Yours for Christmas

by Susan Mallery

  “If I don’t hear back from you by, um, New Year’s, I’ll know that you’re not interested. Or that you don’t agree. Or whatever.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  The words, quietly spoken, caused the nerves in her stomach to start doing laps.

  “I know. I’m getting to that. You need to not talk again, okay?”

  He nodded.

  She laced her fingers together and twisted them around. Was she a fool for thinking he could care about her? Were they too different? Was he too much the athletic superstar? She was just a single mom with a kid. And there was the weight thing. Did he think she was fat?

  She told herself to get out of her head and into the moment. She loved this man. If she wanted to have a chance with him, she had to tell him that.

  “I don’t know exactly what happened,” she began. “Why you disappeared. I know it has something to do with Chloe and me. Maybe you’re thinking you’ve gotten too close. That if you care, you could be hurt. If you do care, then that’s true. But it’s also true that you could hurt us, too.”

  She paused to gather her thoughts. She wasn’t sure how to convince him, but not trying was no longer an option.

  “I want to say that I loved Will desperately until he died, but that’s not true. We were drifting apart when he was killed. I don’t know if it was because he was gone so much or if we simply grew up and apart. But whatever my feelings, Will was a good man and I want his daughter to know that about him.”

  She found herself staring at the center of Kenny’s chest and forced her chin up until she was looking into his eyes. She couldn’t read anything there, but that was okay. She was going to get through this.

  “You’re right—I am a package deal. You’ll never be Chloe’s biological father and the possibility exists that if something happened between you and I, then you would be at risk of losing another child you’d come to care about. I know that has to be really scary. I want to tell you I know how you feel, but we both know I don’t. I can’t. But here’s what I do know. I know that you’re a wonderful person. You’re caring and gentle and funny and kind. You are the kind of person others admire. You make my heart beat faster whenever you’re around and you make me feel safe.”

  Heat burned on her cheeks, but she kept talking anyway. So what if she was embarrassed? She had to tell him the truth—they both deserved that.

  “I’m not like the models and actresses you’ve dated. I get that. I’m just a regular kind of person who lives in a small town. Nothing flashy. Nothing special. But I know what it’s like to be alone and I know what it’s like to want to belong.”

  Now for the hard part, she thought, wishing she was just a little more confident in his response.

  “Kenny, I’ve fallen in love with you. I’m pretty sure Chloe has as well. I want us to be together. I want to be the love of your life. I want...” She shrugged. “I want a lot of things. More kids. A dog. But mostly I want you. And I’m hoping you want me back.”

  She reached out to touch him, then dropped her hand to her side. The man hadn’t said a word. Sure, she’d told him not to, but did he have to pick this moment to listen? She couldn’t tell what he was thinking, but worried it couldn’t possibly be good.

  “That was all I had to say,” she whispered, returning her gaze to the center of his chest. “Please think about it. If you’re not interested, then you don’t have to do anything. If I don’t hear from you by New Year’s, I’ll get the message.”

  She looked into his blue eyes again. “I hope whatever happens, we can stay friends. And if it’s not me, then I really hope you find someone you can give your heart to. I want you to be happy, no matter what.”

  She turned to the door, then spun back. “Merry Christmas,” she said, and then she left.

  * * *

  KENNY SAT ALONE in the dark. Tomorrow was Christmas Eve. For everyone in town it was a magical time. The presents were bought, the dinners planned, and there was the promise of snow tomorrow night. What could be better?

  He hadn’t been out of his house in days, hadn’t seen anyone. The weekend had made that easy and the Score offices were closed today through Christmas. It gave him time. The question was, what was he going to do with it?

  Bailey had laid it all on the line when she’d come over on Saturday. She’d bared herself, heart and soul. All she’d asked was that he think about what she said. And he had. Endlessly.

  She said she loved him. Those words—how he wanted them to be true. He wanted all she had to offer. Her and Chloe and more babies and a dog. Yeah, it was a perfect picture. But was it real?

  Could he trust her? That was what it came down to. Was he willing to try again, to love, knowing he could lose it all? Chloe would never be his. If the worst happened, he would lose her, too.

  But the alternative was not to have her at all. It was to not try. To give up before he’d begun and that wasn’t who he had ever been.

  What was safe battled with what he needed as much as he needed air. The pain of not having wrestled with the potential of losing. The hours passed from night to dawn and he was no closer to an answer. But maybe that was because he’d always known how this was going to end.

  * * *

  “THAT WAS THE BEST!” Chloe crowed as they walked home, hand-in-hand, in the lightly falling snow. “The show and the day.”

  “I agree. It was magical.”

  Bailey walked next to her daughter as they made their way home from the annual performance of the Dance of the Winter King, followed by evening services at church. It was snowing, but not too cold. Or maybe they were warmed by the season itself.

  Her daughter smiled up at her. “This was the greatest Christmas Eve ever!”

  “Wow. Thank you. What was your favorite part?”

  “I don’t know. All of it. I loved the live nativity.”

  “Me, too.”

  Bailey smiled as she remembered the eccentric animals filling the manger next to the Baby Jesus. There had been goats, an elephant, a pony and a camel, all compliments of the Castle Ranch. This year there had also been the unusual addition of a small service dog, Cece. Her holiday sweater had kept her poodle-self warm, and she’d been up for snuggles and kisses. The rest of the manger animals had preferred to simply have their pictures taken.

  Afterward, she and Chloe had wandered through downtown, taking in all the decorations. Carolers had gone from store to store. Most of the businesses had stayed open to offer cookies and hot chocolate to singers and residents alike.

  After dinner, Bailey and Chloe had gone to see the Dance of the Winter King, a seasonal production with great music and dancing. Chloe had loved it all. Bailey had enjoyed it, too, but she’d also been aware that Kenny wasn’t with them.

  She hadn’t heard from him since she’d announced she was in love with him, and then had left his house. While she’d known that she might not get him to change his mind, she’d been hopeful. Okay, more than hopeful, she thought wistfully. She’d imagined him striding into her office at city hall and sweeping her into his arms, à la that old movie An Officer and a Gentleman. Or simply walking up to her somewhere in town and saying that while he couldn’t love her today, he thought he might be able to eventually.

  In her more sensible moments, she reminded herself that the obvious answer was he wasn’t interested. She imagined a politely worded note of “thanks, but no thanks.” Despite the fact that she’d said he didn’t have to respond, she’d never seriously considered there would be nothing.

  She reminded herself there was still a week to go. A week in which she could dream and hope. But come January first, she was going to go on those two diets she’d promised herself. One for the extra weight and the other for Kenny. She would figure out how to deal with both. And she was determined to be successful.

  Chloe leaned into her and yawned. “Is Kenny coming over tomorrow?”

  “I don’t know.”

  Because Bailey hadn’t said any
thing to Chloe yet. When her daughter asked, she said he was busy with the holidays. If there was even the slightest chance of it working out, then better for her daughter not to suffer needlessly.

  “He has to. We have presents for him under the tree. And you have something from him in your stocking.”

  “Do I?”

  She’d forgotten about that. What had he gotten her? And if he walked out of their lives forever, should she return it?

  They turned the corner and started up their street. Snow continued to fall. Neighbors walking home from the church service waved to each other. Calls of “Merry Christmas” filled the night.

  “I love our new house,” Chloe said sleepily. “And my bedroom, and my bed.”

  “I’m glad. I love it all, too.”

  Chloe looked up at her and smiled. “I love you, Mommy.”

  “I love you back, sweetie.”

  They walked to their house and started up the driveway. On the porch, something moved. Bailey stared, not sure what—

  Kenny rose and took a couple of steps toward them. It was dark and the porch light was behind him so she couldn’t see his face.

  A thousand questions crowded into her brain. Why was he here? Was it good news or bad news? Surely he wouldn’t break her heart on Christmas Eve, would he?

  He looked good, she thought, greedily taking in everything about him. If felt as if she hadn’t seen him in years, instead of days. He had on a long, heavy coat. Snow clung to his head and his shoulders. He held a Santa hat in one hand.

  “Kenny!”

  Chloe broke free and raced toward him. He caught her and lifted her up into his arms. Chloe hung on so tightly, Bailey wondered if she would ever let go.

  “We went to the live nativity and there was a poodle in the manger! Then we saw the Dance of the Winter King, which was so great. And then we went to church and now you’re here. We’ve missed you. You’re coming over for Christmas, aren’t you? Mom wasn’t sure, but you have presents.”

  Kenny kissed her cheek, then lowered her to the ground. He stepped toward Bailey.

  She stayed where she was. Snow fell all around them. She was probably freezing, but she couldn’t feel a thing except for the hope rising inside of her. The world was still, except for the beating of her frantic, hungry heart.

  “You were right,” he said quietly, staring into her eyes. “About all of it. I am afraid of what I could lose. How could I go on without you or Chloe around?”

  She wasn’t sure if she was supposed to answer, so she simply waited. Chloe came and stood next to her, but was also silent.

  He turned the Santa hat around in his hands. “I don’t bring much to the table. I’m kind of beat up from playing football. My knees are bad and my track record with relationships isn’t much better.”

  She wasn’t sure how those two thoughts related, but she was happy to keep listening. Because to her, it didn’t sound like he was saying goodbye.

  “The thing is,” he continued, staring directly into her eyes, “I’m in love with you.” He dropped his gaze to Chloe. “With both of you. And I need to ask you something.”

  Ask what? To date her? To have dinner with her? To—

  He returned his attention to her. “Bailey Voss, will you marry me?”

  Bailey felt all the air rush out of her lungs. Chloe shrieked and began jumping up and down.

  Kenny raised one shoulder. “There’s a lot we have to work through, I know. Details about where we’ll live and family stuff and—”

  “Yes,” Bailey said as she stepped into his embrace and kissed him. “Yes.”

  She held out one hand and Chloe joined them. Kenny wrapped his arm around the little girl, as well. They stood in the snow and hung on to each other.

  Later, they went inside. It was all a blur to Bailey. The actual movement and the removing of coats. Somehow they were piled together on the sofa, Bailey on one side of Kenny, Chloe on the other. The tree lights were on and there was a fire in the fireplace.

  “This is nice,” he said.

  She laughed. “Yes, it is.”

  He glanced at Chloe. “Someone needs to get to bed so that Santa can deliver presents.”

  Chloe smiled. “There is no Santa, but I’ll go to bed anyway. I’m tired.” She wrinkled her nose. “You two want to have some grown-up time.”

  Bailey thought about the magic that was Kenny’s kisses and knew that grown-up time would very much be welcome.

  She walked her daughter upstairs and helped her get ready. When Chloe was tucked in bed, Kenny joined them. He sat on the edge of the mattress and stroked Chloe’s cheek.

  “Will is always going to be your forever dad,” he said quietly. “I’m going to stand in for him, but I’m not taking his place.”

  Chloe sat up and hugged him. “You’re going to be my forever dad, too. Okay?”

  Kenny held her and nodded. He kissed her forehead. She lay back down and was asleep before they had left the room.

  Back downstairs, Kenny drew Bailey into his embrace and kissed her.

  “I love you,” he told her.

  “I love you, too.” She tilted her head. “What brought you to your senses?”

  One corner of his mouth turned up. “I tried to live without you. I couldn’t last two days. Whatever happens, it’s worth it.”

  She touched his cheek. “Kenny, I want to spend my life with you. I’m yours. I’m hoping that you’ll consider adopting Chloe, so she’s yours, too. Not just in your heart, but in the eyes of the law, too.”

  He stared at her. “You’d do that?”

  “Of course. I love you. Not just for Christmas, but for always.”

  He kissed her, then drew a small box out of his jeans pocket and handed it to her. She opened it and saw a sparkling diamond solitaire winking back at her. The beauty of the ring took her breath away, but the wonder of knowing this amazing man loved her was a feeling she wanted to hang on to forever.

  “I love you, Bailey,” he whispered. “Merry Christmas.”

  He slipped the ring on her finger and lowered his mouth to hers. Somewhere in the distance, bells began to chime. Christmas Day had arrived.

  * * * * *

  About the Author

  New York Times bestselling author Susan Mallery has won the hearts of millions of readers around the world with books described as “immensely entertaining, intensely emotional” (RT Book Reviews), “hilarious” (Fort Worth Star-Telegram) and “heartwarming” (Publishers Weekly). One major retailer recently described her as “the queen of romantic fiction.” While she deeply appreciates the accolades of critics and booksellers, Mallery is even more honored by the enthusiasm of her readers and the word of mouth that catapults her toward the top of the bestseller lists time and again.

  Mallery lives in not-so-sunny Seattle with her husband and a toy poodle who makes her laugh every day and who’s not even a little bit impressed by her growing fame. Visit Susan online at www.susanmallery.com.

  “There’s a little fun, a little sizzle, and a whole lot of homespun charm.”

  —Publishers Weekly on Summer Nights

  If you loved Christmas on Fourth Street by New York Times bestselling author Susan Mallery, be sure to check out these other great stories in the charming Fool’s Gold series, available now in ebook format!

  Until We Touch

  Before We Kiss

  When We Met

  Three Little Words

  Two of a Kind

  Just One Kiss

  “Halfway There” (ebook novella)

  A Fool’s Gold Christmas

  All Summer Long

  Summer Nights

  Summer Days

  “Almost Summer” (ebook novella)

  “Only Us” (ebook novella)

  Only His

  Only Yours

  Only Mine

  Summer Brides (anthology)

  “Sister of the Bride” (ebook novella)

  Finding Perfect

  Almost Perfect

/>   Chasing Perfect

  Order your copies today!

  Looking for more? With more than a hundred ebooks available, you can enjoy dozens of other memorable titles from New York Times bestselling author Susan Mallery, including her Blackberry Island trilogy, Barefoot Season, Three Sisters and Evening Stars!

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  ISBN-13: 97814592564770

  Yours for Christmas

  Copyright 2014 by Susan Macias Redmond

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  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental. This edition published by arrangement with Harlequin Books S.A.

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