“Are you all right?” he asked.
Was he worried that now that they had returned she would regret that she had ruined herself? “Meg and I used to tip-toe by this house, making up stories of it’s haunting for Hanna’s delight.”
Nate rested his hand at her belly, his breath warm on the side of her neck. “Did you?”
She nodded. “It’s amazing that he’s made this a home. It was so neglected.”
“He must have seen the beauty underneath.”
She took in a deep trembling breath. “I can’t let anyone take it away from her. Meg has done so much for me. She deserves her happiness.”
His arm tightened around her waist. “No one will take it away from them, Beth. I swear it.”
And she could believe him…at least for a few moments. Nate slid off the mount and reached out to help her. Trustingly, she leaned forward. She savored the feel of his hands on her waist as images of their morning together flashed to mind. A magic touch. Memories of those fingers skimming up and down her body would haunt her for the rest of her life. The heat that infused her cheeks was more from attraction than embarrassment. Her feet were settled firmly on the ground, yet his hands lingered at her waist. Did he not wish this to end either? No, he was a man. He didn’t let his emotions get in the way.
“I will protect them,” he said.
“And who will protect you?” she whispered.
He leaned down and captured her mouth without answering. There, in front of the house, he kissed her, proving her completely and utterly wrong about his indifference. She sank into him, parting her lips as he deepened the kiss. Moments later, breathless, she pulled back.
“We could be seen,” she protested.
He kissed her again, a quick peck. “I don’t care.”
Startled, she studied his mysterious eyes. What was he saying? She could read nothing in his gaze. She pressed her hand to her chest, finding it hard to breathe. Hope pounded through her veins. Dare she demand he explain his words?
“Promise you won’t leave again.”
How could she? If she could save them…
“Beth,” Nate demanded. “Swear it. You will talk to me next time before you decide to run.”
“Nate.” She cupped the sides of his face. “You cannot risk your reputation for me. If I stay with you, I very well could destroy your family.”
“It’s amazing what aligning with a man of power can do.”
“I hardly think being your mistress will gain me favor in the courts.”
He stiffened. “Mistress.”
She flushed, trailing her hands down his chest and dropping her gaze to his neck. “I speak out of turn.” He’d never actually asked her to be his mistress, had he? But God help her, she would if it meant staying by his side, being in his bed. “I just assumed…”
“Assumed what?” he asked.
She peeked up at him through her lashes. “That you’d want to continue our liaison.”
Dear God. He didn’t. He had apparently found her lacking, one time had been enough. Horrified, she started to step back, but he wouldn’t let her. He gripped her upper arms and pulled her close.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I just assumed you’d want to continue.”
“I do,” he said, sounding frustrated.
The relief she felt was immediate.
“But I won’t,” she continued, frowning. “Not if you marry. I wouldn’t do that to your wife, to Eliza.”
The air was cool, crisp, and she missed his heat.
“Eliza?”
He seemed confused. “She’s not the most thoughtful of people. Well, hadn’t been during my coming out in London. But she still deserves a faithful—”
“Beth, what the hell are you talking about?”
“I just assumed…the way you were together…” Oh hell, she was making a muck of it all. “I just assumed you’d marry Eliza. She’s quite beautiful, and you’re obviously good friends.”
Nate released his hold and swore under his breath. “I’m not marrying Eliza. I told her before we left that no relationship would ever bloom between us.”
The rising sun cut through the trees, sending brilliant rays across the grass.
“Oh.” Beth hated the thrill of relief she felt, knew it was wrong to celebrate over another person’s loss, but couldn’t quite help herself. The thought of Nate and Eliza together, the thought of Nate with any woman, made her ill.
“Beth.” He slid his hand under her chin, tilting her head back and forcing her to make eye contact. “I’m not marrying Eliza and you will not be my mistress.”
Perhaps she wasn’t stunning, no countries had gone to war over her beauty, but she certainly never thought she’d have to beg someone to take her as his mistress. “Nate, perhaps I wasn’t to your liking, but if we try again—”
“Bloody hell, Beth,” Nate snapped. “You won’t be my mistress because you will be my wife.”
She wouldn’t have been more surprised if lightning had branched from the sky and struck her dead. “You’re mad! Completely and utterly mad!”
“Why not?” He didn’t pace, merely stared her down, daring her to answer with those fierce eyes.
“Because…because…I’m wanted for murder!”
He shrugged, looking completely unconcerned. “And most of London thinks I murdered my first wife. In their eyes, I suppose we’d get on rather well together.”
She slapped her palm against his chest. “Do be serious, Nate.”
“Go.” He tucked a loose lock of hair behind her ear, his fingers trailing down the delicate line of her jaw. “Before I throw you over my shoulder, return to that cottage and show you exactly how much you pleased me this morning.”
She hesitated only a moment, the temptation strong. Heated and aching, she turned and raced toward the servant’s door before she did something that would surely ruin her for good.
The kitchen staff was already up and about when she entered. The few maids starting morning tea looked at her curiously, yet not one questioned her motives for being up and about so early. Surely they noticed her disheveled state, breathlessness and rosy cheeks. Thank God she’d left her bag by the creek. She averted her gaze and headed up the back stairs. Word had gotten around the estate that she and Meg were friends and the staff treated her with an aloof wariness that she felt even from rooms away.
But thoughts of the staff were the least of her worries. Be his wife? Make everything legal? Nate had been a gentle lover. Demanding, yes, but caring in a way she’d never experienced before. She knew, finally, why so many women succumbed to their base needs. She opened the door to the boy’s room and peeked inside but all four still slept soundly. They’d been up late into the night, enjoying the activities and the gathering. A soft smile touched her lips. Yes, they were unruly at times, but she cared about them deeply. No. She didn’t care about them…she loved them.
She loved them and they had no idea what was truly out there. They knew something was different about their father. But children had the ability to forget, live in the moment, and enjoy life even with its perils so close at hand. The boys had been so happy last night…carefree, innocent. The trip had been a revelation for all. They deserved peace.
As she looked over their pure, sleeping faces she knew she was putting them in danger by staying here. How could Nate not see that? Frustrated, she headed to her room. More importantly, how could she possibly stay knowing she might get them killed? If she married Nate, she could ruin them all. She pushed open the door to her small chamber.
“Good morning,” Meg said softly.
Beth wasn’t exactly surprised to see her friend sitting in the chair near the window. Worry, confusion and interest swam in the woman’s eyes.
“I’m sorry if I worried you.”
Meg shook her head. “I knew Nate would find you. He has excellent tracking capabilities.”
Of course, because he was part wolf. A regal yet deadly animal. Why was it becoming e
asier to believe? Beth closed the door behind her, hesitant and nervous. They’d been gone for hours. She didn’t want her friend to think the worst of her. The only person’s respect she valued was Meg’s.
“You shouldn’t have waited up.”
Meg’s brows drew together. “I wanted to make sure you were all right.”
“Nate…” She flushed. “Lord Brimley found me before any harm was done.”
But that wasn’t exactly true. She’d been pulled apart and put back together into someone she no longer recognized, didn’t understand. Things had changed and life was suddenly worthwhile once more. And that terrified her. She didn’t want to feel again.
“Beth,” Meg sighed, looking resigned. “You can call him Nate in front of me.”
Beth shook her head, sinking onto the edge of the bed. “I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t care about him. I shouldn’t have feelings for him.”
“You care about him,” Meg said softly, gently. “You’re attracted to him. There’s nothing wrong with that. He’s a rather handsome man. Those intense eyes, those strong hands…”
“He asked me to marry him.”
Meg’s lips parted in surprise.
Beth frowned, attempting to remember what exactly he had said. “Well…more told me I would marry him than asked.”
“And will you?”
“He doesn’t love me. Just once I’d like to have a husband who loves me.” Beth gave her a wobbly smile. “But he’s honest and that counts for something, doesn’t it?”
“Beth, he cares greatly for you.”
“Is that enough?” she asked, glancing toward her small window where the brilliant morning sun shone brightly. “I could love him, Meg. But I don’t trust my own feelings. Look what happened with my husband… I trusted him too.”
“Oh Beth.” Meg reached across the small space and lay her hand upon Beth’s knee. “You’re one of the smartest women I know. Your instincts are spot on.”
She released a bitter laugh. Meg was her friend, of course she wouldn’t say anything to worry her even more. “Then how did I end up with my husband?”
“Tommy!” John yelled loud enough for Beth to hear through the walls. “Give that back!”
The boys had woken. “My wards call.”
She started to stand, but Meg pressed her hand to her thigh, preventing her from leaving. “Think back, my dear, and I bet you’d believe otherwise about you and your husband. You didn’t listen to your instincts, but they were there. You had warning signs, did you not?”
Beth shifted, uncomfortable. She felt like a child being reprimanded in church for not paying attention. Her friend was too astute. Meg knew her well.
“I don’t say it to make you feel stupid. You were so hungry for love that you ignored your instincts. They were there, you felt them, but you wanted so badly to see a dream, a fantasy, just as I’d seen the signs with Mathew.” Meg laughed. “I can’t believe I wanted to marry that man.”
“You were young,” Beth offered. She had never liked him, but Meg could see nothing but perfection when she’d fallen for Mathew who had told her he loved her, then abandoned her when he’d moved to London those years ago.
“As were you, Beth. In fact, you were younger than me. You know better now.”
“Do I?” Beth wasn’t so sure. “Because I feel like an idiot. A complete and utter fool.”
She’d lost her rational mind once, letting her feelings take control so she didn’t know right from wrong. Would she do it again? She’d followed her heart and look where it had led her…near ruin.
“Nate isn’t Christopher, Beth. And you’re not the same woman you were those years ago.”
She closed her eyes, letting Meg’s words sink into her cold, empty heart, wanting them so badly to be true.
“You can trust your instincts,” her friend added. “You can trust him. If you want a relationship with Nate…”
Beth took in a deep trembling breath. What were her instincts telling her? With Nate it wasn’t just about attraction. No. She recognized a kindred spirit. A man haunted by himself, his past. But together…could they have a future? Dare she allow herself to dream about a life with Nate? Could she remarry? Be a mother to his boys?
“Meg, if Hanna is right, and my husband is still alive…then I’m still married.”
Her friend blanched. “Dear lord, I hadn’t even thought about that.” She shook her head. “We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. As Grayson says there is always a way to get what you want.”
If she was speaking of divorce, Beth knew as well as Meg that the courts would never allow it. “Meg—”
“I have good news,” Meg interrupted, no doubt knowing where Beth was headed. “A publisher in London is interested in our book. My information on the local flowers and your beautiful paintings. Both our names will be on the cover, Beth!”
Beth gave her friend a wavering smile. “That’s wonderful.”
But it wasn’t wonderful. Beth didn’t want her name to sully Meg’s work. She knew how important that book was to her friend.
A soft knock sounded on the door.
“Yes?” Meg called out.
Beth took in a deep breath, going to the window and looking out onto the dying gardens. She needed the interruption. The door opened and a maid peeked inside. “They’re asking after you, miss, in the parlor. You’ve a visitor.”
Meg frowned. “A visitor for me at this early hour?”
“No my lady, for Mrs. Church.”
A cold chill raced down Beth’s spine. Slowly, she turned away from the window.
“A visitor?” Meg darted a nervous glance her way. “Impossible.”
No one knew Beth was here.
Meg stepped closer to the maid. “Is it the constable?”
The maid shook her head. “No, miss. It’s a man claiming to be Mrs. Church’s husband.”
****
“I’ll kill him,” Nate said softly.
He stood in the foyer, staring through the doorway that led into the parlor where Beth’s husband strolled casually about the room as if he belonged there. As if he had nothing to hide. No one to fear. In that moment Nate fully felt as if he could walk in there and murder the man who was supposed to be dead. Murder him without pause, without conscience, without second thought.
“You can’t.” Grayson glanced back, looking as thrilled as Nate to see Beth’s husband. “They’re married, and as such, he basically owns her.”
Nate’s hands curled. The thought of anyone owning Beth made him irate. The man had stifled her fire, her passion, her ability to speak her mind without repercussion. She didn’t deserve what she had gone through, no woman did. He couldn’t erase her past, but he sure as hell could make sure she didn’t have to repeat it.
“He doesn’t own her anymore.”
Grayson rested his hand on Nate’s shoulder. “Under the eyes of God, under English rule…yes.”
Hell, he’d known the man still lived, even if Beth hadn’t wanted to believe it. Nate tore his gaze from Beth’s husband to glare at Grayson. “That’s shite, and you know it.”
Grayson pressed his hand against Nate’s chest, holding him back. He sensed Nate was about to surge forward. Always rational, he drove Nate insane at times. “Of course I know it, but it doesn’t matter.”
“I’ll kill him.”
Grayson sighed. “You can’t. Killing him will do no good. Besides…there is always divorce.”
Beth’s husband turned from the fireplace where he stood, and smirked. Nate’s hackles rose. The bastard could hear their conversation. Nate, more than anyone, knew how attuned his senses would be. He could hear them even from across the room and he found their conversation amusing.
Nate’s right eye began to twitch. “You know as well as I that divorce would never be granted.”
Grayson flicked an annoyed glance at Beth’s husband. He, too, knew the man could hear them. “There are ways to get what you want legally. Always. Especially when you
have money. And if you can’t do it legally, then yes…there are other ways.”
Beth’s husband looked away, obviously annoyed with Grayson’s response. It did little to soothe Nate’s soul. The only way he’d feel better was with the man dead…and this time buried in the ground. If he actually thought Beth was leaving with him, he’d find out soon enough how very wrong he was
“Shall we?” Grayson said, starting toward the parlor. Nate fell reluctantly into step beside him, forcing his feet to keep pace when all he wanted to do was rush ahead and attack. “There is one good thing…Beth will no longer be wanted for murder with her husband alive and well.”
“I’ll kill him,” Nate repeated the only words that mattered.
Grayson sighed again. “This is why vampires are more advanced than werewolves. We are more civilized. Even in war.”
Nate didn’t bother to respond to his ridiculous comment. It took everything in his power, every bit of reserve not to change into a wolf, and lunge for Brockwell’s throat. He was dressed smartly and cleanly for a man who’d been dead…and poor. Fitted jacket, polished Wellingtons, silken neck cloth. Where had he gotten the money for such clothing? He was a handsome man, and Nate could see why a young woman barely out of the nursery would think him charming. Damn him, he’d used Beth, knowing she would be grateful for the attention.
Brockwell smiled slowly, tauntingly. “I suppose I should thank you for keeping my wife well protected while I was indisposed.”
Nate growled. He didn’t know how long he could last before he changed into a wolf out of sheer anger. And changing in the middle of the day in Grayson’s home would be disastrous, especially with his emotions running high. He would be hard-pressed to control himself.
“Indisposed?” Grayson queried. “Where, exactly, were you? Odd that you’d disappear like that with no word to your wife.”
Nate had met the former Lord Brockwell a time or two. A small mouse of a man who had been more interested in his books than his title. He’d died without heir and his handsome and charming nephew had gained the title.
“Well, I was unconscious for some time.” He drew his fingers along the mantel, picking up a porcelain vase and looking it over as if he had all the time in the world. “When I awoke, it was to find my dear wife gone.”
A Night of Redemption (The Night Series Book 2) Page 24
