Norman, John - Gor 19 - Kajira of Gor.txt

Norman, John - Gor 19 - Kajira of Gor.txt Page 20

by Kajira of Gor [lit]

  wanted to surrender to nature, but feared, mightily, to do so. I sensed what a

  woman might become if she surrendered to nature. I scarcely dared think i~ an

  let alone speak it, How categorical, how fearful, how absolute and such a thing

  would be! Yet I longed for it. I wished a man would throw me to my belly and

  lock a collar on my throat.

  I wished to lie trembling at his feet, in the shadow of his Whip, knowing that

  thenceforth, whether I wished it or not, I existed for love, passion and

  service.

  “Leading position,” said Drusus Rencius. I swiftly put my head down and felt his

  fingers lock themselves deeply in my hair. I turned my head and pressed my lips

  suddenly, helplessly, to his thigh, kissing him. He twisted my head cruelly to

  the side, holding it there, turned, so that my lips could not touch him. My eyes

  brimmed with tears, not only from the pain, but more so, from the fact that I

  had been rejected.

  We had then passed the stranger, approaching, in the alley.

  Drusus Rencius released my hair, and I straightened up, continuing to follow

  him.

  We were almost at tile back entrance of the inn of Lysia

  I had been rejected!

  How furious I was at the girl who had so helplessly kissed the leg of Drusus

  Rencius. How she had humiliated and embarrassed me, the shameless tart! I hated

  and despised he~

  Where had she come from? Who was she? Surely she could

  We were then at the back entrance of the inn of Lysias.

  “Kneel here,” said Drusus Rencius, indicating a place near back entrance, near

  some garbage cans.

  I knelt, immediately, obediently.

  He entered the inn. He would see if anyone was about, or we might, unobserved,

  make our way up tile back stairs to room.

  I moaned softly, with need.

  I knelt near tile back entrance of the inn, near the garbage bins. I pulled

  weakly against the bracelets.

  I looked up, suddenly, startled. A man was standing there, king at me. He had

  come, apparently, from down the al-

  I put down my head, swiftly, so swiftly that it almost startled me, showing

  submission. I had seen his eyes. I was visibly frightened.

  Then back door of the inn opened and Drusus, to my relief, emerged.

  “She is not out for use?” asked the man.

  “No,” said Drusus. “Sorry.” He then snapped his fingers

  I leaped up and, at a gesture, preceded him into the inn, up tile rear stairs.

  I was trembling. I was sure that in another moment or two I, utterly helpless,

  might have been seized and penetrated Mli the alley.

  In a moment, then, we were again in the room, and Drusus had locked the door

  behind us.

  I leaned back against the door, my head back, breathing deeply. “He thought you

  had been put out for raping,” said Drusus, chuckling to himself.

  I looked at him.

  “Did you enjoy the house of Kliomenesr” asked Drusus.

  How absurd to me seemed the lightness, the casual cast, of his question. The

  experience had been an incredibly meaningful one for me. Scarcely never before,

  I think, had I been so in touch with my femaleness. It was hard to conceive of

  aow one could be more in touch with one’s femaleness, unless, of course, one

  were oneself a slave.

  Drusus Rencius looked at me. Then I went to where he stood, and knelt down

  before him.

  He looked down at me, angrily, startled. “What are you doing?” he asked.

  “Kneeling down before you,” I said, “helpless, braceleted,’ as a woman before a

  man.”

  His fists were clenched.

  “If you want me,” I said, “have me.”

  “Get up!” he cried. Then he seized me by the upper arms and pulled me to my

  feet. He held me before him.

  “Taste the slave in me,” I begged.

  He looked down into my eyes, fiercely. His grip on- my arms, holding me

  absolutely helplessly, was like iron.

  “Oh, would that you were a slave,” he whispered, intensely.

  “Would that you were a slave!”

  He then, lifting me from my feet as though I might have been no more than a

  doll, suddenly, violently, with a cry of rage, flung me from him, yards from

  him, to the surface of the bed. On the bed I scrambled to my knees. The wall was

  at my back.

  There were sounds from outside the window, cries in the street.

  Drusus Rencius went to the window, listening. “Corcyrus,” he said, “has seized

  the mines of Argentum. has begun.”

  “What has begun?” I asked, frightened.

  “War,” said Drusus Rencius.

  “I will return you to the palace, immediately,” be said. He

  I looked at him, frightened.

  indicated that I should lie on my belly on the bed before him. I did so and,

  lying on the bed, my head turned to the side, sunk partly in its softness, felt

  the bracelets removed from me.

  I rose from the bed, pulling down the edges of the brief, one-piece garment I

  wore. Drusus Rencius returned the slave bracelets to his pouch. “My garments,

  please,” I said. I would have him serve me. He handed me my garments. I retired

  behind the screen and, in a few moments, re-emerged.

  “Lady Sheila will require a new guard,” he said.

  “No,” I said. “I will not.”

  He looked at me, surprised.

  “You are not relieved of your duties,” I said. “You are still my guard, and will

  continue to serve me as such.”

  “Lady Sheila well knows how to torture a man,” he said.

  “Yes,” I said. “I do.”

  He regarded me, bitterly.

  “Return me now to the palace” I said.

  “Yes, Tatrix,” he said.

  9 I Determine to Take Cognizance in the City

  I stood by the barred window in my quarters, looking out. I could see portions

  of the courtyard below, sections of the inner walls and the first of the two

  gates leading to the outside. I could also see, back from the walls, a portion

  of the square outside the gates. Most of the crowd outside the gates I could not

  see. I could see some men and women moving across the square, presumably to join

  it. It was the second rach crowd in the past week. I saw some men, across the

  square, perhaps seeing someone in my window, stop, and shake their fists. I

  moved away from the window.

  “Mistress!” cried Susan, entering with a tray, stopping suddenly, spilling wine.

  She looked at me, with the sudden terror of a slave who had been clumsy.

  “Forgive me, Mistressl” she cried. “I will clean it up immediatelyt”

  I watched her while she put down the tray, picked up the goblet, and hurried to

  fetch cloths and water. In a moment she was on her hands and knees, frightened,

  cleaning the floor. I myself, of course, a woman of wealth and position, a

  Tatrix even, was above such tasks. They were properly to be performed by lesser

  women. Ideally, of course, they fell to those women for whoin they were

  perfectly suited,
slaves.

  “Susan,” I said.

  “Yes, Mistress,” she said, looking up from her hands and knees, frightened.

  “Why did you spill the wine?” I asked.

  “I am sorry, Mistressl” she said.

  “Why did you spill it?” I asked. She had seemed surprised.

  “I was startled, Mistress,” she said. “I had not expected to find you here. I

  had thought that I bad seen you in an anteroom off the great hall, only some Ehn

  earlier.”

  “You were mistaken,” I said.

  “Yes, Mistress,” she said.

  “There is another crowd outside the gate this evening,” I said.

  “Yes, Mistress,” said the girl.

  “It is an angry crowd again, is it not?” I asked.

  “I fear so, Mistress,” said the girl.

  I went to the barred window, and looked out. I could hear the crowd but, because

  of the walls and gates, could see very little of it.

  “I think guardsmen will soon issue forth to disperse it” said Susan.

  “’Can you make out what they are shouting, what they want?” I asked, lightly.

  “No, Mistress,” said Susan, putting down her head.

  “I can make it out quite clearly, from the window,” I said irritably.

  “Forgive me, Mistress,” said Susan.

  “Speak,” I said.

  “They call for the blood of the Tatrix of Corcyrus,” she said,

  “whom they call tyranness and villainess of Corcyrus.”

  “But, why?” I asked. “Why?”

  “I do not know, Mistress,” said Susan. “There are scarcities in the city. They

  may be angry about the progress of the War!

  “But the war goes well,” I said.

  “Yes, Mistress,” said Susan, putting her head down.

  There was then a heavy knock at the door. “Ligurious, first minister of

  Corcyrus,” announced a voice, that of a guard.

  “Enter,” I said.

  The door opened and Ligurious, with his imposing stature, yet leonine grace,

  entered. He bowed to me, and I inclined my bead to him.

  At his entrance Susan put the palms of her hands on the floor and lowered her

  head to the tiles, assuming a position of slave obeisance common with her in the

  presence of her master. I wondered if Ligurious’s slave master required this

  position of all of his women. I supposed so.

  Ligurious looked down at her, irritably. It was clear what she had been doing.

  “Was it she who spilled the wine?” he asked.

  “Yes,” I said.

  “If you do not wish to exert yourself,” he said, “I can have her whipped for

  you.”

  “It is all right,” I said. “She is only a stupid, meaningless slave.

  “Run along, Susan,” I said. “You can finish later.”

  “Yes, Mistress,” said Susan, leaping up, darting away.

  “Tonight,” said Ligurious, “I will give her to guardsmen. She will dance the

  whip dance, naked.” There are many whip dances on Gor, of various sorts. In a

  context of this sort, presumably not in a tavern, and without music, the girl is

  expected to move, writhe and twist seductively before strong men. If she does

  not do well enough, if she is insufficiently maddeningly sensuous, the whips

  fall not about her, but on her. When one of the men can stand it no longer be

  orders her to his mat where, of course, she must be fully pleasing. If he is

  not, then she is whipped until she is. Then, when one man is satisfied, the

  dance begins again, and continues in this fashion until all are satisfied, or

  tire of the sport.

  “How goes the war?” I said.

  “I have come to report another glorious victory,” said Liarious.

  “This one has occurred on the Plains of Eteocles.”

  “ne enemy, then,” I said, “is east of the Hills of Eteocles, it is through the

  Pass of Theseus.”

  “You have been examining maps?” inquired Ligurious.

  “I made inquiries,” I said. He saw I could not read. I was illiterate in Gorean.

  “I see,” he, said.

  I heard men shouting, and the rattle of weaponry outside, down in the courtyard.

  I hurried to the barred window.

  “Those will be guardsmen,” said Ligurious, “issuing forth to disperse the

  rabble.”

  “Yes,” I said. I could see a double line of guardsmen, with shields and spears,

  exiting through the gates. In a moment, too, I could see men and woman fleeing

  across the square.

  “Those are small groups of dissidents,” said Ligurious. “Pay them no mind. You

  are loved in Corcyrus.”

  “Each of our victories,” I said, “seems to occur closer to Corcyrus.”

  “Surely you saw the silver brought in from Argentum?” he asked.

  “Yes,” I said. “It was prominently displayed in the victory parade several weeks

  ago, that over which we presided.”

  “Over which you presided, my Tatrix,” said he, modestly.

  “Yes,” I said.

  I recalled this parade well. Ligurious had been in the palanquin with me. He had

  been, in his force and presence, both visible and prominent. I, as earlier,

  apparently in accord with the public customs of Corcyrus, had been unveiled. My

  features, it seemed, would be well known to thousands.

  “It seems little more silver has been forthcoming,” I said.

  Ligurious was silent.

  “Did your troops enter Argenturn?” I asked. A

  “Our generals did not feet it was necessary,” said Ligurious

  “It seems that our first victory, after the seizure of the mines, occurred on

  the Fields of Hesius,” I said.

  “Yes,” said Ligurious.

  “Our second occurred on the shores of Lake las,” I said, “and our third east of

  the Issus.” This was a northwestward flowing river, tributary to the Vosk, far

  to the north.

  “Yes, my Tatrix,” said Ligurious.

  “Now we have been victorious once more,” I said, “this time on the Plains of

  Eteocles.”

  “Yes, my Tatrix,” said Ligurious.

  “They lie within a hundred pasangs of Corcyrus,” I said.

  “It is part of a plan, my Tatrix,” said Ligurious. “We are stretching their

  supply lines. Then, when we wish, soon, now, we will strike like a tam, cutting

  them. We will then subject a starving, demoralized enemy to devastating attacks.

  * Have no fear, Lady. They will soon be helpless. We will soon have them beneath

  our swords.”

  “Are there scarcities in the city?” I asked.

  “There are none in the palace,” said Ligurious. “Did Lady ‘Sheila enjoy her

  spiced vulo this evening?”

  “In the city?” I said.

  “In a time of conflict,” said Ligurious, “there are always some privations.”

  “Are they minor?” I asked.

  “Yes,â�
�� he said. “With your permission,” he said. He then bowed, and withdrew.

  I watched him withdraw. I wondered what it would be like to have to do obeisance

  to such a man, and what it would be like to be in his arms.

  I then turned again to the barred window. From where I stood, sometimes, I could

  see tarn wire, as the light struck it, in its swaying movements. It was strung

  about, over the courtyard, between the palace and the walls. Too, it had been

  strung elsewhere, I had heard, in the city.

  The door opened and Susan entered, and knelt down and lowered her head. It is

  common for slaves to kneel when entering the presence of free persons. It is

  common, too, of course, more generally, for them to kneel whenever they find

  themselves in the presence of a free person, for example, if they are in a room

  and a free person enters.

  “You may finish your work,” I informed the slave, from Cincinnati, Ohio.

  “Yes, Mistress. thank you, Mistress,” said the girl. In a moment, then, she was

  again, on her hands and knees, with water and cloths, her bead down, rinsing and

  cleaning the files, thoroughly and carefully removing the residue of sticky,

  half-dried wine from them.

  “Susan,” I said.

  “Mistress?” she asked, raising her head.

  “Did Ligurious speak to you?” I asked.

  “Yes, Mistress,” she said.

  “You know that tonight you are to- to dancer,

  “Yes, Mistress,” she said. “Before selected guardsmen. The whip dance.”

  “It was not my idea, Susan,” I said. “I did not ask Ligurlous to have you

  punished. It was his idea. I want, you to know that. I am sorry.”

  “It had not even occurred to me that it might have been your idea, Mistress,”

  smiled Susan. “You did not even want me punished. Mistress has always shown me

  incredible lenience. Mistress has always shown me incredible kindness. It is

  almost as if—‘

  “Yes?” I said.

  “—almost as if Mistress has some idea of the helplessness and vulnerability of

  the slave.”

  “And how,” I asked angrily, “would I, a free woman, have any idea of that?”

  “Forgive me, Mistress,” said Susan. “Of course you, as a free woman, could not!”

  I was angry. I considered whipping the little, collared slut. She put her head

 

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