The day I had shown up at Gabe's house, I had found them kissing. I told myself I was mad that Gabe was neglecting his duties but really I was just jealous. I was a dick to Gabe and said some shitty things. I had wanted to hurt them both. Why should they get to be so happy? She wasn't worthy, I lied to myself again.
I regretted it all now. I had gone too far, just as Gabe had said. I had let my jealousy and bitterness drive a wedge between Gabe and I and then I had cost Gabe his mate. It was unforgivable. I honestly hadn't expected her to offer to leave like she did. It showed how much she loved Gabe and it made me feel worse. It was well known that mates were everything to our kind. Our other half. Leaving your mate would be physically painful for both wolves.
Then when Gabe said I was dead to him, I knew I had let my jealousy grow out of control. After Gabe left I just stood there for a while. My other wolves returned after disposing of the rogue's body. I dismissed them quickly and tried to decide what to do. I considered going after Gabe to apologize but I was pretty sure that wouldn't accomplish anything. No, I needed to make this right. I needed to stop Carrie from leaving.
I shifted and ran as fast as I could to Gabe's house. I figured she would need clothes and her belongings so she would most likely return. It didn't take me long to get there. I shifted in the back and grabbed some clothes I had stashed by Gabe's house. We had clothes stashed all over since being nude could be inconvenient at times.
I went to the front and knew she was here. Her scent was strong around the house. A scent that was now mingled with Gabe's smell though he wasn't here. I tried to think of what I would say to her. I wasn't sure but I had to try. I walked up to the door but she opened it before I could even knock.
“What are you doing here?” She asked. Here goes nothing…….
Chapter 30
Carrie's POV
I stared at Jon like he was crazy. Now he wanted me to stay? I didn't trust him. He had made it clear I wouldn't be accepted here.
“Why?” I said to him.
“Because you are Gabe's mate.” He said simply.
“So!” I said shortly. “That never mattered to you before. You've known since the day I met you that I was Gabriel's mate. You've still treated me like shit.” I wasn't holding back. What did I have to lose?
“I know and I'm sorry.” He started. “I've been a dick. I know it. I don't know what came over me. Maybe I was jealous. I am sorry though.”
“I don't see how that changes anything. You've made it clear I'm not fit to be the Beta's mate. That I'm not good enough to be in this pack.” The thing that bothered me the most was he was right. I wasn't good enough and I had always known it.
“Look, I know what I said. To a point, it's true. A Beta female should know how to defend the pack and you don't. That does concern me. It's my job to protect this pack. But as much as I hate to admit it, your wolf is strong. Your parents, at least one of them, must have been an Alpha or Beta. We can sense power like that and you do carry that power.” I was taken aback by Jon's statement. One second he's telling me I can't defend the pack then he's telling me I'm strong. The part about my parents made me curious. I knew nothing about them. My adoptive parents had always said it was a closed adoption and they didn't know anything.
“What I'm saying,” Jon continued “is you can be trained.”
“Gabriel has been training me. You must have known that. So why the change Jon? I don't trust that you'll just flip again.” He shuffled his feet, looking ashamed.
“Because I was wrong. I can't hurt Gabe this way. I would kill to have my mate. I can't take away his just because I'm an ass. He's like a brother to me. Again, I'm sorry.” He didn't seem to regret the pain he had caused me, just the pain he had caused Gabriel. Still, he didn't really know me and he and Gabriel had been close. I thought for a moment.
“You can't keep tearing me down. I know I'm not like the other wolves here. I had no one to teach me anything and no one even told me what I was. The first time I shifted was when someone was attempting to rape me and my wolf took over to protect me. I want to learn.” I said. I saw anger flash across his face at the mention of someone trying to rape me, which I felt was odd but ignored it.
“Carrie, I promise, from today on, I will treat you as one of the pack. You will need a lot of training but I can help too. I'm sorry I've been so harsh with you. You're right. It's not your fault.” I felt a weight lift from chest at his words. I could stay! I could be with Gabriel.
“Thank you.” I said. My voice cracked and I realized I was crying again. I was just so relieved. “Can you do the mind thing and ask Gabriel to come home? I think we both need to speak to him.” He nodded and his eyes clouded for a moment. I saw him look frustrated and then seem to focus again.
“Dammit, he's blocking me out. I can't get through.” He tried a few more times and nothing. Then he looked at me.
“I'm worried Carrie. Gabe's never blocked me like this. I know he's pissed at me but still. He was very upset after you left. I'm afraid of what he might do.” I felt a jolt of panic shoot through me. Gabriel wouldn't do anything foolish would he? I wasn't sure and now we had no way of even reaching him.
“We need to go look for him!” I told Jon. I wished so much right now that Gabriel had marked me. Then I might be able to do the mind thing too. Jon nodded.
“I think we should.” He agreed. I told Jon to meet me out back and ran inside and threw my stuff down and stripped off my clothes. I went out into the backyard and immediately shifted. Jon's massive black wolf was already waiting for me and I went to his side and we took off. I followed Jon. Since I still wasn't an official pack member we had no way to communicate in our wolf form which was inconvenient. We raced through the woods until we hit the creek where the rogue attack had happened. Jon shifted back and I did the same. He averted his eyes and I was thankful.
“This was where I saw him last. He went north, we can try and follow his scent but it's faint.” He said. “I'm going to have a few other wolves start looking for him too.” I nodded and we shifted back and took off following Gabriel's scent.
We ran for a while. Gabriel's scent was faint but we were able to track it at least. When we hit a road I realized I knew exactly where we were. I barked to get Jon's attention and shifted.
“I know where we are and I think I know where Gabriel is.” I said. Jon, still in his wolf form nodded and I shifted back. This was the road to the overlook that Gabriel had taken me to. I really hoped he was just trying to be somewhere peaceful. Because if he was thinking of hurting himself….. I couldn't even finish the thought.
My heart was beating so fast as I made my way up the mountain road with Jon. Gabriel's scent was getting stronger and stronger, only confirming that he was here. Finally we reached the top and my heart nearly stopped. He was here and from the look of it, my worst fear was unfolding before my eyes.
Chapter 31
For a moment I just stood there in shock. Gabriel was here. He was dangerously close to the edge of the overlook. I felt panicked, my heart was hammering in my chest. I quickly shifted and started to run to him.
“Gabriel, don't!” I yelled. Tears were running down my face. This was partly my fault. I had broken his heart by insisting I had to leave. He whipped around when he heard my voice and had a puzzled look on his face.
“Carrie?” He started to walk towards me just as I crashed into his arms.
“Gabriel, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I love you. Please don't ever do anything like that again.” I pleaded through my tears. Gabriel looked confused.
“Like what?” He said. I sniffled and looked at him. He seemed truly puzzled.
“We couldn't find you so we tracked you…. and Jon thought you might be…..and then I saw you….so close to the edge and I….” I couldn't seem to speak coherently. I was blurting everything out in broken sentences. I was starting to feel embarrassed.
“Did you think I was going to jump?” Gabriel asked, the playful smile I loved so muc
h spreading across his face. I blushed a deep crimson, sure now that Jon and I had been wrong.
“I….uh….well, I worried…” I was making an ass out of myself. Serves me right for making such an assumption. I was looking at my feet, far too embarrassed to look Gabriel in the eye. He chuckled and tilted my head up to look at him and my blush deepened.
“I was feeling heartbroken. But I didn't come here to jump. I came here to think.” He said. “I was trying to figure out what to do. I figured I would come after you but after that?”
“Well, now you don't have to come for me.” I said.
“What made you come back?” He asked.
“Jon.” I said. “He found me before I could leave and we talked things out.” Gabriel seemed surprised. He looked around and saw that Jon was here. He was keeping a distance and still in his wolf form.
“What was discussed?” He asked.
“He apologized for being an ass. And he told me I had to stay, for you.” Gabriel looked at Jon now.
“I appreciate you doing that but it doesn't cancel out what you did.” He said harshly. Jon started to walk towards us, shifting when he got near.
“I know, but it's a start. I promised Carrie that she would be treated as a pack member from here on out. And once she's trained, we can make it official.” It felt nice to hear Jon say my name for once. For so long I had been referred to using one insult or another. Not only that, he was no longer denying me entry to the pack.
“Shouldn't have come to her leaving for you to do that.” Gabriel said.
“I know. I'm sorry. I was an ass. I was jealous. You know how long I've waited for my mate. I was bitter. I'm sorry I took it out on you and your mate.” He replied. Gabriel seemed to soften at Jon's admission.
“You'll find her eventually Jon.” Gabriel stated. Jon looked away, he didn't seem convinced.
“Yeah, well, in the meantime….” He trailed off. “I'm glad you're okay. I called off the search party. I'll let you and Carrie be alone. I'm sure you guys have plenty to talk about.” He said. Gabriel nodded and Jon turned around and shifted back into his black wolf.
Gabriel turned to me.
“Can we go home?” He asked.
“Yes!” I said. He kissed me and we walked hand in hand for a moment. Then he let go and we both shifted and made our way back to the house.
When we got to the house we both shifted back and made our way inside. There was this odd sense of happiness that we both seemed to be feeling, though we hadn't said a word since leaving the overlook.
Gabriel took my hand and led me to his bathroom. He turned on the shower and pulled me inside with him. I had forgotten about my injuries until the hot water hit them, making them sting. Some of my claw marks, from the rogue, had been rather deep but they had healed some over the last few hours. Now they were mostly shallow with some of the smaller cuts healed already. The water that was draining was a strange brown color as all the blood washed off of our bodies leaving only a few scabs on us both, still healing. Gabriel had a bite or two that I suspected would take a little longer to heal but overall he seemed fine. After we had finished cleaning our bodies, Gabriel kissed me. At first the kiss was tender, sweet and filled with love. I kissed him back and for the first time, I felt like nothing was holding me back. I had no fear of rejection. No fear that at some point I would be deemed unworthy and expelled. No fear that I would be a burden to Gabriel or embarrass him. It was freeing.
The kiss deepened as Gabriel started to touch my body. I moaned as he started to massage my breasts and his mouth moved to my neck, suckling and lightly biting on my sensitive flesh. His mouth moved even lower and he took my nipple in his mouth. While his mouth teased and sucked each nipple his hand moved between my legs and he started to tease and rub me. I moaned as I felt the tension building. Gabriel was making love to me and for once, I wasn't holding anything back. I reached out and touched Gabriel too. I stroked his hardness until a naughty idea came to mind. I dropped to my knees, turning Gabriel so his body shielded me from the stream of water. I took his hardness and put it to my mouth and snaked out my tongue, licking up and down teasingly. I wanted to please Gabriel as he had pleased me so many times before. He moaned as I took him in my mouth and suckled on him. He was so large, I could only get a few inches in my mouth but he didn't seem to mind. I had done this once before but this time I felt bolder. I sucked on him harder and used my hand and felt satisfied when Gabriel moaned and grabbed my hair. I moved faster and faster enjoying the sounds Gabriel was making. I wanted to bring him to climax and continued my brazen actions as Gabriel cried out. Suddenly Gabriel lifted me up and I pouted that he hadn't let me finish. But before I could protest he had lifted me up and I felt him pressing against my wetness before he thrust himself inside of me. I screamed as he thrust in and out. I was pinned to the wall of the shower with my legs wrapped around his waist. He lifted me slightly higher as he thrust harder and harder. My nails raked down his back as my body started to convulse with an orgasm. But Gabriel wasn't done yet. He slowed his pace and started to pull completely out before thrusting himself in slowly. He was looking me straight in the eyes and I was mesmerized. I couldn't take my eyes off Gabriel as he continued his slow sweet torture. He started to thrust harder and harder, our eyes still locked together. I broke eye contact as his pace continued to quicken and I screamed out in ecstasy again. Gabriel withdrew himself and I protested. He hadn't finished yet. He turned the shower off and led me out. He grabbed a towel and tenderly dried me off and then quickly dried himself. I gasped as I realized he was still hard.
He picked me up and walked into his room and threw me on the bed. I giggled and he crawled on top of me. He kissed me passionately and started to touch me again. I moaned, my body feeling so sensitive from all of our lovemaking. Then he kissed my neck again, driving my wolf wild.
“Please mark me.” I pleaded. I wanted to do this. To be Gabriel's in every way. Gabriel didn't hesitate. He kissed my neck again and then he pulled back and I could see he had partly shifted and his teeth were elongated and his eyes black. His wolf was in control now and he sucked on my neck and then I felt his fangs pressing. I braced myself expecting pain but when his teeth punctured my skin, I felt only pleasure. I moaned as I felt a strange energy seeping through my body. Gabriel withdrew his teeth and licked my neck where he had marked me. The licking seemed to soothe my broken skin. He thrust into me again and I screamed. I felt so many things at once and was confused by some of the new things I was feeling. I was feeling emotions that didn't seem like my own. It took me a few moments to realize they were Gabriel's feelings. Tears slid down my face. I could feel Gabriel's love for me. It was intense and pure. He loved me in a way I had never been loved before and I was overwhelmed.
Suddenly he flipped us over and I gasped at the sudden change of our position. I was on top now, but he was still inside me. I looked at him confused.
“Mark me, Carrie.” He said. My mouth formed into an “O” of surprise. I hadn't realized I would mark him too. I had thought that him marking me completed the process. I furrowed my brow. I had no idea how to do this. I assumed I would have to partially shift as Gabriel had done but how?
“Just let your wolf take over.” Gabriel said, seeing my confusion. I nodded and gave over to my wolf who was basically clawing to get to the surface. I felt my body shift slightly and my teeth change. I wondered if my eyes were dark like Gabriel's had been. My body felt as if it was moving on it's own as my wolf took control. I moved down to Gabriel's neck and kissed him just as he had done. Then my teeth penetrated his skin and I tasted the metallic taste of Gabriel's blood. Gabriel gasped as our connection grew. I could feel the change too. I felt a bond now that was even more intense.
“Ride me.” I heard the words without them being spoken and my eyes shot open. I realized Gabriel and I could mind link now. I sat there for a second feeling shy. I wasn't sure what to do.
“Just move up and down to start. Follow your instincts.”
Gabriel said inside my head again. I started to move, surprised by how deep inside me he was. For a moment, I was overwhelmed. I was feeling much more pleasure than normal and it was confusing. I realized I was feeling Gabriel's pleasure too. I started to grind my hips against Gabriel and moaned as it forced him deeper and deeper. Gabriel moaned as well and grabbed my hips, lifting me slightly as he started to thrust into me. I matched him thrust for thrust and was screaming as I orgasmed yet again. Gabriel moaned too as he finally climaxed as well and I felt his hot juices fill me. I laid my body down onto Gabriel's as I caught my breath. Gabriel kissed my head.
“I love you.” He said through the mind link.
“I love you too.” I said out loud looking at Gabriel. He kissed me again and gently withdrew himself from me. He held my body close to his and I sighed in contentment. We were fully mated now. Gabriel was mine and I was his, forever. I drifted off to sleep, feeling safe in the warmth of Gabriel's arms.
Chapter 32
The next day we spent mostly in bed. We didn't even bother to get dressed. We laid there and talked about our lives and I opened up to Gabriel as I never had before. I told him the whole story about my wolf attacking Malorie, about Ashley, about life inside the institute. Everything. He was a great listener. He told me stories about him and Jon when they were kids. They were apparently known to get in trouble together and he laughed as he told me about their antics.
When he and Jon were about 7 and 9, they had entered into a bet with each other. They had recently been watching a survival show on TV and had a dispute as to which of them would fare better in the wild. They decided to put it to the test. They had grabbed minimal supplies and set off to the woods. Neither had told their parents what they were up to. When it became dark and neither of the boys had returned home, their parent's became frantic. At this point it was pouring rain though and while they searched, the rain made it impossible to follow their scent. It wasn't until the next day they were found, soaking wet, covered in poison ivy and practically starving. Gabriel laughed recounting the memory.
The Journey To Become The Perfect Werewolf Page 12
