by Annie Bryant
“Well, here we are,” Patrice announced. She hopped off her bike and turned into the driveway entrance lined with thick shrubbery.
“Uh, cool, but where’s the barbecue?” Dillon asked. He didn’t see a grill anywhere, let alone a house.
“This way.” They heard Patrice shout. She jumped back on her bike and as she peddled away shouted back, “Uhhh…you might not want to get off your bikes quite yet.”
The Cods followed Patrice down a long road covered in crackly white seashells, until the driveway became a large circle with a lovely courtyard of flowers in the middle. Kiki’s house wasn’t just a house—it was a mansion…on the beach!
A classic Cape Cod style, Kiki’s house was sided in gray cedar shingles, and the trim and shutters were painted a rich, creamy white. There was a main house, and then another smaller (not even that small) house next to a swimming pool that looked like it was falling into the ocean.
“I think we just landed in Disneyland,” Dillon quipped.
“They’re here! They’re here!” sang a voice from the porch. “Kiki’s friends, do come in. Kiki has so been looking forward to this barbecue.” Kiki’s mother and father were standing by the front door looking like they had just stepped off a magazine page.
Mrs. Underwood had on a bright lime shift dress with tiny watermelon-colored turtles embroidered on it. Mr. Underwood was wearing blue-and-white seersucker pants with a white shirt. His perfectly brown wavy hair had been combed straight back (and didn’t move at all), and neither did Mrs. Underwood’s wavy blonde bob.
Katani gave them both a fashion A-. If only they would let their hair loose, she might up it to an A+.
Katani was a little embarrassed because her Salty Cod team was somewhere around a D-…. They looked like they had literally been purged from the sea and dragged in with by a fishing net. They were sweaty, dirty, and definitely not dressed to impress.
“Boy, do I feel like a fish out of water,” Charlotte whispered to Katani.
“Ha ha,” Katani replied dryly as Mrs. Underwood waved them closer.
“Well, let’s not be strangers, everyone. I’m Kiki’s mom but you can call me Sienna, and this is Dexter, Kiki’s father.”
“I believe I met some of you at the school talent show.” Dexter held out a beefy hand to each of them to shake. “When I filmed Kiki’s act,” he reminded them.
Charlotte, Katani, and Nick nodded and exchanged looks, unsure if they were really expected to say, “Hello, Sienna and Dexter. Thanks so much for inviting us to your mansion.”
“Now, who’s been here before?” asked Sienna Underwood with an expectant smile on her face. Katani wasn’t sure what fantasy world Kiki’s parents lived in where they thought she regularly invited over the kids from AAJH. Didn’t they realize that Kiki only hung out with the Queens of Mean and various upperclassmen that she deemed cool enough?
When it was determined that this was a first-time visit for all the Salty Cods, Mr. Underwood insisted on giving them the “grand tour” and Mrs. Underwood went to check on the caterers they’d hired to cook the barbecue so that they could “enjoy their time with their daughter and her friends.”
“Wow, I feel like we are on a movie set!” Nick exclaimed to Charlotte and Katani.
“Yeah, a movie called The Empress of Mean Has a Barbecue,” shot back Katani.
“Katani!” gasped Charlotte. “You need to jump in that pool and cool off…now!”
Katani sighed. “You’re right, Charlotte. I don’t know what’s gotten into me.” Katani resolved then and there to put on a happy face and enjoy the party. Nobody likes a crankmonster at a party, she told herself.
Kiki’s house was luxurious, full of rooms and wings the likes of which Charlotte had seen only in magazines. There was a game room complete with a pool table, a pinball machine, and single-lane bowling alley. And the cherry on the sundae—the Underwoods had a small movie theater complete with red velvety chairs and a popcorn machine! Wait till Maeve sets her eyes on this! Charlotte imagined her friend having a total fantasy breakdown.
Across the hall, Mr. Underwood ushered them into a room filled with CDs, speakers, and recording equipment from the floor to the ceiling. From the way Mr. Underwood went on and on about his collection, it was clear he loved his job as a music video producer. Riley would be in seventh heaven when he saw this, figured Charlotte when she caught sight of all the technical equipment.
Patrice was pumped to check out the gym and sauna, and Dillon was impressed with the greenhouse and connecting sunroom. He said it reminded him of “a small jungle where tigers might roam.”
But Charlotte’s favorite place was a quiet meditation room overlooking the ocean. She had never even heard of one of those before, but concluded that when she grew up, no matter how small her house, she would dedicate a little corner for her to unwind, think her deepest thoughts, and record them in her journal.
Katani went out of her way to tell “Sienna” what a beautiful job she had done decorating. Kiki’s mom was very pleased and described to a fascinated Katani how she chose all the different fabrics, and how she picked soft colors and patterns “so no matter what room anyone goes in they will feel happy and content.” Katani was impressed with Sienna’s decorating flair and how nice she was being to “Kiki’s little friends.”
“Now, I hope you kids brought your suits, ’cause I heard this was supposed to be a pool party,” Dexter informed them when they had concluded the tour.
The Salty Cods couldn’t wait to play in the Underwoods’ beautiful swimming pool overlooking the Atlantic Ocean.
“There’s something so übercool about the idea of having two kinds of water right in your backyard,” Katani said.
“Whoa, Dexter, killer water slide, dude! And a jacuzzi, too? Sweeeeet!” an enthusiastic Dillon complimented his new pal Dexter.
Everyone rushed to change into their suits and, as they ran outside, the sight of Mr. Underwood doing a huge cannonball into the pool caused them all to cheer.
“You are the man, Dexter!” Dillon shouted as he ran up the water slide ladder. Charlotte, Katani, and Patrice opted to unwind in the Underwoods’ jacuzzi. As the scent of delicious barbecue grew stronger in the air, Charlotte began to think that this party at Kiki’s was turning out to be pretty cool after all. There was just one thing: Where was everybody else?
CHAPTER
12
Mermonster from the Blue Lagoon
First of all, Beach Barnacles, this is the pool!” Kiki gushed, doing a half spin in front of the pool. “But I like to call it the lagoon. It’s not much, but to me, it’s summer.”
Chelsea felt her antisnob reflex kicking in. Who calls their pool a lagoon? Annoyed, she snapped a picture of Kiki posing by the swimming pool.
Kiki insisted on giving the weary group of Barnacles a complete private tour of the “mansh” as she called it. As the Barnacles followed Empress Kiki around, roaming from beautiful room to more beautiful room, Chelsea had to admit that the house gave off a very welcoming feel. And, of course, Kiki’s bedroom with its four-poster bed, powder blue walls, and spectacular view of the ocean was to die for.
Maybe Kiki will let me lie down on her princess bed for a few minutes, a suddenly exhausted Chelsea thought fleetingly. Kiki must have read her mind because the Empress kicked off her sandals and flopped down on the end of the bed, sighing. “It’s so relaxing lying here and staring at the water….”
“Kiki, can we go swim now? I’m so hot,” pleaded a yawning Avery. A chorus of “me too”s followed.
“Why didn’t you just say so in the first place?” a miffed Kiki said as she hopped off the bed and led them down to the pool house to grab towels.
Before they could join the Salty Cods in the pool and jacuzzi, who should show up but the Cranberry Boggers—looking a little scattered and out of breath.
“So sorry we’re late,” an out-of-breath Fabiana apologized as she sidled up to Ben. “Finding clues, you know? Tricky stuff.”
Ben nodded. “Totally hear that. How’d your day go?”
Chelsea had to bite her cheeks to keep from laughing. Her brother was clearly taken with Nick Montoya’s sister.
Fabiana shrugged and said coolly, “Fine. Totally normal. How about your day?”
Ben gave her one of his cool-guy looks and replied, “You know. Same. All things fab. Just did a lot of scavenger-hunt stuff, mostly.”
“Cool. Cool,” said Fabiana.
“Nice pool,” Ben commented, gesturing toward Kiki’s “lagoon.”
“Nice? It’s absolutely Lives of the Rich and Famous!” said Patrice, making her way to her fellow captains wrapped in one of the pale yellow beach towels the Underwoods had handed out. “A seriously welcome sight after a long day of serious scavenger hunting! I gotta have a swim…now!” Patrice threw off her towel and dove into the pool.
“Scavenger hunts take it right out of you…don’t they?” Ben agreed in a somewhat higher than normal voice.
“They sure do….” Fabiana said, fanning herself with her hand.
“And now it’s time to chil-laxxx and have fun!” Maeve announced, cutting her leader short before she could give anything away.
After a day spent in long, thick, heavy fabric (that, puhleeze, did not breathe at all!), Maeve was more than ready to chill out in Kiki’s pool. From the way Riley, Danny, Isabel, and even Betsy were dashing toward the changing rooms, Maeve could tell she wasn’t alone.
Charlotte and Katani were already kicking back in the hot tub drinking the tastiest frozen drink, an icy blend of pineapple and coconut juice with whipped cream and a cherry on top. Dexter (Charlotte simply adored that name) called them Pineapple Dreams, “In tribute to one of the Underwoods’ favorite vacay places—Hawaii!” he’d explained as he handed out the yummy-looking concoctions to the thirsty Cods.
“I love the way Mr. Underwood talks. It’s like he’s a TV spokesperson or something,” Katani observed in between slurps.
“What’s up with the Beach Barnacles? They aren’t even swimming,” a suddenly curious Charlotte observed. “Have you ever seen Avery Madden pass up on a pool?”
“Are you kidding? That girl would go swimming in the North Pole for Christmas,” Katani joked. They watched Avery, who instead of swan-diving off the board (her usual plan of attack) was dangling her feet in the water.
“Ave, better get in line,” yelled Yurt and waved her over to the buffet table.
“The Barnacles are circling that table like a bunch of piranhas waiting for prey,” Katani quipped.
“It’s like they’ve been lost in the wilderness and are ready to sit down to their first meal in weeks!” Charlotte laughed.
“Would you look at Maeve and Betsy?” Katani pointed to the two girls frolicking in the deep end. “I’ve never seen those two swim so fast—not even in gym class.” The two Boggers, along with their extremely energetic teammates, Riley, Danny, and Isabel, were playing a spirited game of Marco Polo.
“It’s like we’ve landed in upside-down land, Katani,” Charlotte noted, as she sank deeper into the jacuzzi. “We did so much biking today that all I want to do is sit in this hot tub and reeeeelax.”
“Cheers to that!” agreed Katani. “I am barely mooo-ving,” she mimicked Mr. Moore.
Suddenly, they both sat straight up as a creature emerged from the water before them. At first, the creature appeared to have Ariel of The Little Mermaid qualities: long ravishing red curls, alabaster skin, turquoise bathing suit. But when the creature wiped the hair out of her face, Katani and Charlotte cringed in horror.
It wasn’t a mermaid—it was a mermonster…formerly known as Maeve. Streaks of tan and pink ran down her cheeks and neck. Her black-rimmed eyes made her look like the ghost of a redheaded panda.
“What happened to you?” a confused Charlotte asked.
“Huh? What do you mean?”
“Maeve, I say this with love.” Katani shook her head. “You look terrible! Like the creature from the black lagoon! You better find a mirror.”
Maeve tossed her soaking hair back and tried to flash her friends a confident smile, which to Katani and Charlotte still came across as bad-movie creepy. Maeve reached for a towel to wipe away a little black gunk from under her eyes, but that only made the look worse. Now she looked like a crazed raccoon, and there was a giant smudge on the Underwoods’ designer towel.
“Gosh, Maeve, I don’t remember you wearing makeup this morning,” Katani said suspiciously. “You, uh, must really know how to apply it well, huh? Cause I gotta say, you looked pretty natural.”
If Maeve had learned anything from her improv classes it was how to think on her feet. “Oh, you know me,” she said jokingly. “Always trying a new look. Uh, gotta go!”
She slithered out of the pool and made a beeline for the bathroom in the pool house. Maeve was determined to look presentable as quickly as possible. She didn’t want Dillon or Riley, her former and present class crushes, to see her like that. Besides, she could feel Charlotte’s and Katani’s penetrating eyes following her as she ducked into the bathroom and she didn’t want to answer any more questions about her day.
When she emerged a few minutes later, Sienna Underwood waltzed over to the pool wearing high heels. “Yoo-hoo! Dinner time!” she called out as she rang a huge bell to get everyone’s attention.
“Mom!” an embarrassed Kiki groaned in frustration.
“What, dear? The dinner bell is an Underwood family tradition.” Sienna Underwood laughed. “Your grandmother rang it, my grandmother rang it, and someday, when you’re married with kids, you’ll ring it too.”
“I guess Kiki’s human like the rest of us,” joked Avery to the BSG who had gathered in their towels. “Now let’s eat…. I’m so hungry I could snarf that whole table!”
As Kiki looked like she might drop dead out of sheer mortification, the BSG shared a secret glance. It was a little fun to see the Empress of Mean so positively unglued.
Barbeque Underwood Style
The barbecue was a monster hit. Dillon’s eyes popped open at the corn on the cob, grilled chicken, corn bread, coleslaw, and burgers. Avery and Yurt were creating space aliens out of hamburger buns and corn cobs, Isabel and Katani were discussing Mrs. Underwood’s fabulous interior-decorating choices, and everyone was basking in the orange glow of the setting sun. Charlotte was thrilled to be with all her friends again in such a gorgeous locale and couldn’t wait to find out about all the adventures the other teams must have had as they hunted for clues.
“Hey, the teachers are here now,” Avery said as she waved. The Moores had arrived toting a cow-shaped cake for dessert, and Ms. O’Reilly brought a plate of veggies that Yurt immediately raided to make tentacles for his space alien.
“We came so close to getting a fox.” Charlotte walked over to Isabel and Katani. “Patrice had us running through the woods to find the little guy.”
“Boy, did she ever,” giggled Katani.
“We got a fox!” blurted Isabel.
“Oooh, let’s see!” Charlotte urged.
But then Isabel remembered that her picture wasn’t a real fox, it was a prop fox, which might win them the point in the end, but certainly would unearth a whole Pandora’s Box of questions from the Salty Cods that she did not want to get into. Where did you see a fake fox? Why were you there? What were you doing? No, Isabel clearly couldn’t risk it.
“Sorry, guys…I am sworn to secrecy,” she said, feeling uncomfortable that her words bordered on a fib.
“Oh, okay,” Charlotte answered softly, suddenly worrying that maybe the Cods were behind. “How about you guys?” she asked Chelsea.
Chelsea really wanted to show off her ten photos. She was quite proud that she had accomplished finding all the bonus items on just the first day. But she also knew that finding all ten things on the first day looked a little suspicious. How could she have possibly found everything between looking for clues? So Chelsea just shrugged and said coyly, “Us too. Sworn t
o secrecy. Go team!” She tried to laugh but it came out kind of weak.
“Um, I’m going to go get seconds,” Isabel announced. “Anyone want anything? No? Okay, then.” She quickly got up and hustled away.
“I’m, um, going too,” Chelsea said, following Isabel.
Charlotte was all for team spirit, but her classmates were acting so weird. As Isabel walked away, Charlotte, whose brain was wired for detective work, spotted a large odd-looking blue glob adhered to her shoe and some yellow splotches on her sleeve. She had no idea where the Cranberry Boggers’ journey had taken them, but Charlotte had a feeling that they had gone on a very different kind of scavenger hunt than she had been on.
“Here, they brought out watermelon!” Isabel said as she and Chelsea came back with extra slices for Charlotte and Katani.
“Watch out for flying seeds,” Chelsea warned, just as Dillon let one loose.
“That’s a new record!” Avery whooped. “Let me try again.”
Thankfully, Sienna Underwood stepped in the middle of the seed-spitting contest with a box of graham crackers in one hand and bags of marshmallows and chocolate bars in the other. “Who likes s’mores?” she asked, and watermelon seeds were completely forgotten.
As everyone licked their sticky fingers, Dexter Underwood stood up. “Now, who here is up for a rousing game of water polo? We’ve got a net we can put up across the pool!”
The Cranberry Boggers had their hands up before anyone. Charlotte couldn’t figure out how they were so lucky to have gotten their second wind. She was absolutely zonked. Just then she learned she had an unexpected ally.
“I am one hundred percent POOPED!” Avery declared. I couldn’t serve another volleyball today if you paid me.” She received a round of weird looks from everyone who was not on Nauset Beach to witness her impressive display earlier. “I mean, a volleyball other than the zero I served already, which was my limit.”
