by Drew Hunt
David knew he ran pretty much on auto-pilot during the times he wasn’t with Bud. Classes seemed to fly by, his mind never totally focused on what was happening. But no one seemed to notice he wasn’t giving all of himself as he usually did. He still interacted with his students, trying to enthuse them into the joys that lay ahead of them in the world of the sciences. He still attended meetings with fellow faculty members. Then there were the usual after-school conferences with parents who wanted to know why their child wasn’t doing as well in school as they would have hoped.
The weekend rolled round again and David had rushed home, declining the usual invitations to go out for a drink with his colleagues. Normally he wouldn’t be eager to get home and be alone in his empty house, but this was a weekend that Bud would be visiting. Since Bud had come into his life, the times he spent with the hunky Marine were filled with joy, laughter and love-making. Okay, he and Bud had never gone the whole way with one another, but David knew it wouldn’t be long before they did.
“Come on, David, come out for a drink. We don’t have to go with the others if you don’t want,” Corey, a fellow science teacher, said to David just as he was about to make his escape. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’d found yourself a man and were rushing home so you could have mad monkey sex with him all weekend.”
David blushed. Corey was one of the few people who knew he was gay. “Well, uh.” His blush increased.
“You have! You sly dog. Why haven’t you said anything before now?” Taking David by the elbow, Corey led him into an empty classroom and closed the door behind them. “I want details, and the more salacious the better.”
“Horn dog.”
“Yeah, well. Knowing your best friend has been getting some is almost as good as getting it yourself. Now come on, who is he, when am I going to meet him? And what’s he like in the sack?”
“Corey!”
“Stop being a prude, Dave, it doesn’t become you. Spill.”
“Uh, well, he’s not out, he can’t be because he’s a Marine.”
“Oh, you fucker. A member of the few, the proud.”
“Yeah.” David knew he shouldn’t say much more, Bud would be furious with him, but he was so excited at finally being able to share his good news, he found himself telling Corey everything. About how they met, how Bud was big, strong, a total take-charge, but still caring sort of guy.
“Girl, you gotta bring him round to my place. He sounds too good to be true.”
“Well, uh. I don’t know. He has to be real careful about who knows. You have to swear that you won’t tell anyone about what I’ve just said.”
“Of course not, silly. But please, Dave, I have to meet this hunk.”
“I’ll see what Bud says. I’ll call you to arrange a meeting if he’s agreeable. But,” waving his finger at Corey, “no promises. I don’t ever want to rock the boat with us. It’s still new, delicate and—”
“Don’t let him make all the decisions. You have to put your own stamp on the relationship, too. Otherwise it will never work between you.”
“I know.”
Kissing Corey on the cheek, David left for home, a spring in his step. At last he’d told someone else about his amazing boyfriend, and how happy he made him.
Driving home, trying not to step too hard on the gas, David thought about the close but platonic friendship he and Corey had built.
In the beginning, David had hoped that he and Corey could make it as a couple. But both had finally agreed that they made much better friends than lovers. They were too similar, both hopeless romantics, crying at the drop of a hat whenever they watched a cute, sappy or sad movie together.
Pulling into his driveway, he saw Bud’s Jeep Wrangler already there. He’d given Bud a key to the house, so he was relieved to know his man hadn’t had to sit on the doorstep waiting.
Opening the side door, David had no more than stepped over the threshold before he was taken up in a massive bear hug, robbing him of breath.
“I sure have missed you.” David felt, more than heard, the deep voice as its owner’s chest resonated.
“Sorry I’m late. I got talking with—” The rest of David’s words were cut off by Bud giving David a firm lip lock, sucking out his tongue and generally sending David’s mind rocketing into orbit.
Finally releasing his man, Bud held him at arm’s length. “God, I’ve wanted to do that all week.”
“Uh,” David still hadn’t returned to earth.
Bud laughed. “I’ve made a start on supper. Thought you might like to try my meatloaf. It’s a secret recipe, known only to a very privileged few.”
David became aware that his house was filled with an array of most appetizing aromas. “I didn’t know you could cook.”
“There’s lots of things you don’t know about me.” Bud’s face changed just then, but he turned away before David had a chance to study it more closely.
“Smells great.”
“It won’t be ready for at least a half hour. Plenty of time for you to get changed, washed up, and…” Bud raised an eyebrow.
“You gonna come and help, especially with the and part?”
Bud’s face brightened into a wide smile. “You just try and stop me.”
The two raced into the back of the house, acting like children, but David didn’t care. Bud was with him, hopefully for the whole weekend, so all was right in his world.
* * * *
David was surprised at how tasty the meal was. He even asked Bud for the recipe, but the Marine remained tight-lipped.
“It’s a matter of national security.”
“Huh?”
“Aunt Gloria gave me the recipe once, and I promised never to share it with anyone.”
“Oh. I thought you didn’t have any family. Sorry, that was insensitive.”
“She’s not my real aunt. Gloria was a cook in one of the last group homes I was in. She’s the closest person I ever got to an adult relative. Least one that cared about me.”
David reached for and took Bud’s hand. He could have kicked himself for spoiling the happy mood they had been enjoying. “I’m sorry, Bud. Please let’s change the subject.”
“Thanks.”
“I don’t want you to get mad, worried or anything, but the reason why I was late home was because I was talking with a colleague of mine. He’s gay, too. I often go out for a drink to a local bar with some members of the faculty on a Friday, but when you came into my life, I—”
“Sorry, I could always come visit later.”
“Don’t you dare. No, what I was saying is I told a friend of mine that I had found a really wonderful, kind, awesome man and—”
“I told you never to say anything. Not to anyone!” Bud’s angry words took David by surprise.
“Sorry. I know you did, but Corey, he won’t say anything.”
“Jesus!” Bud got to his feet and began pacing. “I would be kicked out of the Corps with a dishonorable discharge at the least suggestion of—”
“I know that!” David surprised himself at how powerfully he’d spoken. He’d never stood up to Bud before. He’d remembered what Corey had said about not letting Bud make all the decisions. “I’m sorry.” Getting to his feet, David approached a surprised Bud. “Hon, I’d never ever do anything that would put your career at risk. I respect you way too much to do that. Corey is safe. I’ve known him for years. He won’t say anything. I promise, it’s okay.”
Bud put his arms around David and gave him a hug. “I’m sorry, babe. I shouldn’t have raised my voice like that. If you say he’s okay, then I trust your judgment.”
“Thanks. He said he wants to meet you, but I said I’d have to ask you first. We don’t have to, he need never know anything more about you, I didn’t even tell him your last name, where you were based. Nothing that could hurt you.”
Tightening his hold, Bud nuzzled the side of David’s neck. “I don’t deserve you.”
“Silly,” David said, turning
to kiss Bud. “Now come on, the food’s getting cold.”
During the meal they agreed to pay Corey a visit the next day. David reassured Bud again that Corey was all right, he was a better cook even than David, and would relish the opportunity to show off his talents. “So you wouldn’t even be seen out in public.”
“That’s okay. You’ve convinced me that it’ll be all okay.”
“Can I make one tiny little request about tomorrow?”
The almost shy tone in David’s voice caused Bud to raise an eyebrow.
“Will you wear your fatigues?”
Bud laughed. “You really have a thing for me in uniform, don’t ya?”
“Yeah. It’s just I know I can’t show you off to many people, let ‘em know what a gorgeous stud I’ve got. But…sorry, it was a stupid idea. I—”
“Hey, just so happens I did laundry yesterday and brought a clean set of fatigues with me.”
* * * *
“You sure you don’t want me to come in and help you choose? Corey’s got a real thing about what wine should be served with a particular meat.”
The two had pulled into the parking lot of a grocery store to buy a bottle of wine on their way over to visit Corey.
“I might look like a dumb nigger who don’t know nothing about fine wines, but I’m perfectly capable of picking something out that will go with what Corey’s cooking.”
David paled. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make it sound as though you didn’t have any social skills or—”
“No, Dave, it’s me who’s sorry. I think I’m still on edge over meeting your friend.”
“We can turn back, Corey would understand, and—”
“David, look at me.”
Turning, David gazed lovingly at Bud.
“It’s all cool, honestly. I’m just gonna go into the store, pick something out that’ll go with the pork medallions Corey said he was gonna grill, then we’re going to drive over to his place and have a great afternoon. Okay?”
David nodded. “Sorry.”
Bud shook his head before getting out of the Jeep.
David had been overjoyed at the opportunity to be able to show Bud off to his friend. He knew Bud wasn’t comfortable with the idea of other people knowing about them, but he’d gone along with it just because David had asked him.
“I don’t deserve him,” he said, starting to sniff back the tears that were threatening to fall. “Shit, I’m such a fucking crybaby.”
Reaching for the glove box, David hoped he’d find a tissue to dab at his eyes, not wanting Bud to know he’d been crying.
Pulling out a small box of Kleenex, David wiped his eyes and blew his nose. After replacing the box, he noticed an envelope had fallen to the floor, spilling its contents over the rubber mat. He knew he shouldn’t stick his nose into Bud’s business, but he couldn’t help seeing the title at the top of a sheet of paper. Suggested Palm Springs Itinerary.
A quick scan of the other documents revealed Bud had made reservations for two people at a hotel in Palm Springs. They were dated for two weeks’ time, David’s birthday.
Knowing Bud would be coming out of the store at any moment, David replaced the papers in their envelope and put it back in the glove box. He couldn’t remember telling Bud that his birthday was coming up, but realized he must have.
“Shit, if I’m not careful I’ll need more Kleenex,” David said, trying not to bust out crying again, but this time for totally different reasons.
“You okay?” Bud asked, startling David.
“Oh, uh, yeah. Miles away.”
“Right. I bought a Johannesburg Riesling. It’s not overly dry, but should be sweet enough to compliment the pork.” Bud handed over the wrapped bottle to a surprised David.
“I feel even worse about my comment of earlier.”
Bud gave David’s knee a quick squeeze before starting up the Jeep.
* * * *
David was relieved when the afternoon at Corey’s turned out to be a complete success. Bud was charming, even a little flirtatious with Corey, but he made it plain he belonged to David.
Once, when Bud had excused himself to visit the john, Corey turned to David. “Oh, my God! He’s gorgeous. You didn’t tell me he was African-American, though.”
“Does it matter?”
“No, not at all. Shit, does he have any brother Marines who he could introduce to me?”
David laughed. “Don’t think so.”
“Man, I’m jealous. And you can tell he’s, like, totally devoted to you.”
“And me to him.”
“Yeah. It’s about time you found someone, David. You’ve lived alone too long in that big house of yours.”
“I know.” David became more serious. “But I’m terrified he’ll get tired of me because of how clingy and needy I am. He could do a lot better than a plain boring old teacher.”
“Hey. Don’t you dare, David Grover. I’ll not have it, you hear?” Corey glared at his friend.
Bud chose that moment to come back out onto the deck. “What’s going on?!”
“Your boyfriend doesn’t feel worthy of you,” Corey said, giving David another hostile look.
“Corey!” David was horrified.
Bud shook his head before walking over to the lawn chair where David was sitting. “Come here.” Bud lifted David to a standing position before laying a soppy wet kiss on his lips. Stroking the side of David’s cheek, “You’re my man. Who else could put up with me with my crazy schedule, my need to keep us secret? You’re all I could ever ask for, and loads more beside.”
The semi-public show of affection was too much for David, who turned his face into Bud’s shoulder and began to cry softly. He felt Bud wrap his arms around him and rock him gently.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be such a crybaby. You deserve someone who doesn’t burst into tears at the least little thing.”
“Hush,” Bud soothed. “You’re a fucking fantastic guy. Gentle, kind and generous. Now come on, dry those beautiful brown eyes of yours.”
“They’re not beautiful,” David said, moving himself out of Bud’s embrace and wiping his eyes.
“Hey!” Bud said, flexing his arms, “if I say they’re beautiful, then you believe it, buster!”
That was all David needed to get him laughing.
“Yup, I’m officially jealous,” Corey said, eyeing the two.
“Aww. By the way, Corey wants to know if you could line him up with a brother Marine.”
“David!” Corey put his hands on his hips and glowered at his friend.
“Payback’s a bitch, bitch.”
* * * *
Corey kissed David on the cheek just before David got into the passenger seat of Bud’s Jeep.
“Thanks for having us over, man. I, no, we, really enjoyed ourselves.”
“Yep, sure did,” Bud added. “And aren’t I gonna get a kiss?”
David watched as Corey ran round the Jeep and laid a soppy kiss on Bud’s left cheek.
“I know what I’ll be jerking off to tonight,” Corey simpered.
“Too much information,” David told him. “I’ll see you back at the brain factory on Monday, okay?”
During the ride home, David closed his eyes and offered up a silent prayer of thanks that all had gone off okay. Except for his girlish crying jag. David winced at how much he wore his heart on his sleeve. He knew he’d have to toughen up, be more of a man for Bud.
“You okay there, stud?”
“Uh, yeah.” David opened his eyes. “Thanks for today. Corey really liked you.”
“I liked him, too. How come you and he never got together?”
“We’re too similar. Though you didn’t see it today, he’s just as much of a crybaby as me. Sometimes we plan a movie night in, both of us sitting on the sofa, a box of Kleenex between us crying our eyes out when the guy gets the girl in the final reel.”
“That’s sweet.”
“It’s stupid, and girly and—”
“I bet none of your fellow Marines bust out crying all the time.”
“Maybe not all the time, but I’ve seen plenty of so called tough guys turn to jelly when their girlfriend dumps them, or they get a letter telling them their pet dog back home has died.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Didn’t someone say something about how you’re not a real man if you can’t cry in front of another man?”
“Don’t know. But how many men cry when they watch a Budweiser commercial?”
“Huh?”
“You know, when the cute Clydesdale horses pull the cart with the barrels of Budweiser in them?”
“You cry at those?”
“Yeah. Told you I was pathetic.”
“David! You. Are. Not. Pathetic.”
“Sorry.”
Bud shook his head, but didn’t say anything more.
David continued to sit there, thinking about something that had been on his mind almost constantly since he and Bud had gotten together. The more he thought, the more determined he became. By the time they arrived home, he’d made up his mind.
“Bud?”
“Yeah?” the man asked, bent over the driver’s seat, finding something in back.
“Tonight, I want you to fuck me.”
“Wha—?” Bud hit the back of his head on the roll bar. “Shit,” he said, rubbing at his head.
“Oh, no!” David leaped out of the vehicle and ran to the driver’s side. “You okay?”
“Um, think so. Did I hear you right?”
“Yes. I would like you to make love to me tonight. It’s time.”
“Oh.”
The confidence David had felt moments earlier was rapidly evaporating. “But if you don’t want to, I—”
“No.”
David’s face fell.
“I mean yes I want to, your question was…shit, I’m gonna have a real bruise in the morning, not to say the mother of all headaches.” Seeing the distress on David’s face, Bud continued, “Sorry, babe, it’s just at this exact moment the blow to my head is kind of making it difficult to concentrate. But truly I would feel it an honor to make love to you.”
