball façade.
They all were.
That was the irony of their lives and ‘Purgatory’. You were damned there whether you had a soul or not.
Look at him.
“I’ll listen for you, Zayn. I’ll keep my ears open, but Chesky…he’s dangerous. You know that poking at him is like waking a forty-year-old beast. He’s not one to take shots lightly. That’s how he got to be who he is.”
“I’m going to take him down. I’m going to end him.”
“I don’t doubt it. I’ll keep a lookout for anyone talking about him. I’ve got your back.”
He was grateful.
“Just be careful. You know how the dark side is in this town. If you put your nose where it doesn’t belong, you could get hurt.”
She was aware.
She’d been born into this mayhem. It was her destined way of life. She may look pretty, but the darkness devoured her whole.
She was that evil.
He dropped some money. “I know you say I don’t pay, but you should squirrel it away. You never know when you’ll need it.”
She laughed.
“Thanks, Zayn.”
He waved and headed out the door.
While he was feeling a little less volatile, he knew what he shouldn’t do.
Go home.
So, he caught a cab, headed to a hotel, and crashed for the night. He wasn’t fit for the dead.
Let alone the living.
* * * H U N T E R * * *
To say that she was worried would be an understatement. Stella was pacing the living room, waiting for him to return. When she finally sat, Rogue appeared.
“Want some tea?” he asked, knowing that while Zayn was away, someone had to keep an eye on her. If there was another shot at her, it would likely be at night.
“I’m worried. I can’t handle anything in my stomach,” she said.
He sat and Odin dropped his head on his lap.
“I need to go to ‘Purgatory’. Take me, please,” she said, staring right into his eyes.
“I can’t.”
“Please.”
“Stella, I really can’t. If the owner catches me in there, she will skin me and then take my scalp—which is ironic.”
“You don’t have to go in! I’ll go in. Just take me to the door.”
“No. I’m sorry, honey, but that’s a bad place, and the people who took you could be in there. We don’t know who else was hired.”
She wanted to cry.
“He needs me. I need him.”
His heart ached for her. Rogue, while silent, had a soft spot for women. It might have to do with how he was raised by a single mother.
He tended to relate to them a lot better than men. There was something about the strength they had that was comforting. It was one of the reasons he couldn’t be with Charlotte.
She was malleable.
She was weak.
He knew he couldn’t hold her up. He couldn’t hold her above the water when he was going under himself. She wasn’t good for him, and he wasn’t good for her.
Rogue knew that he needed someone stronger than him. He needed someone who would pull him back from the brink, keep him in line, and make him be accountable.
Charlotte…she was like a drug that weakened him.
“He needs you, too, but right now, he needs to chase this demon. You have to let him figure it out.”
“He’ll come home, right?” she asked.
“I don’t doubt it. He’ll find his way back after he works off the mad.”
She relaxed a little.
“I think I’ll make some tea and wait for him in his room,” she said.
Stella stopped by the couch and gave Odin a scratch behind his ears. Then she gave Rogue a kiss on the cheek.
“Thank you.”
He squeezed her hand.
“Stay in the house, Stella. If they take you, it’ll kill him. It’ll make him a mess.”
“I won’t leave.”
“Promise?” he asked, picturing her wandering the whole city asking people where ‘Purgatory’ was. They’d think she was bat shit insane.
“I promise. Can I take Odin?”
The dog lifted his head and actually gave her a doggy grin.
“Kiss ass,” Rogue muttered. “Take him. He’s a traitor.”
She laughed and headed into the kitchen. Rogue watched her the entire time. When she headed upstairs with her tea and his dog, he did the smart thing.
He set the alarms and security. If she left her room, he’d know.
Rogue knew what would happen if she went missing.
Screw ‘Purgatory’.
Hell would break loose.
* * * H U N T E R * * *
Three A.M
He felt someone standing over him as he slept. Rogue slowly slipped his hand to the gun beneath his pillow. As he moved, he pulled it free and pointed it at the intruder.
It was Stella.
She was crying.
Sitting up, she threw herself on him and wept a torrent of tears. Even Odin tried to comfort her.
“Shhhh, what’s wrong?” he asked, holding her as she sobbed.
“He didn’t come back. He’s not coming back.”
Rogue wished he could reassure her. They’d sent Zayn countless texts, and he wasn’t answering his phone. When he tried to track the man, his cell was off.
That said one thing.
Well, two.
He was hunting Chesky or he was bedded down—maybe not alone.
That he DIDN’T tell Stella.
“It’s okay, honey. He’s fine,” he said, lying.
“I want to go home. I know you said it’s dangerous, but I want to go home. I don’t want to be here anymore. He’s left me, and I’m scared of everything.”
He touched her face. “Stella.”
“Please take me home.”
While he didn’t want to risk her, she was sobbing and he was horrible at shit like this. “We have to clear it with Dakota.”
“Please.”
“I need to put some pants on. Can you turn around?” he asked.
She did, and she focused on Odin who was tailing her around the house. He kept licking her leg, trying to offer her peace.
Rogue pulled on his pants.
“Okay,” he said when he was decent.
/> Stella turned around. “Nice tattoos,” she said, still crying over Zayn.
“Thanks. It’s a hobby. Let’s go wake Dakota.”
After all, this was his team. Why should Rogue have this much fun alone at three in the morning?
At the fourth floor, they knocked.
“Come in,” he said, his voice sleepy.
“It’s us,” Rogue said.
When he opened the door, Dakota was in bed, Sarah was beside him, and it made Stella sob even more.
“Uh oh,” Dakota stated. “He’s not back?”
Rogue shook his head.
They knew Stella had to be terrified. She’d been abducted, and the only person she felt safe with was Zayn, and he was out acting like a dick.
“She wants to go home.”
Dakota let out a breath. “Stella, that’s not safe.”
“I don’t feel safe now. I’m scared.”
She was shaking.
They could see Zayn being gone was really hurting her. He was like her duck, and she was the duckling. Him saving her had imprinted on her, and she needed him.
“Rogue?”
“I’ll take her. I can get her out of here without anyone seeing us. Can you call her father and get him to clear the gate for a little while? I’ll get her to the door without anyone seeing us.”
“Thank you,” she said, holding Rogue’s hand like it was her lifeline.
“It’s okay, Stella. We get it.”
“The nightmares…”
Yeah, they all had them.
“Take her home,” Dakota stated. “I’ll get up now anyway and make sure our space is secured.”
“She can take Odin. He’ll keep her safe.”
That made it a little better.
“Watch your back.”
He would be fine.
Moving through the shadows was his specialty. He’d trust his ‘friends’ to have his back.
“Let’s get you dressed,” he said to Stella. “I hope you have something black.”
“I do.”
“Are you sure you want to leave?” he asked. “He’s going to come back.”
She had to go.
He’d abandoned her.
Her heart was broken.
“I have no choice.”
Yeah, and sadly, they didn’t think Zayn had one either. This was going to go bad.
How the hell could it not?
* * * H U N T E R * * *
Monday Morning
When the cab pulled up, the house was silent. It was still early, and he’d had a shower, ate something to dull that whiskey ache in his gut, and now he was ready to face the people he was stuck with until this out of control guilt trip was done and over.
He wanted more time to sulk, but he wasn’t willing to leave Stella alone all day. They may have killed Logan Best, as he tried to take her, but who knew who he told?
Plus, he knew she wouldn’t do well without him. She had to be scared, and that killed him. Only, he had to choose the lesser of the two evils.
Let her see him for who he really was and lose her, or stay away until he was in control and risk her being afraid.
Zayn, for some reason, trusted the two men he was tied to now for this job.
He believed they’d watch her for him.
Now he could go back on duty.
He had to be focused. The assault on her could happen again and at any time.
That infuriated him.
So, he went in, reset the alarm, and headed upstairs. When he got to his and Stella’s room, he knocked.
She didn’t answer.
Peeking his head in, he looked around. She wasn’t there. In fact, the bed was made, and her scent was missing.
“Stella?” he called.
No reply.
The bed and the pillows were cold to the touch, plus there was that eerie silence that scared him.
This wasn’t right.
He began panicking as he searched the bathroom for her. When he saw he was alone, he wanted to do some damage.
Then he saw it.
On the bed that they’d shared, made love on for the first time, and began a relationship, he found a folded note.
This was going to be bad.
He could already feel it.
So, he took it like a man and began reading it.
‘Mr. Thundercloud,
I’m going home. You left me here alone, and I was so afraid. You abandoned me when I needed you. You’re relieved of babysitting duties. I can take care of myself.’
He stopped reading as he looked around the room in a panic. Did she sneak out?
What the hell?
She was gone!
“Jesus! I’m going to lose my mind,” he mumbled. “Then kill those two men who were supposed to watch her.”
Oh yeah.
Heads were going to roll.
‘Since you didn’t care where I was, or to share with me what you were going to do, I’ll take that as a sign of how I fit into your life. It was great. Thanks for the sex. I see it meant nothing.’
He wanted to ball the note up and freak out. Only, he had to stay calm. He’d lost it enough the previous night. If he raged around now, he was going to lose any chance at fixing his shit.
‘I’ll see you around. Then again, you don’t really give a shit, so why bother.
S. Harrington.’
“Oh, if you think I’m going to take a ‘Dear John’ letter after I finally find you, then you’re out of your damn mind!” he muttered, heading out of the room. The bedroom doors were open, so he knew where they’d be.
The tension wracked his body, and he turned his head and all the vertebrae in his back cracked.
Someone was going to get hurt.
He could see it happening.
In the kitchen, he stormed into the room with one hell of a chip on his shoulder.
“Who allowed her to leave?” he raged.
All three of them looked up at him.
His focus wasn’t on Sarah, but the two men beside her. He had a bone to pick—or break into tiny pieces—he wasn’t sure yet.
Dakota opted to be the brave one. He didn’t know this man too well, but he had to hope he could contain that rage.
Well, better than he’d done the last two days.
“Hey, we can’t make her stay. We don’t hold people at gunpoint,” he began, and then realized something. “I don’t. These two do,” he said, pointing at Sarah and Rogue.
“You let her leave? Are you insane?”
“Yes, and no, I’m not. She wanted to go home. You left, she waited for hours until about three this morning, and then we let her go. You didn’t come back. That gave her a pretty clear sign, us too, that you weren’t going to be a team player.”
He let that part go.
He wasn’t a team player. None of them were before two days ago. They’d run their own lives, and now…this rag-tag family thing was on his last damn nerve.
Instead of going there, he went with the obvious.
“You let her leave by herself?” he raged.
“No, Rogue took her.”
Now the focus was on him.
“Thanks, Dakota.”
“You’re welcome. Batter up.”
Rogue knew what he needed to do. Any idiot could see that the big guy was smitten. If he’d given up his virginity after all these years, Stella had to be important.
This was going to suck.
“She came into my bedroom and woke me up.”
Zayn began getting red.
“Explain.”
“She was upset and I comforted her. She was scared shitless to be here alone, so I drove her there, escorted her to her bedroom, and then waited for her to invite me in. You know, to help heal her poor broken heart.”
Zayn nearly lost it.
Would she do that to him?
Would she break him like that?
He grabbed Rogue by the shirt. “I’ll make you bleed if you put one finger on her!”
/>
He held out his hand, and Sarah and Dakota both slipped him twenties.
“What is this?” Zayn raged.
Was this man insane?
Did he soften up so much that he’d lost his street cred?
“I bet that you’d stay away, sulk in your own self-pity, and then come back angry at us when you should be angry at you. They didn’t think you’d stay away all night and leave her side. I told them love isn’t real. Men don’t love. They leave.”
He shook him. “I really hate you.”
“Well, you made her cry, and I think you’re a dick. So, I guess we are even.”
“She cried?”
It was putting out his fire.
“A lot. All the way home, she kept asking what she did to you. Why you wouldn’t come back when you knew she was so afraid to be alone?”
Zayn dropped him.
“Why are you sabotaging the best thing that’s clearly ever happened to you? From the second you touched her to save her, she’s followed you around like you’re the next coming of Christ. You have a woman who actually believes in love at first sight, and she’s fallen for you. You should be celebrating. You’re about to be free from our hell.”
Only, that was his issue. Sweet Stella was too good for him, and he was scared shitless.
He felt worse.
“I caused all this.”
“Why?” Dakota asked. He didn’t get where the man was taking all of this.
“Chesky Jensen and Stella’s abduction…it’s all my fault.”
They didn’t get it.
They stared at him.
It looked they wanted him to explain.
“He crossed my path right after he killed my sister. I faced him down twenty years ago, and I should have killed him then. Instead, I wussed out, and I let him go. I couldn’t pull the trigger. I was naïve and weak.”
They listened.
“I could have stopped all of this if I hadn’t been afraid of taking a life.”
That was another reason he entered the military. He needed to get a backbone and stop being a pussy.
Atonement: The Hunter Mercenary Series (Book One) Page 20
